Read Daughter of Albion Online
Authors: Ilka Tampke
As she stroked my arm she found the bandage around my fight wound. Wordlessly, she unwrapped it. âWhy do you bandage this perfect skin?'
I looked down. My arm was unscarred. Already my knowledge was receding. Without answering, I rested my head back on her chest. Perhaps I would have to accept that this seed was not destined to fruit. I could speak of it with no one in Caer Cad. There was only one to whom I could confess my journey, and I had vowed not to enter the place where he waited. If I wished to meet with Taliesin again, I would have to find a way to call him to me.
Early next morning, I was returning with bread when Neha streaked ahead, darting behind the kitchen. A hare? I wondered. There was a flood of barking before she bounded back, snapping at my skirts and bidding me come.
âI don't want to see your kill,' I chided, shooing her away.
But she kept up her barking until I followed.
When I turned into the narrow pathway behind the kitchen, it was not a hare carcass I found, but Heka, sitting on her haunches with a torn piece of linen and a small pot of beeswax on the ground before her.
She looked up at me, her face triumphant. Across her lap, one hand rubbing its blade and the other grasping its handle, lay my bronze sword.
My fingers tightened around my basket. âHow did you get this?'
âCah asked me to order the store pit and I found it hidden there. I thought it was so pretty I would clean it. For its lucky owner.'
Neha yapped relentlessly at the weapon.
âHush!' I hissed, crouching before Heka. âHas anyone seen it?'
âNo,' she said. âI kept it out of sight as I wanted to attend to it myself.'
âNot even Cah, who bade you?'
âOnly me. Why do you ask? It could not be yours.' Her feigned innocence chilled me. âSwords cannot be held by those without skin.'
âYou know that it is.' How did she seek and find what was most precious to me?
Footsteps passed just beyond the curve of the kitchen wall. âGive it to me, Heka, and speak of it to no one.'
âFor what reward?' she said.
âWhat is your price?' I spluttered. âCoin? Food?'
She leaned back against the kitchen wall, savouring her moment. âCoin, for now, enough that I need not find work for a moon turn or two,' she said, âand some of the honey cakes that Bebin has just put into the oven.'
âYes, yes,' I gasped, giddy with relief that the sword would not be exposed.
She stood, letting it fall to the ground, and kicked it toward me.
I stared at her, confused by her trust. âHow do you know I will honour my promise?'
âI do not like you,' she said, âbut I know that you are true.'
I snatched up the sword and stowed it beneath my shawl. âWait here until I can procure Cookmother's purse,' I said. âAnd when you have coin will you be gone from this kitchen?'
âFor now,' she said. âUgh, you bleed!' Recoiling, she pointed to my arm.
I looked down. Fresh blood streamed down my elbow. The cut had opened again.
âA fight wound!' Her eyes blazed.
âNoâ¦' I said. âA carving wound.' With my hand pressed around it, I hurried away, calling Neha to my heel. I had to be on my guard with Heka. She was cleverer and more poisonous than I had realised.
Pain is not evil. Nor suffering. Nor death.
The only evil is moral weakness.
The strongest weapon against it is knowledge.
Learning is the root of all virtue.
T
HE SUMMER HARVEST
came. I did the same work I had always doneâthe milling and storing of the Tribequeen's grain, the fleecing of sheepâbut I was not the same woman. I was feigning contentment, sitting by the fire each evening with my worksisters, attending their riddles and gossip, when the whole of my being yearned to proclaim what I had learned.
I became practised at wearing the sword, releasing it deftly as I undressed for bathing, disguising it in my skirts and refastening it by touch, so that no one could see. It stayed bound to me always, even as I slept.
My hunger for skin endured, sharpened. With skin, I could be trained to journey to the Mothers with full sanction. With skin I could return Taliesin's skinsong. The swordâwhich rubbed my thigh to rawness, to weeping sores, then finally thick callusesâwas useless without skin.
It was one moon after midsummer. I was sweeping the floor of the grain hut when I heard the bell announcing visitors to the Great House. At the sight of the horses tethered outside, I flew to the kitchen.
âQuick, give me bread and an ale pot,' I commanded Bebin, brushing clean my skirts. âUaine and Ruther are returned!'
Bebin loaded my tray with loaves and a jug and bade me send Uaine to her when their business was finished.
The benches in the Great House were draped in gleaming, sky-hued fabrics, fragrant with spice. Boxes spilling with gems were spread over the silks and Fraid sat tall in a white gossamer shawl, clusters of green stones cascading from each ear. âAilia,' she called, âcome and help me with these trinkets.'
Sitting by the fire, his hair cut short and face shaved like the merchants of the First City, was Ruther. His eyes turned to me as I entered, yet bluer against his sun-darkened skin.
I set down the tray and walked to Fraid, feeling Ruther's gaze hot upon me. Uaine was beside him, and opposite them both, with no interest in the eastern finery, sat Llwyd. He smiled briefly as I passed.
Fraid held up her mirror as I fastened a snake-shaped clasp around her neck. âThese are beautiful, Ruther.' She turned her cheek. âHow does it stand at the coast?'
âThey are ready to sail,' said Ruther. âThis is why we return. We have passed close to the Roman camp, and learned much of their intent.'
Fraid put down her mirror. âWe know they wish to subdue Caradogâbut surely they do not look to the peaceful tribes?'
âIt would be false comfort to think so,' said Ruther. âThey want the isle of Albion in its entirety. This is Claudius's goal.'
I stood behind Fraid, staring at Ruther. Was it only I who read the trace of excitement beneath the concern in his face?
Fraid motioned me to unfasten her neckpiece. âWe are not his war trophy.'
âBut he would have us be,' said Ruther. âAnd this, I know, is not all, Tribequeen.'
I sensed the blood quickening under Fraid's skin as I unclasped the metal.
âSpeak,' she said.
Ruther's gaze flickered to me before returning to Fraid. âDurotriga is of particular interest to the General Plautius. Our tribelands are fertile and rich in metal.'
Fraid paused before responding. âI don't see how any of this can be true,' she said. âThere have been several riders from the east telling us that Plautius commanded them to embark but they were too terrified of our tides and would not board their ships.'
âSuch a mutiny occurred, yes,' said Ruther. âBut the Emperor sent Narcissus to stand before them. He is a great speaker. He countered their fears with reason. They are once again ready to sail.'
âWhen?' asks Fraid.
âWithin days.'
She stared into the fire. âSo it is war.'
I stood, motionless behind her, watching Ruther's eyes jump from her to Uaine, then back again.
âIs this the only way, Tribequeen?' said Uaine carefully.
Fraid looked to him. âClearly you think not. Speak.'
âIf they are seeking to expand their territory, it is to their advantage for local leaders to remain in place,' said Uaine. âRome will offer client kingships, generous kingships, to those tribekings who do not oppose them.' He paused. âMany of the eastern kings are already planning such negotiations.'
Was it the draft from the doorway that made the hairs on my neck rise?
âThis is not the way of the Durotriges,' said Fraid.
âWait,' Llwyd raised his hand. âWhat would this mean?'
âForemost an arrangement of revenue,' said Ruther. âTaxes paid to the Empire in metal and slaves and an allegiance to Claudius. Beyond this, freedom. To live as we have always done.'
I startled as Llwyd broke into a loud laugh.
âDo I amuse you, wiseman?' said Ruther, frowning.
âI laugh at your knowledge of freedom,' said Llwyd. âTell me, by what laws do we live in these client kingships?'
âFor the most part, tribal law is upheld.'
âBut ultimately?' said Llwyd.
Ruther's lips tightened. âWe would be held within the protection of Rome.'
Llwyd nodded. âWithin the Empire, laws are strictly enforced, are they not?'
âThe penalties for disobedience are indeed strict,' said Ruther. âThe law is strong.'
âAnd upon this law rests the virtue of Roman citizens?'
âYes. For fear of death,' said Ruther.
I shifted on my feet, sensing the conflict seeding between them.
âAnd yet the city is strewn with criminals,' said Llwyd. âI hear they run like rats in a drain. Fouling the water.'
âThere is virtue and order in the city of Rome that Britain is yet to know,' said Ruther, bristling. âGreat cities cannot be built upon chaos.'
âI agree,' said Llwyd. âChaos will always prevail.'
Ruther frowned, shaking his head. âI am lost by your Journeyman's reckoning. Speak plainly, wiseman, if you wish to be understood.'
I flinched at his treatment of his journeyman Elder. There had been a hardening in him since I last saw him.
Llwyd rose and stood closer to the hearth. His skin was made smooth, youthful, by the firelight.
âAs you know well,' he began, âin this isle of light we live by the laws of skin.' He fingered the sprig of mistletoe that hung from his belt. âThose who truly know the laws will love them. The order of Albion is freely consented. Taught. Not enforced. Whoever does not comply by their own judgment is not virtuous, but captive. Teach what is true, then allow each soul its choice. This is freedom. This is virtue.'
And what of those who cannot learn? I ached to ask. Where is their freedom? Where is their virtue?
âThank you,' Ruther's voice was cold, âfor your illumination. But wise words will not win a war. Tribequeenâ' he turned to Fraid, ââdespite these compelling discussions of freedom, the Romans will come, and we will fare better if we meet them with some willingness to make terms. If we resist them, they will take their desire by forceâand on that count we cannot match them.'
I stared at him. This was not the warrior's way. There was something he sought to gain in this.
Fraid turned to Llwyd. âI have heard your protest, Journeyman, and understand it. Still, Ruther's advice must be considered, if the legions do indeed reach our borders. Do you agree?'
Llwyd stood at the hearthstones, his voice low. âIf you submit us to their laws, Fraid, you will destroy us.'
âDo you rather we fight a battle we cannot win?' said Ruther without patience.
Llwyd lifted his face, his voice now strong. âWith the Kendra's blessing, we will win.'
Ruther snorted. âOf what Kendra do you speak?'
âShe will come,' said Llwyd.
âYou are waiting for the past,' said Ruther.
I gasped and Fraid hushed me.
Llwyd did not respond.
The room rang with the clash of their minds.
âI will summon the council to meet tonight,' said Fraid. âYou will attend, Ruther, and we will discuss the news you have brought.'
âAilia!' Ruther held out his cup. âI am empty.'
I took the jug to him. As I poured, he slipped his hand beneath my skirt, trailing his fingertips over my calf. Though I angered at his claim of me, my blood coursed at his touch. âThere is something else you must both consider in relation to the intentions of Rome,' he said to Fraid. In a moment he would know my sword. I pulled away and returned to my place.
âSpeak,' said Fraid.
âRomans do not judge their women as we do here,' said Ruther.
âYes,' Fraid scoffed. âI have heard they do not head tribes or fightâ¦'
âNor choose their leaders,' said Llwyd.
âNot publicly, at least.' Uaine laughed.
âThe wives exert power enough,' said Ruther. âBut not to command soldiers. I've heard them mocking the tribes that are led by queens: the Brigantes, the Iceni. And us. To their minds, these are weak targets. Easiest to destroy.'
âIf women are so poorly esteemed,' said Llwyd, âthen how is their knowledge heard in statecraft?'
âBeyond bedchamber politics, it is not,' said Ruther.
âThere are virgins,' countered Uaine, âthe Vestels, who keep the fires. They are always present at state ceremony.'
âVirgins?' Fraid snorted. âWhat do virgins know of the power of the Mothers?'
âLittle,' Ruther laughed. âIn this matter, the women of Britain are greatly superior. But we are already a target, due to the fortune of our geography,' he continued. âTo be led by a queen makes us yet more vulnerable.'
âSo you suggest a change of leadership,' said Llwyd, âto address this problem?'
âWithout doubt a tribeking would present a more daunting opponent to Rome,' said Uaine.
This man loved Bebin, I mused. How could he question the Mothers' strength? Was it Rome that infected him, or Ruther?
âIt may favour our hopes, Fraid,' said Ruther, âif you were to hand the leadership to another.'
Fraid's shoulders stiffened.
âFraid is our chosen consort to these tribelands,' said Llwyd. âDeeply loved.'
âI acknowledge it so.' Ruther bowed his head. âI think only of the tribe.'
âAnd who should replace me?' asked Fraid. âI have no sons. We both know my brother's temper is too poorly restrained.'
âPerhaps you suggest that we select from the other high warriors, Ruther?' said Llwyd. âOr their sons?'
âI make no campaign,' said Ruther to Fraid. âMy loyalty is sworn. I merely bid you think on this and exploit me, if it serves you. I have rank and friends in Rome. I am in a strong position to negotiate when I return to the east.'
None spoke.
My eyes were fixed on the plush hide at my feet. I was rocked by the pride in Ruther's petition and by the dawning reality of this attack.
âThank you, Ruther,' said Fraid, standing, âfor your information and advice. But I am Tribequeen of Northern Durotriga. Whether we fight them or submit, it will be under my rule.'
My heart swelled with love for her.
I returned to the grain hut after Fraid had dismissed me and it was here that Ruther found me when the day was late. He approached my turned back, winding his arms around my waist without a word of greeting. I knew him by the scent of his sweat and foreign cloth.
âCome walking with me,' he urged.
âI am not finished here.'
âYes, you are.' He pulled me by my hand toward the door. âI am sure I could have the Tribequeen's pardon if you need it.'
âAnd Cookmother's?' I snatched my hand away. âGain her permission and I will walk with you.'
He sighed. âWhere is she?'
âThe kitchen, I expect.'
âWait here then.' He strode out the door.
I swept the sheaves that had fallen to the floor. I had not expected Ruther's interest to endure his journey, and I had to find a way to tell him I was no longer free. My hope for Taliesin was fruitless, but the months of separation had not lessened my wanting of him.
Ruther pushed back through the doorway, smiling broadly. âYou have the Cookwoman's blessing to walk with me.'
I set my broom down, surprised. âShe's not let me walk for weeks. How did you gain it?'
âAs I always gain what I wish.'
I shoved his thigh with the broom end for his arrogance.
We walked through field lanes to Sister Hill, talking all the way. There was no danger of silence with Ruther. He regaled me with tales of mishaps from his travels. How Uaine's horse, weary with heat, and with full packs upon it, mud-rolled to cool itself in a bog and Uaine had to ride naked for a day while his tunic dried. How, lighting candles in their Roman guesthouse, their man attendant set his beard alight and had to douse it with the pisspot.
I laughed freely and it was easy between us, despite his long absence, despite another's claim of my heart.
As we climbed the slope our conversation quieted and I was sure he was remembering, as I was, the Beltane night we spent here. Breathless, we sat down at Sister's summit, looking westward toward the dusky township. The days were beginning to shorten and a cool breeze rolled up from the valley. Ruther leaned on one elbow to face me. âHave you been feeble with the want of me?'
I laughed. âNot in the slightest way.'
âGood then,' he said, ânor I for you.'
I glanced at him. âYou have cut your hair like a man of the Empire.'
âBetter in the heat,' he said. âYou prefer me with clansman's hair and beard?'
âI prefer you neither way. I only make an observation.'
Now it was he who laughed. âAilia, I've missed your tender ways.'