Dirty Crown: A Bad Boy Secret Baby Royal Romance (with BONUS book - Rebel Rockstar!) (9 page)

As I lie next to her, just staring at her, I know that I will have to wake up soon, and that this will all become a distant memory. I will have to act like we only need to be friends as we hang out with the daughter that we share, whilst fighting against my mum who will want me to marry some princess brat…

I sigh deeply, wishing that I could just stay in this dream where everything is perfect. Waking up and facing reality – that’s where things get very difficult…

I
love my job
.

It really is the greatest thing in the world to me after all that I’ve been through in my life. It took me a while to move away from the fast food industry and into something that I actually worked towards in my education, but I made it in the end.

It makes me feel good, like I can
really have it all
– the child and the career – just because of this job.

Okay, so it’s only for a few hours a week while Lily is at school, but it totally counts as far as I’m concerned. I sort out the history archives in the local small museum, and I relish every single second of it.

“Are you okay?” The kindly, older manager Bill asks me.

“Can I get you a cup of coffee?” He’s such a nice man – practically an adopted grandfather to me, and I adore him for that.

Every since I became all but estranged from my own family, he’s the closest thing to a parent that I have and I really appreciate him. He’s always been so good to me, giving me time off when Lily is sick, and I love that about him.

“I would love that,” I smile up at him and I watch him leave the room.

Finding myself alone one more, I start to whistle a happy tune. Even when my life is all up in the air, my job can make me happy. When I’m here, I feel safe and secure. It’s as if nothing bad can ever happen here…

“Faith Harper?” A sharp voice interrupts me, sending shock waves racing right through me. I glance up to see an oddly familiar face to me.

“Marcus?” I gasp shocked.

What the hell is Edward’s security guard doing at my place of work?

“What are you doing here?” I flick my eyes around, wondering where everyone suddenly is.

Why am I alone in this nightmare here? How is history repeating itself?

“I think that we have a lot to discuss don’t you? Is this a good place to do that?” His tone is so cold that it actually makes me shiver.

I can just sense that something bad is going happen, and it terrifies me. Why is it that every time Edward comes into my life, drama isn’t far behind him? It’s as if the entire world is against us, trying to push us apart.

But we keep ending up back together – like magnets.

“Err, sure?” I question, not really sure if that’s the truth.

My brain goes crazy wondering what he’s going to say, even though deep down I already know.

“Does Edward know that you’re here?”

“No, he does not.” The way he speaks is so formal, so stilted that it makes me question his motives.

Is he still as close to Edward as he seemed to be beforehand? He doesn’t seem like the man I first met in Cornwall, that’s for sure.

“But this doesn’t need to go through him.”

“Okay,” I drawl, feeling oddly afraid.

There is something so weird about this that it’s driving me crazy. What is going on?

“Now, I don’t imagine that you’ve forgotten our last meeting, have you?” He sends me a meaningful look, which fills me with a chill.

Edward doesn’t know that Marcus came to see me on our wedding night, just before I ran away, and I always intended to keep it that way.

I hope that I can still keep that to myself, but if something happens now, then I might not be able to.

“I haven’t forgotten,” I shudder as the words he spoke to me that night race right through me.

I’ve always tried my best to forget them, but deep down they’ve always been there, haunting me, affecting every single one of my decisions.

“So I assume that you remember what you promised? To the queen of all people.”

“Of course I do,” I snap back coldly.

“But things are different now.”

I refuse to back down this time, I won’t be bullied again.

I’m not the same scared girl he found back then – many years have passed and I’ve changed a whole lot.

“I regret what I did that night, and I will never leave Edward again.”

Okay, so I’m not sure that he really wants me in that way, but that isn’t the point here. I just need Marcus to know that he can’t get to me again.

“He has been denied the chance to get to know his daughter because of the crappy choices that I made and I won’t let that happen again.”

I stare him down, hoping that he can see how serious I am about this.

“He didn’t even know that she exists until a few days ago, and that isn’t fair to anyone. And nothing that you or the queen can say to me will make me change my mind.”

“So what you are saying is that you are going back on your promise then?” There’s a threat there, I can hear it clearly, but I’m stronger now, more determined.

No threats can take me down, not after everything I’ve survived. Kelly is right, I’ve been through a lot so I can sure as hell get through this.

“I am saying that. I’m saying that I’m going to be in Edward’s life in any way that he wants me, and I’m going to let him spend time with his daughter.”

Marcus looms over me, trying to see how serious I am. I don’t break eye contact for even a second, I stand my ground fully.

“Okay then, I will pass on that message to the queen, but I would like to prepare you for what might be to come. This is the most powerful woman in the entire world, please don’t forget that for even a second.”

I gulp and nod, trying to hide the fear that overcomes me, but I don’t think that I do a very good job of it. I think it shines through regardless.

“I’m sure that I will see you again,” he promises before leaving the room, and an entire trail of destruction behind me.

Will I ever see Marcus and it be good news? It really doesn’t seem like it.

“Oh my God, oh my God,” I mutter as I pace the room in a state.

That was the most terrifying few moments of my entire life and I don’t even know what to do with myself. I can barely breathe, never mind think.

By the time Bill comes back into the room, gripping my mug of coffee between his fingertips, I’m in floods of tears.

“What’s wrong?” He gasps, throwing his arms around me.

“What happened?”

But I’m too afraid to tell him, too scared of dragging him into my mess. It’s bad enough that Kelly now knows more details about my past with Edward with this constant threat hanging over my head.

I cannot bring more people in, it isn’t fair.

“Oh, I don’t know,” I scan my brain, trying to think of a plausible explanation.

“I’m just a bit… emotional. Sorry.”

“Would you… like to go home?” Bill asks, clearly unsure what to do.

He isn’t used to female emotion, and he doesn’t normally get it from me. I’m usually the most easygoing employee going.

“No,” I shoot back quickly.

I need to be here where I can keep my mind occupied.

“Thank you, I’ll just have my break now. Then I’ll be okay.”

As I race into the bathroom, and I stare at my panicked face in the mirror, I recall everything about what
really
happened that night. I’ve tried to block it out, but it all comes painfully flooding back.

Edward left our gorgeous shack, while I lay on the bed feeling on top of the world. I was happier than I’d ever been before and I didn’t think that anything could shake that feeling.

Then Marcus entered.

“What are you doing here?” I’d asked him, stunned.

I knew who he was by that point, but it didn’t make any sense for him to be there.

“I am here with a warning,” he had replied.

“The queen has sent me here to tell you that you cannot be with her son. If you stay with him, he will lose everything – his inheritance, his title, his entire life. You will ruin him. She wants you to go, and she is willing to pay you off for that.”

“But… we’re married now,” I replied, naively thinking that would solve everything.

If they knew that surely they would back off?

“That can be sorted, it can be annulled.” My heart stopped in that moment.

I didn’t know much about the marriage contract, but was that possible? If anyone could make it happen, it was the queen.

“I don’t want to leave Edward, I want to be with him.” I pleaded, praying that this was all just a nightmare, that it wasn’t happening.

“Don’t make me leave, please. I love him.”

“The queen will get her own way, no matter what, so I suggest that you go now. She has done all kinds of things to ensure that things work for her… don’t be another casualty of that.”

The threat was clear and imminent, which left my mind reeling. As I was dazed and confused, Marcus put me in a cab and sent me away before I could even think about arguing.

I still have the un-cashed check to this day.

There have been so many times that I really could have used it, but I refuse to be bought. I wouldn’t allow the reason I left Edward to be for money, even if he never found out the truth.

But it seems like I’m never going to get away, and that the queen will always be behind me, nipping at my heels, trying to get me away from Edward.

Can we withstand that? Are we strong enough? Will Edward even want to try?

There are so many unanswered questions that I cannot work out alone, so I decide to focus on the archives instead. This I can understand, this is logical, this makes sense…

Nothing else does!

I
stare
at my reflection in the mirror, sighing deeply and unhappily. I might be looking smarter than I ever have done in my life, but I’m heading into the unknown. Or more… it’s the known that I really don’t want to accept.

Not only do I have to go on a damn date with Kristine, which I
really
don’t like the idea of, when I rang her up to set it up, she insisted that I attend some ball that she’s throwing here in America.

I’ve had to travel almost two hours to New York for it, which is annoying as hell too. Now that I’ve found Faith and Lily I don’t like being this far away from them for even a few hours. Especially for something that I didn’t want to do in the first place.

But I don’t have much choice – it’s what mother wants which means I have to just get it done. It’ll only be tonight anyway. In the morning I can head back and try to contact Faith, to see when we can finally meet up again.

I know that she’s been busy with work, which I understand, but I can’t deny that I’m growing impatient. I want to see Lily, to be able to hang out with her and to build a bond. Every day that doesn’t happen feels like a day wasted.

“Edward?” Marcus walks into my room, giving me that odd look that he always seems to give me these days.

“Your car is waiting outside the hotel for you.”

“Right,” I sigh deeply, shooting him a strained smile. “I’m on my way.”

I turn back to look in the mirror, but I don’t look at myself, instead I focus on Marcus. I watch him open and close his mouth a few times, as if he’s going to say something, before turning on his heel and walking from the room.

It makes me sad that we have this odd strain between us these days. I miss him, but it’s been such a long time that I can’t see things ever going back to the way they once were.

“Okay,” I say to myself.

“Just… get through this. It’ll be okay.” I shake my head sadly.

“Okay, so it’s going to be awful, but it’s only for a few hours.”

With that morose thought, I make my way down the stairs too. Once in the car, I try to focus my eyes on what I’m seeing, rather than the negative thought spiral that’s currently spinning through my mind, but it’s very difficult. My brain is all over the place.

We eventually pull up outside a very grand hotel, one that’s decorated in a very luxurious way, and I can’t help but roll my eyes.

For some reason I feel like this has all been thrown together to impress me, which makes me kind of mad. I really hope that mum hasn’t hyped up my feelings for Kristine, since I’ve made it very obvious that I have no real interest in her. I don’t want to end up with a crazy rich girl bunny boiler – there’s nothing worse.

Rich crazy chicks have a lot of money and support to act out their stalkerish tendencies, and although I’ve never been there myself, I once had a business mogul friend who did and it absolutely ruined him. He lost almost everything because of it – I really don’t need that.

There are a selection of photographers outside, who are calling out to the celebrities and society people who have obviously been invited to the party to make an impression.

I scan my eyes around quickly, trying to see if there is another entrance, one that won’t draw attention to me, but I can see that this has been designed to be as public as possible. Kristine wants the world to know how many people she is in contact with, and I’m guessing that includes me.

“Marcus?” I mutter to my old friend.

“Will you come in with me?”

I haven’t asked him for a favor for the last few years, so it isn’t surprising that he looks shocked, but luckily, he nods and agrees to come with me.

My heart pounds as I step onto the red carpet. I have a bright smile on my face, and I at least look like I’m waving confidently in the way that my media training expert taught me to when I was only a child, but inside I’m a trembling mess.

I hate it when people yell intrusive questions at me, pressuring me to answer them. It makes me feel uneasy, and in some cases very, very scared.

“Prince Edward, over here!”

“Is this your new love?”

“Will you take a second to talk to us?”

“Are you planning to remarry?”

“Will you pick the princess this time?”

I try to block it out, to have nothing more than a buzzing in my brain, but some of their requests filter through. I don’t have a thick enough skin to feel good about totally ignoring the members of the press – it’s their job to do this, and they have their own lives and families to feed – but I can’t make the mistake of talking to them.

I fell into the trap once when I was much younger and it became a PR disaster. The guy I spoke to twisted something I said quite innocently and took it out of context, to make it sound like I had some very strong political views – which in my position isn’t allowed so it caused quite a complicated stir.

Luckily, we have an excellent media relations team, but I don’t ever want to put them in that position ever again.

“It’s okay,” Marcus whispers to me, reassuring me as he guides me along the carpet.

“Just get inside. These vultures will be onto the next person in a moment.”

By the time we crash through the door, I’m practically breathless with it all. Things like that are much more controlled at royal engagements, so when it gets a little out of control like that it makes it very difficult for me to deal with.

“You’re alright,” Marcus tells me reassuringly, actually managing to make me feel a little better.

“It’s done now.”

“It isn’t,” I admit.

“The worst bit is about to happen.”

He hides his face from me, which makes me feel even worse. It’s almost as if he knows something that I don’t, which in turn makes me incredibly uncomfortable…

“Edward!” A sharp voice rings out, causing me to spin around quickly.

Shock consumes me as I lay my eyes upon her – I wasn’t expecting this one bit.

“Why are you so late? This is a very important event, and I need you inside that ballroom right away.”

At first she grabs onto my arm, but I quickly pull away.

“What are you doing here mum? I thought you were at home.” I can’t wrap my head around it at all, it just makes no sense whatsoever.

“Did you really think that I would miss this?” She smirks at me.

“This is one of the most important events of your life.”

“It is…?” I ask, but I don’t get my answer.

Instead I’m pulled inside, right in to the middle of the chaos.

Everyone is sitting along a long, well decorated table, and the food that is spread across it is something else. I’ve never seen so much! And there are endless bottles of wine, liquor, and champagne dotted around, which are there for the constantly uptight to unwind somewhat.

I know from experience how these sorts of things usually pan out – and it’s never pretty.

I sigh deeply to myself, already knowing how this is going to unfold. I would rather be anywhere in the world right now, but with my mum here, it isn’t like I have any choice.

“Come on,” mum insists, sending me a smile as if she’s actually doing me a favor by bringing me here – is she insane?

“I have a seat reserved for you next to Kristine.”

She leads me over to the head of the table, where I find a very beautiful, raven-haired girl sitting primly.

I’ve seen pictures of her before of course, but there is something much more striking about her in real life. She just seems to have this aura about her that draws people in. I’m already intrigued by what she has to say, and I haven’t even spoken to her yet.

“Kristine, this is my son.” My mum turns proudly to display me like some sort of prized possession.

“Edward Leighton – the Prince of England.”

“Charmed, I’m sure.” She stands and curtseys, showing me the prettiest dress that I’ve ever seen.

It’s obviously been hand crafted just for her, and it fits like a dream. I kiss her hand, feeling a little weird to finally be behaving like a prince for this girl. Everything is so right, just as things are supposed to be, exactly as my life has supposed to have been played out all along.

This moment is exactly the way that a prince like me is supposed to meet his future wife.

But she isn’t Faith.

She isn’t Faith, so I feel nothing, and I honestly don’t know if I would even if I had met someone else.

This might be the way that things are supposed to be, but they don’t feel right for me. It all feels a little… staged, like I’m playing a role, like I’m not actually being myself.

This girl could be the most gorgeous, loveliest creature on the entire planet, and she wouldn’t hold a candle to the girl who still to this day has my heart. It makes me sad because if I were to just go for this moment, I would be doing exactly what my mother, my family, and society expects of me, but I can’t. Not when there’s hope, not when I have a child.

Not when I’ve experienced what true love is supposed to feel like.

“It’s lovely to meet you too, Kristine,” I reply with a smile.

“Please, tell me more about you, I have heard wonderful things.”

Of course, this is a lie, but it achieves what I need it to, and it gets her to open up. If I can keep her talking then time will pass that much quicker.

* * *

A
s the evening
passes and I start to loosen up a bit – almost to the point of enjoying myself – I get to know Kristine much better. Despite her reputation, she actually seems like a very nice person and I can’t help but wonder what she’s done to people to deserve being spoken about as if she’s nasty…

But then I see evidence of it for myself.

“…and then she told me that…” she’s in the middle of telling me about an embarrassing moment that she had recently at a royal engagement, when a teenage waiter accidently brushes past her with one of his trays, causing the smallest reddened stain to appear on her dress.

If I hadn't seen the bump happen, I wouldn’t have noticed the spot at all – that’s how small and insignificant it is – but Kristine simply explodes. Inexplicably so.

“What have you done?” She shrieks, standing up to ensure that she causes the biggest scene.

Once all eyes are upon her, she carries on with her charade.

“You’ve absolutely ruined my dress! Do you know how much this cost? Probably more than you’ll ever make in your entire life.”

The filthy look that she gives him, as if he’s completely and utterly worthless doesn’t sit right with me, and I feel the need to interject.

“Kristine,” I whisper to her.

“It doesn’t matter, you can hardly see it…”

But she isn’t done.

“Go and get your manager right away. Who is in charge of this… this fuck fest?”

Her face is red and angry, and she’s practically spitting as she talks. As the real Kristine comes to the surface, her beauty begins to fade. There’s a deep-seated ugliness inside of her, I can see that now.

I instantly feel myself retreat. I was just starting to think that we could have a friendship, but now I can see that will never, ever happen. She is not the sort of person that I ever want in my life.

As a middle aged balding man, who I assume is the manager, shuffles uncomfortably by Kristine, she starts all over again, laying into the poor lad who really didn’t do anything wrong.

“Are you going to allow this from one of your so called staff members?” She snaps.

“He has wrecked my outfit and ruined my entire night. This whole thing might as well shut down now, I should send everyone home.”

“I… I…” he stammers, growing paler with every passing second.

“I don’t…”

“You, you, you don’t want?” She imitates him nastily.

“Are you going to do anything? Do you intend to pay for this dress yourself?”

“I couldn’t…” she knows that he can’t, and that she has hundreds of similar items in her wardrobe, proving that she’s just being a brat.

“Well fire him then. I don’t even want him in my presence.”

“Now hang on a minute,” I stand up defiantly, even as my mum tugs on my suit jacket, trying to stop me from standing up.

“That really isn’t necessary. You can’t even see the stain.”

She turns to stare at me with a fire in her eyes, and an awkward mumble rises up around the room. People are trying to pretend as if they aren’t listening, even though we both know that they are.

“Are you sticking up for
him
?” Kristine hisses at me, with frustrated tears starting to prick her eyes.

I know that if I completely shut her down she will go into a frenzy, and I just want this to calm down rather than explode even further.

“I just don’t think that we need to go so far…” I try to be diplomatic, but she interrupts before I can get too far with my explanation.

“I just thought that you would agree with me,” she leans in closer to me, winding her fingers in mine.

“We’re the same, we get one another. It’s these… these commoners, non-nobility, they don’t get it. They don’t understand.”

I look at her, trying desperately to find a redeeming feature, one shred of decency in there, but there’s nothing. She’s like a bottomless empty pit of nothing.