Dark Diary (27 page)

All she wanted to do was kill. I knew the feeling well and it was an impossible temptation to ignore. Humans are so easy to find.

Flashes of blinding white light skittered through my brain
and I cringed, wrapping my fingers around my head and growling in response to the sudden intrusion. A piercing scream filled the night air and I was quick to head in the direction of it, following the echo through the alleyways and straight to its source.

I found Kathera.

My arrival drew her attention away from the young girl
within her grasp and her eyes flickered with contempt. I wasn’t
there to steal her prey, nor to pick a fight with her, but our bond was still too new for her to sense that.

Ve’tani had accepted and even praised me when I had started killing, and the blood from Kathera’s victim had already begun bewitching my taste buds. My instincts were churning to get a piece for myself and my will was being tested.

The girl was no more than fifteen—still a child. I should have guessed that
Kathera’s first would have been an adolescent. The purity of their blood is apparent to our
heightened senses. The younger you are, the cleaner your blood. Ve’tani had trained me well in the art of blood tapping and Kathera was following in our footsteps against my will.

It was screwing with my head—all of the blood. How was I supposed to control her when I couldn’t even control my own wretched desires?

Kathera ignored me long enough to dig her fangs into
the girl’s throat and put an end to her cries for help. The struggle
was brief. Her lips dripping with the young one’s life, Kathera turned to me again and froze.

“Come…”

It was as if her eyes were speaking the words her mouth did not.

All of the blood… She wanted to share it with me.

My instincts begged me to take part in her madness.

I couldn’t.

My silence made her furious and she clenched her teeth and hissed as I tried to approach.

“Stay away from me,” she growled, finally speaking in words again.

“Kathera!” I reached out to her.

Her head cocked to the side and her eyes narrowed.

“I am
not
Kathera,” she replied with a scoff. Her voice was thickly accented old Irish. She stood up from the corpse and straightened herself. “Stop following me.”

That voice…

It was Kathryn.

The teenager’s body was limp on the ground and Kathera
nudged a stray arm with her foot so she could walk past.

“You can have what’s left, if you wish,” she snarled.

I was at an utter loss for words. I stretched my fingers toward her and stumbled over myself trying to form a sentence.

“Ka-Kathryn?”

It was all I could manage.

She had already turned her back on me, but she stopped in her tracks and I noticed her fingers twitch.

“If you cannot gain the courage to join me as what you are, then do not follow.” Her voice resonated with unmistakable hatred.

“You have to stop. Kathryn, please!” I set off into a fast
walk to get to her, but she noticed my movement and growled
furiously.

“I am not yours to command!” She turned her head just enough to shoot me another sinister glance of piercing blue.

“Do you not remember me?” I said, raising my voice enough to cover the distance between us.

This time, she turned completely to face me.

Her lips were stained with blood and her shirt, again, soaked with fresh patches of deep red.

“I remember you,” she said. Her tone was spiteful. “And I remember very well what a coward you are. You are weakened by your need for human blood and yet you avoid it. You are covered with the stench of the animals whose blood you choose in its place.” Kathera’s eyes narrowed again and she lowered her head slightly in confrontation. “Do you enjoy the struggle? Is it worth it, Matthaya? I can feel you inside my head—your thoughts pressing me to resist this hunger.” She wiped the back of her hand across her lips and then rubbed it clean on her jeans. “I will not. Why not give in to it and join me in embracing the rage you are truly capable of?”

I couldn’t gather the sense to reply.

For a moment, I regretted the decision I had made to become her Sire, but there was no way to change the past. I
didn’t know what to say. She wouldn’t even listen to me. How
could I possibly save her from the darkness that was smothering her mortal soul?

I cleared my throat and tried to fight the dark imagery Kathera was projecting into my mind. She was mad with horrible, blood-drenched visions of death and power and I had to shake them before I, too, fell victim to the hunger again.

Kathera turned her back to me once more. I’d hardly uttered another word before her hand rose flatly against the wind in a gesture of disregard.

“Save your breath for the pigs you worship,” she said.

And before I could say anything else, she vanished into the darkness.

It amazed me how quickly she could move. I
was nimble with
my wings, but her speed on foot surpassed mine. I probably
could have caught up with her had I
really
tried, but there was no use.

She needed help.

I
needed help.

Was Kathera trapped inside her own mind? How could my innocent Kathryn have been possessed by the darkness so quickly?

V
e’tani could answer these questions for me, but I didn’t
even know where to begin to find
her
.

Would she even help me?

To think that Ve’tani and I had been linked for hundreds
of years and now, I couldn’t detect the slightest sense of her presence. It was odd, awkward, and unnerving, now
that Kathera’s darkness swirled within me. I had hated Ve’tani for
so long, but not even she had tainted my mind with such fervent impulses.

I had done horrible things in my first several years of the curse
, but I had hoped Kathera would be different—that maybe she could have controlled it if I had willed her to.

I wandered alone in the night for several hours, accompanied only by the light of the moon and the horrible guilt that plagued me. I cringed at the strange rushes of color and sound as they pierced my mind, brought on periodically by splashes of blood being drawn by Kathera’s hands.

She had killed another…

My lip quivered with the urge to call out for help.

I had to try.

“Ve’tani!”

My voice echoed through the shadows.

I called out again.

Silence.

Having had no reason to stay, she was probably long
gone by now in search of a new companion who could satisfy her discerning tastes.

The soles of my shoes clicked against the sidewalk as I continued to walk through a dimly lit alleyway. Each victim filled my mouth with tastes I had not experienced in ages. I
wanted to escape them, but there was no way to shut her out.

“Having second thoughts?” A scratchy voice came from above and I turned toward it.

I looked up toward the roof of a nearby garage and found
Ve’tani perched near the edge, the hem of her robe dangling down from the gutter as she bent over to meet my gaze.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk, Matthaya.” Ve’tani leapt off the roof and landed gracefully on the ground in front of me with a muted thump.

I was shocked she hadn’t left yet, and even more surprised
that she had responded to my pleas. I was almost—God forbid I say it—relieved to see her.

Almost.

“You came?”

She nodded cockily and grinned. “I came merely to observe,” she replied with a nonchalant shrug. “It seems your
little girlfriend is putting quite a dent in the population around
here.”

“How do I stop her?”

Ve’tani laughed.

As cold as ever.

“There is nothing you can do to bring her around,” she said.

“What? There has to be a way.” I clenched a fist. “Do not lie to me, Ve’tani.”

She crossed her arms. “You have to let her come back of her own accord. She has to find herself.” Her head tipped to the side and she scowled at me. “And even if I could help… you betrayed me.”

“You made me your slave!” I growled. “You stole me away from the life I had; you never asked me if I wanted this. If anyone was betrayed, it was her! Now she’s trapped!”

“You’re lucky you are a Sire,” she sneered, glaring at me with her yellow-gold eyes. “Else, she would be dead right now! You
should
be thanking me.”

“Damn you, Ve’tani!” I moved closer to her. “I’d kill you if—”

“If what,
Matthaya?” Ve’tani hissed, her teeth bared, her lips saturated by a splash of bloody saliva. She licked her
lower lip and then growled beneath her breath. “If you weren’t
so weak, Matthaya? If you weren’t so… afraid? Go ahead and try!” she mocked, curling her fingers toward herself as her lips stretched into an excited grin. “You’ve
forgotten something, Matthaya: I made you what you are.”

“And you’ll pay for it.” My fists tightened.

“
I
gave you your rage.” She smirked. “
I
gave you your fire. You would be nothing without the power I gave you!”

“That’s a lie, Ve’tani! This power means nothing to me. You ruined my life. You destroyed what I could have been.”

“Destroyed? Harsh words." She let out an uncalled-for cackle and pointed matter-of-factly at me. “I saved you from the tiny speck of a worthless existence you would have had without me.”

The edges of my folded wings scratched nervously at my shoulder blades and tingled with apprehension as I plotted
my next move. With our connection finally severed, I wanted
to end her right then and there.

“You never had a chance with that little Irish girl, anyway,” she added.

“Don’t you dare bring Kathryn into this!” I pulled off my coat and threw it to the ground, allowing my wings to break
open unhindered. The joints snapping into place invigorated me
, emphasizing my physical advantage over her.

She circled me, my steps mirrored hers in defiance, and my wings flexed.

“You can’t kill me, Matthaya. I am much, much older than
you. Do you think this is the first time one of my
creations
has turned against me?”

“What are you saying, Ve’tani? That I’m not the only one
like this?” She stepped closer to me and I twitched, fighting the urge to take off her head with a swift crack of a wing, but her words piqued my interest.

A lanky hand attempted to trace along the top arch of my left wing, so I flapped it backward and out of her reach. “You may think a few centuries is a long time to live,” she started, “but I’ve lived much longer. Years before I made you, I made another who was nearly as strong.”

I didn’t believe her.

“Where is he, then?”

“
She
,” she corrected, “is dead.”

I gritted my teeth and bared my fangs with a snarl.

“I tore off
her
wings… and destroyed her. Just… like… that.” She snapped her fingers and flicked her head to the side, throwing her shaggy blond tresses back.

“Why?” I asked. The brutal killer in me yearned to lash out and I imagined my nails pressing into her throat.

“Because she was more powerful than me and because she wanted to be the only one with that power. Don’t think I won’t do the same to you if you get in my way again. We are no longer bound by the formalities of our kind, Matthaya. My patience with you has worn thin.”

I scanned our surroundings for an alternative way to get
to her and listened closely to the ambient noises around
us. Kathera’s doings still flashed in and out of focus, provoking my old bloodlust to overcome me. I
had
to relax or I’d risk letting it possess me again.

Ve’tani sighed audibly and deliberately. “You disappointed
me. I wanted you to be so much more.” She turned her back.

I lunged for her.

My hands latched around her sides and my nails dug furiously into her ribs as I jerked her body toward me. Blood
flowed down my fingers and she choked. It was the first time
I had ever sensed fear in her.

“I will never be like you, Ve’tani!” I growled close to her
ear, pulling her in and running my nails deeper into her flesh
until they were stopped by rib bones. She groaned and shoved backward into me. Something rigid knocked into my chest.

It can’t be.

I swerved my wing in front to keep her from escaping as I released one hand and brought it up against the curve of her back. The tips of my fingers traced over a hard protrusion in her lower shoulder blade. I moved to her other side and there,
on her other shoulder blade, was another rough, jagged stump.

Ve’tani, too, had wings—or had had them at one time.

What could have been powerful enough to take them away from her?

While I ruminated on the thought, she pulled away and cowered—her hands embraced her shoulders as if she had been raped of her dignity.

“Ve’tani?” I’d never seen her so vulnerable, so naked with
humility. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I was more curious than angered.

She straightened up and cleared her throat, dusting a flattened hand anxiously down her cloak.

“We all have our secrets, Matthaya.” She averted her eyes
from me.

With a shrug and a grimace, which she tried to hide, she slunk off into the darkness.

Speechless and awestruck, I was hesitant to follow.