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Authors: Mickey Spillane

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“This better be important, Pat,” I said, leaning on an elbow now.

“Oh, it’s important,” an unfamiliar voice said. A quiet, calm voice, male, medium-pitched, almost soothing, like a late night disc jockey playing the kind of records that helped insomniacs finally drift off.

But I was wide awake, and sitting up.

“Okay, buddy,” I said. “You got two choices—hang up and never call this number again, or give me a name and a reason for calling in the middle of the night.”

“Technically it’s morning,” the soothing voice said. “But I hope you won’t hang up. It’s time we talked. It’s really time.”

“Who is this?”

“An admirer. Oh, I know Mr. Woodcock was an admirer of your work, too, and I rather suspect that got in the way of him carrying out his assignment properly.”

Nothing like that had been in the papers.

I gave Velda a bug-eyed look, and covered the mouthpiece, whispering harshly, “Get the extension.”

She slipped out of bed and ran off to get the phone on the kitchenette wall.

“Is that Miss Sterling picking up another line?” he asked. “I’m a big fan of yours, as well, Velda… if I may. And Mike… again, if I
may
… I hope you know how lucky you are to have someone like Velda in your life. That’s something I’ve never had, never enjoyed.”

“What do you want?”

“Just to talk to you. I think it’s time I let you know what exactly is going on.”

“Why don’t you?”

“If you heard my name, it would mean nothing. And if I were to give you a list of those I’ve killed…
personally
killed… you would quickly put together that none of these homicides were ever connected by law enforcement. They have no idea of my existence. And many of my contracts… because I am the premiere contract killer who ever walked this dark, sad, miserable excuse for a planet… a good number were written off as accidents. But that’s not a fitting fate for you. Not for Mike Hammer. You’ve killed so
many
. In some respects I’m a piker, compared to you. That’s the point.”

If he’d called the office, I could have hit a switch and recorded the call. But he knew not to call there. Worse, he had Velda’s number. Neither of us were listed. Bad. Very bad.

“What
is
the point?” I asked.

“I’m going to be… retiring soon. I have been looking for a challenge, one last… not job, but kill… to feel, to
know
, that I’ve gone out on top. That no one was in my league, my class. So naturally you’ve been on my mind, Mike.”

“So this is no contract somebody took out on me. Just a lunatic at work.”

“No need to insult me, Mike. We’re never going to be friends, I realize, but we can certainly be colleagues in our shared pursuit. Friendly adversaries, let’s say, each with the proper respect for the other. I’m a killer, Mike, and you’re a killer, so we are brothers in blood. Do you understand?”

“I’m starting to.”

“As it happens, my decision was made for me by fate. Do you believe in fate, Mike? In destiny?”

“I call it kismet.”

“Ah. How poetic. Well, at the very time, very
moment
I was thinking of… let’s call it
challenging
you to a kind of game of wits, a duel of giants… I was approached by an individual who wanted you dead. Imagine that! Is this the hand of someone bigger than either of us, moving chess pieces? Are we merely pawns in some grander game than we can comprehend? Be that as it may, when I was hired to kill you, I knew I was meant to determine which of us was the killer among the killers. Like they say at the prize fights, Mike—the cham-
peen
.”

“Then why send Woodcock, and these other two clowns? Why the bogus robbery today?”

“I have my ways and I have my reasons.”

“What are they?”

“Well… as for the other three instances, I wanted to determine whether you were worthy of my challenge. If a journeyman contract man had no trouble wiping you out, well… you wouldn’t be worthy of my attention. So I’ve dispatched three such men… and you’ve dispatched
them
. I’m coming to the conclusion that you are indeed worthy.”

“Thanks. So let’s meet somewhere and see how this plays out. Or is your idea of a ‘challenge’ to shoot from a rooftop?”

“Are you suggesting there should be
rules
here? Now that’s disappointing. The great rule-breaker wants rules! No, it could come at any time, Mike. You should look up, down and around and behind you. Just know that if you look behind you, I’ll tag you from the front.”

And he clicked off.

CHAPTER SEVEN

At P.J. Moriarty’s steak and chop house on Sixth and Fifty-second, Velda and I sat in the bar across from Hy Gardner in a booth we were lucky to have. Mid-evening, the endless line of stools was full and the restaurant beyond was hopping, producing a drone of conversation punctuated by clinking glass and an occasional dropped dish, making for real privacy.

We ate first and talked no business. My kind of business, like what had happened yesterday afternoon in an elegant suite at the Waldorf-Astoria, did not make for polite table talk, even in my circles.

Then we settled in for drinks and the real reason I’d called this meeting. And I didn’t even have to call it to order.

“I made a few more inquiries,” Hy said, a tumbler of bourbon in one hand, a plump cigar in the other. The way he was peering at me over the glasses said he’d really come up with something.

I’d already filled him in on the phone about the party crasher at the bridal shower, giving him more than the papers had.

The columnist’s blue suit and darker blue tie were typically crisp, but his face sagged from a long day. In addition to making long-distance calls for me, he’d been in his suite at the Plaza since breakfast, interviewing Broadway actors and directors about their upcoming productions.

“Your client Leif Borensen has what we call in the newspaper trade ‘hidden levels,’” he said. “And I’m not talking about depth of character. More like the show business equivalent of cover stories.”

“Like the starlet who was a straight-A schoolgirl from Topeka,” I said, “but really a B-girl from Boston. That kind of level?”

He nodded, tamped cigar ash into a PJM glass tray. “Only in this case we’re talking about a rich aunt who died but was never alive in the first place.”

The rich aunt bit had always seemed too convenient to me.

“If a windfall inheritance didn’t fund his real estate schemes,” Velda said, leaning forward, “who
did
back Borensen?”

“Before I deal with that,” Hy said, exhaling smoke that had been in Havana before it made it to his lungs, “let me ask you both a question. How hard is it to raise money for independent movie productions?”

“Plenty hard,” I said. “And a pain in the tail. You have to go around begging nickels and dimes from dentists and doctors or maybe actual rich relatives.”

Velda put in, “Or if you already have a track record, you might scrounge up some advance sales from distributors based on a scary, sexy poster for a picture that hasn’t rolled film yet.”

“There’s another way,” Hy said, and a smile curled on that glum, anteater mug of his. “We have a group of individuals right here in Manhattan who
often
invest in motion pictures, particularly independent ones.”

And I got it right away. “Mob money.”

Velda got it, too, and snapped her fingers. “Borensen was a money laundry!”

Hy nodded sagely. “That’s the word I get. And he still
is
, as far as I can tell. The handy thing about the movie business, and television syndication as well, is that you can exaggerate the money you lose, or inflate the money you make, according to which way the wind is blowing.”

“Ideal set-up,” I said.

Hy went on: “And Borensen did a lot of his own distribution, to drive-ins with the flicks, and to local TV stations with his syndicated shows. Even a correspondence school accountant would find cooking those kind of books about as tricky as boiling water.”

I asked, “How did a smalltime New York actor get in bed with the lasagna lads in the first place?”

Hy sipped some bourbon before answering. “Well, as we know, back when he was starting out, Borensen was not exactly giving Brando and James Dean much competition. But he worked steady enough, and had access enough, on both stage and small screen… and a lot of TV was in New York back then, remember… to support himself with a profitable sideline.”

“Drug dealer,” I said.

Hy smiled a little, impressed by my perspicacity. He said, “Like the old ladies down in Florida say, bingo. Grass and pills and, who knows, maybe coke and heroin. My info isn’t that specific on that particular, uh, score.”

Frowning, Velda asked, “Is this theory or fact?”

“I have it on good authority it’s fact,” Hy said. “But I had to dig for it
and
call in some markers. This is anything but public knowledge back in L.A. And those in the know usually keep such things to themselves, or at most refer to them vaguely.”

“Show business has a long history,” I said, “of looking the other way where mob funding is concerned.”

Velda smirked. “Just ask the headliners in Vegas.”

They were piping in Sinatra right now.

Hy said, “Borensen’s move back to New York may mean he’s splitting from the boys, and going legit. Or he could be expanding operations for them. Either way you slice it, hooking up with Martin Foster, and now tying the knot with the late Foster’s successful actress of a daughter? That’s a big, a
very
big, step up for our golden boy in the producing game.”

“If I’d been butting heads with the Mulberry Street crowd lately,” I said, “I’d think Borensen’s been setting me up for them.”

Velda said, “Our man Leif was certainly in a position to do that. In these most recent two instances, he knew right where you’d be, Mike—first with the meeting at his apartment house, then with the bridal shower.”

Hy was staring me down. “Mike—is there something you’re not thinking of? Something involving the mob that might prompt them to use Borensen to tee you up for a hole in one?”

I shrugged. “I don’t see what. These days I’m strictly a working P.I., pursuing no grudges and not generating any, either.”

Velda said, “There
must
be
something
.”

I shrugged again and looked across the booth at my old friend.

“Well…” Hy started. He paused and stared into his thoughts, flicking off further expensive, illegal ash from his cigar. “…it’s a little thing, but there might be one item of interest. Of possible pertinence. But I don’t see the connection to you, Mike.”

“Let me be the judge,” I said.

The columnist grunted a laugh. “Why not? You’ve been the jury often enough.”

That made Velda smile.

He sipped a little bourbon. “I know this oldtime PR guy… well,
knew
him, he’s dead now… who was working on the story of his life. We went way back, and he used to feed me items, so… Anyway, last year, before the
Trib
closed its doors, he called wanting to have lunch with me. I said great, love to, talk old times and so on. In a way I hated it, though, because I’d have to lie to him about what a fine idea writing a book on his life story was. Either that, or break it to him that he was just another nobody who nobody heard of, who thinks his life mattered. I mean, how do you break it to a guy who fought his way across Europe that Audie Murphy beat him to it? Like people were out there just waiting with bated breath to read the life story of somebody they never heard of.”

As Hy paused for another sip of bourbon, Velda asked, “And was that the case with your old friend?”

He shook his head. “Not at all. I couldn’t have been wronger. This was a guy who spent forty years in the trenches of the New York show business scene, and he knew where all the bodies were buried, and who put them there. Everything from abortions to homosexuality to… mob ties. I warned him there could be legal repercussions, or
worse
… but he said at his age, he didn’t give a damn. Anyway, he was going to back up his memories with some hard research, to make sure the lawyers wouldn’t be scared off and a publisher would take it on.”

I asked, “Did he know Borensen back when?”

Hy shrugged, made a face, tamped more ash. “That’s what makes this a little thin, Mike. I don’t know for sure, but he would almost
have
to have known Borensen, and certainly knew
of
him. And with something as damning as drug dealing in his past, and mob money laundering ever since, Borensen would
flip
if he found out Dick was writing a tell-all.”

I leaned forward. “
Dick?
That wouldn’t be Dick Blazen, would it?”

“Right. Did you know the guy, Mike?”

I put out my Lucky. “No, but a friend of mine did.”

Velda asked, “‘
Did
’? Past tense?”

“Very damn past,” I said to her. “That’s the regular customer who got run down in front of Billy Batson’s newsstand last month.”

I filled in some blanks for him on the incident—all Hy knew was that Blazen had been hit by a car—including Billy getting a good look at the driver but having no success identifying him, despite numerous line-ups at HQ and going through countless mug books.

Hy rested his cigar in the ashtray and leaned on an elbow. He was peering over the glasses again. “Are you thinking Borensen may have hired a contract killer to remove Dick Blazen? A hit-and-run for hire?”

“Why not?”

My phone caller of the night before had made a point of saying many of his contract kills had been passed off as accidents.

I continued, “On the other hand, maybe Borensen pulled that one off himself.”

“If so,” Velda said, “all we have to do is show Billy a picture of our client.”

Hy said, “Easier said than done. One of the things Dick asked me to help him with was finding pics of various lesser-known but key people he was mentioning in his book. He already had art on many of them, but Borensen was on a short list that Dick needed help with. I checked the
Trib
photo morgue and came up a goose egg. I called around to the other papers and nobody else had anything on the guy either.”

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