Darkness Arisen (31 page)

She looked over at him, realized he was watching her, and smiled...a smile so beautiful it made his heart stop.
I'm so glad you're okay, Ian. It was worth it.

I'm never worth that kind of sacrifice, sweetheart.
But even as he said the words, he reached for her, drawing her into his arms for an embrace. As he buried his face in her hair and felt her body melt into his, he couldn't stop looking at Kane's goofy-ass grin. A child? A family? With Alice? Really?

"Son of a bitch." Ryland's explosive epithet had them all spinning around. He was standing at the end of the woods, staring into the trees that had been burning so fiercely before.

"What is it?" Ian's mace burned in his arm, and Kane called out his flail.

"That pit you guys jumped over." Ryland turned to face him, his eyes blazing. "It's the same exact thing that took Thano." His eyes flashed. "Thano's here. He's fucking here. I know it."

Adrenaline rushed through Ian, and he strode over to stand beside Ryland. The pits that had nearly taken him and Alice were still there, bottomless holes of purple, green, and black smoke. "Thano got sucked into one of
those?
"

"Yeah. Almost got me too." Ry went down on one knee, peering over the edge. "Thano!" he bellowed. "Can you hear me?"

There was no response.

A long silence filled the night as all three warriors reached out with their minds, trying to connect with Thano telepathically. If he was near, they'd be able to reach him. If he was far away, only a warrior he was blood-bonded with could reach him, and none of them fit that bill.

Ian didn't pick up anything from Thano, and from the frustrated expressions on his team's faces, Ian knew they'd come up short, too. Ian grimaced, studying the seething cauldron below them. "You think he could have survived that?"

Alice walked up beside him, setting her hand on his arm. Ian instinctively pulled her against him,needing the physical connection with her. "It's not Catherine's trap," she said. "It's not death. So, he might have a chance."

"Catherine?" Ry looked up sharply, not bothering to rise from his knee. "Your sister? Her trap is death? What does that mean?"

Alice hesitated, and Ian knew she was retreating to her old self of holding back and playing by the rules.

"Alice." He took her hand. "What the hell does it matter if you contradict precedent now? There's no going back. You broke the rules by giving me that golden light. You've gone too far. It's time to do whatever the hell you want to do. Being safe gets you nowhere. You know that."

"But—" Alice started to protest, and then she stopped as Ian's words registered. She slipped her hand into her pocket and felt for the pearl that was protecting her, the pearl she would have to give up when they returned to Jada. What did it matter if she broke the rules now? She'd killed a woman. She'd given Ian the golden gift. Ian was right. There was no salvation for her.

A strange sense of liberation began to flow over her. After a lifetime of trying to play by rules that she hated, rules that stole from her everything she wanted to be, she'd crossed that line. She'd used the golden light on Ian, a light that was supposed to be preserved and offered only to someone who represented a greater purpose than themselves. Ian was simply himself, and she'd done it anyway.She'd never be able to go back, no matter how she tried to atone for what she'd done. She could only go forward, and make the most of what she had. To be free.
Free.

Fierce determination flooded her, and she clenched her fist around the pearl as the reality of what she'd done settled on her. Yes, she would still die. Yes, she might be trapped as a Mageaan without the pearl to protect her, but right now, in this moment, she was free. Truly
free.
She smiled, a small smile that grew.

Ian grinned back, though there was no mistaking the worried shadows in his eyes. "Freedom," he said.

"Freedom," she agreed. She strode forward to the edge of the pit and crouched beside Ryland. "Catherine Taylor isn't my sister," she said. "She's my best friend, but not my actual sister."

Ry's pitch-black eyes were fastened on hers, as if he were riveted by her words. "What is she?"

"An angel of death."

Ryland's jaw flexed, and he closed his eyes, as if the news was more than he could handle. "An angel of death," he whispered. "Just like the oracle said."

"Oracle?" Ian crouched beside them. "What oracle?"

Ry's eyes opened, and recognition flared through Alice once again. Ryland was more than a Calydon. He was more than Order of the Blade. Something that rang a bell...

He stood up, breaking eye contact and moving out of range before she could place it. "Thano is here," he said. "And an angel of death." He called out his machete. "We need to find them both."

Kane was staring down into the chasm. "It really is exactly like the one that took Thano. I thought it had been made by demon magic."

"It is demon magic," Ian said. "Demon magic controlled by Warwick Cardiff, a black magic wizard. He's here. And if you saw the same pit before, then he must have created that one, too."

Kane looked up, his eyes glittering with fury. "Warwick Cardiff? Who is he?"

Ian felt a flash of triumph. Kane and Ryland were giving him their full attention now. For the first time in six hundred years, they were on board with his mission. "He's a wizard who harvests demon magic. He's the one who cursed my ancestor for killing his
sheva.
If he was the one trying to kill Kane's
sheva
, then he's the one targeting the Order. Not just me. The entire Order."

Kane ran his hand through his hair. "Why would he target the Order? Whoever is trying to kill our angels is after the Order." He gave a grim smile. "I get why he'd be pissed about his
sheva
getting killed. I'd probably go after you guys too if you killed Sarah. But why the entire Order?"

"I know why." Alice spoke up, and all the men turned to look at her. She was looking at Ian, and only Ian. "You all make choices in accordance with your Order oath. If it didn't drive you, you would be free to make the right choice—"

"The Order choice is the right choice," Ian interrupted. "I honor my duty—"

"Exactly!" She looked around at them. "Warwick believes that the oath the Order members take obscures their ability to do the right thing." She looked at Ian. "Didn't you say that Warwick's best friend was your ancestor? But that Augustus put his Order duty over their friendship?"

Ian nodded. "He did what was right—"

"He did what the Order oath convinced him was right." She looked around at the three stoic faces. "Don't you understand? Warwick is trying to free all of you and future Order members by destroying the Order, by giving heroes the freedom to think for themselves instead of playing by the rules."

Ryland's scowl deepened. "He wants to destroy the Order to free us? Fuck that." His fist tightened on the machete. "The Order is sacred. Dante's mission will be upheld by those carrying his torch."

"Sacred? Like murdering
shevas
to protect their males?" she challenged. "Would you really kill me if Ian and I finished bonding and he went rogue? Protect the greater good by killing me?"

Ian growled and moved in front of her as Ryland scowled. "If you are part of our angel trinity," he said, "then no. Ian would be the one to die. Protecting the Order assets to protect Dante's legacy is all that matters. Ian is one member. You protect us all. You are more important."

She blinked. "You would kill your teammate in cold blood?"

A muscle twitched in Ry's cheek. "I do what I have to, angel. It's what I live for." His eyes darkened. "Don't look for what I'm not," he said. "I don't give a shit about anything but making sure Dante's legacy is protected."

Kane studied him. "And angels," he said. "You care about angels."

Something flashed across Ry's face. "Our guardian angels, yeah. Because they're part of the fabric of the Order."

"No. Not just them," Kane challenged. "Any angel. Why?"

Ry's face darkened. "I honor Dante. Nothing else matters. If Warwick is trying to bring down his legacy, then I'll stop him."

Alice groaned in frustration. Didn't they understand what she was talking about? "What about the fact you're following the rules to kick Ian out of the Order, when you both know he's one of the best warriors you've ever had, and one of the most loyal?"

Guilt flashed through Kane's eyes. "We do what we need to do. He made his choice."

"Seriously?" She looked at Ian. "And what about how you're unwilling to help me kill Catherine because your first job is to find Warwick and end the curse because you owe your ancestors this great honor? All you think about is honor, and not the situation."

Ian's face darkened. "Are you trying to say that I should walk away from my oath to the Order and my family honor?"

Alice hesitated, knowing that those two things were what defined Ian. They were what had been driving him his whole life. The resistance on his face made her heart sink. She would never be most important to Ian. Just as her mother had always been more interested in angel activities than her own daughter, Ian would never put her first. Suddenly, the love that had blossomed so brightly in her heart when she'd offered him her golden light seemed to flicker and die.

None of the men standing before her would put their women first. Their first love was the Order. Blind, mindless adherence to traditions formed two thousand years ago. Fury boiled through her, anger that she'd finally broken through her boundaries, and yet these men were too stubborn to do the same. God, she almost understood why Warwick wanted to break them up. She understood, because she had been bound so deeply by rules for so long, and her mother had died for it. If she'd become brave earlier, her mother might still be living. With the pearl in her possession, who knows what she could have done? Instead, she spent her life hiding. Now, she had only days left to live. Well, dammit. She was going to make the most of those last days.

"Wait a second." Ryland held up his hand. "Did you just say you're here to kill Catherine? You're here to kill the angel who might be the third part of our trinity?"

Alice hesitated at the threat in his voice. "I'm here to do what I promised her I'd do." But as she thought of Catherine, she felt a vast warmth spread through her, a beautiful sensation so pure and amazing she wanted to cry. She'd always said she loved Catherine, but suddenly, for the first time in her life, she felt it in her heart. It was so powerful that it almost overwhelmed her. She knew it was so vivid because she was no longer fighting what she was, or allowing the strictures of her kind to rule her. Catherine was the source of support and friendship and family that had kept her heart beating her whole life, and suddenly, for the first time, she could feel, truly feel, how much Catherine meant to her.

She didn't want to kill her. She didn't want to lose her. Dear God, she didn't want to.

"What did you promise her you'd do? Kill her?" Ryland pressed.

Alice took a deep breath, recalling that moment when she'd made that promise to Catherine, and she knew that no matter how badly it tore her up to do it, she had to make it happen. She owed it to Catherine to do what Catherine couldn't do herself. But as she studied the dark denial in Ryland's eyes, she knew that he would never allow it. "Catherine asked me to rescue her," she said evasively. "So, that's why I'm here."

"By killing her?" he asked.

She didn't need to answer him to know that she'd just acquired an enemy. Instead, she lifted her chin and faced his challenge. "What if killing her was the best thing for the Order?"

He said nothing, and she saw the conflict warring in his eyes. As loyal as Ian was to the Order, Ryland was even more intense, almost rabid with his commitment to their deceased leader. But so was his connection to angels, despite his denial. Which would win?

"I think," said Ian, breaking up the moment. "We need to find Warwick. He has answers all of us need. Let's start there."

For a long moment, Ryland didn't move, then he gave a curt nod. "Agreed."

Kane inclined his head. "Agreed."

Ian looked at her. "Alice?"

There was no need for her to find Warwick. His spell had already been cast on her. There was nothing that could help her now. She was there for Catherine, and only Catherine. But as she looked around at the determined trio, she knew that there was only one answer to give at the moment. "To Warwick," she said. If they got to Warwick, he would lead her to Catherine, and Catherine was what mattered.
Dear sweet Catherine, why do I have to find my love for you right before I have to kill you?
There was no answer from Catherine, and no answer from anywhere else. Would she rather have never felt this, or felt it and lost it? She knew the answer. Even a minute of being alive was worth all the pain that came with it. "Let's go."

She met Ian's gaze, and she couldn't help the feeling of loss that echoed through her. The brand burned on her arm, mocking her. She was his soul mate, but she would never trump his code of honor. She'd given her soul for him, yet his would never be offered in return.

But as she turned away, he caught her arm, pulling her back.
Alice.

She resisted the personal intimacy. "What?"

I will find a way to do it all.
The fierce determination in his voice caught her attention, and she looked up.
To do right by you. You will not end up in the ocean or in demon hands. I swear it.

His stare was intense, his jaw flexed with conviction. There was no doubt he meant it, and her heart fluttered at his promise. He'd uttered the words from the depths of his soul, imbuing them with the beauty of true emotions. God, to have him look at her like that, as if his world would be right only if she was okay... it was incredible. A gift. Even if, in the end, he wasn't able to do it.

She knew why she'd given him the golden light. His intense loyalty and commitment to family honor was so admirable and so beautiful that she couldn't help but treasure it. Ian had shown her how to break her bonds and follow her own heart. He'd given her freedom, and for that, she would never regret her choice, even if he would never love her the way she wanted to be loved. "Better to have lived and lost," she said softly, "than to never have lived at all."