Distraction: The Distraction Trilogy #1 (37 page)

I’m not sure that Susanna is too fond of Elle either, but I’m not sure why.

“Are you well and truly prepared for your exams?” My mum asks Elle, who shakes her head. “Why not?”

“I’m studying and preparing. Most of my coursework is done, but…” Elle’s eyes drift to me. “I’m really nervous.”

“You’ll be fine.” My dad smiles softly at Elle. “I know you’re under a lot of pressure to get the grades you want, but you’re going to do absolutely fine. Have you started looking for accommodation?”

She nods. “There’s a co-ed dorm about half a mile from campus. It’s more of an apartment building.” What the hell? Why didn’t she tell me she’d sorted out a place to live? Is she forgetting that I lived in Cambridge for five years? “It’s lovely.” And that’s my good mood gone.

“Someone suddenly looks sour,” Susanna comments, her brow quirking at me.

Now I wish she had quit.

“He’s just jealous because he wanted to go to Cambridge.” My dad laughs, clapping me on the shoulder.

No, I’m jealous because she’s going to be in a freaking building full of guys and probably wild parties. I remember University.

I have the horrible feeling that I’m going through all of this and in the end I’m just going to lose her to some University twerp with a trust fund.

“I’ll send post cards and pictures,” Elle jokes, but I can see the worry in her eyes. “I’m going to go and do the dishes before I leave.”

“I’ll do them.” I stand but she shakes her head.

“I got it.”

I can’t do anything now she’s insisted, so I thank her instead. If I make a big deal out of it my dad will wonder why.

I want to join her so I can talk to her, but I’m worried that will look suspicious too. It’s funny how, back before we first started this, I’d do stuff like that and wouldn’t deem it suspicious because I felt totally platonic feelings for her. Now… well now everything I seem to do feels like it could be read wrong. What’s worse is that the more I withdraw from her, the more paranoid I get that she’ll find attention in other places.

Sometimes I forget how young she is.

I just don’t want to lose her.

I’m not sure I’d ever recover.

I can’t believe she finishes college in less than a month. How will I cope no longer seeing her walking around on site? It’s going to be torture.

“Are you giving Eloise a ride home?” My dad asks quietly.

“I’m not stupid. I know how it’d look if the wrong person saw.” I say, frowning. “It’s ridiculous. She’s a friend of the family. I’m not sure why it would matter.”

“Yeah.” My dad agrees. “It’s one messed up situation.”

“I don’t think it’s appropriate due to the fact she clearly has a crush on you,” Susanna states and my father and I look her way. I’m glaring at her for opening her mouth and my dad is just looking, his expression blank. “That’s just my opinion.”

“Well keep that opinion to yourself,” My dad snaps, shocking the hell out of me.

Susanna’s mouth falls open. “I didn’t mean any offence by it.”

“Well you offended.” My dad says in a sharp tone. “So what if she has a crush? How would that make my son driving her home inappropriate? Unless you think less of him than he deserves?” He has a point. I wait for her to respond, feeling smug when she only looks away. “Exactly.”

Bitch.

“I’m done!” Eloise calls, racing to the living room, her hands still wet. “I’ve got to run. My dad needs me down at the Trinity building thing.”

Her phone rings as a car pulls up at the end of the driveway.

“Who’s that?” My dad asks, smirking as he looks at the car. I figure that’s permission for me to look and see.

“Justin Fletcher.”

“Fletcher…” My dad looks at Susanna for a moment before looking back to the car.

I can’t look at the car. I can’t look at her. I swear my face is turning red. My temper is getting the better of me.

“Yeah.” Eloise hugs my mum, kisses my dad on the cheek and waves to Susanna before patting me on the head and racing from the house.

We all watch as Justin hugs my girlfriend and kisses her on the cheek before holding the door open for her. I grind my teeth. Since when is any guy his age suddenly a gentleman?

“Isn’t that your brother, Susanna?” My dad asks and the car pulls away.

I try to calm my breathing, but the feeling of betrayal makes it impossible to be calm at all.

“Yes, they started dating Valentine’s Day, as far as I’m aware.” I realise her eyes are narrowed suspiciously on me. “My brother is smitten. They knew each other a while back.”

“Young love?” My mum smiles wistfully and Susanna nods.

Love? What does Susanna know that I don’t?

“Is he a good man?” My dad looks aggravated as he stares at the empty spot the car just vacated.

“He’s a very smart, young, talented and extremely hard working boy.” Susanna states proudly. “Any woman would be lucky to have him.”

Yeah right.

“He paints buildings,” I scoff without thinking and stand. “I’m going to get a drink. Anyone want anything?”

I don’t like the twinkle in Susanna’s eye; it makes her look devious.

My dad’s eyes follow me too, but his are more of concern than anything else.

Isaac
:
You better call me… NOW!

Eloise
:
I know, but I can’t right now. I’m still in the car.

Isaac
:
Are you seeing him behind my back? Be fucking honest because Susanna just said that you’re dating.

Eloise
:
I’m not even going to dignify that with an answer. I’ve been working with him but no, I haven’t been seeing him outside of work.

Isaac
:
When the fuck did you start working with him?

Eloise
:
Two days ago but I haven’t seen you and I didn’t realise my dad was going to send him to pick me up!

My heart settles a little bit.

Isaac
:
I don’t like it.

Eloise
:
Soon I’m going to be in a dorm filled with other men. You’re going to have to learn to trust in me! I won’t be putting up with this every single day that I’m away.

I don’t respond. She’s right; I’m being crazy. I’m going to push her away myself.

Isaac
:
Stay safe. I love you.

Eloise
:
Stay sane… I love you too.

“Everything okay?” My dad asks, leaning against the door jamb. How long has he been watching me? “Who’re you texting?”

I stuff my phone back in my pocket. “Nobody important.”

“You know,” he steps to the fridge and pulls out a carton of apple juice, the apple juice we always make sure we have in for Elle. “I found myself thinking about Valentine’s Day the other day.” He pours apple juice into a glass on the side. “And the more I thought about it, the more I realised how coincidental it was that two minutes before Eloise and her male friend left the restaurant, you left with a nasty stomach bug.” He chuckles a little and leans back against the side. The overhead fan blows his greying hair around on his head, making him look a little insane. “And then their car window was put through in a secluded spot on the edge of town that I’d never heard of before, yet there were no sightings of anybody in that area for the rest of the night.”

I think my heart just failed. I play innocent, blink my eyes and raise a brow. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure stranger coincidences have happened.”

“Definitely,” my dad says, finishing his drink and pushing off the side. “He paints buildings huh?”

“Apparently so.”

“Oh? And what does Katherine’s partner do for a living?”

Blink. “Katherine has a partner?”

“Yeah, she has spoken to you about him a few times. It’s odd, isn’t it, how we absorb information about people we don’t like or even know that well.” He whistles a casual tune as he leaves the kitchen.

Holy fuck… he knows. Or he suspects.

Or maybe he was just speculating.

Was that his blessing? He didn’t get angry, shout or warn me off. He just whistled and walked away. What does that even mean?

Eloise

“I like this one,” I say, pointing to the beige tiles with spiralling patterns. “Lower half.”

My dad smiles and agrees. He ticks it and orders two of his staff to measure it.

“How’s that ceiling plan coming along?” He turns to Justin and asks.

Justin beams. “It’ll be fit for a king.”

My dad nods, pulls me close, kisses my cheek and checks the watch on his wrist. “You can go if you want to.”

The funny thing is, I actually don’t. I’m enjoying this way more than I should. “No, I’m good. I was actually hoping I could just hang out with you, watch you do your thing.”

His eyes soften and he pulls me in to kiss me again. “Really?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m already having flashbacks of the good old days.”

I snigger and skip over to the long desk, which has more blue prints and plans spread across it than I’ve ever seen in my life. “You’re putting in an ice skating rink?”

“Of course.”

“I can’t wait to try that out.”

“You’ll be the first, baby girl.”

I wrap my arm around his waist and look at the plan for that one particular area. “Tell me more.”

And just like that I like my dad again and he seems to like me.

Eloise

My dad drives me to school on the day my exams start and the queue of students waiting to go into the hall might not be huge, but it is daunting. He made me an amazing breakfast this morning, which consisted of eggs on brown toast, fruit and yoghurt, coffee and a gallon of water. He said this will be my breakfast every day for the rest of the week. I can live with that.

It’s the preparation that is killing me. I can’t handle it.

My hands are shaking at the prospect of failing and ruining my future.

Isaac
:
You can do this.

Isaac texted me that this morning.

Eloise
:
I miss you.

I responded, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with his text.

I stare at the paper and wonder where the time has gone. It’s the end of college for me. I’ve done it. I’m finally where I’ve wanted to be for so long, yet I feel so scared and so empty.

I wish I’d seen Isaac this morning, I really do, but I haven’t actually seen him outside of lessons for over three weeks now. I’ve been studying so I haven’t left the house much.

Hayley is two seats across from me. She leans forward and winks.

I sign my name, wait to be instructed to begin and then I let my pen flow across the paper.

I only have four A Level exams this year and I need to get the best marks. That’s eight exam papers, plus my coursework. Please let it be enough.

Isaac

Isaac
:
It’s the final exam now. You’ve got this. Just breathe deep and remember all I taught you. <3

She’s ignoring me. She hasn’t responded to me at all this week. She also hasn’t been into work or to visit for a while. I know she’s been preparing for her exams so I’ve been trying to give her space, but how much space does she need? I haven’t spoken to her for weeks, not properly. Nothing beyond a “Hello, how are you, good, fine, love you, miss you, I’m studying, got to go.”

I rub my eyes and place my feet on the couch. Elle would kill me if she saw me wearing shoes while my feet are on the couch.

I send her a picture of my feet in shoes on the couch and hope that it at least spurs some kind of response.

It doesn’t. I wait until nine before I throw my phone on the sofa and run my hands through my hair. Her exams are over. I’ve called her six times today. Why isn’t she answering? Why isn’t she calling back?

When I wake up in the morning, still dressed and on the couch, I pick up my phone and my heart breaks.

Is this it now? Has our relationship finished? I know we never agreed on me still seeing her while she lives in Cambridge, but I’d hoped that after everything she’d want to try.

I refuse to give up that easily.

Eloise

Lips, touches, caresses, my back tingles. Hmm… that feels good.

I startle awake, my swollen exhausted eyes barely opening, even though I’m being molested in my bedroom.

I turn to face my attacker, who is running his fingers up and down my side, and my heavy heart slows when I see his beautiful face in the moonlight. “You’re quite possibly the most handsome man I’ve ever met.” I lie back on my side and shut my eyes.

“You think?” His lips touch my jaw before his teeth nip my ear.

Holy fuck. I’m not dreaming!

“Isaac,” I hiss, my exhausted eyes pinging open as I look around me for the source of his break in. The window is open. He climbed up the same way I do when I’m sneaking out. “My mum and dad…”

“Aren’t home,” he says softly, pushing me back down onto the bed. “You haven’t called.”

He’s not wrong. “I didn’t want to.”

He stiffens and pulls back sharply. “You want me to go?”

I shake my head frantically as my hand cups his cheek, prickly with stubble. “No, God no. I just meant that… hell… I’m not sure what I meant. I just couldn’t face you.”

He relaxes and his eyes soften. “Why?”

“Because I’m certain I failed and I felt like wallowing.”

“There’s no way you failed, no way at all.” His arms wrap around me and pull me into his chest. “Do you want to get out of here for a while?”

“Honestly? Not really.” I pull away and roll back onto my side. “I just want to sleep. I’m so tired.”

“I haven’t seen you for three weeks, Elle.”

Yeah, I know. I’ve been avoiding you and everyone else for three weeks. “I’ve needed to focus. I couldn’t handle the distractions on top of everything.”

He grabs my arm and pulls. “And now you’re past your exams you can come out and spend some time with me.”

“Stop,” I groan. I’m really not in the mood for this. He pulls on my limp arm again. I try to pry his fingers off with mine, but he won’t relent. Now I’m getting stressed. “For God sake.”

“Stop sulking.” He looks happy and excited. “Please?” And now he’s pouting.

I know I’m being a bitch and I know he deserves my attention and I know if our situations were reversed I’d be heart broken right now, but I’d like to think I’d give him the space he needed. He’s not giving me that.

“Tomorrow.” I try again to pull free. “Isaac…”

“Elle…” He mimics my tone comically and effectively drags me from my bed. I stare at it longingly as he pulls me to my closet and opens it. “What do you want to wear? It’s not too cold.”

“I don’t.” I look down at my pink and white pyjamas. “I’m happy in these.”

“Elle, come on, I’m asking for a few hours.” He snaps, no longer happy but annoyed.

“I don’t want to!” I snap back, equally as annoyed. “I can’t be bothered with the sneaking tonight. I’m too tired. I’ve had a long day, a long fucking week…”

He releases me and chews on the inside of his cheek. “Elle…”

“Not tonight. Can I please make it up to you tomorrow?”

A laugh escapes him as he takes a step away from me. “You’re going to break up with me soon aren’t you?”

Sigh… “I’m not doing this tonight.”

“That’s not a no.” I hear the defeat in his voice. “That’s not even close to a no.”

“Will you lay with me? For a while? I’d like you to hold me.”

“Are you going to break up with me? Because if you’re planning it…”

Growl. “You’re like a dog with a fucking bone. I’m just tired! For the past five months I’ve worked two jobs, studied and gone to classes. I haven’t missed a day, even when I was sick last month. I’ve also sneaked out almost every single night and managed to function on only three hours’ sleep. It’s all over now. I don’t have to study. For two more days I don’t have to fucking work and if it’s alright with you, I’d like to celebrate my lack of shit to do by lying in bed and resting because Lord knows I’ve fucking earned it!” By the end I’m practically screaming. “Soon I’ll be working again, I’ll be sneaking around again and I’ll be getting the results I’m dreading. Right now I’m relaxing. Tomorrow I’m relaxing. If you’d like me to come and relax at yours tomorrow then fine, but I’m not leaving this bedroom tonight. I’m not leaving that bed and I’m not taking off my pyjamas!”

“Teenagers full in love hard and fast, but they fall out of it even faster.” He mutters under his breath, repeating his words from when I first told him I loved him.

“And adult males are so bloody childish.”

“I’m sorry for coming.” He snaps. “Next time I won’t bother.” Shaking his head, he pushes open the window another two inches.

“Isaac.” Now I feel like the ultimate bitch. “I’m sorry… I just… Please, come and lie with me.”

His shoulders sag but he turns, scoops me up and carries me to the bed. I smile, keeping my arms wrapped around him. “I’m sorry you’ve had to witness my ultra bitch mode. I get really grumpy when I’m tired.”

He kisses me firmly, a long closed mouth kiss that does more to me than I ever thought a closed mouth kiss could do. “No, it’s me this time. I’m pushing you and I shouldn’t.”

“I love you. Don’t ever think otherwise.” I snuggle into his chest, tucking my leg between his. “It was nice of you to come, but don’t do it again. It’s too dangerous.”

He lets out a long breath and kisses my forehead. “I don’t think I care anymore.”

“Don’t be stupid.”

“No. I only have you until you go and then I know you’ll find some young guy with everything going for him and you’ll leave me. I’ll be stuck here and you’ll be partying and having the time of your life.”

That’s just not a future I see for myself. “If that’s what you believe, then we’ll make the most of it while it lasts.”

“I wish I could come with you.” He blows out a breath as my heart soars at his words. “I really wish I could come with you.”

“Your mum needs you now.”

“Yeah.”

“I love you. We’ll get through this and, if not, there’s always five years from now.”

He chuckles. I absorb the warm vibrations from his chest and nuzzle his neck. “Go to sleep.”

“With pleasure.”

My eyes drift closed as his warmth sinks into me.

I just wish he’d realise he’s not the only one with those exact same fears. I can’t promise him my heart forever, because I don’t know what’s going to happen in the future. At least I don’t think I can. Right now I feel like there’s nobody else in this world that could make me happier than he does. Sure we have our problems and our limits, but I’m in love with him and soon I’ll be leaving.

I don’t know how to deal with that and I don’t know what will happen once we’re apart.

I can only hope we’ll last.