CUL-DE-SAC (On The Edge Book 1) (21 page)

***

Catalina wasn’t so far off the mark, or
that was what he had thought half an hour earlier himself, Xan admitted.

He was convinced shopping was one of those
things he would hate more than teeth pulling… without an anesthetic. He had
never been insane enough to accompany any woman during the task that carried
all signs of being excruciatingly boring, much less basically volunteering to
do that like he did this time.

Sex didn’t seem like enough of an incentive
to endure something like that.

Yet here he was, going from one shop to
another with a woman with whom he hadn’t even had sex yet, and the most surprising
part was he enjoyed it all.
“I want to see you wearing these…” He said and Cat looked at the sensual pair
of heels he held oh-so-casually.

The broad strap was like an elegant cuff
that rounded the ankle and it was tied together with two delicate laces in the
front, giving character to the open-toe of sexy Louboutin. The flirtatious
stroke of red on the heel of otherwise smooth black suede would liven up every
outfit, she thought, stroking her finger over it.
“I can do that,” she agreed, but he bent his head when she tried to take them
from him and whispered into her ear.
“… and nothing more Kitten.”
“On second thought, I think I will pass.” But she already wanted them even
before the wicked image took a root in her mind.
“Come on, I can see you want it, Cat. Where is your sense of adventure?” Xan
tempted, wondering whether he was pushing her too far.
“I think our idea of ‘adventure’ is considerably different.” She looked up at
him.
“I guess you will just have to catch up with me, but for now… try them and
leave the rest on as well.” He sighed deeply as if she were trying his patience
and he was at the end of his rope, but the wicked gleam in his eyes reassured
her he was having as much fun as she did.

Catalina wasn’t sure what to expect of him,
especially after Chloé’s words, but discovering the playful side of Xan was not
it, she decided, although it was as much unexpected as it was welcomed.

She saw the way the sales clerk was gazing
up at him, because as Chloé noticed, there was no doubt he was good looking if
someone liked the rough and dangerous type.

Apparently most women did, because the
shop-assistant wasn’t the only one whose looks Catalina noticed. One customer
coquettishly flipped her hair and another, a teenager really, straightened up
when they were passing her on their way to a fitting room.

Yet either Xan seemed completely oblivious
to the havoc his presence alone was wreaking among the female’s population, or
he was too used to it to pay attention. Probably the latter, Cat decided and
for some reason it dampened her mood somewhat.

What was a man like
him
doing with
her
?

It was not that she thought herself to be
unattractive; she was aware of her merits as much as she was conscious of her
flaws. But the looks she was receiving from all those women who were ogling Xan
were full of surprise, as if they too couldn’t help but wonder
why her
?
“I think I found you a dress for tonight,” he announced and Catalina blinked as
if coming awake from a deep slumber.
“Oh?” She tilted her head and regarded the red cocktail dress he took off a
rack.

It was short but not skimpy, with an
asymmetrical shoulder strap draping into the softly cut sweetheart neckline. A
large jeweled center embellishment and a delicate ruche transformed the bust
into the most eye-catching part of the attire.

Ruffles of sheer fabric cascaded down the
front of the dress, adding a hint of subtle romance to the skirt. She loved the
color and material, but mostly she loved the way he seemed to see who she was
by choosing a dress she could have picked up herself.
“It’s lovely, Xan,” she said when her throat clenched with an unnamed emotion.

She was used to people who acted as if they
knew who she was and what she stood for, while in reality they couldn’t be any
further from grasping it. But Xan was stripping her cool and collected mask
away, leaving her bare with an ease that took her breath away.

She was afraid of what he might find
underneath the seamlessly polite exterior her grandmother instilled upon her.
This unease was not caused only by his reaction to whatever he could unearth,
but her own as well, since there were moments in her life where she was unsure
what kind of a person she was and what she was made of.

The only time she was pushed to her limits
regarded her photography, and while it was something of her on a personal level,
it didn’t quite reach the core of her.
“As much as I loved those black heels you have yet to try, I think these are a
better fit for the dress.” He said at the exact moment she saw them herself.

The heels were red as well, with a
bedazzled rhinestone t-strap and flirty open toe. They were perfect for many
outings, really, Catalina decided, half in love with the glitter texture of the
stilettos.
“Model it for me, Kitten.” He handed it over to her, taking a seat in an armchair
situated in front of a fitting room.

Xan enjoyed teasing Catalina, constantly
pushing her until her cheeks turned pink, and she did her best to hide how much
he was flustering her. He liked that a lot because the truth was he had never
engaged himself in these kind of games with any woman before, not interested in
anything more than a few pleasant moments under the sheets.

He couldn’t wait to have her and the fact
she was prolonging the moment, making him work for it instead of giving in
instantly, had his desire at fever pitch.

Xan kept replaying Kelton’s words over and
over in his mind.

He wanted to know more about Catalina, but
did he bother to learn her?

He knew she had plenty of questions of her
own, which had yet to be addressed, but her inborn self-restraint was stopping
her from blasting him with them. Moderation or maybe etiquette, it didn’t
really matter, he supposed, since the end result remained the same and it suited
him either way just fine.

It was more than obvious the moment he
started asking about her that she would no longer stop herself from her query,
and talking about his past or plans for the future was the very last thing he
wanted to do.

In this case there was no middle ground to
be found, he thought, so how exactly was he to go around it?

Kelton failed to find a solution for this
part, he smirked inwardly.

His cell vibrated and when he pulled it
from the back pocket of his jeans, he saw it was a message from Tony.

No matter how much he wanted to ignore the
son of a bitch, they were still players of the same game, even if Tony had a
sudden impulse to alter the rules from time to time.

Something was going have to give soon
enough, but Xan was not ready to pull the plug on the club and his old mentor
just yet. And even if he were, it was obvious Tony was not letting him go
without a fight. As much as Xan loved nothing more than a good brawl, this one
wouldn’t involve fists.

Tony was too smart to try something as
literal as that, he thought.

For now he gave the date and time of Xan’s
next meet, roughly two hours after he informed him he was back in play.
“Anxious much to see my ass kicked?” He smirked wondering who his opponent was
going to be.

He wouldn’t mind it to be Dorian Carrey aka
Gray because as much as the guy became nothing more than a pawn in Tony’s hands,
he was still responsible for Dragon’s injuries. Knocking him down a notch or
two and letting him taste the defeat and pain seemed only fair.

While payback was definitely a bitch, it
was also a great tool of revenge if one knew how to wield it well, Xan thought.

He glanced at his wristwatch, deciding they
could spare an hour more for shopping before they had to head back and get
ready for tonight.

He couldn’t wait to see Catalina’s reaction
to the whole setting, wondering what it was about her that was lulling his
inbred wariness, allowing him not only to entertain the idea of showing her his
world, but actually
doing
it.

When she emerged from the fitting room, he
forgot about the time they had left, his next fight, and the fact she was
dangerous to him on a level he had never permitted anyone close to before.

The way she filled the dress rendered him
speechless and everything in him tightened in want.

He gestured with his finger for her to turn
around and when she did, the dress danced around her in a way that was as sexy
as it was innocent.

Just like Catalina herself, he thought, and
stood up, straightening slowly to his full height.
“So, what do you think?” She asked with a smile but it slowly faded away after
she caught his gaze. “Xan?” Waves of uncertainty in her voice crashed into him,
yet he didn’t care about anything but touching her in this exact moment.
“Come here,” he rasped and saw her swallowing nervously, but even that didn’t
stop or sway him.

He gripped her wrist, pulling her back into
the fitting room and shutting the door closed.
“What do I think? I can’t
think
at all, Cat. I just want to
feel
you,” he murmured.

Xan’s arms locked around her, but this time
it was Catalina who swept her tongue along his lower lip before suckling it
into her mouth.

She had never acted with a similar boldness
but then the look in his eyes burned her skin in a heated caress and the dress
did the rest. It felt like its owner should be brazen enough to handle a man
like Xan.

He groaned now and pressed his body
aggressively against her, just as his lips pushed down hard on hers at what
could be considered a silent order for her to stop teasing him and fully open
her mouth.

When she didn’t heed it fast enough, his hand
rose up to clench in her hair, tilting her head which would allow him to deepen
the kiss. His abdomen was ridged with muscles which tensed in reaction when she
laid her hand on it. Cat gasped when his hand closed over her breast, making
her forget time and place they were in.

Xan wanted to rip the dress off her body so
there wouldn’t be anything separating them any longer, and he was a breath away
from indulging himself when he felt Cat’s teeth joining the play.

His hands shot to the back of her thighs
gripping them and lifting her.
“Wrap your legs around me, Kitten!” He ordered roughly and this time the
playful note was no longer present in his voice.

It made her hesitate but he nipped at her
neck.

“Now!” His hands were strong and calloused
– a
feverish brand on
the naked skin of her legs.

His fingers crept higher to the thin
barrier of her panties, ready to rend them to tatters.
“Xan…”

 That’s how he wanted to take her, Xan
thought, when the sexual need held him in a vise-like grip.

Against the wall.

Impersonal.

Without waiting any longer, without all
those confusing thoughts and emotions she was inspiring in him.

But her voice trembled when she whispered
his name and he could hear notes of anxiety in it.

That reminded him.

She was a virgin and as far from a nameless
and mindless fuck as one could get. That pissed him off again because it was an
unwelcome reminder how untouchable she truly was to someone like him.

Yes, he could have her right now; her body
was responding to him heedless of all the differences between them and all the
reasons why she should have stayed away from him in the first place.

But she deserved better than a mechanical
coupling in a fitting room, sure as hell better than him for that matter.

For the first time in his life, Xan did
something that went against his wishes and wants, putting other person ahead of
himself. He let go of her thighs, letting her shaky legs slid down his hips.

Torture on its own.
“When?” He wasn’t as selfless as to let her go completely.

His eyes found hers and pierced her with
the echo of hunger still shadowing their green depths.
“Soon, just not like that,” she whispered.
“No, not like that. I need a whole night with you, not a few stolen moments in
a public place. This will have to wait for another time.” He winked at her,
acting as if backing down wasn’t against all that he was and didn’t cost him at
all.

She gripped his face in her hands as if
sensing the truth, no matter if he wanted her to know it or not.
“Are we good?” Cat looked him straight in the eye wondering if he was
withdrawing into himself or if it was her imagination at work, but there was no
answer in his gaze, not so much as a clue even.
“Yes. Let’s get out of here before I forget about your V card again. The outfit
is perfect; we will take it.”
“
I
will take it. After all, ultimately, I am the one who will wear it.”
“
Ultimately
… I am the one you will take it off for,” he replied and she
found no witty reply for that.

CHAPTER 24

Catalina put her red lipstick aside,
noticing a slight tremor to her hand. She knew it wasn’t caused by the vastness
of the unknown as far as the evening ahead of her went.

No, she was still affected by what happened
between her and Xan in the fitting room.

She didn’t think she would ever look at a
changing room quite the same, especially considering he basically told her that
public places were fair game in the future.

After he relieved her of the
‘V card’
that is, she thought, and made a face at herself in the mirror.

There was no doubt in her mind that sex
with Xan was going to be one of the most intense experiences of her life, and
that was the part that kept stopping her whenever she thought herself ready to
be with him.

He was the most driven male she had ever
met and it was the side of him she admired plenty, but it was losing its
momentum when she considered it a feature utterly focused on her.

She needed Chloé, but after her words today,
she wasn’t sure asking her advice was the right thing to do. Not when she
already made it perfectly clear she considered being with him a mistake on
Catalina’s side.

Cat didn’t see it like that… obviously, but
even if it were to turn into one
–
wasn’t she entitled to commit a few, just
like everyone else?

It was like replaying a refrain of the same
song accompanying her since childhood over and over again.

The unfairness of it all made her want to
rebel right away.

She wondered, what made people believe normal
rules didn’t apply to her and they always expected more of her? And fine, by
people
she mostly meant her grandmother, but Florence made too big of an imprint on
Catalina’s life to disregard her along with her opinions.

“Face it
–
you are on your own,” she told to her
reflection and left her bedroom as soon as the doorbell sounded.

She had already seen him wearing a suit and
a tie, but it still managed to surprise her and clench her stomach at the same
time. The suit was black this time, paired with a shirt of the same color and a
red tie.

She wondered if the small colorful accent was
his response to her red dress.
“You clean up nicely.” She smiled up at him making him chuckle.
“That’s something coming from you. But don’t make the mistake of thinking that
fancy
is my new goal.” He bent his head to kiss her lightly on the lips. “Ready?”
“As ready as I will ever be, considering the fact I have no idea where we are going
and what to expect.” She sighed and set the alarm, trying to understand where
his words about fancy came from.
“Where does that leave space for a surprise?” He raised his eyebrow.
“I am prepared better when I am aware of the nature of said surprise,” Cat said
with such seriousness he couldn’t not laugh.
“You know it doesn’t make any sense, right?” Xan felt the need to ask although
he understood the need to know himself.

Surprises were fine and dandy, but avoiding
something he considered a wild card was even better. He was just surprised they
saw it the same. What kind of bad surprises could someone like her expect? He
frowned and barely stopped himself from asking that very question. But he knew
that once this Pandora box opened, it would be impossible to control.

He had other plans for tonight.
“Well, I told you we are stepping into the world of the mostly rich but not
necessarily famous,” he reminded her, but she just shook her head.
“I understood you are taking me to see a game,” she looked at him when they
took seats in his car.
“I am; now Catalina… tell me you didn’t take your camera with you.” He glanced
at her and she was about to laugh but caught the somber expression in his eyes.
“Don’t have one that could fit in this tiny purse.”
“No funny business tonight, and stay close to me,” he warned.
“You are scaring me Xan.”
“You are fine, but those people play high and take it seriously… want to back
down?”
“No, I trust you know what you are doing,” she stated, and he thought that he
had never noticed what a big gap separated
trusting someone
and
trusting
them to know up from down
.
“Are we going to the Hollywood Park Casino?” She couldn’t stop herself from
asking.
“And what do you know about it?” His lips quirked at the corners.
“The Pavilion offers the best values on banquet facilities in L.A. and it can
be a good choice, not only for charity events but also… private poker
tournaments.” She glanced at him from the corner of her eye and this time he
laughed openly.
“Stop fishing. But no, this is not the place… although you are on the right
track with the private poker tournament thing, and this is the last you are
going to hear from me.” His big hand landed on her thigh in an intimate
gesture. “Am I going to get lucky tonight?” He wanted to know, letting his
fingers stroke the delicate skin of her leg.
“Play your cards right and we will see.” She tried not to show what his touch
was doing to her but she knew she was fighting a lost battle already.
“You should know better than to challenge me like that, Kitten,” he chuckled
enjoying this innuendo with the woman who was nothing but cool and unruffled on
the surface.

That was his initial impression of her, Xan
remembered, and he didn’t think he had ever been more glad for being wrong than
in this case.
“Not my fault that to you everything sounds like a dare.” She smiled sweetly at
him and felt his hand gliding higher… higher still, until it slid under the
fabric of her dress.
“Spread your thighs Cat.” He murmured wickedly and she wondered how could he
control the car with one hand and… her with the other one at the same time.
“This is not behaving Xan,” she answered, determined not to give in his every
whim. “Are you ready to risk it and go… all in?” She sucked in a breath when he
gave a little teasing push.
“All the way in, Kitten; are you ready to fold?” He wanted to know.
“Careful, I might call you on it and make you show your hand.”
“Ah, but I like where my hand is right now,” he said smoothly and she laughed.
“You are unrepentant.”
“I don’t play on one team with regret.”
“Maybe because you are not a team player at all?”
“It will be my pleasure to prove to you otherwise.” The look he gave her was
unambiguous.

Catalina just shook her head and slapped
his hand away.

“Shutters on the Beach?” She looked at
where they stopped. “It’s a romantic getaway, not a place to gamble.”

The hotel was located directly on the sand,
within walking distance of Santa Monica’s biggest attractions such as the Pier.
“That’s the thing. Nobody would have suspected it,” Xan agreed. “Is there any
place you haven’t been earlier to?” He asked curiously.
“I didn’t stay here; I just had dinner in their restaurant One Pico once or
twice.” She shrugged as if it were the most natural thing in the world while hardly
anyone could afford it, Xan thought.

For some reason, he purposefully kept
forgetting about her wealth and class, and the small reminders felt like
unexpected punches to his solar plexus.

The fact he was here with her tonight was
irrelevant.

He could afford it
today,
but the
place was as far from the filthy dump he grew up in as one could get. Xan
didn’t finish any fancy schools, didn’t have an impressive title before his
name.

All he had were his fists that helped him to
survive.
“You are hurting me,” Cat complained and he realized he squeezed her hand too
hard.
“I’m sorry.” He stroked her soft upper-class hand with his calloused finger,
thinking that hurting her one way or another seemed inevitable.

But he was carrying on with gambling as far
as the two of them went, determined to enjoy their time together to the
maximum.
“Let’s go, Kitten.” He pulled her toward the entrance and then led her to one
of the Presidential Suites.

She would have thought the Beach House
Suite to be a better choice, but it was her first time so she assumed she had a
lot to learn about the subtleties of organizing the perfect background for
illegal activities.

The door was pushed open before they could
knock on it and a very big scary looking man in a well tailored suit gave them
once-over.
“Yes?”
“Alex Thorpe,” Xan said, and the man stepped aside, letting them enter.

Catalina wondered if her imagination was running
rampant again or if she did see a gun holster strapped under his arm indeed.
She started to comprehend what Xan meant by saying those people were taking
their game very seriously.
“Am I nothing but a pretty ornament on your arm?” Cat whispered and an instant
later found herself under the shelter of Xan’s said arm.
“Pretty much. I didn’t think you would appreciate having your name on their
list,” he informed her coolly and she had to admit she was impressed by his
casual way of addressing even the smallest detail of the whole situation.

She had been fighting her entire life not
to be portrayed as a pretty doll, but in this case it was nice knowing she was
being taken care of, she thought.
“Who do you know here?” Cat asked as they walked deeper into the 1300-something
square foot building.
“Tristan Channing, he is one of the high-rollers. A game doesn’t usually
register on his radar if the ante-up starts below twenty five,” Xan told her.
“Bucks?” She glanced up at him and Xan threw his head back and laughed.
“You are adorable, Catalina… thousands baby. Twenty five thousands… bucks.” He
leaned and kissed her.
“Oh.” She felt silly and completely green like the color of the hard currency.
“Is he here?”
“Yes, the one in the white shirt with the shit-eating grin on his face.” She
looked in the direction he pointed and saw a dark blond-haired male surrounded
by a few women and what she assumed were other players.
“Do I dare to ask how you two met?” She tapped a finger on his chest.
“Ah… let’s say he wasn’t that popular at the time,” Xan said vaguely and her
curiosity ratcheted.

They were just a pair of gaunt boys trying
to learn the rules of the street and survive, he thought, but who would have
believed them now? People always saw what they wanted to see, what suited them most
at any given moment.

Was the woman next to him any different?
Xan wondered.

Would she look twice at a hungry kid on the
street or did her charity not reach quite that far?
“I think he spotted us,” Catalina said, pulling back his attention from the
wrenching memories of his early age.
“He sure did,” Xan murmured and shook the other man’s hand when he approached,
but the guy just laughed, hugging Xan and slapping him on the back.
“About time you came down to see me, my man.”
“As if you don’t know where to find me,” Xan replied. “Catalina, this is Tristan.”
He placed his hand on the small of her back.
“I am pleased to meet you.” She smiled and offered him her hand but instead of
shaking it as she expected him to do, he changed the grip and kissed her knuckles.
“The pleasure is all mine; now please come join me at my table,” he invited and
her smile widened.
“I would be happy to, but I am just watching and learning today.”
“Smart and beautiful, it’s incomprehensible you are wasting your time on him.”
He pointed at Xan and Cat laughed.
“I forgot to warn you about Mister Sleek here, Catalina,” Xan smirked and Tristan
laughed.

They were nothing alike, Cat decided, but
the bond between them was pretty obvious, at least to her because she had spent
her entire life watching people interact. They behaved like friends who felt at
ease with each other, without any need to impress one another.

Tristan was nearly as tall as Xan and
athletically built as well, although he was more lean than muscled. He seemed
as well-mannered as every other male she came across throughout her life, but
there was something predatory in his blue eyes.

His clothes were undoubtedly tailor-made
and the Rolex on his wrist was one of the latest models, but he had the same
rough-around-the-edges demeanor as Xan, even if better hidden under the veneer
of civilization.
“Tristan, where did you disappear to?” A woman’s voice purred, interrupting Cat’s
musings.
“My apologies babe, why don’t you show Catalina the powder room, hmm?” He
suggested and Cat understood it wasn’t really a request.

No matter how much it grated to be treated
in this way, she decided to smile and act as if it didn’t bother her in the
least.

After all, she was a guest in his house, so
to speak, and his rules applied.
“Follow me.” The other woman looked at Catalina with a plastic smile on her
artificially enhanced lips.

She flipped her peroxide-blonde hair over
one shoulder until it was teasingly touching her bottom with her every step.
Her body was walking, talking advertisement of probably a pricey plastic
surgeon, and she was very talkative indeed, Catalina decided.

She kept talking the whole short walk to
the powder room, pausing from time to time for a dramatic effect. Cat wasn’t
sure, but she would swear the woman said her name was Barbie and she had to
bite the inside of her cheek in order not to laugh at what she considered a
very adequate name.

At some point she stopped listening to her
companion altogether and her voice blurred into only slightly irritating
background music.