Dirty Little Misery (Miss Misery) (7 page)

Three faces looked at me expectantly. Andre smiled.

Crap.

The meeting broke up soon after, but I continued to talk to Andre for a while. He filled me in on more of what to expect with the case and simply more in general about work schedules and my day-to-day activities. He also promised he’d send me files on everything they knew about F dealings in the area, although he wasn’t hopeful I’d get anything useful out of them.

I tucked my notes from the meeting in a drawer in my new desk and stared at the computer. Since I’d yet to log on, someone from IT had helpfully left me instructions and a temporary password to use my first time. I considered trying it out, but as curious I was about the limited access I’d been given, I wasn’t in the mood to poke around. To go
digging
, as Brian had phrased it.

The one thing I wanted from the Gryphons—knowledge about what was in those stolen files—I was unlikely to have access to. Nonetheless, Steph’s comment about seeing what I could find out on my own had stuck with me. Was there a way?

Footsteps approached from behind me, and I set IT’s instructions down.

Olivia Lee clasped her hands behind her back. “I was in the office and wanted to check in to see how you’re faring.”

I wanted to ask her how she expected me to be faring. “Okay, I guess. Nice case to ease me in on. Nine dead people in a creepy situation? Very gentle on the newbie.”

Her smile might have tightened a touch. “Considering the nature of their deaths and your relationship with a certain pred race, it made sense. I didn’t doubt you could handle it.”

“I like to think there’s not much I can’t handle.” Except, maybe, coming to terms with what I was and telling the truth about it to the people I cared about. But that went above normal, day-to-day kinds of situations and into the territory of the absurd. It shouldn’t count.

“I’m sure there isn’t.” Olivia nodded in a satisfied way. “Good then. If you have questions about getting settled, make sure you talk to Agent Pagan. He’s been instructed to help you in any way necessary.”

She’d started walking away when a new idea came to me, and I decided to seize the opening I’d been left. “Actually, there’s something I was hoping you could help me with. It’s not related to this case specifically, but I’ve been thinking it would be a good idea if I could get a better grasp on my abilities. You know, it might help me handle things that could come up while working here.”

I could taste the Director’s suspicion. “Yes, I suppose that makes sense. I’m not sure how we can help though. Perhaps once we get your analysis back from the lab we’ll know more.”

I’d bet they would, and I didn’t want to dwell on that. Nor did I want to bring up the stolen files. I’d had another idea. “I’d like a chance to talk to Victor Aubrey.”

Olivia had stepped away again, but my comment froze her mid-stride. “Why would you want to talk to Aubrey?”

“Well, we do have a similar ability.” Actually, we might have several similar abilities, but I honestly didn’t know if that was the case. Victor had claimed to feed on negativity like I did, but whether he could also create addict-like bonds with humans, or reverse a pred’s bond remained to be determined.

Those talents aside, we also had one more thing in common—our names on the stolen files. That was what I really wanted to talk to him about.

Olivia was sucking on her bottom lip and feeling foolish for not seeing the connection immediately. “Yes, of course you do. But I’m not sure how useful you’d find talking to him to be.”

“Just because we used our gifts for different purposes doesn’t mean he might not know things I don’t. He was a fury addict for a while. It’s possible his master told him things.”

Olivia smoothed her black hair. “Aubrey is going through withdrawal. I’m not sure how cooperative he’ll be with you. He’s not cooperating with us.”

“I’ve heard, but I’d like to try. In the beginning, before he framed me, he was very interested in meeting someone else with his ability. He might be open to talking.”

I could taste Olivia’s emotions churning inside her. She was a soup of anxiety, suspicion and dislike in my mouth. I wondered who the latter was for—me or Victor or both. “I’ll look into it,” she said at last. “Because you’re one of the witnesses, getting in to see him might be problematic. You know what happens once lawyers get involved.”

I’d figured that might be a problem, so I tried not to be disappointed. “Thanks.”

“Anything else?”

I ran a hand over the computer. “Actually, since you asked. I get this and a desk. How about a uniform for when I’m out on Gryphon business? The cops were suspicious of me yesterday. It would make things easier if I looked official.”

Most importantly, I could wave the uniform in front of Lucen. He was not going to be any more pleased by my first assignment than I was, but maybe I could lessen the sting. Or at least distract him temporarily.

Olivia’s phone buzzed. She checked it then stuck it away. “We might be able to supply you with a jacket to wear on official business, yes. That makes sense.”

I grinned as she left, but the expression faded quickly as the floor descended into silence. Sitting on my desk, I replayed my meeting and the conversation with Olivia in my head. Uncovering information about F would require subtlety. As my talk with Olivia made abundantly clear, subtlety wasn’t one of my strengths.

Even armed with a Gryphon jacket, how in the world did the Gryphons think I’d learn anything useful from the satyrs?

Chapter Seven

I was not the only person to suffer from a lack of subtlety. With my head full of everything I’d learned this afternoon, I’d forgotten all about my roommates’ request to talk.

Alas, they hadn’t, and they’d given up on vague notes and cryptic conversations in the kitchen. No sooner than I’d shut the apartment door behind me, Val darted out from the living room and Geoff from his bedroom. I was trapped.

Geoff positioned himself in the middle of the narrow hallway. “Jess, we need—”

“To talk. Yeah, I know.” Resigned, I dropped my bag to the floor. “Were you waiting for me this whole time?”

Geoff stared at his bare feet, and Val tucked her hair behind her ears. I didn’t need to taste their emotions to see how uncomfortable they were. Also, nervous. This was going to be bad.

Valerie slinked back into the living room and moved her knitting off the sofa as if inviting me to sit there. I didn’t. “It’s Sunday afternoon,” she said. “It’s not like we had anywhere else to go.”

I let the comment pass though I knew it wasn’t true. Geoff spent most of his weekends with his girlfriend, and Val enjoyed the sort of social life I’d never had even before my gift had turned me into poor company. She was always out and about, either with friends or her guy of the month.

So yeah, this was a total ambush, and that meant it was time to rip off the bandage and get the unpleasantness over with. I collapsed on a chair. “This is about me and what went down with the Aubrey murders, right?”

I didn’t see what else it could be. None of us were exactly friends, but friends didn’t always make the best roommates in spite of what TV claimed. We were three people who’d managed to tolerate each other, and that was a lot. Or it had been until recently.

Val put her knitting on her lap like the yarn brought her comfort. “We just don’t really understand the part you played in all of that, and…” And? I waited, but Val had run out of words.

“I know you’d like me to tell you more about what happened, but legally I can’t talk about a lot of it.” That was partially true. Mostly, though, it was simply none of their business, and I wasn’t about to share with them the things I wasn’t ready to share with actual friends. “You know I had nothing to do with the murders. I didn’t even know Victor Aubrey until he decided I’d make an excellent patsy.”

“What I don’t get is why,” Val said. “Why you?”

There was no way to explain that without explaining more than she should know. So I shrugged. “Bad luck. Look, you’ve already grilled me on this. What else do you want me to say?”

Val resumed knitting, presumably so she didn’t have to meet my eyes.

Geoff paced in front of the window, obviously realizing it was up to him. “We don’t need you to say anything, Jess. But when the lease is up next month, we’d like you to move out.”

I stared at him, air sticking in my lungs. “What?”

Val’s face crumpled. “Jess, we’re sorry, but everything that’s happened…it’s making us uncomfortable.”

I bolted to my feet, shock turning to anger. It blocked out whatever Geoff and Val were feeling and made my bones buzz with excess energy. “
You’re
uncomfortable because
I
was framed for murder? For the love of dragons, do you have any idea how stupid that is?”

“Jess.” They said my name in unison.

“I was living here before either of you moved in.”

Geoff quit his pacing. “That’s hardly fair. All three of us have our names on the lease. You don’t get special privileges for that.”

Val pulled her knees to her chest. “It’s nothing personal. You’re a nice person. But if you’ve been targeted once, you could be again.”

“Seriously? Being framed once was like getting hit by lightning. Random bad luck.” Except it wasn’t, and I knew better.

Also, as I defended myself, it occurred to me they might have a valid concern. In a way, I had been putting them at risk because of my soul-swapping. At any time I could have brought serious trouble down on myself or those around me.

But that was beside the point. Val had no clue what she was talking about, and shit. I was pissed off and didn’t feel like being reasonable.

“Fine. Whatever. If you want me to go, I’ll start looking for a new place. Since I’m consulting for the Gryphons now, I’m sure I can afford something nicer.”

“You’re consulting for the Gryphons?” Geoff called after me as I stormed out of the room. “Doing what?”

I threw open my bedroom door. “Catching bad guys, obviously. Apparently I have a knack for it.”

I could hear them talking in low voices in the living room, and worse, taste their conflict. I’d caught them off-guard with the Gryphon thing, and I wouldn’t be half surprised if Val changed her mind. She was one of those people who thought Gryphons walked on water. But even if she did reconsider, I didn’t care. They wanted me out? I was so gone.

Taking a deep breath, I sent Lucen a text asking if I could come over. I had to leave the apartment, and he closed The Lair on Sundays, so I couldn’t just pop in there to hang out.

Pity, too, because I could use a drink. My anger was fading to annoyance and no small amount of feeling abused. It kept me wired, but not in a good way.

Only what I thought of as the major emotions gave me a smooth burst of energy: anger, sadness, fear and hatred. Lust worked pretty well on me too, although that didn’t fall into the same category, and I assumed it was only because I was part satyr. All the other negativity people carried around—anxiety, embarrassment, frustration and more—made me jittery.

On that thought, maybe it was time to get rid of roommates entirely if I could afford it. I’d never had much choice before. Boston rents were high, and even with soul-swapping on the side, I could never have managed a place on my own on my old salary. But with what the Gryphons were paying me, maybe I could at last. If I were willing to look in Shadowtown…

It wasn’t something I’d have ever considered before, but since I no longer had to fear preds any more than I feared strange and violent humans, it was worth considering. Shadowtown rents were cheaper because places weren’t in as high demand. Humans had to be pretty desperate to live there in spite of the prime downtown real estate. It was worth asking Lucen about it.

On cue, my phone signaled the arrival of a text.
Come on over. I’ll make you dinner.

My shoulders sagged in relief. Until that moment I hadn’t realized how uncertain I’d been about his answer. It was good to know he wasn’t upset about me stomping out of the bar yesterday. Or, if he was, he was willing to talk about it.

I grabbed my belongings and, after checking that the path between my bedroom door and the apartment door was clear, got the hell out of Dodge.

I must have been throwing off a black enough cloud that Lucen could sense my arrival. His door swung open before I could knock. He’d just showered, judging by his wet hair, and he smelled like soap mixed with his usual satyr cinnamon.

“Hey.” God, I loved the devious gleam he got in his eyes sometimes. I was relaxing already.

“Hey.” He shut the door and pulled me close.

I buried my head against him, inhaling deeply, letting the magic I’d once feared do a glorious job of chasing away more of my tension. One by one my muscles relaxed while my hunger for his body grew. Satyr pheromones were better than any massage or drug.

Drug. F. Damn. Some of that tension returned to my shoulders.

I pressed myself closer as he kissed me, but he pulled away. “What’s wrong, little siren? You’re really stressed.”

I grabbed his shirt, sliding it up his stomach. “I know. I’m trying to destress. Work with me.”

He laughed and removed my hands. “How about something to eat and drink first? I think you should start slowly and tell me what’s up. You ran away so fast yesterday that I was wondering when I’d hear from you again.”

Groaning, I followed him into the kitchen. “Aha. This is punishment for me running out, is it?”

“Yes, I always punish people by pouring them wine and cooking them dinner. You know how evil I am.”

I pouted, watching him get out the glasses. “Sorry. I am feeling irritable. You just happen to make me hot and irritable.”

Lucen grinned and handed me a glass of merlot. “Little siren, much as I enjoy toying with your desire—and yes, I do, can’t help that—it costs me something not to touch you too. I’d just like us to have a normal conversation first. We haven’t done that in a while.”

“Does it? Cost you something, I mean?” I sipped the wine and had to admit it was very good, though not as good as he’d have been. “I always figured satyrs could flip the sex thing on and off on command. It’s how you torment people.”

“Not exactly…no.” A flicker of some emotion passed over his face. “It’s actually more complicated than that.”

I wasn’t sure I’d ever heard him hedge so much on anything. It was very un-Lucen-like. “Meaning?”

“I can explain another time. Drink your wine and tell me what’s bothering you.”

Okay then. Shut down twice in five minutes. That certainly necessitated drinking. “My roommates are kicking me out.”

He pulled out one of the kitchen chairs and sat backward on it. “What the hell? Is this because of what happened with Aubrey?”

“Yup. Apparently, I make them uncomfortable. But it’s fine. I’m getting too old for this roommate crap, and I was thinking I might be able to find a one-bedroom or a studio in Shadowtown I could afford on my own. I want to stay close to a T line.”

“You know, I distinctly remember a time not that long ago when you were afraid of being outcast among humans and forced to live with us.”

“Yes, but I’m more practical these days.”

He pointed to my knife. “And armed.”

In more ways than he knew. “Yeah. So do you know of any decent landlords who lease to humans around here?”

Lucen nodded. “I can help you there. Would be convenient having you closer by. In fact…” He swung himself off the chair. “If you don’t feel like dealing with your roommates until you move out, you can stay here more often.”

“You wouldn’t mind?” I’d been staying over several nights a week, but only when he asked. Lucen had other things going on in his life besides me. To be specific, he had other people in his bed. Keeping his addicts healthy meant satiating their needs every now and then, and I didn’t care to be around for that. The less I remembered he had to do that at all, the happier I was.

On the other hand, my indignation simmered, and I really wanted to get away from Geoff and Val. If there was a way we could schedule this living thing temporarily so that I could keep pretending Lucen wasn’t preying on or screwing other people, it might be worth it to me.

“I’ve got the extra bedroom,” Lucen said. “You’re welcome to it. You don’t make
me
uncomfortable. I like having you here.”

I rolled my eyes at the ongoing joke. “Except when you’re making me wait.”

“Anticipation, little siren. You have to let the rush build.” He raised his glass to me. “So what else is bothering you? I don’t think that’s the only thing.”

“No, it’s not. I had to go in to work today.”

“And?”

“And.” I set my glass down and wrapped my arms around myself. Since I wasn’t sure how much had been in the news or what he might know from other sources, I gave Lucen a brief rundown of what had been discovered in Newton. “The Gryphons did some magical analyses on the victims’ blood. They found what they think is contaminated F.”

It was my turn to wait and watch. Lucen was quiet for a second, then his face turned to surprise. Whether it was genuine, however… Who knew? My job would have been a whole lot easier if I could read preds the way I read humans.

“That’s odd,” he said finally.

I wasn’t sure what sort of reaction would have been useful, but I knew I wasn’t getting it. “That was our thought too. Satyrs make F, right?” As far as attempts at subtlety went, that was lame. It was also the best I had.

Lucen raised an eyebrow and took another drink. “Usually.”

“Usually?”

“F is usually produced by satyrs because you’d need satyr cooperation to make it. It doesn’t have to be made by satyrs though. Theoretically, anyone magically skilled could do it if they could get the ingredients.”

I picked up my wine, trying to get a better look at his face as he opened the fridge. “Because one of those ingredients happens to be satyr pheromones?”

“That’s part of it, but you know enough about magic to know it’s more complicated than that. I was going to suggest spaghetti bolognese for dinner, but I know you’re not a fan of pasta. Burgers on the grill okay?”

“Fine. Go back to the magic thing. How is it produced?”

“Did you come over here for my company or to question me?”

“I thought I’d made it pretty clear before that it was for your company.”

The suspicious expression on his face turned to amusement. “Company? I thought you’d made it pretty clear it was for sex.”

“Which is something I prefer in your company. You’re the one who wanted to talk first.”

“I did, didn’t I?” He was against me in a second, his hands on my arms and his mouth on mine. I sank into the kiss even as my brain screamed he was trying to distract me. It was working too. I was slowly becoming less concerned with everything except the feel of his body, and if he hadn’t pinned my arms to my sides, the ploy might have worked. But Lucen had pressed me against the cabinets, and I couldn’t touch him. As hot as it could be when he restrained me on occasion, this time my inability to move left me with enough brainpower to stay focused.

I pulled my head away, gasping for breath. “Nope. You chose to talk. I want to talk.”

“I changed my mind.” He reached for my mouth again, and when I dodged, he went for my neck, trailing kisses down my skin. Releasing my arms at last, his hands slipped under my shirt and cupped my breasts.

It was difficult enough to breathe, never mind think with his thumbs teasing my nipples. My body screamed to let him continue, and the scent of his skin was stronger than ever. He had to be hitting me with everything he had. I was moaning against my will, aching, and the part of me that could think straight was getting annoyed.