Authors: Selene Chardou
We separated only further enough to look into one another’s eyes. One of his hands still held me by the waist possessively, and the heat from his body filled mine with reassurance and warmth.
“How did you…when did you come?”
“It was supposed to be a surprise though this isn’t exactly what I had in mind. What happened?” he questioned, his voice sincere yet filled with worry.
“My mom and I had a perfectly satisfying dinner at Spago but we discussed some things, and she assured me she had it handled. I guess it didn’t go like she thought. She crawled into her sports car drunk and crashed into an embankment. All of this is my fault you know,” I explained before the tears began to fall again.
“Why would you say something like that?” Finn wondered as I grabbed a few Kleenexes from my Birkin handbag and dried my eyes.
“What we discussed at dinner…and the incident between Etienne and I…my mother never gave him permission for anything…he was just bluffing. She didn’t want him to touch me at all.”
Finn stepped back as his crystal blue eyes glared at me in an accusatory fashion. “What are you talking about, Evie?”
“I slept with Etienne…about a month ago. It was awful and I feel terrible it happened at all. I couldn’t tell you on the phone because I thought that would be the worst way for you to find out. I have been so broken up about the whole incident I haven’t been able to stay at the guesthouse.”
I watched as his gorgeous eyes went dark as he took yet another step away from me like I was suddenly a leper. “I’m sorry. I guess I am a little thrown but when did this happen?”
“I told you almost a month ago.”
He ran his hands through his hair and looked down before his eyes met mine again. “I can’t believe you couldn’t tell me this over the phone. All those times we spoke and…you never said
anything
. Did you plan to tell me at all?”
My attitude changed as well. “I didn’t think it was appropriate to tell you over the phone but if it would have prevented this attitude you have towards me then I would have told you.”
“I can’t deal with this right now—”
“Now wait a minute!” I exclaimed in anger as I grabbed his left forearm and held him in a death grip. “We aren’t even a full fledged couple again because I wasn’t ready for it before you left but I am…now. I don’t love Etienne and I won’t have anything else to do with him. Please don’t do this to me now. I need you—more than I have ever needed you in my life. Don’t abandon me for God’s sake, I am
begging
you!”
Finn snatched his arm from my grasp. “I told you I can’t do this with you right now. I am so disgusted. How could you profess to love me, and allow another man to touch you? Don’t give me some bullshit about you being lonely because I missed you more than you could ever know, and I managed to stay faithful.”
He began to walk away, paused and turned back to me. “I know you wanted to go there, and you planned it the whole time, no matter who got hurt in the process. I am beginning to feel like you don’t love anyone as much as you love yourself. What you did to me proves it if nothing else does. Don’t call me or attempt to contact me. If I decide to forgive you, it will be on my terms, not yours.”
I watched as he walked away from me, and I began to sob again. Not just quietly but stomach-quenching, aching cries that caused me to seek out a bench to sit down. I grabbed more Kleenex and blew my nose as the tears continued to stream down my face.
What had I done and most importantly, was our relationship still salvageable at all?
F
inn climbed into his Mustang. He still couldn’t believe what Evie had told him and for the life of him, he had no idea why he was taking it so badly. She’d made a mistake but she’d also changed for the better. She really did seem like she was ready, willing, and able to dedicate herself to him.
Why had he treated her so cruelly? Without an ounce of sympathy if that is what he truly believed? Perhaps it was because this time she would have to prove to him she was worth fighting for; he couldn’t keep trying to convince her.
Her tears tore at his heart in a painful way he couldn’t quite understand but he also knew deep down he was doing the right thing. His timing sucked because her mother was in the hospital but like she didn’t think it would be a good idea to tell him over the phone. Her feelings were not his concern at the moment despite the amount of grief she was going through.
She’d made her bed, and with the way he felt, she could lay in it too. He knew she was in love with him but she needed to truly believe that. Their relationship could no longer be had strictly according to her terms. She would have to put on her big girl panties, and become the woman he knew she was capable of being but that would only happen if he made her suffer.
Every choice a person made in life had consequences, and though Finn knew many thought he had taken the easy way out with dealing drugs, it was fast money but drug dealers didn’t have long shelf lives, and usually died way before their time.
He and Brandon had discussed it. Since Rich refused to trust any other dope runners, they would continue to supply him only. This seemed like a hardship but it wasn’t. He only had to make a trip back east several times per year, and that was it.
No muss, no fuss.
He knew without a doubt Evie might give him somewhat of a hard time but she had met the guy. She had to know it was in his nature to guard what he thought belonged to him, and for a very long time, Rich regarded Brandon and Finn as “his.”
Finn immediately drove back to his apartment and promptly aired it out before he managed to take a shower, dress casually in a pair of black stovepipe jeans, a Marilyn Manson concert tee-shirt and a pair of black Converse with white socks hidden underneath his pants legs.
Afterwards, he stopped by Monika and Dylan’s again, and somehow knew Evie wouldn’t be there. Monika busied herself by getting ready for her afternoon classes while Finn aggressively questioned Dylan on how much he knew about what was going on with Evie.
“Listen, man,” Dylan began in a sober voice, “she told us what happened but she was all broken up about it. The man took advantage, and
she
is the one who is truly in pain right now, not you. Why can’t you give her another chance? It happened once, and it was a mistake. Aren’t we allowed to make mistakes or must we be as perfect as you?”
“You know I am far from perfect, Dylan, but what I am supposed to think? She’s gonna seek out an itch every time she needs a scratch? I need to believe I can
depend
on her—”
“And you can!” Monika exclaimed as she walked into the living room. “You have no idea what it was like for her when you were gone. She fell apart and that
bastard
manipulated her. I found her huddled in bed, and if I didn’t know any better or she hadn’t convinced me—
barely
—that what they had was consensual, I would have called the police and had his ass arrested. He did a number on her and all she knew was she never wanted it to happen again!”
She stalked toward him and stood over him, her hands set on her slender waist. “You, Finbar Reilly—of
all
the people in the world—should be the first to be able to forgive her for what she did. Yeah, she didn’t want you to know over the phone. Is that such a big fucking deal? She knew you would freak out, and if it were up to me, she never would disclosed it to you at all. But she also remembered what
you
did to
her
, and she believed if she could forgive you for that then you would do the same.”
“What are you talking about?” he shouted back.
“The blowjob incident at Trevor’s house—does that ring a bell? Yeah, she told Dylan and I about that. If you could humiliate her like that then why can’t you forgive her? You know how much she has been embarrassed by the incident between Etienne and her already. Give her another chance or so help me God, I will find a way to
end
you.”
“You’re bluffing—”
“You think so? Well just go ahead and try me. I only know some of the most influential people in this lousy town and…oh yeah, I’m Hollywood royalty—Evie is my best friend. I will make the name Finbar Reilly mud, and if you have any designs about reviving your drug business here, which would be quite lucrative, I will make sure you won’t be able to get product let alone a clientele. So you just go ahead and try me. Forgive Evie or you might as well leave town now because she doesn’t need to be reminded of your miserable face if you refuse to be with her.”
Finn sat back and knew he had no choice. He had planned to forgive her but it was fun to watch Evie stir in her own juices for a while. Unfortunately, Monika had forced his hand, and he had a feeling he would have to act sooner rather than later.
She’d proven a formidable enemy to anyone who did Evie wrong, and that was a tough pill for even him to swallow.
A
lthough my mother was in the hospital, I still kept up my school obligations and did everything that was expected of me when I wasn’t spending every other waking moment by her bedside.
The various operations had gone well especially since she’d cracked several thoracic vertebrae bones, broke the femur in her left leg along with her right ulna and had a hairline fracture to her left wrist.
She was still sleeping peacefully and the doctors assured us it was not a deep coma. Her life was not in any danger because her health was very good. Although my mother smoked occasionally, and she had her secret bouts of out of control drinking every now and then, she was also an exercise fanatic who practiced not only Pilates but also took kickboxing and Zumba classes five days per week at her exclusive, private gym on the estate. She had her own instructors and nutritionists on call, and they all coordinated a meal plan for her to follow once her hospital stay was over.
After my brisk talk with Etienne who threatened to pull the plug, I promptly informed my father who brought in his high priced attorneys, and had my mother’s assets frozen so her husband could not make a late night escape with anything but the clothes on his back.
Amaani came by and prayed over my mother in a strange Arab dialect that was Islam, and Monika also visited with Dylan several times. She assured me everything would be fine with Finn but if that was the case then why hadn’t I seen him? Why hadn’t he called or at least texted or emailed me?
He was completely ignoring me and I hated it.
On Wednesday, Halloween afternoon, shortly after I returned from UCLA to Cedars-Sinai, Artemis jogged down the hall in a pair of five-inch Christian Louboutins, and embraced me. I was enveloped in the deep, rich musky scent she wore but I welcomed the human contact.
We separated and she held me at arm’s length. “Your mother is awake. She’s talking to your father right now so I wanted to give them some alone time but…she’s going to be okay.”
I reached over and kissed my stepmother’s cheek. I only wore lip-gloss but I still wiped the slight smudge from her cheek. “Thank God. I was so worried everything wouldn’t be all right and…this is the best news I have heard in ages.”
“Not quite, love.” She interlocked her left arm with my right and we continued to walk down the hall. “There is a surprise…for you. A dashing young man with the most adorable Irish accent is asking about you.”
My heart leapt, I smiled brightly as we rounded the corner, and we almost ran right into Finn. He balanced a tray of Starbucks and sat down. Artemis sat to his left, and I sat to his right. “Here is your tall Earl Grey tea, my dear, with milk and two Sugars in the Raw; this one is for Rolf…a grande Caramel Macchiato…”
Artemis grabbed both drinks, kissed Finn’s cheek and whispered, “Cheers, love. I’ll leave you two lovebirds alone.”
We watched her as she walked down the hallway, and disappeared around a sharp corner.
Finn handed me a hot beverage. “It’s your favorite. A grande White Chocolate Mocha without the whipped cream…so, no, I didn’t forget. I grabbed just a regular tall drip with cream and two sugars for myself.”
I sipped from my drink and closed my eyes as all the tastes that lit up my mouth but none would ever be delicious as the sight of Finn, and his crystal blue eyes staring at me so intently.
“It’s perfect,” I began before I set my drink down on the hospital floor near my chair. “However, it can’t possibly be as wonderful as seeing you again. I’ve missed you so much. You have no idea how crazy I have been going. It has taken all the sanity in me to continue my life as usual because if I stopped for a moment, I would start to cry about you and my mom. I couldn’t do it and you will never know how much I am so sorry I hurt you. My God, it wasn’t intentional at all. If it makes you feel any better, I hurt myself so much more than I ever hurt you. I can’t say I’m sorry enough, babe—”
Finn grabbed my hands and held them in his. “You don’t have to keep apologizing because I am fookin’ eejit, Evie. I let my stupid pride almost come between us and for what? Nothing at all because it’s happened, and now all we can do is move on. I love you so much and I want to marry you. I know this isn’t the best time to ever do something like this but I’m hopin’ in your moment of weakness you’ll say ‘yes.’”
He set his drink down and cupped my face with both his warm hands. “Your mother is out of her coma, and I really do adore your family. Your stepmother is a hoot, and your father is very dry, very stern but he loves you so very much. All this time you were thinking no one gave a damn but don’t you understand how much you were pushing all of
them
away? You’ve gotten very good at it…since the birth of Kieran. They aren’t the enemy so do me a favor and stop treating them as if they are.”
The tears came again and I embraced him before I whispered in his ear, “I will, I promise. I’ll stop treating my parents like shit.”
“You better plan to keep that promise.” Finn reached into his pocket and pulled out a black velvet box. “But first…will you, Elvira Sandstrom, do me the honor of becoming Mrs. Finbar Edward Reilly?”
I smiled through my tears and I nodded my head profusely. “Yes, I will.”
“Good.” Finn took out the ring, a simple white gold band with a small princess cut white diamond. It was modest but I wouldn’t have expected anything else from him. “Now, this doesn’t mean we have to do this next month or next year. If you need a long engagement, and would rather finish university before we tie the knot then you can do just that. I want to know you are mine and we’re no longer on hiatus. I have lived long enough to know I will never find another like you, and if I am completely honest with myself, I don’t want anyone else but you.”
“Neither do I,” I responded before I kissed his lips.
They tasted like coffee and mint; they tasted like Finn.
As we separated, Finn grabbed our drinks before he disposed the cardboard carrier into the trash, and we walked to my mother’s room in ICU.
Artemis had joined her husband, and the three adults were joking before they made room for us.
“Mr. and Mrs. Sandstrom, Mrs. Fournier…I wanted to let you all know I asked for your daughter’s hand in marriage, and she has said yes. I know she’s still young—there’s no rush so I am willing to give her the time she needs but it would really make me feel better if I had your blessings,” Finn announced in a nervous voice.
“Did I hear my best friend was getting married?” a female voice inquired before Monika and Dylan walked in.
She embraced me and Dylan patted Finn on the back. In the corner of my eye, I could see Etienne slink into the room, and eventually he made his way over to my mother’s bedside.
He grabbed mom’s right hand gently and said, “That is great news, Elvira. You two make a lovely couple.”
My mother whispered, “You have my blessing. I only want you to be happy.”
“Thanks, Mom,” I said and blew her a kiss. She knew why—the thought of being near my stepfather gave me the creeps, and I wasn’t ready to deal with him yet.
“Your father and I have discussed this and we agree as long as you remember to visit us when you come to London, you have our blessing. Don’t be strangers. If the weather is truly awful then we can meet at the beach house in Cyprus. You two will love it there. It’s absolutely beautiful,” Artemis explained in an enthusiastic manner.
“That your stepmother and I have agreed upon.”
I embraced my father and hung on tight. He responded with a knee-weakening hug of his own while I closed my eyes and inhaled his scent. He was my daddy once again, and not just a sperm donor stranger. The thought was exhilarating.
After various conversations with my family, Finn and I finally left. We said our goodbyes to Monika and Dylan in the parking lot before we drove to his place. It was there we made love and afterwards, lay in one another’s arms in post-coital bliss.
“I love you, Finn. I adore you so much, it’s criminal. No matter what you do, don’t you ever scare me like that again,” I whispered before I kissed his lips ever so softly.
“I won’t.” His crystal blue eyes looked deeply into my eyes. “Don’t you ever cheat on me again…is that a promise?”
I nodded my head. “Yes, it’s a solemn vow.”
“Good.”
I rested my head on his chest and sighed out loud. Our lives were just beginning and the possibilities were endless. It gave me renewed strength for the future and a clear, thought-out feeling that no matter how many times life let me down, as long as I had hope, the future would never be bleak.
Ever.
And that was not only a good quality to have but it also made me feel like there was nothing I couldn’t do if I set my mind to it. The world was my oyster and I’d just seen my first glimpse of the gorgeous pearl inside.