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Authors: Jayne Blue

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“Most of it isn’t my story to tell, Sly. It’s Tora’s. But yes, she was pretty much the key to finding evidence to get me out of that hell hole once and for all.” I looked back down at the phantom smudge on the table. I didn’t want to say anymore. Knowing what Tora did to find the evidence to free me was one more burden I had to carry. But just as I told Sly, that was Tora’s story to tell, not mine.

Sly smiled. “She grew up to be something, didn’t she? She’s just like your mother.”

I nodded. “That’s the blessing in all of this, I guess. Mum and Da were gone long before I got locked up. It would have killed her anyway.”

There was something else we needed to talk about but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Not then. And it wasn’t lost on me that Sly hadn’t asked. I didn’t know what that meant just then but it unsettled me. While my daughter managed to get me out of prison, the man responsible for putting me in was still out there drawing breath.

George Pagano. He was the head of one of the largest organized crime families still around. During Blackie’s time, we drew a large part of our income from our association with them. But those days were gone now. Pagano wasn’t. But today wasn’t about that.

Sly sat back in his chair and looked off to a point on the wall. “They’d have known you were innocent, but yeah. I suppose that is some small blessing.”

I ran a hand through my hair. “God. Enough of this sad shit. Tell me something good, Sly. Tell me about all of this.” I waved my hand in a circular motion around the table.

Sly raised a brow, his lip curved into a broad smile. “We got there, Dex. Just about, anyway. All of the crap you and I dreamed of, it’s happening. We have a stake in some real, legitimate businesses. It’s taken me almost every day since Blackie died, but we have a future now. And I want you to be part of it. You
are
part of it.”

I shook my head. I never would have believed Sly could shake off the specter of Blackie Murphy and the club’s outlaw days in less than a decade. But it seemed he had.

“There’s the bar,” Sly went on. “The Wolf Den is a small chain. We’ve got ’em here, in Vegas, near Detroit. There’s some merchandising that goes along with it. But the main thing is the gym. Some of the guys are going to take you out to GWG tomorrow if you’re up for it. I want you to see what we’ve got set up.”

“Shit, Sly.” I whistled. “Don’t tell me you’ve gone corporate.”

He threw his head back and laughed. “We’ve always been corporate, Dex. It’s just a matter of doing things that won’t land us under law enforcement radar anymore.”

His smile dropped. I knew he hadn’t meant to bring the conversation down that fast and he really hadn’t. I raised a brow and smiled to let him know it was all right.

“Come on then, already,” Sly said, rising from the table. “Those guys are going to start tearing the place apart if you don’t get out there and throw a few back with them. It’s time to celebrate.”

“Yeah. I know.” I didn’t move from my seat. There was one last thing I needed to know and it was the thing I’d dreaded asking from the moment I lit out of Illinois and headed west.

“I need you to tell me about Ava, Sly. I need to hear it from you.”

Her name seemed to hang in the air between us. In the two thousand miles between here and Chicago, her name had been on my lips. It had been thirteen years but I remembered every single detail about her. The sweet smell of her hair, the feel of her lips when she kissed me. The curve of her hips when I pulled her close to me. Pain seared my palms and I realized I’d dug my nails into the flesh there. I had to know, but I almost didn’t want to hear it.

“She’s okay, Dex,” Sly said. “It tore her up pretty bad when you went away. But you knew that. She’s strong. Except for the train wreck that was Tora’s mother, you made a habit of surrounding yourself with strong women. Ava was one of them. She’s doing all right. You told her not to wait for you and she didn’t. She made a life for herself.”

While one weight lifted from my shoulders, it seemed another settled in its place.
She made a life for herself
. Good. It’s what I wanted. It tore my guts out when I told her to forget about me. I told her I’d do the same. It was the biggest lie I’d ever told. But now I had to live with it. I remembered her face, the tears she cried when she came to see me at Marion. I’d been cruel. I’d been definite. I didn’t want her to ever come back to that place. Not for me, not for anything. At the time, there was no hope I’d ever see the light of day again. They sent me away for life. I set her free.

I stood up from my chair and Sly put an arm around me. He said some things as we walked toward the door together. He opened it and I was greeted to a chorus of cheers, old familiar faces and new friends, all raising their glasses to me. It was good. It was home. But all I could think about was the girl I left behind.

I had no right to ask if I could see her now. No right to even ask where she was. When I said goodbye, I meant forever.

It turns out forever can sneak up on you faster than you think.

 

Chapter Two

Ava

“All right, Mrs. Pulaski, you just count to three and you won’t even feel the stick.” The old woman gave me a dubious scowl as her clouded gray eyes narrowed to slits.

“Don’t you
let
that very large black man come near me!”

Keeping a firm but careful grip on Mrs. Pulaski’s left arm, I glanced over my shoulder. Cal, the very large black man in question, shook his head and gave a shrug.

“We’re just trying to help you, Mrs. Pulaski,” he said. I didn’t like the look of the angry welt on Cal’s cheek where she had scratched him when he tried to help her onto the gurney. She apparently also tried to kick him in the balls when he put her in his rig to transport her to my E.R.

I turned back to her. “Cal’s going to stay right where he is, I promise. Now you just do what I said. Give me a quick three count and we’ll get you feeling better in no time. You’re dehydrated.”

She gave me a defiant harrumph but started counting. I rolled her arm quickly and got the needle catheter in on the two count. Before she could move,
I pulled the needle and hooked up her lines. She gave me a sweet smile as I untied the tourniquet from her bony upper arm. Her skin was soft and brittle like crepe paper. I patted her on the knee.

“Nice moves, Nurse O,” Cal said from the corner. I shushed him. Mrs. Pulaski did better when she focused just on me. I smiled back at her.

“You just give that a little time and you’re going to feel good as new.” Her eyes narrowed to slits again as she watched the fluids drip into her arm. I checked the bag and slid the IV stand as far behind the bed as I could so she couldn’t reach it.

“Now you stay put,” I said. “The doctor is going to be here in just a second. Can we call Judy for you now?”

Misty, the World’s Greatest Nursing Assistant, poked her curly red head around the curtain and wagged her eyebrows at me. I smiled and jerked my chin up. She smiled and nodded. We were under control now. On a scale of one to ten, Delores Pulaski was only at about a five on her usual difficulty meter. She suffered from advanced Alzheimer’s and had a habit of wandering off from her daughter Judy’s apartment. This was the third time in a month. She really needed round-the-clock care but Judy Pulaski couldn’t afford it. We did the best we could for her. For now, some electrolytes and blood pressure meds would set her to rights. Next time, she might not be so lucky. Unfortunately, there was really no way Social Services wouldn’t have to get involved now.

Misty came to sit with her and I walked over to Cal, peeled off my exam gloves and threw them in the trash. Then I put my hands on my hips and looked up. Cal was very large indeed. My eyes came to about his mid-chest level and I stared up at him and stomped my foot. “Your turn now,” I said, poking my finger into his chest. “Let’s get
you
cleaned up. No arguments.”

Cal’s face melted into a sheepish grin and he shook his head. Then he straightened and saluted me. “Whatever you say, Major.”

I hooked my arm through his and led him into the adjacent examination room. “It’s Captain, and I’m retired, smartass.”

Cal popped up on the gurney and I went to the sink to scrub my hands again. “Where did you find her this time?”

Cal sighed. “She got as far as the park at the end of her street. Scared a couple of teenagers making out under the slide and they called 911.”

“Good thing,” I said. I gripped Cal’s chin with my fingers and tilted his head so I could get a better look. “Does that hurt?”

He had three long scratches along his left cheek. The deepest one at the center oozed fresh blood. I didn’t think he’d need stitches but that one might leave a scar.

“Who’s riding tonight?” he said, hissing as I tilted his head the other way.

“Dr. Endicott’s here,” I answered. “You’re lucky. Brancheau’s on vacation until next week.”

Cal nodded. Dr. Brancheau treated everyone in the E.R., including EMTs like Cal, like something he’d scraped off the bottom of his shoe. It didn’t help matters that Cal was now dating Brancheau’s ex-girlfriend, one of the first-year interns. This place really
was
a night-time soap opera. Except there were no McDreamys. Plenty of McNastys and McWhat-Was-I-Thinkings though.

My gut clenched at the memory of my own recent bout of bad judgment. My cell phone kept vibrating in my pocket because of it. Last night, after a particularly busy shift and too much beer, I’d engaged in some very “fourth or fifth date behavior” on my second date with Chris the pharmacist. I hadn’t drawn up the courage to call him back yet.

“Great.” Cal hissed again. For a very large man, he was also a bit of a baby. I patted him on the stomach.

“Endicott’s one bed over last I checked, I’ll send him in next. I’m guessing he could probably be persuaded to just use a little glue. Bright side, chicks dig scars. Think how tough this will make you seem.”

Cal rolled his eyes. “Yeah. Help me make up a better story.”

“What?” I backed toward the door and spread my hands wide. “I wouldn’t dream of letting
everyone
know you got taken down by a little old lady.”

“Shhh! Have mercy on me, Olander!”

I laughed and turned on my heel. I stole a glance at the clock above the nurse’s hub, something I try never to do. I worked nightside seven to sevens. It was just past midnight now. We’d been slow all evening but it was a full moon. I knew it wouldn’t last.

“Endicott still down in 3?” I called over to Joleen, my roommate and partner in crime at the desk. She had a phone in her ear. She tucked a loose strand of her nut brown hair back into her ponytail holder, nodded, and pointed across the hall. Just then, the ambulance bay doors opened and two uniformed officers came in. They each had an arm around a skinny, craggily faced man who dragged his feet between them. He looked up, his eyes glassy and a stream of spittle hanging from the corner of his mouth. He wore a gray t-shirt that had probably been white at one time. There was a flash of recognition when he saw me, then his eyes went out of focus again.

One of the officers, Tom Gleason, I knew well. We’d both been working the same basic shift for the better part of five years. I also knew this particular patient well.

“Tommy Boy!” I clutched my hand to my heart with one hand as I hit the button to open the security doors to let them in. “It’s not even my birthday and you bring me presents?” I grabbed a wheelchair and slid it over to them.

“Yep,” Gleason said. “Fast Eddie here said he just couldn’t get enough of your sweet face, Ava.”

“Be still my heart.” Gleason and his partner, a rookie who looked about fifteen with bright red hair and a deer-in-headlights expression, unhooked themselves from Eddie and gently plopped him into the chair.

I put on a new pair of gloves and crouched down to Eddie’s eye level. “We’ve got to stop meeting like this, Eddie.”

With a jerking motion, Eddie pulled up his chin. For a split second, he locked eyes with me, then his went out of focus yet again and his head lolled to the side. He reeked of bourbon and sweat and his skin was practically iridescent yellow.

I put a hand on Eddie’s knee and peered down, trying to get him to look at me again. Eddie was in end-stage liver failure. Like Mrs. Pulaski, we’d do the best we could for him, but he’d no doubt end up back here before the month was out ... if he lived that long. We got two versions of him depending on how epic his current bender was. He was either belligerent or abusive to everyone he encountered, or like he was now, docile and barely able to stand. Docile Eddie was harder to bring around.

“Wanna go best two out of three?” A voice came from behind me.

I straightened. Gleason whistled and shook his head.

“Aren’t we up to about seven out of nine?” I said, turning to Dr. Mark Endicott. He was in his mid-thirties like me, buff with a thick head of sandy hair and had a natural curve to his mouth that gave him a constant smirk. I’d been telling him for the better part of a year he ought to grow a mustache so the patients didn’t think he was just being an asshole.

He had just returned from his own tour in Afghanistan with a Medevac unit. We never talked about it, he and I, but I could always tell when a patient here sparked some memory for him. He got quiet. Took extra time. Disappeared into the linen closet at the end of the hall. And he knew when I was having a rough time too. I’m the one who showed him how to pick the lock on the linen closet.

Endicott bent low and shined a light in Eddie’s eyes. Misty came around and wheeled Eddie into an open exam room. We really were dead so far. The waiting room was cleared out. I usually found that an ominous sign.

“I’ll take .20. That’s one and a half,” Endicott said as Misty pulled back the curtain.

“You doing
Price is Right
rules?” Gleason asked. “Maybe I should get in on this. You still play for Diet Cokes. Put me down for .10.”

I shook my head. “Sucker bets, both of you,” I said. “We play for caramel lattes at this level. And its .320 or I’m buying for the whole E.R.”

Misty walked by laughing. “I can’t believe you guys still take Ava on. She’s kicked your ass so many times.”

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