Discovering Us (9 page)

Shit! Shit, shit, shit!

This was so not good. Okay, I needed to stop this now before things got even worse. And to think I’d thought my damned hangover was my biggest problem right then. Lord.

“Slade?” I whispered. His lips on my neck froze, his fingers below stopping their amazing exploration since I’d put my hand down there to stop him, and I felt his body become rigid. “Slade, what are you do—” I started as I slowly turned over to face him.

And imagine my motherfricking shock when I saw Jag’s intense glacier blue eyes piercing mine.

“Slade?” he asked, sitting up, scowling down at me. “Is that the guy you were hanging all over last night?”

“Jag? Wha—? How’d you—? When did you—?” Guess I needed to take another English course next semester, huh? Holy shit! Why was he here? How’d he get here? I lay there staring at him trying to get my wits about me wondering if I was just drunk and imagining this all. I closed my eyes tightly then tried again. Yep. He was still sitting there glaring down at me. And he was in my bed. Wearing nothing but his boxer briefs.

Wait.

Jag was sitting in my bed wearing nothing but his boxer briefs!

And he was sporting a pretty massive boner. Oh my God!

My head spun for a few minutes and I threw my forearm over my eyes, letting this all soak in as I let out a groan. How the hell was this happening? There was a heavy silence and then I felt the bed shifting as he got up. I next heard him pulling on his jeans. Shit.

In my semi-drunken confusion all I could do was lie there waiting on the pink elephants to start marching in and trumpeting away. Was this really happening?

“El? El, take this,” he said after a few moments, pulling my arm away from my face. I opened my eyes and looked up at him. He was holding out a glass of water and had two aspirins in his other hand toward me. Yep. This was definitely happening. I carefully pushed myself to sit up.

“Thanks.” I took the pills and the glass and downed them both, as I silently vowed to never drink again. Too many weird things happened. And the mornings after were oh so much fun too, what with the pounding head and, oh, yeah, the boyfriend who’d been eight-hundred miles away showing up out of the blue. Just. Awesome. I closed my eyes and rested back against the wall, thankful that Mom had made me leave my bed with the iron frame at home, even though I’d begged her to let me take it. It just would’ve hurt my back now anyway. After a few seconds, I became coherent enough to speak. “How did you get here?” I asked in a gravelly voice, looking up at him then looked over at my clock to see that it was after one in the afternoon. Yeesh.

He stood by my bed, arms crossed over his chest watching me. He was way angry, his eyes navy (which I knew meant he was either really turned on or just majorly
majorly
pissed), boring into mine. That hunk of dark hair hung over them making me want to reach up and push it away. He still hadn’t put his shirt on and I couldn’t keep my eyes from roaming over his hard, sculpted chest, his biceps bulging from his fists clenched under them, or the ripped plane of his abs that led to the defined V that disappeared down inside his unbuttoned jeans. Damn. He blew out a breath then said, “When the guys started sending me all the pictures of you hanging on that guy, I got pretty pissed. I tried calling you, but you didn’t answer your phone. What was going on there, El?”

Busted.  My five-year-old self came out in that moment, immediately pointing its accusing finger at someone else. “It wasn’t my fault, Jag! I wasn’t the one hanging on Slade. He was hanging on me!” And sharing that with him went over great. His eyes dared me to say more. Nope, not happening. I wasn’t dumb enough to provoke him further as I watched the muscles in his jaws jumping as he took in what I’d said.

“Go take a shower and we’ll talk after,” was all he said as he took in a deep breath and blew it out. Two deep breaths in less than five minutes. Yep. He was pissed.

Ooookay. I got out of bed, shuffling like an eighty-year-old woman to the door, my body and brain still healing from the enervating effects of fucking Rocket Fuel.

I wasn’t self conscious about being just in my bra and panties because Jag had seen me in my swimsuit a million times before, which was about the same as what I had on. Before leaving the room, I turned to look at him just to make sure he was really there. He was. And the way he was looking me up and down right then was a total turn on. If I hadn’t felt so awful, I’d probably have jumped on him, but as it was, I felt like crap, so I passed for now.

And what good would it have done anyway, I thought, as I left my room. We’d never had sex and I’d begun to think we never would. But Jag
had
behaved pretty friskily right before I’d turned over thinking he was Slade, so maybe there was a chance. A slim chance since we were going to discuss what’d happened last night and this morning after I showered, but still, there was a chance. And thinking that reminded me of Slade and our
Dumb and Dumber
quoting contest which made me snicker then frown. Nothing like thinking about one boy while another’s in your room.

But I loved the boy in my room. And what had happened this morning should’ve proven it to him because I wasn’t going to cheat. I just hoped he saw it that way.

Chapter 11

I was almost twenty when I lost my soul to Jag.

After showering, I felt immensely better, something about the water splashing down being a sort of baptism, a cleansing away of all the grime that clung to me both mentally and physically. I came out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel, my dark, wet hair hanging down my back, rivulets of water running from the ends only to be absorbed into the towel.

Rebecca met me in the hallway. “El!” she whisper-hissed, grabbing my hand and pulling me back inside the bathroom and closing the door. “Oh my God! Ross said Jag is here?” She looked almost crazed.

I just nodded.

“Why?” she asked in a shrill whisper.

“He said he was sent pictures of me with Slade last night,” I explained with a groan.

“Shit!”

No duh, shit. More like double shit. Hell, triple shit would suffice in this situation because all along I’d been silently freaking out inside since I’d turned to see Jag in my bed. “Jag was in my bed when I woke up!” I whispered back.

“What?” Her eyes got great big.

“In his boxer briefs!” I added.

I thought her eyes were going to bug out of her head when she heard that. I had to reach over and use my fingers to close her mouth.

“Do you think you’re finally going to…”

“I don’t know! This is just crazy!”

She nodded thoughtfully. “Do you want Ross and me to leave? We could go to his place, even though it’s kinda smelly because Joe doesn’t know how to clean up after himself, damned pig.”

I bit my bottom lip.
Did
I want them to leave? Did I really want to be alone with Jag right now as angry as he was? “Yeah, if you don’t mind. I mean, if you’re good with it.”

She waggled her eyebrows at me. “Oh, I’m good with it.” She snorted and grabbed my wet shoulders. “El, it’s time!” she squealed quietly.

I smiled weakly at her.

“El, it’ll be fine. It’s Jag. He’ll be sweet to you. Believe me, once you get past that initial burn, it’s all good, okay? Promise.” She raised her eyebrows, nodding again at me.

Ugh. My best friend was coaching me on how to have sex. Yay.

“I’m gonna go get dressed and then we’re outta here. Call me when you’re done so we can discuss the dirty details!” She was so excited I couldn’t help but huff out a laugh at her.

“God, Bec, calm down. It’s kinda weird that you’re like my cherry’s personal cheerleader. And you’re making me really nervous now,” I muttered.

“It’ll be fine, El! Okay, we’re outta here! Don’t forget to call me! I know Ross wants to hang out with Jag before he leaves.” She squeezed my hand then left to go to her room.

I looked at myself in the mirror one last time then took a deep breath before going to my room. When I opened the door, I saw Jag sitting at the foot of my bed, elbows on his knees and his forehead in the heels of his hands. Crap. That was the pose of someone who was trying to get a handle on things in a calm manner, key word being
trying
. Shit was about to get real and someone was going to get chewed plum out. Uh, namely, me.

“Jag?” I whispered softly as I closed my door quietly.

He sat up, running his hands over his face. When he finally looked at me, his eyes went dark as he saw me standing there in my towel. “C’mere.”

I slowly walked over to him. His hands came out and landed on my hips and his head went down to where the top of it rested against my stomach. I remembered he’d done the same thing on Prom night. I ran my fingers through his hair as he stayed that way for a while before he looked up at me. “Do you want that guy? Slade?”

I frowned down at him, moving my hands to rest on his broad shoulders. “No. Of course not. You’re the only one I’ve ever wanted, Jag.”

He breathed out a shaky breath and pulled me down to sit sideways on his lap. “You’re the only one for me too.” His hand went to the back of my neck and he drew me closer, his other hand clutching my hip, arm across my thighs. “I want you, El,” he said looking at me with his dark eyes before pressing his lips against mine, kissing me deep and wet and hard, not giving me any mixed messages at all as to what he meant.

He wanted me. He finally wanted me.

And now I was confused.

I pulled away from him, a little suspicious. “Why now, Jag?” I asked, my brow wrinkled trying not to be hurt if he was pulling some alpha male jealous bullshit here. “Is it because of Slade?”

He looked at me for a few seconds, moving his hand on my hip over to take my hand. He looked down watching as his long fingers played a phantom song using my fingers as the guitar strings. Then he sighed and looked up at me. “No, it’s not because of him. I mean, seeing you with him in those pictures kind of woke me up.” He looked at me and his face got serious. “Shit, El, I’m almost twenty-fucking-two and I want to finally make love to my girlfriend.” His eyes roamed my face as he tried to gauge my reaction to that. I think he liked what he saw because he smiled and touched his lips to mine. Then he grimaced a little and continued. “I know you probably think I’ve been an asshole for not being with you, but I was only protecting you. You were so young and innocent… and time, well, it’s just slipped by. And we never have time when we’re together now. Even when we are together, it’s so short, I didn’t want you to think I’m just wanting in your pants. God, I guess that just sounds ridiculous, huh?” He now looked disgusted with himself as he ran his hand through his hair, moving that unruly, albeit persevering, hunk out of his face.

“We’re here now,” I said, cupping his jaw as I leaned in and touched his lips with mine. “And I kinda want you in my pants… even though I’m not wearing any.”

His eyes went molten and he turned and laid me back on the bed, moving over me to kiss me deeply, his hand tugging at my towel, throwing it across the room, and my arms wrapped around his back, my fingers digging into the hard muscle. God, I wanted him too, more than anything.

He pulled away, leaning on his elbow, to look at me. I was first panting from his kiss, and then from watching him look at me, which made my heart pound hard inside my chest. He’d never seen me fully naked before and I wasn’t sure what he’d think. I felt his eyes roaming over my body, assessing what he saw and I wanted to cover myself from his penetrating gaze until his beautiful eyes rose to meet mine, burning hot, and he lightly cupped my jaw and rasped out, “You’re beautiful, El.”

He leisurely ran his hand from my jaw down between my breasts then to my stomach making my breathing speed up. His eyes had followed the path of his hand and as he kept moving it lower, his eyes came up again and locked with mine. And then he touched me. My back arched up off the bed and I cried out at the contact, feeling like I was going to explode from his touch alone.

Keeping his hand there, circling his thumb against me, he groaned and leaned down to kiss my neck, grazing his lips over my skin as they went lower until I felt his breath tickle my nipple. My body arched again, following its own urges, wanting his mouth where his breath had just lingered.

“Jag,” I huskily breathed out.

He flicked his tongue out and tasted the tip of my breast, and it was as if a bolt of lightning shot through me as I cried out once again. When he sucked my nipple into his mouth, I was all but done. Oh, God, he was going to completely unravel me.

“Baby? This okay?” he stopped to ask, gazing up at me.

All I could do was nod, too overwhelmed by everything he was making me feel. We’d touched each other before, mostly hands inside jeans getting each other off, but nothing like this, so this was all so much at once, making me feel so many things, leaving me literally shaking under his touch. I could feel the intensity building inside of me as his thumb stroked me, his mouth sucking and licking at me, all of it, all of
him
, leading me to a high I knew I’d never forget.

When he slid a finger inside me, that’s when I came, my body having been wound as tight as it could go before it snapped. “Oh, my God! Jag!” I screamed as my toes curled and my hips bucked up off the bed several times, my core clamping down on his finger, as I completely shattered right in front of him.

Oh, my God. Orgasms ala Jagger Jensen were fabulous. Mind blowing. Soul consuming.

As I rode out my climax, I could hear him talking softly to me the entire time, though I had no idea what he was saying. I slowly floated back from where his touch had taken me opening my eyes and looking up at him. “Hi,” he said with a smile, smoothing my hair out of my face.

“Hi,” I whispered back, my breath hitching and a tear slipping down the side of my face, the intensity of it all consuming me, enveloping me, shredding me to pieces as I slowly came back to myself.

He leaned down and touched his lips to mine, wiping my tear away with his thumb. “Are you all right?” he asked drawing back to look down at me, his face a mixture of what I could only decipher as concern, and then awe with a lot of lust thrown in there.