Dauntless (Sons of Templar MC) (34 page)

“Everything,” he rasped. “You’ve got everything left to give.”

I leaned back, my eyes not leaving his. I didn’t say anything to that; instead, I showed him what I had. My hands went to my bra, letting it fall to the floor. Then it was time for my panties. I sucked in a breath and stepped out of them.

There I was.

Naked.

In every way I could be.

And I was terrified.

My eyes met his. I was terrified, but I was safe.

I padded forward, my thighs on either side of the chair.

“Fuck, Becky,” Gabriel hissed.

I leaned down to his jeans to unbutton them, my hand shaking as arousal pulsed through my body.

He grunted when I freed him, when I stroked my hand down his smooth skin.

All the while I was looking at him, into the gaze that had turned feral with desire. I had to stay anchored with his eyes in order not to wander from that room. Get taken back into the past. So I kept his gaze as I lowered down.

“Becky,” he hissed. “Are you ready for me?” His voice was almost unrecognizable with desire, but the concern was evident.

He was worried. Because it had been a while and there had been no foreplay. But there had. I was primed.

“I’m ready.”

Then I lowered myself onto his lap, guided him inside. We both sucked in breath at the same time. My body both rejoiced and revolted at the intrusion. The feeling of fullness.

It was a battle between the pleasure and the pain. The wrong and the right. Because the corners of my mind danced with demons, with the feeling of filth that came with his intrusion.

“Becky?”

I blinked the demons away.

And I won.

Just like that.

I still felt filthy at the edges, but I could handle it. It mingled with the pleasure and gave me something new, something that was so good it was bad. So evil it was good.

“I’m good,” I whispered.

Then I moved.

And it was beyond anything.

Because I had control. I found it. I owned my body.

But Gabriel owned my soul.

The good, the bad, and the ugly.

“
R
evenge is never stupid
, darlin’. It’s the single most satisfying thing in the world.”

-JR Ewing

I
was driving
, so I didn’t pay attention to the number on the screen until I answered it.

“Don’t hang up” was the first thing Nat pleaded.

I was tempted, sorely tempted. One of the rules of the meetings Gage and I went to every week was not to associate with people from your old life. The toxic people. It was safe to say I hated rules, but this one kind of made sense. Hanging with the girl who introduced me to sex, drugs, and destruction wasn’t high on my to-do list. But I hesitated because, despite that, Nat was a friend. A kindred soul. She had her own shit she was running from. She wasn’t a bad person. Most drug addicts weren’t
bad
people. Mostly they were normal people who made a lot of bad decisions.

“Give me one reason why I shouldn’t,” I said.

“Because I know where Carlos is.”

I slammed on my brakes so hard I almost smacked my head on the steering wheel. Luckily there was no one immediately behind me or my shitty car most likely would have fallen apart around me.

I guessed that was why it was against the law to talk on the phone and drive. Made sense now.

I pulled to the shoulder and didn’t miss that my constant shadow did the same. I was surprised he didn’t rear-end me.

“What?” I hissed, once I was safely stationary.

“I know what he did to you and that your boyfriend’s club has pretty much scorched everyone who had a hand in taking you right off the face of the earth.”

She was right. I’d seen some of their handiwork up close and personal. Got my own hands dirty. With the good kind of dirt.

Things had calmed down a little since the whole car bombing thing, but everyone was on high alert. Gabriel called me about a thousand times a day, plus visited the club multiple times, despite the fact he had someone ‘on me’ whenever he wasn’t ‘on me.’ Which was, since that night, a lot.

I wasn’t entirely back to myself sexually, and the prospect of the cuffs still sickened me, but that didn’t mean I didn’t indulge in my addiction daily. Multiple times every day.

The cuffs were still used. It seemed my dominator sure liked me rendering him helpless.

I kind of liked it too.

I didn’t like being followed everywhere and having my whereabouts known every second, but Gabriel was concrete on that score.

Carlos and that Devlin guy were still on the loose, which pissed Gabriel right off. Understatement of the century. I wasn’t too hot on it either, but I was trying to live my life. The one I was just getting back. And actually liking.

So obviously this had to happen.

“And I hate him for what he did to you,” Nat continued on a whisper. “And for what he’s doing to everyone else.”

I didn’t miss how her voice shook. “Everyone else?”

“Yeah. He’s making sure all his girls are soliciting and hooked on drugs.” I heard a sniff on the other side of the phone. “He owns us, Bex. And I don’t want anyone to own me anymore. So I thought if I told you where he was, your boyfriend and his club….”

I didn’t miss her meaning.

“Where is he?” I snapped.

“Aimless,” she whispered, referring to the bar which had been my old haunt. “He’s only with one other guy. Tyson, I think.”

“Okay.” I was about to hang up when I stopped. “Nat, he doesn’t own you. Neither does that shit you put in your body.
You
own you.” And then I hung up.

I checked my bag for my gun.

Satisfied, I pulled back onto the road.

In the direction of Aimless.

He glanced down at his phone and shook his head. “No, Skid, you do not have to drink a gallon of Gatorade if Becky tries to make you. You have to wait until I’m there to watch.”

Gage grinned.

Since Skid had been tailing Becky and she’d been very vocal about how she felt about it, she made it her personal mission to torture the poor guy enough to run from her.

The opposite was happening. Lucky reasoned the fuck would still follow her around even if he stopped ordering him to.

She had that about her.

That spirit. It was coming back. Coming back stronger than ever.

The fact his wrists were slightly sore was testament to that. His dick hardened at the memory.

It took three words to chase that hard-on away.

“We’ve got trouble,” Skid yelled, obviously on his bike.

His blood ran cold and he burst up from his chair, spilling his beer in the process. “Where is she?” he demanded.

“Currently? She’s driving, and we seem to be going in the direction of Aimless.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” he roared. “Stop her.”

“Unless you want me to make her crash her car, I kind of can’t.”

“Fuck!” he yelled, swiping a glass so it shattered on the ground. “We’ll be there in twenty. Do not let her set foot in Aimless.”

He put the phone down and both Asher and Gage stood in front of him.

“We got trouble,” he declared.

Gage rubbed his hands together. “Good.”

The second I pulled into the parking lot, a bike roared in beside me.

Skid was up in my face as soon as I climbed out of my car.

I gripped the gun inside my bag. “Get out of my way, Jason,” I gritted out.

He didn’t move. “I can’t let you go in there.”

“You don’t
let
me go in anywhere. I’m a grown woman. I go where I please.”

“Yeah, but you going in there?” He nodded to the abandoned-looking bar. “It’s not smart.”

“I’m not smart. I’m angry. And an angry woman is dangerous. I don’t want you to bear the brunt of that, but I will shoot you in the kneecap if you don’t move,” I threatened, unearthing my gun.

He must have gauged my threat because he stepped back. “Fuck,” he muttered, pulling out his own gun.

I raised a brow. “I didn’t ask you to come in.”

He stared at me. “If I don’t, your old man is gonna shoot me, and not in the kneecap.”

I squinted at him. He was serious, and I didn’t doubt Gabriel might do it. “Well, I’m kind of fond of you, so alrighty then, let’s go.”

I didn’t think much as I was walking through the desolate gravel parking lot. In fact, I didn’t think at all.

It was empty apart from my car, Skid’s bike, and a black town car I recognized.

So I knew what to expect when I burst through the open door. Carlos, leaning against the bar, drinking from a glass and chatting with Tyson.

They both turned as we walked in and I didn’t even falter, just kept walking even as Tyson raised his gun.

There was a loud boom from beside me that had my ears ringing. Tyson crumbled to the ground.

I stepped over him with little effort, and, like I’d practiced it, lifted the gun and squeezed.

The glass in his hand smashed to the floor.

In the movies, revenge came to a big crescendo, a climactic moment full of the action and drama you’d been waiting for since it all started.

In real life, unsurprisingly, it’s a little different.

It was over quickly with little to no drama. Or action. I guessed it depended on the situation. It lasted twenty seconds. Less.

Shit, Carlos was still holding his glass when I shot him.

My shaking hand dropped the gun so it landed next to his body. The one missing half its head.

I shot him.

The sound still rang in my ears.

“Shit,” Skid whistled as he came to stand beside me.

“Yeah,” I agreed.

He stared at the slightly headless body I’d created.

“You ever shot anyone before?”

“Nope,” I said, making a soft popping sound on the
p
.

“Me neither.” His voice didn’t shake or anything, but there was an edge to it. The same edge I had to mine.

“I have killed someone before,” I continued casually.

“Oh yeah?”

I nodded. “But he deserved it.”

“So did he.” He nodded to the body.

“Yeah. He did.”

A heavy silence cloaked the room, not just the silence of death but of being the dealer of that death.

It didn’t feel nice. Or good. But I felt less… dirty. Cleansed, somehow. Which was ironic, considering murder wasn’t cleansing. It was a sin. And against the law. Though murder was concerning humans. I put down an animal. A feral one at that.

“Scott,” he said, the word harsh on the soft silence.

I turned my head to regard his profile.

He met my eyes. “That’s my name,” he clarified. “I figure it’s time you knew it, since we, you know, just killed people together.”

“Scott,” I repeated. “Are you fucking kidding me? I got it the first time. You nutcase, why didn’t you tell me?

He shrugged. “Was kind of funny. Hearing you come up with stupid names.” He paused. “And then after what
they
did.” He nodded to the body. “It seemed to distract you, kind of bring that part of you back, remind you of yourself. Couldn’t exactly take that away.”

Wow.

His name was Scott and he was awesome.

I reached out and grasped his hand, squeezing it. He squeezed back.

And… nothing. Nothing apart from his warm, slightly clammy grip.

No dirt. No ice. Just peace.

Then the doors burst open and the peace was shattered.

“Becky!” Gabriel growled, his voice low and dangerous.

Both of us whirled around and watched Gabriel, Gage, and Asher survey the room.

Only Gage smiled. Obviously.

Asher’s eyes went to the bodies, then me. “Oh fuck,” he muttered.

Gabriel’s eyes did the same thing, though that was while he stormed over to us. His eyes were so feral, his body so tight, that Scott stepped in front of me as if to protect me.

He crumpled to the ground about two-point-five seconds later when Gabriel put his fist through his face.

I gaped at Scott’s unconscious body. “That was so not cool,” I shouted at him.

He grabbed my shoulders and shook me. Roughly. Enough so my teeth chattered together. “Are you fucking insane?” he roared.

I waited for the shaking to stop. I wasn’t scared, though his fury was something to behold. I knew he wouldn’t go further than that. And he didn’t, stopping almost as soon as he started.

“I’m not insane,” I answered slowly. My gaze flickered to Gage, then back to him. “Especially not when compared to current company.”

Gabriel gritted his teeth. “You think this is a fuckin’ joke?”

Ironic that the man who used to laugh about everything, failed to find the humor in this situation. Granted, there wasn’t much.

I didn’t lower my gaze. “No, I don’t think it’s a fuckin’ joke. I think this is life. Which is really the biggest joke of all, but I’m not in the mood to talk philosophy.” I sucked in a breath. “I’m in the mood for revenge, and a taco. But the former was better.”

Gabriel gaped at me. “And you thought comin’ here, without fuckin’ telling me, or anyone else, not letting us take care of it, was a suitable form of fuckin’ revenge?” His grip tightened on my shoulders.

I jutted my chin up, not caring about the audience of Gage, who was kicking at a body with his boot, or Asher, who was talking on his phone, using the word ‘cleanup.’ “I’m not going to sit here like a little lady while the ‘men’ do the ‘man's work’ of exacting revenge. I’m not entrusting
my
revenge in someone else’s hands, no matter how muscular the arms attached to them are.” I regarded him evenly. “It happened to
me
. They took everything from
me
. Whatever shreds of my soul I had left, they tattered. I’m not letting someone else take care of the punishment for that theft. I’m going to be doing that myself. I’m going to make sure I take everything from them too, and I’m going to make sure I leave nothing.” I looked around. “Maybe the way you’re used to doing things is letting the man take the gun and do the shooting. I’ll tell you now, that’s not what’s going to happen here. I may have a kick-ass manicure, but that doesn’t mean I’m not afraid to get my hands dirty, to get them bloody. To squeeze some triggers.”

He stared at me a long time, then down to the body at our feet.

“You got this?” he asked Gage and Asher.

Gage nodded.

“Good. Take care of Becky’s car.” His eyes went back to me. “We’re leavin’ now.”

He didn’t really give me a chance to say anything before he just dragged me out. I didn’t protest because the smell of blood was starting to get more than a little sickening. That and the fact I’d spilled that blood.

Twice. I’d done that twice.

I chewed over that thought the entire ride home, wondering what that made me. I’d killed two people. Evil people, yes. But two wrongs didn’t make a right, or whatever. But they wouldn’t hurt another girl or woman now, and I was pretty sure that was right.

As soon as we pulled up at our place, Gabriel yanked me off the bike and pulled me inside.

He slammed the door and started pacing. Then he stopped. “How did you know? Where he was?”

“Nat called me,” I said.

His eyes were dark. “And it didn’t occur to you that it could’ve been a fuckin’ trap? That they weren’t waiting for you to get there so they could take you away? Away from me, from everything, for fuckin’ good?” he asked.

I scrunched up my nose. “Not at the time.”

He did make a good point. I guessed I was lucky.

“I didn’t think of anything, really. Apart from the fact he was still breathing. Polluting the earth with his presence. Hurting people. Then all I thought was how good it would be if he weren’t breathing. That maybe it might make me breathe a little easier.”

Gabriel stepped forward and yanked me into his arms, all brutality gone. “You’re fearless, babe. So fuckin’ fearless that it scares the absolute shit outta me. You lay your life on the line for your friends in an instant. Without hesitation. Run in front of fuckin’ bombs for them. I need you to have that hesitation, Becky. I’m proud as fuck that my girl’s so fearless. But I need you to feel fear at the possibility of leaving this world. Leaving me.”