Crave the Darkness (34 page)
“He can join with the shadows,” Raif said with obvious concern. “Tyler, she’s not here.”
It didn’t take a conversational wizard to know that Raif feared I was already dead. Or worse. He knew that Kade could
borrow
the abilities of any supernatural creature if he stole their life essence. Shame welled up within me, squeezing all of the air from my lungs. Raif knew just how Kade went about taking that energy from his victims, too. How would I ever be able to look him in the eye again?
Oh, god
. As if it wasn’t shameful enough to have Raif realize what might have happened to me. I’d rather stay in this horrible body forever than have Tyler know what Kade had done to me—and the things I’d begged him for in return.
Kade sighed. “So. Bored. I have a codex to retrieve and a traitorous bitch to kill. By the way, thanks for leaving Anya without her guards,” he said. “You’ve made my job tonight much easier. So if you’re done trying to talk me to death, I think I’ll explore the shadows for a bit before I pay that leather-loving cunt a visit.”
Before Kade could react, Tyler’s magic slammed into him with the force of a blizzard. My breath fogged from the cold, and though Kade’s back was to me, I could sense his body stiffen. “You can’t hide behind Adira anymore,” Tyler said, his voice calm and even. “There’s no more bond for me to acknowledge, and you’re going to suffer for what you did to her.”
Kade pushed me backward as he took several steps toward the bed. Tyler had managed to keep me locked in my corporeal form before. He’d done that to Kade now. I had a feeling Kade hadn’t given much thought to my vulnerabilities, only my strengths. I was certainly unique, but by no means infallible. The only weapons at his disposal now were the knife in his hand and his good looks. I didn’t think the latter was going to do him much good. I tripped on my own goddamned feet as Kade pushed me back, and I fell to the floor beside my bed, doubling over in pain. Every muscle in my body seemed to seize up simultaneously.
While Julian and Myles hung back, Tyler and Raif converged on Kade. He pulled back the knife in his hand and let it fly. Raif drifted into shadow as the weapon sailed right through his incorporeal form. The dark mist converged, solidifying into his physical body, and he continued forward. Kade was the one who had no clue what he was up against. “Where’s Darian?” Raif asked again, leveling his sword at Kade’s chest.
“If you kill me, you’ll never know,” Kade answered.
“We’ll kill your female, then.” Raif’s tone couldn’t have been more serious.
I gripped the side of the mattress, my breath coming in quick little pants as I attempted to breathe through the pain. “Do it,” Kade said. “Kill her. She’s been dead once, haven’t you,
Evelena
? I doubt she’ll mind a return trip to the afterlife.”
Tyler and Raif exchanged a look, and I knew that they’d kill me. Ty’s gaze wandered from Kade, down to the spot on the floor where I cowered in pain as if this were the first time he’d truly noticed me. He studied me, his brow furrowed in an almost confused expression. My gaze locked with his. Those damn hazel eyes had always been my downfall. I couldn’t look away. He sidled away from Raif, taking a step closer, and then another. I pressed my body against the side of the bed, closer to Kade and away from Ty. I just wanted the pain to stop. I felt as though my body were burning from the inside out.
Kade didn’t seem too concerned with anything other than saving his own skin. “Perhaps my mate killed your friend,” he suggested. “She’s . . . not herself, but you’re welcome to question her.”
Tyler cocked his head to the side, his eyes boring eyes boa hole right through me. His lips parted, and he reached out his hand, fingers extended toward me. Raif stood wary, sword held high. “What in the hell are you doing, Tyler? Back away.”
He ignored Raif as if he hadn’t even spoken. Kade stepped away from me, turning slightly in a defensive stance against Tyler’s approach, giving Raif a clearer view. My jaw clamped tight as another round of painful cramps seized my body, and I swallowed a scream. I hurt so badly. I wanted to wish for Tyler’s help, but Kade had forbidden me to speak. And though, logically, I knew that he couldn’t control me, I couldn’t get my body to follow through with that belief. The addiction had been instant and crippling, and
it
, not Kade, controlled me completely.
I’d been too consumed with my own pain and anguish to realize what Kade had really been doing. He’d shifted the focus from himself, making sure that all eyes were on me. He slunk away from the bed like the snake he was, slowly putting distance between us. I reached out, fear coiling in my stomach. I’d die without him. The pain would eat me alive. Kade was going to let Raif kill me.
“Tyler,” Raif said in a warning tone, “back
away
.”
Again, he ignored Raif, and I turned my attention away from Tyler as his hand stretched out as if toward a wary animal. I needed Kade. Needed him to take away my pain. But from the corner of my eye, I caught sight of Ty’s hand coming closer, and a thought scratched at the back of my mind. A single-minded obsession that had been my mantra through all of the lonely months I’d been without him.
Only Ty could fix me.
. . .
Instead of reaching out for Kade, I turned, stretching my hand out to meet Ty. The moment our fingers touched, something sparked within me, a connection so deep and so powerful that the pain that ruled me so completely paled in comparison.
“Darian,” Tyler whispered. The word rolled off his tongue with the reverence that I loved so much and I cried out, my heart beating a frantic rhythm that echoed in my ears.
Pamela’s spell shattered like myriad shards of glass peppering my skin. The tightness of that second skin vanished, and though I was still feeling the effects of withdrawal, I felt as though a tremendous weight had been lifted. The air seemed to still, and my apartment grew quiet as all eyes in the room turned to me.
Kade had gotten the distraction he wanted. And the bastard wasn’t going down without a fight.
Chapter 34
K
ade may have been confined to corporeality, but he was anything but weak or helpless. He burst from his human facade like a football player breaking through one of those paper barriers cheerleaders hold up. If I’d thought the image of those snakelike eyes and serpentine tail were a shocker, it was nothing compared to the creature that stood before us now. At least eight feet tall and corded with sinewy muscle, the half snake, half man demon plowed into Tyler with such speed that he didn’t have time to defend himself before Kade knocked him to the floor.
That tail coiled around me, constricting me in its grasp as Kade drew me to him, holding me tight against his scaled body. His forked tongue flicked out, rasping against my skin, and I shuddered, the effects of his druglike touch a hundred-fold what it was in his human form. I moaned with pleasure, unconcerned about who might hear as I went limp in his grasp.
Myles and Julian crept forward, their steps cautious. What had been a kill mission was now a hostage situation, and Kade had no qualms about using me to get out of this alive. “I’ve drained her.” Kade’s voice slithered from his throat in a gravelly rasp. “I wonder if she’ll have the strength to heal if I crush her?” His tail constricted around me so tight that I felt my bones creak, and I cried out. Tyler lunged toward us. “Not a move, Jinn,” Kade warned. “I won’t think twice about killing your Charge.” His tongue flicked out again, dipping between my breasts, and I gripped the tail wound around my body, leaning toward his mouth. That same drunken haze blanketed my mind, and all I wanted was more. “Tastes like honey,” he said to Tyler. “She’s a firecracker, isn’t she? Before you crashed my party, I had her begging for my cock.”
The sound of an enraged animal tore from Tyler’s throat. A ripple shook his form, and his magic washed over my senses as he transformed into a hulking golden-furred bear. He pawed at the floor, cutting finger-wide grooves into the wood, and shook his head furiously from side to side. I hadn’t seen Tyler in this form since the first time he’d saved me from an out-of-control egomaniac. I guess Kade had pushed Ty just a little too far and he’d lost whatever meager control he’d had on his temper.
Frost formed on the windows, and I shivered in Kade’s grasp, as much from the high as the cold. Floating in an ocean of sensual bliss, I had a hard time focusing on my surroundings, let alone the standoff taking place in the middle of my apartment. Raif gave Tyler a wide berth as though he was just as wary of the bear as he was the demon before him. Julian and Myles closed in, their shadow forms winding stealthily to the back corner of the apartment behind Kade.
Tyler swiped out with one massive claw, catching Kade in the leg. He bared his teeth, now pointed fangs, hissing at the bear before constricting me tighter. My breath squeezed out of my lungs, and black spots swam in my vision. I tried to draw a deep breath—a rib cracked under the pressure—and a scream strangled its way up my throat despite my lack of air.
The bear threw its head back and bellowed.
Kade listed to one side as Julian came at him. He’d regained his physical form just before crashing into Kade, but the demon was so big that it did little more than nudge him. One massive arm curved in an arc as he batted Julian away, sending him sailing back across the apartment. A string of curses erupted from Julian’s mouth as he rolled onto his back, massaging his chest. “Call off your pups,” Kade ordered Raif. “Or I’ll tear out her throat.”
Raif held up a hand, and it was as good as any shouted command. Even Tyler stilled, the golden fur rippling on his massive body as he gave a worried chuff of breath. Time seemed to stand still as Kade sidestepped cautiously toward the elevator. He couldn’t be bothered to navigate the furniture and just plowed over a couple of end tables. Something stirred beside us, a flash of motion that seemed more imagined than real, and Kade’s head slammed to the side as if he’d been struck by an invisible fist.
“You must want her dead!” Kade shouted. “I said to call off your dogs, Shaede!”
“It’s not one of ours!” Raif shouted back. From the look on his face, he was just as thrown as Kade.
No one got the chance to argue further, however. Another assault followed as something slammed into Kade, throwing us back against the wall. My head whipped back, crashing into a picture frame. Glass dug into my scalp and rained down on us, scattering like pebbles. Footsteps crunched on the shards, but aside from the sound, nothing indicated the presence of a body. I fought through the haze of my mind, past the high, the discomfort of withdrawal that was beginning to once again pulse through me. Familiarity tugged at my mind as I remembered the day I’d been working out in Xander’s gym: the sensation of knowing someone was close, but seeing nothing but a fleeting shadow of movement. And then again at The Pit: sitting right across from me, and yet, unnoticed by everyone else present.
Asher
.
I still had no clue how the little shit did it, and I didn’t care. He was here, in my apartment and no one—not even the other Shaedes—could see or sense him, which meant something other than shadow cloaked him. The assault continued, unrelenting as Kade took blow after blow. He roared to the ceiling, thrashing his massive body, lashing out at the seemingly invisible force that attacked him. I was nothing more than a rag doll in his grasp, my body tossing like flotsam in the sea with every violent whip of the tail that held me.
How long had Ash been watching? He’d objected to my meeting with Pamela without backup; could he have tailed me? I doubt it. If he’d followed me there, he would have known about the glamour and could have broken it at any time. Right? Shit, my brain was so hazy I had no idea if my thoughts were even coherent. I had to do something. If Kade managed to get out of my apartment and take me with him, he’d continue to torture me, to keep me addicted to his touch until I died from want of it. No matter how bad I hurt, I couldn’t let him take me. Not that I was strong enough—of body
or
will—to fight him.
Asher could knock him around all he wanted, but it wasn’t going to put Kade down. Only one thing could do that, and I was going to give it to him. “Left side of the bed, between the mattresses!” I shouted. “Right through the heart!”
My words were just cryptic enough. But in my drugged state, the words might have come out of my mouth completely different from how I’d imagined them in my mind. I could have shouted a grocery list for all I knew. The assault on Kade stopped and my heart leapt up into my throat. Every occupant in the apartment seemed to hold their breath in anticipation of what would happen next. Furious, Kade spun and bolted for the elevator. Tyler took after him, no longer hanging back in fear of what the demon might do to me. If I had to guess, Ty was more worried that he’d manage to get away and take me with him. Kade kicked at the gate on the elevator with one massive, clawed foot, collapsing the metal into the car. He took one step inside the compartment and froze. The hilt of a dagger protruded from his chest as if he’d simply run into the damned thing. He clawed at his chest, desperate to remove the blade, and his grip on me slackened.
A pained snarl worked its way up his throat, and the serpentine tail unwound, dropping me to the floor in a heap. Tyler used the moment to his advantage, tackling Kade to the floor. Someone grabbed me under the arms and dragged me backward, and I watched in horror as my protector clawed at the demon and ripped his throat open with his teeth. An urge welled up inside of me, a desperation to protect Kade. It was the addiction holding me firmly in its grasp, and I knew it. But still, I fought against the arms that held me as I tried to keep the bear from rippingÀ from ri him to shreds.
“Darian, stop!” Asher said as he struggled to keep me still. “I’ve got you, you’re safe.”
“No!” I cried. Tears streamed down my face as I sobbed. “Don’t kill him, Tyler! Please! I—I need him!” I’d be in so much pain soon; I could already feel the tremors move up my limbs as I fought Asher’s grasp.
Asher pulled me into his arms and held me tight, more to keep me from fighting than anything. He quietly shushed me, smoothing my hair away from my face. “You’re going to be okay,” he said. “I promise.”
My mind had become clearer, but the pain had yet to subside. Over the sound of my own crying, I heard a warning growl. Kade lay in a bloodied mass of scaly skin and bone near my elevator, and Raif was on the phone with god only knew asking a frantic string of questions about Kade’s effect on his victims, while Julian and Myles left the apartment at some order barked from Raif only seconds ago. The bear prowled toward us, his eyes locked on Asher, upper lip bared to show his huge canines. I liked Ash too much to see him turned into a bite-sized snack for Ty, and so, despite the fact that I could barely support myself, I pushed myself away from Asher. “L-let him c-cool down,” I said between shuddering breaths as my body shook uncontrollably. “He’s just t-trying to p-protect m-me.”
Asher’s eyes narrowed in Tyler’s direction, but he didn’t argue. Raif jerked his chin, effective as a stern order, and he left my side, but not before throwing a warning glance of his own in Tyler’s direction.
The bear mewled nervously, his lips vibrating as he sniffed the air around me. He pawed at the floor, more like a nervous puppy than wild beast this time. He took a step forward, and then back before resting on his haunches. He let out a low whine and shook out his fur. I wiped at the tears welling in my eyes and watched him for a moment more. Tyler was afraid to approach me.
I held out a shaking hand, and he came closer, tentative, bowing his head to show that he wasn’t a threat. My fingers dove into his soft fur, and I wrapped my arms around his massive neck as he sniffed at my cheek. I think he wanted to lick me, but he didn’t. He’d seen Kade’s tongue on my skin and what it had done to me and I was grateful that he held back, because I didn’t think I’d be able to stand that sort of contact just yet.
Ty took a step closer so I could lean against his shoulder. The quaking in my limbs was getting worse and my muscles cramped. Over and over again, I ran my hands through the thick fur, hoping that the sensation would help to calm me down. What would happen to me now that Kade was dead? I closed my eyes, and the fur became more silky than coarse and Tyler’s bear form melted away. He took me gently into his arms and cradled me as if he could protect me from every evil in the world.
The dam of my composure broke, and my breath hitched as I began to cry in earnest. “Oh, gods,” Tyler lamented, his tone proof enough of his own sorrow. “I’m so sorry, Darian. I’m so, so sorry.”
“Make it stop.” I dug my fingers into his arm, gritted my teeth against the pain. “Please Tyler, I can’t take the pain. Can you please just make it stop?”
He laid his lips to my temple as he rocked me in his arms. “I’ll do what I can,” he said. “Just say the words.”
“Tyler,” I said through my tears. “I wish you’ÀI wish yd make my pain go away.”
His embrace tightened, and his own voice was thick with emotion when he said, “Your wish is
ever
my command.”
My world went dark before I could chide him for the cheesy genie line.
* * *
Hellish nightmares plagued me in my sleep. My body raged with passion and pain, my mind grasping on to images of a dark serpentine tail caressing my naked body. I thrashed wildly as strong arms held me down, as comforting words were spoken in my ear. When the images in my mind would become unbearable, a dark emptiness would consume me until I swam once again just below the surface of my consciousness, only to have the cycle start again.
I floated in and out of my semiconscious state for what felt like weeks. I shivered as if cold and felt the weight of many blankets being laid on my body until I was so hot with fever that I had no choice but to kick the covers off. I had no idea where I was or who tended to me, but I didn’t care. All I wanted was more of that black, oblivious sleep that spared me from the images of Kade that were burned in my memory.
* * *
“Darian, can you hear me?” I knew the voice, but it lacked the hardness I’d become used to. My eyelids fluttered as I came slowly awake, drawn to the voice urging me to consciousness. “Darian?”
Damn, had my eyelids been glued shut? It seemed that no matter how hard I tried to pry them open, they just wouldn’t budge. I rolled onto my back, every muscle in my body screaming at me not to move. The stiffness wasn’t something I was used to, and for the first time since my transformation from human to supernatural, I felt very much centuries old.
“Can you sit up? I brought you some water.”
One eye popped open and then the other. The light in Xander’s enormous suite was muted, a single lamp at the far end of the room illuminating the space. I pressed my hands into the mattress and tried to push myself up, but my arms wobbled under the weight.
“I’ll help you.”
Anya reached behind me and brought me forward before settling another pillow behind my back. She helped me to recline, taking care to move my body slowly. I gave my head a little shake as I looked over her loose-fitting linen pants and matching shirt, convinced I was still dreaming. “What are you wearing?” I asked, my voice weak and hoarse. I couldn’t even muster any humor into my tone.
“Did you think I’d wear leather through my entire pregnancy?” If my voice had sounded weak, Anya’s was downright fragile. The sharp edge of sorrow still lingered in her tone. Her violet eyes glowed softly in the darkened room, but there was a new depth to them, an unfathomable sadness that made her appear somewhat softer. She handed me a glass of water, and I took it in my shaky grasp.