Doctor Zhivago (24 page)

“It’s doubtful. But God grant it.”

“I’ll tell them: ‘Brothers, look at me. See how I, an only son, the hope of the family, with no regrets, sacrificed my name, my position, my parents’ love, in order to gain freedom for you, the like of which no other people in the world enjoys. I did it, and so did many young men, to say nothing of the old guard of our glorious predecessors, of the hard-labor populists and the People’s Will Schlüsselburgers.
⁸
Were we doing it for ourselves? Did we need that? You’re no longer rank-and-file soldiers as before, but warriors of the world’s first revolutionary army. Ask yourselves honestly, are you worthy of that lofty title? At a time when your motherland, bleeding profusely, makes a last effort to shake off the enemy that has twined around her like a hydra, you let yourselves be stupefied by a gang of obscure adventurers and turned into irresponsible riffraff, a mob of unbridled scoundrels, glutted with freedom, for whom whatever they’re given is always too little, just like that pig—sit him at a table and he’ll put his feet on it—oh, I’ll get to them, I’ll shame them!”

“No, no, it’s risky,” the district tried to object, furtively exchanging meaningful glances with his assistant.

Galiullin tried to talk the commissar out of his insane plan. He knew the daredevils of the 212th from the division their regiment belonged to, in which he had once served himself. But the commissar would not listen to him.

Yuri Andreevich kept trying all the while to get up and leave. The commissar’s naïveté embarrassed him. But the sly knowingness of the district and his assistant, two jeering and underhanded finaglers, was not much better. The foolishness and the craftiness were worthy of each other. And all of it—superfluous, nonexistent, lackluster, which life itself so longs to avoid—spewed out in a torrent of words.

Oh, how one wants sometimes to go from such giftlessly high-flown, cheerless human wordiness into the seeming silence of nature, into the arduous soundlessness of long, persistent labor, into the wordlessness of deep sleep, of true music, and of a quiet, heartfelt touch grown mute from fullness of soul!

The doctor remembered that he still faced a talk with Antipova, unpleasant in any case. He was glad of the necessity to see her, even at that price. But it was unlikely that she had come back yet. Taking advantage of the first appropriate moment, the doctor got up and inconspicuously left the office.

As it happened, she was already at home. The doctor was informed of her arrival by Mademoiselle, who added that Larissa Fyodorovna had come back tired, quickly eaten supper, and gone to her room, asking not to be disturbed.

“But knock at her door,” Mademoiselle advised. “She’s probably not asleep yet.”

“And how do I find her?” asked the doctor, causing unutterable astonishment in Mademoiselle with the question.

It turned out that Antipova was lodged at the end of the upstairs corridor, next to the rooms where all of Zhabrinskaya’s belongings were locked away, and where the doctor had never been.

Meanwhile it was quickly getting dark. The streets contracted. Houses and fences huddled together in the evening darkness. From the depths of the courtyards, trees came up to the windows, to the light of the burning lamps. It was a hot and sultry night. Every movement made one break into a sweat. Strips of kerosene light, falling into the yard, ran down the tree trunks in streams of dirty perspiration.

At the last step, the doctor stopped. He thought that even to knock at the door of a person tired out from traveling was awkward and importunate. It would be better to put off the talk until the next day. In distraction, which always accompanies a change of mind, he walked to the other end of the corridor. There was a window there that gave onto the neighboring courtyard. The doctor leaned out.

The night was filled with soft, mysterious sounds. Close by in the corridor, water was dripping from a washstand, measuredly, with pauses. There was whispering somewhere behind a window. Somewhere, where the kitchen garden began, beds of cucumbers were being watered, water was being poured from one bucket into another, with a clink of the chain drawing it from the well.

It smelled of all the flowers in the world at once, as if the earth had lain unconscious during the day and was now coming to consciousness through all these scents. And from the countess’s centuries-old garden, so littered with windfallen twigs and branches that it had become impassable, there drifted, as tall as the trees, enormous as the wall of a big house, the dusty, thickety fragrance of an old linden coming into bloom.

Shouts came from the street beyond the fence to the right. A soldier on leave was acting up there, doors slammed, snippets of some song beat their wings.

Beyond the crow’s nests of the countess’s garden appeared a blackish purple moon of monstrous dimensions. At first it looked like the brick steam mill in Zybushino; then it turned yellow like the Biriuchi railway pump house.

And below, in the courtyard under the window, the scent of showy four o’clocks mingled with the sweet smell of fresh hay, like tea with flowers. Earlier a cow, bought in a far-off village, had been brought here. She had been led all day, was tired, missed the herd she had left, and refused to take food from the hands of her new mistress, whom she had not yet grown used to.

“Now, now, don’t be naughty, Bossie, I’ll teach you to butt, you devil,” the mistress admonished her in a whisper, but the cow either tossed her head angrily or stretched her neck and mooed rendingly and pitifully, while beyond the black sheds of Meliuzeevo the stars twinkled, and from them to the cow stretched threads of invisible compassion, as if they were the cattle yards of other worlds, where she was pitied.

Everything around fermented, grew, and rose on the magic yeast of being. The rapture of life, like a gentle wind, went in a broad wave, not noticing where, over the earth and the town, through walls and fences, through wood and flesh, seizing everything with trembling on its way. To stifle the effect of this current, the doctor went to the platz to listen to the talk at the meeting.

The moon was already high in the sky. Everything was flooded by its light, thick as spilled white lead.

By the porches of the official stone buildings with columns that surrounded the square, their wide shadows lay on the ground like black carpets.

The meeting was taking place on the opposite side of the square. If one
wished, one could listen and make out everything that was being said across the platz. But it was the magnificence of the spectacle that fascinated the doctor. He sat down on a bench by the gates of the fire brigade, without paying attention to the voices heard across the street, and began to look around.

From all sides, obscure little streets flowed into the square. Deep down them one could see decrepit, lopsided little houses. The mud was as impassable in these little streets as in a village. From the mud long fences of woven willow withes stuck up, looking like nets thrown into a pond or baskets for catching crayfish.

In the little houses, the glass in the frames of the open windows gleamed weak-sightedly. From the front gardens, sweaty, fair-haired corn reached into the rooms, its silks and tassels gleaming as if they were oiled. From behind the sagging wattle fences, pale, lean mallows gazed solitarily into the distance, looking like farm women whom the heat had driven out of the stuffy cottages in their nightshirts for a breath of fresh air.

The moonlit night was astounding, like mercy or the gift of clairvoyance, and suddenly, into the silence of this bright, scintillating fairy tale, the measured, clipped sounds of someone’s voice, familiar, as if just heard, began to fall. The voice was beautiful, fervent, and breathed conviction. The doctor listened and at once recognized who it was. It was the commissar Gintz. He was speaking on the square.

The local powers had probably asked him to support them with his authority, and he, with great feeling, was reproaching the Meliuzeevans for being disorganized, for succumbing too easily to the corrupting influence of the Bolsheviks, the real perpetrators, he insisted, of the Zybushino events. In the same spirit as he had spoken at the military superior’s, he reminded them of the cruel and powerful enemy and the hour of trial that had struck for the motherland. Midway through his speech, he began to be interrupted.

Requests not to interrupt the speaker alternated with shouts of disagreement. The expressions of protest became louder and more frequent. Someone who accompanied Gintz and for the moment took upon himself the task of chairman shouted that remarks from the audience were not allowed and called for order. Some demanded that a citizeness from the crowd be given the floor, others hissed and asked them not to interfere.

A woman was making her way through the crowd towards the upside-down box that served as a platform. She had no intention of getting onto the box, but having squeezed her way there, she stood beside it. The woman was known. Silence fell. The woman held the attention of the crowding people. It was Ustinya.

“Zybushino, you were saying, comrade commissar, and then concerning eyes, you were saying, we must have eyes and not fall into deception, and yet you yourself, I listened to you, only know how to carp at us with your Bolsheviks and Mensheviks—Bolsheviks and Mensheviks, that’s all we hear from you.
⁹
But that there’ll be no more war and everything will be like between brothers, that’s called God’s way and not the Mensheviks’, and that the mills and factories go to the poor, that again is not the Bolsheviks, but human pity. And the deaf-mute gets thrown in our faces without you, I’m sick of hearing it. What is he to you, really! Have you got something against him? That he went around mute all the time, and then suddenly up and spoke without asking anybody? Never saw the like, eh? Well, there’s been even better! That famous she-ass, for instance. ‘Balaam, Balaam,’ she says, ‘I ask you honestly, don’t go there, you’ll be sorry.’
¹⁰
Well, sure enough, he didn’t listen and went. Like you saying, ‘A deaf-mute.’ He thinks, ‘Why listen to her—she’s an ass, an animal.’ He scorned the brute. And how he repented later. But you surely know how it ended.”

“How?” someone in the public became curious.

“All right!” barked Ustinya. “Ask me no questions, I’ll tell you no lies.”

“No, that’s no good. Tell us how.” The same voice would not quiet down.

“How, how—you stick like a thistle! He turned into a pillar of salt.”

“Nice try, dearie! That was Lot. Lot’s wife,”
¹¹
shouts rang out. Everyone laughed. The chairman called the assembly to order. The doctor went to bed.

The next day he saw Antipova. He found her in the butler’s pantry. Before Larissa Fyodorovna lay a pile of laundry. She was ironing.

The pantry was one of the back rooms on the upper floor, and it gave onto the garden. In it samovars were prepared, food delivered on the dumbwaiter from the kitchen was put on plates, dirty dishes were sent down to be washed. In the pantry the material accounts of the hospital were kept. In it dishes and linen were checked against the lists, people rested during their time off and arranged meetings with each other.

The windows on the garden were open. The pantry smelled of linden blossoms, the caraway bitterness of dry twigs, as in old parks, and slightly of coal gas from the two irons, which Larissa Fyodorovna used alternately, putting now one, now the other into the ventilation pipe to fire them up again.

“Why didn’t you knock on my door yesterday? Mademoiselle told me.
Anyhow, you did the right thing. I was already in bed and couldn’t have let you in. Well, hello. Be careful, don’t get yourself dirty. There’s coal spilled here.”

“You’re obviously ironing for the whole hospital?”

“No, a lot of it is mine. So you’ve been teasing me that I’ll never get out of here. But this time I’m serious. See, I’m getting ready, packing. I’ll pack up—and be off. I to the Urals, and you to Moscow. And then one day they’ll ask Yuri Andreevich: ‘Have you ever heard of the little town of Meliuzeevo?’ ‘Not that I recall.’ ‘And who is this Antipova?’ ‘I have no idea.’ ”

“Well, that’s unlikely. How was your trip around the rural areas? Is it nice in the country?”

“I can’t put it in a couple of words. How quickly the irons get cold! Give me a new one, please, if you don’t mind. There, sticking in the ventilation pipe. And this one goes back into the pipe. So. Thank you. Villages differ. It all depends on the inhabitants. In some the people are hardworking, industrious. There it’s all right. But in others there must be nothing but drunkards. There it’s desolation. It’s frightening to look at.”

“Don’t be silly. What drunkards? A lot you understand. There’s simply nobody there, the men have all been taken as soldiers. Well, all right. And how is the zemstvo, the new revolutionary one?”

“You’re not right about the drunkards, I disagree with you. And the zemstvo? There will be a long torment with the zemstvo. The instructions are inapplicable, there’s nobody to work with in the rural areas. At the moment all the peasants are interested in is the land question.
¹²
I went to Razdolnoe. What beauty! You should go there. In the spring there was a bit of burning and looting. A barn burned down, the fruit trees got charred, part of the façade is damaged by soot. I didn’t get to Zybushino, didn’t have time. But everywhere they assure you that the deaf-mute isn’t made up. They describe his appearance. They say he’s young, educated.”

“Last night Ustinya laid herself out for him on the platz.”

“I only just came back, and again there was a whole cartload of junk from Razdolnoe. I’ve begged them so many times to leave us in peace. As if we don’t have enough of our own! And this morning guards came from the commandant’s with a note from the district. They desperately need the countess’s silver tea service and crystal. Just for one evening, to be returned. We know their ‘to be returned.’ Half of the things will be missing. For a party, they say. Some sort of visitor.”

“Ah, I can guess who. A new frontline commissar has come. I saw him by chance. He’s preparing to take on the deserters, surround them and disarm them. The commissar is still quite green, an infant in practical matters. The
locals suggest using Cossacks, but he thinks he can take them with tears. He says the people are children, and so on, and he thinks it’s all children’s games. Galiullin begs him, says don’t awaken the sleeping beast, leave it to us, but you can’t argue with such a man once something’s lodged in his head. Listen. Leave your irons for a moment and listen. There’s going to be an unimaginable scramble here soon. It’s not in our power to prevent it. How I wish you’d be gone before the mess begins!”