Desperately Seeking Shapeshifter (17 page)

I nodded. “I just had a fright. Bad memories.”

“Tell me.”

“No.” Reliving them once was enough. I didn’t want to go through it again.

His hand slid over my shoulder and across my collarbone, and I watched his gaze move to the mate mark on my neck, his eyes intense.

“I brought steaks,” I said suddenly. “For dinner.”

He quirked an eyebrow at me, and for the oddest moment, I had a feeling that Ramsey wanted to smile at me.

“I’ll get the steaks,” he said. “You sit here. Relax.”

I sat down on the old sofa and waited, smoothing the skirt of my borrowed dress. I felt like an idiot all around. I’d nearly gotten the handyman killed. I’d dressed up for a man who ran away at the thought of touching me. And I’d shown everyone that I was still the weak, fragile creature they thought me to be. I
hated
that.

I heard Ramsey toss the steaks in the fridge and then his big heavy feet move across the wood floors toward me. I straightened the spaghetti straps of my sundress and looked up at him.

“I need to change tonight,” I told him. “I need to change every night. To practice.”

He nodded.

“Will you help me?”

“Yes.”

It felt awkward to be around Ramsey while I was naked and waiting for my muscles to shift. I kept thinking of last night, and I guessed that he was, too, judging from the way he absolutely refused to look at my naked body. That was all right; it gave me a chance to look at his.

His chest was covered in a dusting of hair. His arms were impressively thick and his waist long and lean. A thick line of darker hair started at his navel and trailed down to the largest piece of male equipment I’d ever seen. I swallowed hard. I’d expected him to be big. I just hadn’t thought about
how
big. It distracted me, especially when Ramsey pulled my body tight against his again, his hands on my shoulders.

“Relax,” he told me in that deep, rumbling voice that reverberated through my muscles. “Look for that place in your mind. The shifting starts in your head, not in your body. If you think it through, you can encourage the shift. It’s hardest when you don’t anticipate it.”

I felt the warmth of his body, the slow thrum of his pulse. I stretched an arm out into the air, watching my skin tremble as it sprouted fur. To my surprise,
Ramsey’s hand reached out and caught mine, grasping it tight.

I will always catch you,
it seemed to say.

The change was not swift that night, but it was far less painful, which was encouraging. When I was in my wolf form, Ramsey’s large body shifted to bear, and he crouched low on all four of his massive legs. Immediately, his scent changed and my senses went on alert. A wolf always noticed when there was another predator in the area, and a much larger predator was standing right in front of me. The wolf-mind couldn’t handle it.

But Ramsey only moved forward and licked one of my ears, and then his scent became familiar all over again. He was still Ramsey underneath, and Ramsey would die before harming a hair on my head. My wolf-body relaxed and I danced away. When I dashed into the woods on the scent of a rabbit, he followed a fair distance behind, giving me room to breathe but still close enough to keep me safe.

I was hot on the tail of a rabbit, deep in the underbrush, when my body trembled and my legs seized. I collapsed onto the ground, startled to realize my body was changing back. That hadn’t happened before. It didn’t feel painful, though, only urgent, so I crouched low and let it happen.

When the transforming was done, I flung myself backward in the dirt and stared up at the night sky, sprawling and utterly naked, and utterly winded.

A large, naked male body thumped down on the
ground next to me, and I looked over to see Ramsey staring up at the skies as well.

“I’ve never had that happen before,” I said, looking over at him. “Changing back so fast.”

“Shifting is a muscle,” he explained without looking over at me. “If you use yours every day, it will get tired. But you will build up stamina, and that is when true control comes. Nothing to be worried over.”

Like Kegels.

I looked over at Ramsey, a hot flush on my cheeks. He continued to stare pointedly at the sky. Was it because of me, or because he was thinking about Nikolina? Did he want to be running naked with her?

“Can we talk about last night?” I ventured.

“No.”

I rolled over on my side and propped up on one elbow. “Let me rephrase. I really need to talk about last night.”

He started to get up. I placed a hand on his shoulder. He glanced over at me, then seemed to realize how naked I was, and immediately flicked his gaze away again.

My hand remained on his arm. He was so warm, his skin so vibrant under my touch. I loved touching him. “I wanted to tell you that . . . I really liked it when you bit me. It made me feel things I haven’t felt in a long, long time. And I was wondering . . .” I trailed a finger along a thick muscle. “If you wanted to continue . . .”

He looked over and glared at me. “No.” He sat up in a rush of leaves.

I grabbed him before he could leave. “Ramsey, I know you’re a virgin.” He gave me a glare of such anger that I rushed to continue. “That’s why I think this would be good for both of us. You need someone to teach you, and I need someone to show me that sex doesn’t have to come with fear.”

He leaned in close, seething with anger. “I am not a charity case—”

“No charity,” I said, and leaned in and kissed him lightly, my tongue grazing his lips. “I want you.”

His face remained stony, unconvinced.

“It’s true,” I whispered. At least he wasn’t running away. This was good. “Do you want to feel how wet you make me?”

His eyes flared with hunger.

Excitement trembled through my body, and I got to my knees and crawled toward him. “Put your hands on me, Ramsey.”

He glanced down at my naked body for the first time, and I felt a shudder pass through his big frame. “I don’t . . . I’m not . . .”

“I know,” I said softly. I took his big hand in mine. “It’s fine.”

He gazed on me as if he’d been starving. “You’re so small and fragile and I’m . . .”

“Big,” I breathed. “I know. You won’t hurt me. I trust you.” When he still hesitated, I placed his hand at the vee of my thighs.

He groaned with need, and I felt his hand cup the hot flesh there. A finger slid between the lips of my sex and he stroked, feeling the warmth there. “So wet,” he groaned.

“Wet for you,” I encouraged, rocking my hips on his hand. “Touch me.”

His finger slid through the wetness, soft at first, then stroking harder. When I moaned in encouragement, he tugged me into his lap. I straddled him and felt just how enormous and hard his cock was against my smaller frame. A quiver ran through my body.

He noticed it, and when I leaned in to kiss him, the kiss he gave me in response had a hint of hesitance.

“We’ll take it slow,” I said. “Just kissing tonight.”

“And if I . . .” His words broke off with a groan when my hips flexed over his.

“Then we’ll learn stamina together.” When he didn’t smile, I leaned forward and bit his lower lip. “But if you get to come, I get to, too.”

I’d been enjoying just kissing him when exhaustion had hit me like a ton of bricks, so Ramsey had picked me up in his arms and carried me back to the house. The exhaustion was to be expected if I was learning how to control my wolf, he’d explained.

All I knew was that I woke up to see late morning sunlight streaming through the window. I
was sprawled in the bed, alone, still naked. Guess I’d slept all the way through the night. How disappointing.

I took a quick bath, dressed in a T-shirt and jeans, and headed down the stairs. The kitchen was empty, but there was bread and jelly, and I decided to make myself a few slices of toast.

Until I realized there was no toaster. It was probably just as well, since plugging in a toaster was probably tantamount to a death wish in this house. I found a tarnished silver knife in one of the drawers and spread jam on plain white bread instead. I was ravenous.

As I ate my fourth slice standing up, Ramsey entered the house. He was already sweaty, his dark shirt plastered to his big body, a baseball cap tugged low over his brow. He had streaks of dirt on his forearms and mud on the knees of his jeans.

“You shouldn’t have let me sleep so late,” I said around a mouthful of bread, and swallowed. “Makes me feel lazy.”

He moved over to my side and grabbed me by the hips, lifting me onto the counter.

I looked at him in surprise, then his mouth brushed against mine in a soft kiss. It was greeting and subtle request all in one, and I melted underneath it. I didn’t care if he was sweaty or dirty—he was delicious. I dug my fingers into his shirt and leaned in to his kiss, my tongue stroking into his mouth.

He groaned, his big hands clenching my bottom
so hard he nearly pulled me back off the counter. I felt a shudder go through him, just before his tongue licked into my mouth in a deep, claiming surge.

I broke the kiss off with a gasp, feeling that stroke all the way through my body. “Wow.”

“Hi,” he said, and pressed another hard, fierce kiss on my mouth.

“What are you doing that has you all dirty this morning?” I asked, running a hand down his chest. The smell of sweaty, sexy skin filled my nostrils, mingled with Ramsey’s warm scent. It was so unfair for a man to smell that good.

“Fixing the steps on the front porch. How are you feeling?”

I ran a hand down his sweaty chest. “Turned on?”

His dark eyes flared with need. “Tired? Muscles hurt?”

I shook my head.

He leaned in and kissed my nose. “Good.” His gaze searched my face for a moment, then he asked, gruffly, “Second thoughts?”

“God no,” I said, my fingers brushing over his nipple through the sweaty shirt. “I just wasn’t sure if now was an appropriate time—”

“Fuck appropriate,” he rumbled and leaned in to kiss me again. He stopped just before his lips touched mine, and I watched him, entranced. “Your hair’s pretty.”

Was that his way of flirting with me? I grinned, entranced by this new side of Ramsey. “You said you liked red.”

“I like you,” he said, his gaze intent on my face. “I just don’t know . . .”

Oh, no. He wasn’t getting second thoughts on me. I began to wrap my legs around his torso to hold him into place, but a sharp knock at the front door made both of us jump.

A low growl of dislike rumbled in Ramsey’s throat. For some reason, that made me giggle. The man did not like to be interrupted. I liked that about him. I patted his shoulder. “That’s probably the handyman again.”

He offered me his hand immediately, and I felt warm. So thoughtful. I slipped my hand in his, and we went to open the front door together.

Gracie stood on the doorstep, chewing gum. “You got breakfast over here? This big bad wolf’s cupboard is bare.”

I let her in. “Just bread. I should go into town and grab some stuff.”

“I’ll do that,” Ramsey said. “You stay here. Rest.”

Gracie wrinkled her nose but said nothing, spreading jam on a slice of bread.

“I’m not an invalid,” I said crossly.

Ramsey scowled down at me. “You need to rest.”

“I’m fine.” I put my hands on my hips and glared back, ignoring his frown. “I just spent the last eight hours resting.”

There was another knock at the door.

“That’s going to be the handyman,” I said.

“I’ll get rid of him,” Ramsey said.

“You will not,” I said. “There’s a hole in the ceiling the size of a cannonball, and I don’t want it raining on me.”

He continued to scowl down at me.

I ran a finger down his chest. “Please?”

His scowl didn’t change, but he pulled me close and lifted me for another hard kiss, then set me down on the ground and answered the door.

The handyman gave Ramsey a perplexed look when he answered the door. “This a good time?”

“No,” Ramsey said, but he gestured for him to enter the house anyhow.

The handyman smiled at the sight of me, slow and easy. He held out his hand for me to shake, and I felt a weird sort of compulsion. I liked this man. I trusted him. I placed my hand in his and smiled.