Don't Read in the Closet: Volume Four (117 page)

“Yeah, okay.” Tristan pulled his second sock on. He’d left his

shoes by the door, and he stood to go. “See you, Cody.” And then he

was gone, out the bedroom door, down the short hall to the outside

door of the apartment. Cody waited and listened, and when he heard

the door shut with a soft click, he let himself slide down into the bed.

His apartment had never felt so empty.

****

and he didn’t like the hats. Cody wasn’t too surprised. A lot of people

weren’t crazy about them, at first. “Doesn’t it just feed into the

stereotype? Gay men are predators, right? The poor innocent straight

guys need to be protected from our endless harassment.”

Cody shook his head. “No, it’s not like that. Seriously.” He looked

across the bar at the two guys watching the big screen TV. They were

both wearing bright red baseball caps with the words ‘Don’t bother -

I’m straight’ written on them. Cody could see how someone might get

the wrong impression. “It’s a service to the gay customers. Well, to

Tristan, mostly…”

Seth raised an eyebrow.

“When he opened this place, he wanted it to be somewhere that

he’d want to hang out. He likes guys, and he likes sports. So it’s a gay

sports bar. Makes sense, right? But it’s also the
best
sports bar in the

Don’t Read in the Closet – volume four 714

area, so he ended up getting a lot of straight guys coming in. Not the

homophobic assholes, just guys who want to watch the game on a big

screen with good food and cheap beer.” Cody paused to see Seth’s

reaction.

“Okay…”

“But it’s Tristan, right? And his friends. So there was a pretty

good pick-up scene going on. And it was getting pretty frustrating,

because guys were buying drinks for guys, spending some serious

time talking to them — and then finding out that they were straight.

Super inefficient.” Cody had always thought the hat plan was pretty

ingenious, but he was beginning to wonder if maybe he had

misjudged. Seth was working on his PhD in the same department

where Cody was getting his Masters; Seth was pretty damned smart,

and he didn’t seem too impressed. Still, Cody kept trying. “So he

found somewhere that makes hats for cheap, and he offers them for

free to anyone who orders a pitcher, or a meal, or something. They’ve

got the bar’s name on the back, so they’re good advertising, not too

expensive. And the regulars just bring their own hats back each time.”

Cody knew he’d made the best case he could, but Seth still looked

vaguely disapproving, and the familiar tension began to spread

through Cody’s body. He was trying so hard to make this work. He

wasn’t over Tristan yet, not by a long shot, so it wasn’t fair to expect

Seth to make him happy.
Nobody
could make him happy, not yet. But

he wished he was doing a better job of being who Seth wanted him to

be.

“It wouldn’t have been easier to have communicated in words? If

these guys aren’t able to speak to each other, should they really be

thinking about having sex with each other?” Seth smiled gently. “
We

managed to find each other without silly hats, didn’t we?”

Cody nodded, and he was reassured when Seth reached under the

table to find his hand, holding it softly. Maybe he hadn’t messed

things up too badly. But then Seth kept going. “Now, what do you

Don’t Read in the Closet – volume four 715

suppose our chances are of finding something to eat here that isn’t

dripping with grease?”

“Pretty good, I’d say.” It was Tristan, notepad in hand, standing

by their table. He didn’t usually serve customers, but he generally

took Cody’s orders; it made it easier to suggest weird, creative

additions to the food, some of which ended up being totally delicious.

“Our grilled salmon is pretty popular with people watching their

weight. The pasta is good if you’re not going low carb, and the roast

chicken breast isn’t exciting, but it’s pretty healthy.” Tristan’s smile

was hard to read. “You’ll want to stay away from the nachos, though.”

The nachos. Cody’s favorite, as Tristan knew very well. Another

one of Tristan’s stupid little digs at this relationship. It had been

almost a month since Cody had made his decision, and things with

Tristan had been fine, on the surface, but not quite right underneath.

In the past, they’d always supported each other’s attempts at romance,

even those that kept them out of each other’s beds. But this time, it

seemed like Tristan had decided that Seth wasn’t good for Cody.

Which wasn’t fair, at all, because Tristan had only seen Seth in a very

limited set of circumstances. At house parties, or out goofing around

with the guys, and now, in a damn sports bar; all the places that

Tristan was comfortable, but Seth clearly wasn’t. So, yeah, maybe

Seth came across as being a bit stuffy, but that didn’t mean he was

always like that.

But he wasn’t really doing too much to help himself in the current

situation. “Salmon?” Seth smiled across the table at Cody. “Do you

think it will compare to the exquisite flavors we were treated to last

night at Anton’s?”

Cody was fighting to find an answer, to figure out the words that

would defend Tristan without angering Seth, but Tristan was too

quick for him. “Don’t think I’ve ever heard our salmon called

‘exquisite’, man. We hear ‘fucking good’ pretty often, but that’s a bit

different. Do you guys want some time to think it over?”

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Seth squeezed Cody’s fingers just a little too tight. “Actually, I

think I’ll visit the bathroom; Cody, why don’t you order for me? You

know the menu, right? I mean, coming here was
your
idea, after all.”

He stood up and edged out past Tristan, who didn’t move aside quite

as much as he probably should have. “I’m sure you’ll find the best

choice.” And he was gone. The tension in Cody’s guts flared. Another

damned test. And given that Seth had already made it clear that the

menu was beneath him, it was another damned test that Cody was

destined to fail.

Tristan slid into Seth’s abandoned chair, and stared across the

table meaningfully. “You’re sure about this guy, Cody?” He squirmed

a little, as if deciding how much to say. “He’s — really?
He’s
what you

want? I mean —
he’s
the guy who makes you decide to quit you-and-

me?” He caught himself. “Shit, no, sorry. That’s not what I meant.

This isn’t about that. This is just about
you
, okay? I’m just trying to be

a friend.”

Cody tried to fight the emotion back, but he wasn’t totally

successful. “It’s totally about you and me,” he practically hissed. “I

can’t — if this doesn’t work with Seth, I’m just going to fall right back

into that shit with you, and it’s going nowhere! I want something to go

somewhere, Tristan. Keeping everything casual was great, when I was

a kid, but I want something more, now.”

Tristan nodded slowly. “Okay. Okay, yeah, but not just for the

sake of it. Like…” He ran his hand over his face in his familiar

gesture of frustration. “You shouldn’t be with an asshole, just to stay

away from me. If you want — I mean, if it helps, I can just say no.

We’re done. I don’t care if you’re with someone or not, you and me

are
not
fucking around anymore. Okay?” Tristan cast a furtive glance

over his shoulder toward the bathroom, and then turned back, looking

as tense as Cody felt. “Or, you know… if… I mean, if it’s just a

relationship that you want… we could try that. You and me. I mean,

you’re my best friend, right? And the sex is awesome. That sounds

like a pretty solid start to something…”

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“Fuck you, Tristan,” Cody said, and stood up so quickly that his

chair almost fell over. He needed to get the hell out of there. “I don’t

need your
pity
. You don’t need to do me a fucking
favor
, okay?” He

gripped the side of the table and tried to collect his thoughts, but he

didn’t have much luck. “You think that’s what I want? To be your

fucking ball and chain?” He shook his head emphatically. “How’s that

going to end? How long ‘til you see some hot piece of ass you can’t

resist, and we end up destroying a friendship that’s lasted for eighteen

fucking years?”

“Everything all right here?” Seth sounded more amused than

concerned as he stepped up to them. “Anything I can do to help?”

“Yeah,” Tristan said. “Could you just give us a couple minutes?

We’re kind of in the middle of something.”

Seth drew his head back in exaggerated surprise. It would have

been funny, if his eyes weren’t so cold. “Oh, are you?” He turned to

Cody. “Is that what you’d like, Cody? This ‘couple minutes’ plan

doesn’t sound quite right to me — I don’t think I’ll go on a date with

someone and then step aside for a couple minutes while he chats with

an old boyfriend. So if I go, it’ll be for the evening. Maybe for good.”

Cody really hadn’t needed the ultimatum, or the extra pressure.

“Seth, it’s fine. We’re done here. Why don’t we find somewhere else

for dinner?”

“Cody,” Tristan started, but he stopped when he saw Cody’s

expression. He stood still as if he was trying to figure out what to do,

then stepped backward, out of their way, a helpless look on his face.

Cody fought to overcome the almost instinctive urge to reach out to

his friend and help him out. That wasn’t working for Cody. He had to

stop.

“Let’s go,” Seth said, and he rested his hand on Cody’s shoulder

and guided him out of the bar.

Neither of them said anything as they walked to the car and

climbed in, and Cody didn’t even think to ask where they were going.

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He wasn’t too surprised when they pulled into the parking spot behind

his apartment. “We need to talk,” Seth said quietly. “We should go

upstairs.”

Cody nodded. He wasn’t exactly sure what they were going to talk

about, but at least he knew he’d done nothing wrong. He started up

the wooden staircase that ran up the outside of the house; his

apartment was in the attic. Seth was right behind him. Cody got to the

top and patted his pockets, looking for his keys, and Seth nudged his

shoulder. More than a nudge, really — more like a shove.

“Let’s go, Cody. Stop stalling.”

“Stalling? No, I’m just…”

“Open the fucking door, Cody.” There was something in Seth’s

voice that Cody hadn’t heard before. It was chilling.

“What’s going on, man? I mean — what are you pissed about?”

“I’m pissed because you’re twenty-three years old and you can’t

open a fucking
door
, Cody. I’m pissed because you were flirting with

your boyfriend right in front of me, and now you’re trying to pretend

nothing happened!” Seth’s voice had started as a hiss, but by the end,

he was yelling. Cody was pretty sure it wouldn’t be a good idea to let

the guy into his apartment.

“I wasn’t flirting, Seth. And he’s not my boyfriend.” Cody didn’t

really have an answer for the bit about the door; he’d found his keys,

and he totally
could
open it now, but he figured he’d wait a bit. “Do

you want to go for a walk, or something? You’re pretty wired.”

Seth wasn’t that much bigger than Cody, but Cody wasn’t

expecting the punch. He managed to duck a little, so that Seth’s fist

caught him on the temple instead of the cheek. And maybe that hurt

Seth a little, because he yelled like he’d been stabbed, and then both

hands were locked around the back of Cody’s head, pulling his face

down into the knee that Seth raised up like a reverse sledge hammer.

Cody felt the pain explode out from his nose, and he couldn’t see

properly. Everything was happening way too fast, and for no damned

Don’t Read in the Closet – volume four 719