Darcy's Temptation (19 page)

Elizabeth looked at the clock once again. How many hours would it take for her husband to return to Pemberley? The night without him lasted forever. She tossed and turned, trying to find a comfortable place to sleep; yet, the bed was the same one she shared with Darcy. The difference lay in his absence. How had she come to so depend on him for her existence? She needed Darcy as she needed air. She sat at her embroidery, but her mind drifted to the man she loved. Elizabeth felt him today, and the feeling brought her little comfort. She put her needlework down and walked to the window to look out over the grounds of the estate, the home he loved. Darcy wanted her here with him.

Hugging herself and trying to still the fear creeping into her heart, Elizabeth whispered his name, “Fitzwilliam,” before closing her eyes, hoping to capture his image. “I miss you, my Husband,” she mumbled to the emptiness of the room. Elizabeth swayed, thinking of his arms around her and the endearments Darcy offered when he held her near. Finally, she turned back to find something to pass the time. Maybe she would write a letter to Jane; sitting at Darcy's desk would ease her longing. She crossed behind the furniture, striding purposely to the door when suddenly a pain—a sharp, penetrating pain —brought her to an abrupt halt. She clasped the back of her head, swooning from the pressure radiating through her.
Images of Darcy flashed before her eyes as flames of a candle flickering in the wind. “Fitzwilliam,” she screamed as the blackness overcame her.

 

The smelling salts pulled at Elizabeth's consciousness. “Mrs. Darcy,” she heard Mrs. Reynolds's voice. “Can you hear me, Mrs. Darcy?” A cool cloth gently touched her face, teasing Elizabeth's eyes open, blinking several times to force her senses to respond.

“Elizabeth?” Georgiana's face appeared above hers. “Elizabeth, are you all right?”

Elizabeth fought hard to make clear her immediate thoughts.“Where is Fitzwilliam?”

“My brother is not here. Do you know what happened, Elizabeth?” Georgiana tried to lift Elizabeth's head from the floor.

“Georgiana, we must find Fitzwilliam.” Elizabeth pushed herself up as the urgency rushed into her voice.

Georgiana tried to assure her. “My brother is in Hull, Elizabeth.”

“No,” she demanded. “He needs me. I heard him call my name. Please believe me; Fitzwilliam needs me.” She clutched at Georgiana's hands.“We must go to him; we must help him.”

“You fainted, Mrs. Darcy.” The housekeeper supported Elizabeth to her feet as the mistress stood gingerly. “Mr. Darcy is away, but he will return in a few days.” Mrs. Reynolds helped her to the nearest chair.

The panic set in; Elizabeth looked at each of them with eyes enlarged by the fright. “Do you not understand? Fitzwilliam needs me. He is in pain. I felt his pain. Please help me, Georgiana,” Elizabeth pleaded.

“My brother is fine, Elizabeth.” Georgiana took her hand.

Elizabeth sat down dejectedly. How could she make them understand? All her reason told her Darcy would return in a few days, but something of her fear remained. She looked
about, finally forcing a smile to her face although the feeling of dread did not leave the pit of her stomach. “Of course, Fitzwilliam is well,” she said the words, trying to convince herself of their truth.“I do not know what happened.”

“Shall I send for Mr. Spencer, Madam? Is it the child?”The woman's loyalty to Pemberley caused her to think of the heir Elizabeth carried.

“No, I am fine; there is no need for Mr. Spencer. I just overextended myself once again. I assure you I am well.” Elizabeth strained to persuade them of her health while still feeling an emptiness only Darcy's presence could fill. “Please, I will be fine; I simply need a few moments to recover my balance.”

“Let me help you to your rooms, Mrs. Darcy,” Mrs. Reynolds suggested.

Elizabeth stammered,“Maybe I will lie down for awhile.”

She allowed the Darcys' trusted housekeeper to help her to her sitting room and bedchamber, and although she put on a happy face, she could not escape the apprehension that clutched at her heart. As she lay across the bed, clasping at the embroidered pillow, Elizabeth allowed her eyes to close. “Stay with me, Fitzwilliam,” she whispered.“Do not leave me; come home to Pemberley. I am here, my Love.” Tears welled in her eyes, and silent sobs soon racked her shoulders.

 

For the next few days, Elizabeth forced herself to go through the motions of being Pemberley's mistress. She and Georgiana visited several of the tenants; she had fittings for new dresses. Now, with her condition, Elizabeth needed additional items, but her heart did not participate in these activities. Her heart wanted Darcy home; then everything else would be important once again.

Elizabeth stood for hours watching the lane leading to Pemberley, knowing Darcy would return sometime in the next couple of days. She wondered why she had no word from him;
Darcy would send an express, but Elizabeth heard nothing. So, her eyes searched the lane, watching for Darcy's coach to return. “Please, Fitzwilliam,” she whispered to her reflection in the window.“I need you here, my Love.”

Jane Austen,
Sense and Sensibility
, 1811

On the sixth day of Darcy's absence, an express post arrived. Elizabeth assumed it was “from” her husband, but then she realized it was “for” her husband. She took the letter into his study, debating whether she should read it. Finally, she reasoned Darcy planned for her to act in his stead so she broke the seal and set down at his desk to read the missive. Immediately, Elizabeth's hands began to shake and she gasped, holding one of Darcy's handkerchiefs to her mouth to stifle the sound.

What did this mean? Fitzwilliam went not to Hull after all. How was that possible?
The dread she experienced the last few days made it hard for her to swallow.

Elizabeth flipped quickly to the second page to peruse the information contained within. She still felt confused.What did all this mean? Her husband never met with Hannah More as he planned, and she heard nothing from him. Her mind raced with what to do next. Without thinking, she rang for one of the maids.

“Yes, Madam,” the woman appeared instantaneously.

“Have Mr. Howard attend me at once,” Elizabeth demanded.

“Yes, Madam.”

She returned to her reading.

Elizabeth's eyes scanned the paper again; she could barely breathe. Darcy had not arrived in Hull—that was apparent from Hannah More's letter. Plus, Miss More's correspondence indicated some serious facts about Captain Rutherford, all of which she needed to discuss with her husband.

Mr. Howard's appearance at the door interrupted Elizabeth's thoughts. “Mr. Howard, I need for you to go to Hull as soon as possible. Mr. Darcy did not arrive as expected; I fear something bad happened. I will write out a note to Miss More while you make arrangements.”

“Of course, Mrs. Darcy,” Mr. Howard's concern came at once. “I will take some men with me; we will leave within the hour.”

 

Georgiana appeared at the door of the study. “Elizabeth, I was told there was an express. . . . ” Georgiana's words froze in the air, seeing Elizabeth's distraught look. She rushed to her sister's side. Kneeling in front of her, Georgiana begged, “Elizabeth, what happened?”

Elizabeth handed Georgiana the letter, unable to answer out loud. Georgiana snatched the letter and read it quickly. “My Goodness!” Georgiana exclaimed.“What do we do?”

“Mr. Howard took several men; he left for Hull moments ago,” Elizabeth answered as if not comprehending.“I gave him explicit directions to send word immediately.” They sat in complete silence for a few minutes, each engrossed in what they thought. “Georgiana, where could Fitzwilliam be?” she whispered the words.

Georgiana knew Elizabeth needed a reasonable answer, but, try as she may, she could offer her sister no solace.“My brother must be all right.” Georgiana said the words as much to convince herself as Elizabeth.“He had trouble with the coach, or Fitzwilliam took his business elsewhere. Anything could happen.” Georgiana's words poured out. “But nothing is wrong.” Tears misted her eyes.

Elizabeth reached out and pulled Georgiana to her. “Oh, Georgiana, what will we do?”The fear of losing Darcy encompassed her; sobs of anguish smothered her.

Georgiana allowed her own tears to flow. “Fitzwilliam is all right,” she repeated. “My brother is all right; he will be home soon.”

Over the next three days, Elizabeth and Georgiana rarely left the house.They stood for hours watching the lane heading to Pemberley, hoping Darcy's coach would appear.

“Fitzwilliam has been gone ten days,” Elizabeth said out loud, although she spoke to no one in particular.

“He will return soon,” Georgiana responded.

They had multiple conversations of a similar nature since receiving the letter from Miss More. One moment they felt absolute despair at the possibility Darcy may never come home; the next moment they knew he must be safe.

 

The solitary figure of Clayton Ashford traveled the lane to Pemberley on a regular basis to visit with Kitty Bennet, but today he struggled with what he must do. “Mr. Ashford,” the maid announced.

“Show him in,” Elizabeth answered from behind Darcy's desk. With her husband away, it was the only place she felt his presence. She could not dare to think of his absence from her bed so she focused on the study from where he did all his work.

“Mrs. Darcy.” Ashford made his bow upon entering the room.

“Good morning, Sir. I am afraid my sister has not come down to breakfast.You are a bit early today.” Elizabeth offered the vicar half a smile.

“I did not come to speak to Miss Bennet,” he said solemnly. “I came to speak to you, Mrs. Darcy.”

Elizabeth froze, afraid of what he might mean. “Mr. Ashford, your tone tells me this is not a social call.”

“Mrs. Darcy, please come and sit with me.” He ushered Elizabeth to a nearby chair.

Elizabeth stammered, “You frighten me, Sir, with your seriousness.”

“There is no way to say this without bringing you hurt.” He heard Elizabeth gasp. “An urgent express came this morning from Mr. Howard. He asked me to bring you his
news for he feared you might require my comfort upon hearing it.”