Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission (7 page)

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Authors: Gloria G. Brame,William D. Brame,Jon Jacobs

Tags: #Education & Reference, #Health; Fitness & Dieting, #Psychology & Counseling, #Sexuality, #Reference, #Self-Help, #Relationships, #Love & Romance, #Sex

BOOK: Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission
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In discussing the American Psychiatric Association’s decision to reclassify homosexuality in 1973, Dr. John Money points out that politics and pocketbooks inform scientific bias.

A major political struggle of gay activists to have homosexuality upgraded from an illness to a social status required having it declassified from the
Diagnostic and Statistical Manual
of the APA.… Inevitably, the old guard fought back. They were loath to relinquish their conviction that homosexuality is always a disease for the cure of which they provided a treatment (and earned an income)
.

—J
OHN
M
ONEY
14

Although attitudes are changing about what constitutes acceptable sexuality, the view that paraphilia is an illness requiring treatment prevails.

Most of the psychological literature is bent on demonstrating that alternate (which I prefer to “deviant”) sexual practices or lifestyles are in some ways sick. This is a consequence of the medicalization of psychology. I’m not very happy that psychology is seen as a medical process. It seems to be far more a philosophical inquiry, if you will. Nobody knows why people become anything
.

—W
ILLIAM
A. H
ENKIN

In the last few decades knowledge about D&S behaviors and customs in the D&S subculture has largely been disseminated not by scientists, but by sexual practitioners themselves. Increasingly sophisticated modes of communication (beginning with the explosion in the publishing industry, and extending to television talk shows and, especially significant, to computer bulletin boards) have provided individuals with a wealth of information about sexuality. And the observer effect has played a significant role in the growth
of minority sexuality communities. Open communication about D&S has attracted thousands of fetishists and sadomasochists to D&S support networks. There is no more instructive example of the observer effect than the transformation of the Old Guard of sadomasochistic homosexuals into contemporary D&S culture.

T
HE
L
EATHER
E
VOLUTION

I think S/M is changing now because the opportunity for communication exists in a fashion that it has not had ever before. Kinky sexuality is talked about more on television and radio talk shows. The purpose of the people producing all of this media [may be] to sensationalize in many cases, but the effect is that people are not living in dark, separate corners, as I was when I was young, believing that no one does any of this stuff. They are [informed] by general media that [such] fantasies are acted upon
.

—J
OSEPH
B
EAN

The gay leather scene traces its ancestry to two sources: the barracks of World War II and the motorcycle outlaws of the 1950s and 1960s. As the origin mythology describes it, leathermen derived their complex authoritarianism from the first source while from the second they acquired an abiding fascination with black leather and bike clubs.

The massive American military mobilization of World War II uprooted millions of men who might otherwise have found scant opportunity even to travel from their hometowns and placed them within a huge, exclusively male society under pressure of a cataclysmic drama. Men whose homosexuality might have remained repressed or hidden were given an extraordinary opportunity to explore and gratify their desires. For gay men of a sadomasochistic bent the military offered a further thrill: power and discipline within an authoritarian framework. Gay leather sex then and now is a celebration of Greco-Roman ideals of masculinity—a hypermale society that embraces classical male values and rituals such as honor, service, initiation, mentoring, and paying one’s dues.

Upon their return to the States about 1946, many of the gay vets wanted to retain the most satisfying elements of their military experience and, at the same time, hang out socially and sexually with other masculine gay men. They found that only in the swashbuckling motorcycle culture did such opportunities exist and so the gay bike clubs were born
.

—G
UY
B
ALDWIN
15

By the early 1960s the existence of this subculture had reached the attention of the avant-garde. The film
Scorpio Rising
(1963)—described by author Hunter S. Thompson as “a bizarre little comment on twentieth-century America, using motorcycles, swastikas and aggressive homosexuality as a new culture trilogy”
16
—depicts men slowly and sensuously dressing in leather jackets and Levis, and contains a few sadomasochistic vignettes.

Leathermen did not generally welcome public attention. Entering their society was intentionally made difficult. Each newcomer had to prove his worth in a controlled social environment where experienced people guided him through a lengthy training period. Failure to abide by the complex unwritten rules governing dress and demeanor meant at least a lessening of social status and at worst ostracization. This social milieu has since come to be known as the Old Guard, and networking was among its key social regulators.

One of the mechanisms that keeps the S/M community relatively safe is networking: People know people within the community who know new people within the community, and so on. I’m talking specifically about the male subculture, which is what I know best
.

—J
OSEPH
B
EAN

Although Old Guard conventions continue to influence gay and straight leather and D&S communities, its rigorous etiquette has been considerably diluted. This is largely attributable to a sizable influx of men (and women) who seek sexual acceptance among peers. The very things that made the Old Guard strong—a highly evolved social structure and a sense of community—attracted new members and, ultimately, contributed to its demise.

[When] Tom of Finland became widely known—his art primarily dealt with gay male leather imagery—suddenly there were a couple of years when leathermen were the living icons of gay sexuality. The result is that the network breaks down. There is an influx of endless numbers of curious people; there are more people showing up at play parties and the bars than could possibly be assimilated. In my view, for the S/M community to remain somewhat underground and somewhat unaccepted, so that people have to approach warily and have to prove themselves as trustworthy individuals, is in fact a very high value for the community
.

—J
OSEPH
B
EAN

The leather community met a previously unfulfilled social need. And as novices flooded in, activists became keenly aware of the vital importance of
educating those who would not have the opportunity for individual mentorship.

T
HE
M
ODERN
S
CENE

In the second edition of
The Leatherman’s Handbook
, author Larry Townsend writes:

A little over ten years ago I signed a contract to write
The Leatherman’s Handbook.…
It was a virgin field, wide open, and, except for my disagreements with a few shrinks here and there, the ideas I was suggesting were fresh and new. This time, however, I am faced with a mountain of written material expressing the opinions of a great many people.… Making the present task far more difficult … is the enormous increase of people participating in a very wide area of activities.
17

The blank slate upon which Larry Townsend wrote in the early 1970s had rapidly filled by the 1980s. Until the 1960s the main sources for information on D&S were clinical studies; by the mid-1980s a wide array of nonfiction and fiction about D&S (much of it produced by gays and lesbians) became available. For a time it seemed that the 1960s’ relaxation of sexual mores had opened the door to free discussion—and exploration—of unconventional sex.

Increasing numbers of individuals began to form D&S alliances. Leather had begun as a uniquely gay, subterranean culture centered around motorcycle clubs and bars; in the 1970s heterosexuals—influenced by the early and exhilarating victories of gay liberation as well as the formation of consciousness-raising groups by feminists—seized on the idea of forming S/M support groups. The Eulenspiegel Society, the first such group in the United States, was founded in 1971. Two decades later the National Leather Association—an umbrella organization for S/M support groups and social clubs—reported “an international network of well over 400 Leather/SM/Fetish organizations.”
18

A backlash in the gay and lesbian communities against S/M, however, temporarily inhibited the burgeoning subculture. Three events—all occurring in 1980—helped excite anti-S/M sentiment. The film
Cruising
portrayed the leather scene as inherently sordid and violent. That same year CBS Television aired
Gay Power, Gay Politics
, a documentary that erroneously stated that S/M is a mostly gay male practice and that 10 percent of all gay deaths in San Francisco were S/M-related. Neither claim could be substantiated,
and the producers were later censured by the National News Council, but the documentary had already conveyed its message about leather sexuality. That same year the National Organization for Women (NOW) passed a resolution advocating homosexual rights and condemning S/M. These events and the 1982 publication of
Against Sadomasochism
, a collection of feminist essays that harshly condemn S/M, have cast an enduring pall over relations between non-leather and leather gays and lesbians. The same year also saw the publication of
Coming to Power: Writings and Graphics on Lesbian S/M
, a collection of essays and fiction by lesbian feminist sadomasochists, which provides an intellectual framework for reconciling sadomasochism, lesbianism, and feminism.

Krafft-Ebing’s legacy lives on in popular opinion. Although contemporary Americans are certainly more likely to perceive sex for pleasure as an acceptable activity than did the Victorians, deliberately nonreproductive sex—and particularly any form of sex which does not have heterosexual intercourse as its main ingredient—is generally regarded as perverse.

The last two decades have witnessed a social phenomenon. The diverse leather communities—prolific in their writing and sophisticated in their organization—have attracted thousands of D&Sers in search of community, support, and the opportunity to socialize and meet like-minded partners.

Unification, however, remains problematic. Many organizations limit membership according to same-sex or opposite-sex preferences. Many heterosexuals are uncomfortable socializing with gays, and homosexuals perceive straight sadomasochists as swinging thrill seekers, uniquely interested in D&S as an episodic erotic event rather than as a committed lifestyle.

The heterosexuals into radical sexuality have never felt the need to build specialized communities in the same way as their homosexual counterparts. In the Gay/Lesbian sub-cultures, garments and even toys become symbols carried well beyond the area of play into the open light of public spaces. They speak of a tribal affiliation that is as strongly social as it is sexual.… For most straights, radical sexual practice begins and ends in the bedroom or the playroom
.

—G
EOFF
M
AINS
19

As the organizational network expands, however, leather traditions—particularly the adoption of leather dress codes, respect for seniority, and a tribal spirit—are more widely emulated. Heterosexuals who once largely looked to pornographic novels for role models—and who typically discovered that the fiction provided no advice on the daily problems of real people—are turning to the D&S communities for advice and support.

This evolution has led to “pansexualism”: Gays, straights, bisexuals,
and transgenderists fraternize and attend parties together. The National Leather Association has taken a leadership role in unifying all D&Sers, regardless of partner preference, into a cohesive political and social force.

There is a lot of separation between the straight, gay, and lesbian S/M communities. But there is also pan-S/M consciousness. As one wise woman who has been doing this for many years has said, “Leather is thicker than blood.”

—G
AYLE
R
UBIN
20

Finally, one of the most significant developments in heterosexual D&S has been the rise of the electronic samizdat. Hundreds of D&S-oriented electronic bulletin boards have formed since the late 1980s. For many people still laboring under the Victorian ideas of acceptable sexual behaviors and living in sexually and politically conservative regions, the anonymity and accessibility of these on-line networks has permitted a free interchange of ideas on topics formerly too distressing to discuss even with relatives or friends.

As of this writing, international electronic networks have become a primary medium of communication and socialization for millions of people interested in D&S-related sex. The on-line environments offer everything from peer support and discussion groups to sites dedicated to personal ads, erotica, and graphic images. On the Internet, news groups prefixed by “alt.sex” treat individual topic areas (female dominants, water sports, fetishism, spanking, inter alia). The most heavily-trafficked area is “alt.sex.bondage,” which features lively, sometimes acrimonious, debates on D&S issues and technical “how-to” discussions. On the World Wide Web, new D&S sites are constantly emerging, hosted by enthusiasts and vendors from Hoboken to Hong Kong. On Compuserve, the Human Sexuality Forum’s Variations II (founded in 1987 by Gloria Glickstein Brame), is the nation’s oldest on-line D&S support and education group.

The observer effect has held powerful sway in cyberspace, where large numbers of newcomers emulate the behavior of loquacious veterans and eagerly adopt the prevailing mores, etiquette, and slang. The net effect seems to be a growing emphasis on the technical elements of D&S and on its enormous potential as casual, safe-sex play. One of the more intriguing phenomena has been the proliferation of “play parties” and “munches,” regional social events organized by and for D&S cybernauts who meet for “3-D” interfacing.

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