Determination (19 page)

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Authors: Angela B. Macala-Guajardo

BOOK: Determination
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That’s it? That’s her reaction? Annoyed by Sassy’s disappointment, Roxie slipped into her emotionally detached state and drew her sword as she felt her eyes glow. A part of her hoped Sassy would ask to spar with her. After all she and Aerigo had been through to learn how to unlock Frava, Sassy’s reaction got under her skin.

Sassy eyed the glowing sword with a raised eyebrow, skeptical. “And white-glowing eyes. How interesting.”

Huldra folded her arms. “Sassy, you need to take some of her energy if you want to fight her. She’ll pass right through you otherwise.”

Roxie held out her shield hand. “Go ahead.”

“Fine. Don’t cry when I beat you.” Sassy plunged Roxie’s hand in her icy grip but Roxie didn’t flinch. The cold meant nothing to her, a distant discomfort that lasted mere seconds.

Sassy’s form became as lively as Aerigo’s and Daio’s, she took a deep breath, batted aside the sword barehanded, and Roxie blocked the series of punches with her shield. Roxie pushed her off with all her physical strength, not ready to reveal her willpower just yet. Sassy did a backflip, landed in a crouch, and came at her again with more punches and kicks. Roxie dodged and blocked them all with ease, leaning or ducking just enough to feel only air hit her face. Sassy came at her harder and faster, and Roxie more blocked than dodged, not even trying to swing her sword, and one kick connecting with her shield made her stagger, but she was indifferent to the sheer power behind the blow.

Sassy dropped into a fighting stance. “Come on! Stop holding back. Go on the offensive!”

Roxie held her sword out in front of her for all to see, then slowly sheathed it with a satisfying click and gave Sassy a taunting wave. Aerigo smirked.

Daio held up a hand. “Uh, Sassy--”

“Shut up, stupid man. I’m busy.” Sassy charged her.

Making a fist, Roxie flung her will out, rooting Sassy in place with a fist poised a foot from Roxie’s face. Sassy blinked a few times and tried to move, grunting with effort, but she was as stuck as a statue that could blink and breath. “I can’t move!”

Roxie forced Sassy’s arm down and willed her to her knees, making Sassy gasp and struggle anew, but she didn’t stand a chance. Roxie stood before her and lowered her fist. Once Sassy stopped struggling, Roxie let her go.

Daio ran over and helped Sassy to her feet. Clutching his arm, she said, “I’m alright. And impressed, now. I apologize if I offended you.”

“Apology accepted,” Roxie said in her flat, emotionless voice. She closed her eyes and made herself take a deep, calming breath. She was eager for a harder fight, an outlet for all her pain and frustration. Sure, crying had released a lot of pain, but she felt a need to bring Nexus to justice. It was like a physical pull on her body, urging her to keep moving and not give up. The skirmish had made her need for justice flare up, but she made herself calm down and focus on the present.

Daio said, “Rox, I think you just figured out how to turn Aerigo on.”

Aerigo gazed at her with open admiration, an amused smile on his face.

Roxie said, “Yeah, I’m not that kid you bumped into on a city street that night anymore.”

Sassy said, “Someone needs to bring me up to speed. You wouldn’t all come just to watch me knock sense into this man here. What exactly is going on?”

 

Chapter 13

Legacy

Sassy wore a thoughtful frown. “Well then, let’s do what needs getting done so you can hurry up and get out of here. I don’t envy your task, kid.” She got to her feet and so did everyone else, each Numina near their assigned soul.

Roxie stood with Aerigo at her side, at the feet of Waul’s gate. Huldra beckoned to the gate and it rumbled closed, sounding like an earthy, thoughtful hum. Roxie said, “I appreciate your help but you don’t have to come. I don’t want to pull you away from your soul’s journey.”

Sassy put her fists on her hips. “I’m an Aigis. Helping is what we do. And you, kid, are in dire need of help.”

“Thank you,” she said, meaning it, “and please call me Rox or Roxie.”

“What? Don’t like ‘kid’?”

“I don’t feel like one anymore.”

“How old are you?”

Roxie met Sassy’s green-eyed gaze flecked with gold. The thought of admitting that she was seventeen, maybe eighteen, depending on how much time had gone by on Earth, made her feel embarrassed. How could anyone as old as Aerigo and the rest believe Roxie stood a fighting chance? “Young.” Still, despite her age handicap, she had to try. There was no one to take her place and, like Sassy just said, she was an Aigis. She
wanted
to help those depending on her.

Sassy gave her a sympathetic smile. “Considering all you’ve been through, I doubt you’d feel like a kid anymore.” She pulled Roxie into a hug, wrapping her in an icy embrace. “Poor child. Forced to grow up well beyond your years.”

Eyes widening, Roxie opened her mouth but trapped the gasp in her throat, wanting to pretend the hug was pure comfort. Sassy had an air of strength and compassion about her, and carried herself confidently, instilling Roxie’s trust in her like she trusted Aerigo. She could hold her own in a fight. The intensity of her attacks during their brief skirmish left no room for doubt. On top of that, there was something motherly about the hug, something she’d never get from her birth mother. Grandma had done her best to fill in the role of mother figure but Roxie had never felt compelled to call her “mom” instead of “grandma.” As much as she knew she shouldn’t, she found herself emotionally latching on to Sassy. She coaxed herself to return the hug, thoughts of having a surrogate mother bouncing around her head.

“I’ll do everything I can to help you out of here. I’ve been on my soul’s journey a long time. It won’t hurt to make it a little longer. Your journey is more important right now.”

Spoken like a true mother. Putting her child’s needs before hers. Heart wrenching, Roxie managed to say “thank you” in a steady voice, then sighed with relief and stuck her hands in the warmth of her underarms. Heat seeped back into her limbs and front side.

Sassy scrunched her brows. “What’s wrong?”

“You’re freezing cold to me. All three of you are.”

“You didn’t react when I took energy from you.”

“I didn’t care at the time. I was in fight mode.”

“Aha. Well, that explains why you and your boyfriend don’t touch much.”

“He’s not--” Roxie cut herself off. If Aerigo hadn’t corrected Daio when he’d called her Aerigo’s girlfriend, then why should she correct Sassy?

“Oh, I’m sorry. Are you two already bonded? You act like it. I shouldn’t have assumed.”

“Bonded?” Did she mean married or something? Roxie’s stomach fluttered at the thought, but then squirmed when she replayed passing through Aerigo’s corporeal body. Such a union would never happen.

“The joining of soul mates in a formal ceremony. The name of such a ceremony varies from world to world.” Daio stood behind Sassy and pressed his chain-covered body to hers. Reaching for his face, Sassy said, “Stupid here never tried.” She narrowed her eyes yet leaned against him and met his loving gaze. “I’m angry with you about that, too.”

“I know. It’s another of my regrets. I never asked you because of what Nexus was commanding me to do. I thought it’d make things easier on myself, but it didn’t.”

Sassy gave him a tender look. “You poor, stupid, selfish man. Next time think of us, instead of just yourself.”

He took the hand caressing his face in his and kissed it. “If only there was a next time.”

Roxie faced Aerigo and he gazed at her longingly. If only indeed. Her heart ached for him. She’d hoped to dream of him after their meal together but she couldn’t recall anything. All that aside, what if they pretended to be together--bonded or married--while she was stuck in the spirit realm? Make the best of the situation...

Aerigo glanced at the other Aigis and drew close enough to Roxie to get her heart racing in a good way, yet she could feel the cold emanating from him. He brought his face close to hers. “One more?”

Roxie glanced at their company. She and Aerigo had their rapt attention. Roxie spread her wings, providing the a bit of privacy, took Aerigo’s face with both hands, and pressed her lips to his. She accepted the icy cold but it still blocked her from fully giving in to the moment. Aerigo caressed her face with his fingertips, sending pleasant shivers up and down her spine, and making her come up for air before kissing him again. He shuffled closer, closing the gap between their bodies, and Roxie involuntarily shied away, cutting off the kiss. She held onto his face a moment longer, then let go, leaving her hands hovering inches away. She ached to melt in his arms--warm arms--but only in her dreams... She lowered her arms and folded her wings.

“Aw, don’t be shy,” Daio said playfully. “No need to hide your affection from us.”

Smiling, Sassy elbowed him and he grunted. “Don’t listen to him. Neither of us mind, but do what makes you feel comfortable.”

Roxie gazed into Aerigo’s deep blue eyes and felt her own start glowing.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“There’s no next time for us, either. No ‘after.’ I don’t want you to have any regrets when it comes to me. I don’t regret anything with you.” Other than how little time they’d had together, but she didn’t want to admit that aloud. It’d make their impending parting harder for her.

“My only regret is that I won’t be there to help you take on Nexus, but I have a feeling you’ll succeed. I believe in you and how strong you are.” He kissed her forehead. “I’ll do everything in my power to give you full confidence in yourself and prepare you for what you must do.”

Roxie wore a genuine smile and felt her eyes stop glowing. “Thank you.”

“Boy, those two need a room--ow!” Daio clutched his side.

Sassy picked up a length of chain. “We need our own room so I can discipline you.” She twirled an arm’s length of chain and snatched it in both hands. “You’ve clearly unlearned the manners I taught you.”

“It’s all part of my charm, babe.” He grabbed her rear.

Sassy flicked the chain around his wrist and yanked his arm into the air, bringing their bodies together. Daio wrapped his free arm around her waist and she pointed a finger at his face, started to say something, but fell silent for a moment. “You are too handsome for your own good.”

“Surpassed only by how beautiful you are.”

She raised her brows in approval. “Ah, so you still remember how to pour honey into my ears.” She released his arm. “A little rusty but it’ll do for now.”

“I aim to please.”

Aerigo held out an arm for Roxie. “Let’s take a walk.”

Despite the cold, Roxie laced her arm in his and he led her away, along the gate and stone wall. Sekiro and Firsos followed from a respectful distance. Kiowa sat watch at Daio’s feet, her gaze cast over the vaulted space. Energy sprites danced around overhead and the dozens of Numina began going about their business, staying far away and giving Roxie fewer glances.

Aerigo said, “I would’ve liked to have spent many years getting to know you, and then asked for your hand when the time was right.”

“So I
am
too young for you.”

He shook his head. “No. Your age is irrelevant. What matters is the person you are. And you are an amazing young woman. Age is just a number, a planet’s lap around a star. The size of a planet’s orbit varies within a certain margin of uniformity, but the counting of such cycles isn’t universally equal, so don’t get hung up on our ages. I would have simply waited for you to feel ready.”

“I don’t feel ready,” Roxie admitted, “but I love you.” Aerigo took her in both arms and she ignored the cold as best she could. “I love you, Aerigo. You’ve made me happy in ways no one else has. I don’t know how to explain or describe it. There’s just something about you that makes me feel safe, happy, and completely at ease when I’m with you. I enjoy your company, talking or not talking, doing anything or nothing. You just have to be you and be there for me.”

Aerigo looked at Firsos and the bear loped off towards a vine-covered stone wall, and lay down. Aerigo guided Roxie over to it, Sekiro started marching back to Sassy and the others, and Aerigo took Roxie’s hands in his. He guided her to the ground so they both sat up against Firsos’s side. Aerigo sat with his body angled towards her, propped up on one hand, and face near hers. He turned over her shield, unlatched the buckles, and set it aside.

“If at any time you get too cold and need me to stop, I will. I love you, too, Rox.” He kissed her temple. “I love you so much.” He kissed her cheek. “I can never thank you enough for how much you helped me, for how good you make me feel.” Cupping her face, he kissed her on the lips and pulled back, as if afraid of making her too cold too fast.

Overcome with desire, Roxie rolled over and straddled his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck, and began kissing him over and over on the lips. He loved her. He’d confessed his love for her and how he wanted to be with her just as badly. She’d implicitly known this but, hearing it for the first time ever, she felt a need to be as close to him as possible and hold on tight.

She tuned out the chill icing up her thighs, pretended his lips were just as warm as hers, and that his neck was burning with just as much passion as she felt her own body temperature rise. Big, strong, icy hands grabbed her glutes as Aerigo pulled her body to his. She hugged him harder, gasping for air between kisses, but, when they opened their mouths for a full make-out, the icy stroke of his tongue was like feeling ice cream on the back of her teeth, giving her a painful jolt. She tore away, gasping for breath and Aerigo went still beneath her.

Roxie caught her breath as warmth returned to her face and mouth, and she became aware of the biting cold touching the rest of her body. She gave him one more kiss before sliding off his lap and hugging her knees to her chest. She wanted to cry but she felt all dried up, empty. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

He gently shushed her. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

“You better enter one of my dreams next time I have to rest.”

Aerigo smiled. “I will.” He ran a hand along her inner thigh and kissed her again.

They gazed into each other’s eyes again and Roxie felt like she could spend the rest of her life studying the varying shades of blue filling up his irises, the shape of his eyes, the line of his jaw, the softness of his lips, how everything about him made her gravitate towards him. She reached up and brushed his lips with her fingers. Soft, yet ice cold. Roxie’s love for Aerigo would endure for as long as she lived. And if she survived all this craziness and eventually fell in love with another man, she would honor Aerigo’s memory by loving both men equally.

Daio and Sassy were talking in low voices with Huldra and Sekiro listening on, and Kiowa still at his feet. The wolf looked at Daio, who met her gaze. Daio looked at them, then spoke to Sassy. She stepped out of his embrace and met up with Aerigo and Roxie, a contented smile on her face.

“Daio and I would like to do an informal bonding ceremony for both of you.” She stood before Roxie and kissed her on the forehead. “May you find joy in your time with Aerigo in this realm, and may those memories forever stay with you.”

Once again, Roxie felt an emotional bond with Sassy. She’d probably make a great surrogate mother. However, Roxie kept such thoughts to herself. She didn’t need to make things harder than they already were.

Sassy moved to Aerigo and he lowered his head so she could kiss him on the forehead as well. “May you find joy in your time with Roxie, until you to two must part, and may those memories guide you towards everlasting peace.”

“Thank you,” Aerigo said.

“Yes, thank you,” Roxie said as Sassy stepped aside for Daio, who stood before Aerigo. She smiled at Roxie.

Daio said, “Alright, I’ll give this sappy stuff a shot.” Sassy swatted him in the back of the head and he cried out in pain, clutching his head. “Alright, alright.” Letting go, he took a deep breath and looked seriously at Aerigo. “Despite all I’ve done, I’ve always found joy in seeing you happy. Enjoy her. She’s probably one of the best things that’s ever happened to you. Don’t ever forget that.” They clasped hands and pulled each other into a one-armed hug, then let go and nodded to each other. Daio sidestepped to Roxie and gave her a nervous smile. “Not sure what you’re comfortable with.”

Roxie had to admit she didn’t dislike him as much as she did a short while ago. “I don’t hate you.” Did she trust him yet? Not quite. “I trust Aerigo and Sassy to keep you in line.”

“Yeah, I’m building quite the collection of babysitters, aren’t I?” He ran a hand through his spiked-forward hair. “All things that’ve happened aside, I know I’m full of wise cracks, but it’d mean a lot to me if you’d let me give you my blessing as well, but I don’t want to force you if you don’t want it.”

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