Do Elephants Jump? (34 page)

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Authors: David Feldman

BOOK: Do Elephants Jump?
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Breath, bad, upon awakening, in the morning

Brick shape of gold bullion

Bricks

holes in
in skyscrapers

Bridges versus roads, freezing characteristics of

Bridges, covered, purpose of

Briefs, versus boxer shorts

Brights/dimmer switch, position of, in automobiles

Broccoli and cans

Brominated vegetable oil in orange soda

Brushes, hair, length of handles on

Bubble gum

baseball card gum
Bazooka Joe’s eye patch
bubble-making ingredients
flavors of
pink color of

“Buck”

Buckles, pilgrim hats and

Buffets, new plates at

Bulbs, light

and noise when shaking
halogen
high cost of 25-watt variety

Bull rings, purpose of

“Bulls [stock market]”

“Bunkum”

Bunnies, chocolate Easter

Buns

hamburger bottoms, thinness of
hot dog, number of in package
versus rolls

Burger King wrappers, numbers on

Burials, position of deceased

Burping and babies

Buses

entry into
idling of engines on
ridges on sides of
seat belts and

Busy signals, fast versus slow, on telephones

Butter

hardening after refrigeration
sticks, lengths of
versus margarine, in restaurants
Butterflies
rain and
sneezing and coughing in

“Butterfly”

Buttons, men’s versus women’s shirts

Buzzing, bees and

“BZ,” origins of expression

“Cab”

Cable TV

channel allocation of
volume levels of

“Caboodle,” “kit” and

“Caddy”

Cadets, military, cap throwing and

Cadillacs, ducks on

Cafeterias, popularity of, among elderly

Caffeine, leftover, from decaffeinated coffee

Cakes

angel food and cooling position
reaction to loud noises
seven layer, missing layers of

Calculators, key pad configurations of

Calico cats, gender of

Calories, measurement of

Calves, versus cows

Cameras, black color of

Camouflage, colors in

Can openers, sharpness of blades on

Canada Dry, origins of name

Canadiens, Montreal, uniforms of

Canceled checks

numbers on
returned, numerical ordering of
white paper attachments

Candles, trick birthday, relighting of

Candlestick Park, origins of

Candy

Baby Ruth, origins of
caramels versus toffee
Milk Duds, shape of
Oh Henry, origins of
placement in vending machines
shapes of boxed chocolate
wrapping of boxed chocolate

“Cannot complete your call as dialed” telephone message

Cans, aluminum, crushability of

“Can’t hold a candle”

Capital punishment, hours of execution and

“Capital punishment”

“Capitalization”

Caps and gowns, at graduations

Caps, baseball

buttons atop
green undersides

Captain, Navy and Army rank of

Caramels, versus toffee

Cardboard on automobile grills

Carpenter’s pencils, shape of

CAR-RT SORT on envelopes

Cars (see “Automobiles”)

Cartoon characters

Casper the ghost
Donald Duck
Goofy
Mickey Mouse

Cash register receipts, color of

Cashews, lack of shells in

Caskets, position of heads in

Casper the ghost, identity of

Cassette players, audio, battery drainage in

Cassette tapes, audio, on roadsides

Cat feces, as food for dogs

Cat food, tuna cans of

“Cat out of the bag”

“Catercorner”

Catnip and effect on wild cats

Cats

calico, gender of
catnip
ear scratching
eating posture
hair, stickiness of
miniature
sight, during darkness
swimming and

“Cats and dogs, raining”

“Catsup”

Cattle guards, effectiveness of

“Cattycorner”

Cavities, dogs and

CDs, Tuesday release of

Ceiling fans

direction of blades
dust and

Ceilings of train stations

Celery in restaurant salads

Cement

laying of
versus concrete

Cemeteries

financial strategies of owners of
perpetual care and

Ceramic tiles in tunnels

Cereal

calorie count of
joining of flakes in bowl
Snap! And Rice Krispies

Chalk outlines of murder victims

Champagne

aluminum foil on neck of
name of, versus sparkling wine

Channel 1, lack of, on televisions

Chariots, Roman, flimsiness of

“Checkmate”

Checks

approval in supermarkets
numbering scheme of
out-of-state acceptance of
white paper attachments

Checks, canceled

numbers on
returned, numerical ordering of
white paper attachments

Cheddar cheese, orange color of

Cheese

American, milk in Kraft
cheddar, orange color of
string, characteristics of
Swiss, holes in
Swiss, slice sizes of

Chef’s hat, purpose of

Chewing gum

lasting flavor
water consumption and hardening of
wrapping of

Chewing motion in elderly people

Chianti and straw-covered bottles

Chicken

cooking time of
versus egg
white meat versus dark meat

“Chicken tetrazzini”

Children, starving, and bloated stomachs

Children’s reaction to gifts

Chime signals on airlines

Chirping of crickets, at night

Chocolate

Easter bunnies
shapes of
white versus brown
wrapping of boxed

Chocolate milk, consistency of

“Chops”

Chopsticks, origins of

“Chowderhead”

Christmas card envelopes, bands around

Christmas tree lights

burnout of
lack of purple bulbs in

Cigar bands, function of

Cigarette butts, burning of

Cigarettes

grading
odor of first puff
spots on filters

Cigars, new fathers and

Cities, higher temperatures in, compared to outlying areas

Civil War, commemoration of

“Claptrap”

Clasps, migration of necklace and bracelet

Cleansers, “industrial use” versus “household”

Clef, treble, dots on

Clicking noise of turn signals, in automobiles

Climate, West coast versus East coast

Clocks

clockwise movement of
grandfather
number 4 on
Roman numerals
school, backward clicking of minute hands in
versus watches, distinctions between

Clockwise, draining, south of the Equator

“Cloud nine”

Clouds

disappearance of
location of
rain and darkness of

Clouds in tap water

“Cob/cobweb”

Coca-Cola

2-liter bottles
taste of different size containers

Cockroaches

automobiles and
death position of
reaction to light

Coffee

bags in lavatories of airplanes
bags versus cans
electric drip versus electric perk in
restaurant versus home-brewed

Coffee, decaffeinated

leftover caffeine usage
orange pots in restaurants

Coffeemakers, automatic drip, cold water and

Coins

lettering on U.S. pennies
red paint on
serrated edges of
smooth edges of

Cola bottles, one- and two-liter, black bottom of

Colas, carbonation in

Cold water and automatic drip coffeemakers

Colds

body aches and
clogged nostrils and
liquids as treatment for
symptoms at night of

“Coleslaw”

“Collins, Tom [drink]”

Color

blood
cash register receipts
wet things

Comic strips and capital letters

Commercials, television, loudness of

Commonwealths, versus states

Computer monitors, shape of

Computers

erased files on
monitors, shape of

Concrete, versus cement

Conserves, contents of

Construction cranes, assembling of

Construction sites

bill posting at
pine trees and
soaping of retail windows

Consumer Price Index, changes in base year of

Containers, for rain measurement

Contemporary greeting cards, shape of

Coolers, Styrofoam, blue specks on

“Cooties”

“Cop”

Copper bowls and egg whites

Copyright pages, strange numbers on

Coriolis effect

Corn chips, black specks on

Corn flakes, calorie count of

Corn silk, purpose of

Corn tortillas, size of, versus flour

Corn, baby, supermarkets and

Cornish game hens, identity of

“Corny”

Corvette, 1983

Cottage cheese, origins of

Cotton

in medicine bottles
shrinkage of, versus wool

Cough medicine, alcohol in

Countdown Leader, film and

Counterclockwise, draining, north of the Equator

Counters on VCRs and audio recorders

Coupons

cash value
expiration date
versus mail-in refunds

Courtrooms, bibles in

“Couth”

Covered bridges, purpose of

Cow Palace, naming of

Cowboy hats, dents on

Cows

calves and
milking positions
nose rings and
sticking of tongues up nostrils of

CPR training in schools

Crabs, hermit, “bathroom habits” of

Crackling sound of fire

Cracks on sidewalks

Cranes, construction, assembling of

“Craps”

Cravings, food, pregnant women and

Credit card receipts, printing of, at gas stations

Credit card slips, and phone numbers

Credit cards

and waiter tips
dipping versus swiping and
major versus minor
quick swiping of

Crickets

chapped legs and chirping
chirping at night of

“Crisscross”

“Crocodile” shirts

Crowd estimates, police and

Crowing of roosters

Cruise controls, minimum speeds of

Crying at happy endings

Cue balls, dots on, in pool

Cups

drinking, width of
shape of paper and plastic

Curad bandages, wrappers of

Curly tails of pigs

Currency, color of

Cursive handwriting versus printing, teaching of

Curves on highways

“Cut and dried”

“Cut the mustard”

Cuts, paper, pain and

Daily doubles in
Jeopardy
, difficulty of

Dalmatians in firehouses

Dams, beavers and

Dance studios, floor location of

Dancing, men versus women

“Dandelion”

“Dangerous Curve” signs, placement of

Dartboards, numbering schemes of

DC, AC and

De Paul University and “Blue Demons”

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