Down the Dirt Road (22 page)

    The air inside was cool, Momma must have been running the air conditioning.  October had been an unseasonably warm month with Indian summer in full force.  The house was almost eerily quiet, maybe Momma and Uncle Tommy were out in the back yard.  Jennie made her way to the kitchen, dropping the package on the counter and heading out back to look for her missing relatives.

     The back yard was as still and quiet as the house.  A glance toward the barn confirmed all was quiet there as well.  Where could they be?

     Jennie went back in the house and headed upstairs to her room to change in to an old pair of cutoffs and a different tee shirt.  As she passed her mother’s room, she stopped suddenly at the sound of a giggle coming from the other side of the door.  Moving on tip toe, she inched closer to her mother’s room and placed her ear up to the space between the door and the jamb.  Quiet voices, one of them the decidedly male voice of her uncle wafted toward her
ear.  Giddy laughter, although quiet, gave away to Jennie exactly what was happening on the other side of that door.

    “Eww…” She mumbled to herself as she tip toed back down the hall toward the steps.  It was obvious they had no idea she had come home so she went back outside.  Stomping her feet against the wood steps and porch
as loud as she could, she made a big production of opening the front door and calling out loudly, “Momma! I’m home!  I have your medications!”

     A loud thump from over her head in the general direction of Momma’s room made her laugh.  Picturing her Momma and Uncle Tommy as two clumsy kids fumbling around for clothing and looking for a graceful way to exit the room struck her as quite funny- despite the fact that she wasn’t exactly sure how she felt about her mother and her uncle being intimate in the first place.

    “Jennie girl, that you down there?”  Her mother’s voice sounded a bit nervous and definitely a little guilty.

    “Yes, Momma!  It’s me!”

    “Meet me in the kitchen, sweet pea, I need to take my medications!”

    So, Momma was trying to hide Uncle Tommy from her by having her go to the kitchen and giving him a clear shot to the door.  Apparently they both had forgotten about the big black pick- up truck parked in the driveway.

    She humored her mother and headed into the kitchen, mostly because she wasn’t really ready to see them together after what she had heard upstairs in the hallway.

     Two sets of footsteps, her mother’s delicate ones and Uncle Tommy’s heavier boot-clad ones sounded on the steps but stopped at the front door.  Probably kissing goodbye; Jennie scrunched her nose in mild disgust at the
image that filled her mind of her mother making out with someone like a teenager.  Especially someone that wasn’t her father.

    When the front door closed, she walked over to the refrigerator and started rummaging for something to make for supper.  Momma was going to be hungry for a change.

     “So, Jennie girl, you sure were gone for a long time.  Was there trouble at the pharmacy?”

     “Nope.
  Well, sort of, I guess.  Nothing important.  Where’s Uncle Tommy.”

    “What do you mean?”  Momma answered innocently.  “I was upstairs resting.”

    “Funny, I was pretty sure that was his big, black truck I just parked next to in the driveway.”

     Momma’s cheeks flamed with embarrassment making Jennie chuckle.  “I don’t know what you mean.”  Her mother’s attempt at denial was even more entertaining to her. 

     “Come on, Momma.  I am twenty years old, you don’t have to protect me from things.  If you and Uncle Tommy want to… spend time together… then go ahead.  You are a grown woman.  And quite frankly, I would rather you be …
resting
… than sleeping your days away sick and depressed.”

   “Oh, Jennie, I’m so sorry!”  Instead of happy and relaxed like it should have been, her mother’s expression was full of anguish.  That wasn’t what she had expected from her mother at all, not under the present circumstances.

    “Sorry ‘bout what Momma?”  Jennie was genuinely confused.

     “I’m sorry for how hard the last two years have been on you.  If only I had known I was sick… and not just depressed over your father’s death, maybe things would have gotten better so much sooner.”

      “Oh, Momma!”  She crossed the room and grabbed her mother up in a gentle embrace allowing herself the luxury of a few tears as they held each other close.
  Finally Momma stepped back, her lashes still wet with tears.

    “I was sad and lonely without your father, I didn’t have a clue as to how to go on with my life.  Your uncle misses him as much as I do, he understands my sadness and he never … pressured me to do anything.  We are able to comfort each other because we both understand the depth of the loss of a spouse.  Until recently I was too sick and frail to have any interest in anything other than company.  I just kept waiting, hoping I would die too so I could be with your father.  But then the medicines made me feel so much better and I realized I didn’t want to throw the towel in quite so quickly after all.”

     “Why didn’t you tell me, Momma?  Maybe I could have helped, gotten you to a doctor or something.”

    “You were already so burdened, Jennie girl, that I thought I was doing you a favor by secluding myself in my room while nature ran its course.”

    “I need you Momma.  You know that, right?  Sick, healthy, in bed, out of bed, it doesn’t matter.  I don’t want to be alone in this world and right now, all I have is you.”

     “I’m not goin’ anywhere, at least not right now.  I’m not ready to leave you yet either.  And then there is your Uncle Tommy…”

     Elise broke into a huge smile as her cheeks colored a bright pink.  Jennie couldn’t help but laugh out loud, her mother looked like a teenager in puppy love.

     “It feels good to have someone, doesn’t it Momma?  I remember the feeling.  I was so happy when I was with Michael.”

      Suddenly remembering her run in with Trisha, she scowled slightly at the thought of the happy couple and their happy little family.  She was still surprised by Trisha’s comments although she shouldn’t have been.  It made sense that she would be so in love with the man when things were
going well but that at the first sign of adversity, Trisha would revert to her childish and selfish ways.

    Momma must have noticed her change in mood because she studied her daughter’s eyes carefully before she spoke, “Didn’t you say there was some trouble at the pharmacy today?”

   “Oh, it wasn’t really trouble.  I just ran into Trisha.”
    “I know how hard that must be for you.”

     “Seeing her isn’t as difficult as it used to be.  I am slowly coming to realize that Michael wasn’t right for me and that he and Trisha are actually perfect for each other.”

    “I am glad you have finally figured out what I have always known.”  Momma’s truthful words stung but the
y
weren’t meant to condemn, she was only speaking the truth and Jennie knew it
.

    “I guess it just hurt too much but that was a long time ago and I think I am finally over it.  Especially after talking to Trisha today.  She was upset with Michael for joining the Army because he might come home from Iraq a cripple and she doesn’t want to take care of a cripple all the rest of her life.
Can you believe that?”

     “Michael joined the Army?  Why?”  Momma was about as shocked as she herself had been when she first heard the news.

     “He and a bunch of the other boys joined up to go to Iraq and fight the terrorists.”

    “I can’t imagine that boy takin’ orders from anyone, let alone sleepin’ in a foxhole in the ground.” 

     “You never liked Michael very much, did you Momma?”

     “I liked him just fine, just didn’t see him as a good match for my only daughter.  Guess I was right ‘bout that, now wasn’t I?”

    Momma grinned like the Cheshire cat in the old
Alice in Wonderland
book Jennie had upstairs in her room, pleased with herself over her previous judgments.

        “I don’t think you will find anyone to be a good match for your only daughter.  Luckily for you I don’t have any prospects.  I am just destined to be alone.
”

     “Now I am not so sure ‘bout that, Jennie girl.  What about that handsome policeman who was at the hospital?”

       “Come on, Momma.  Grayson and I are as different as night and day.  Besides, I hear he’s shippin’ off to the Army too.”

      “Now there’s a cryin’ shame.  I was really hopin’ to get me some grandchildren before this Lupus has its way with me.”  Momma walked out of the kitchen as she spoke, leaving her parting comment just hanging in the air in her wake.

     Grandchildren?  Momma already had her married off to a man that wouldn’t even speak to her anymore.  How fitting for her life. 

     Thinking about Grayson alone in the desert fighting enemy forces made her stomach turn.  He would do it and he would do it with honor but she was pretty certain she wouldn’t sleep the entire time he was gone.

    
  Not that she had any right to worry.  She had made herself very clear that day on the porch when he poured his heart out and she didn’t even open the door.  She was beginning to think that she had made a mistake, letting him leave that day.  She wasn’t sure that she loved him the way he loved her but she wasn’t all together certain that she
couldn’t easily fall in love with him given the chance.  She would likely never know now.  War was a terrible thing and his chances of returning safe and unharmed might not be very good.  Especially since Grayson was exactly the sort of man that would throw himself on a grenade to save a buddy
or take a bullet to rescue a child
.  Exactly the kind of man that would be devoted and caring and love her like nobody else ever could.

20.

            
Local
Boys Make Stand Fo
r Freedom

     The front page headline was the first thing she saw when she grabbed the paper off the front porch.  It
had only been a couple of days
since her run in with Trisha.  It seemed to
o
soon, too fast for them to be leaving! 

     Try as she might, Jennie hadn’t run in to Grayson even once since that day.  He had to be avoiding her but for the life of her she couldn’t fathom why.  Before seeing Trisha it had seemed that Grayson was visible on every corner.

    Maybe he was busy now, preparing to leave for boot camp?
  What did it matter anyway?  He surely didn’t want
to be bothered by her, not after her behavior the last time they were together.  Besides, hadn’t she decided years ago relationships were messy and she had no time for any such thing in her life?

    Still, she spread the paper across the kitchen table and read every single word of the main article as well as each of the biographies for the soon to be soldiers, saving Grayson’s for last.
  The paper said there would be a parade that morning down Main Street honoring the young men as they prepared to leave for boot camp the next morning.  It was Saturday; there was no practical reason at all why she shouldn’t be able to attend.  She wanted very much to attend actually; maybe catch one final glimpse of the man she had dismissed so callously.  If she could see him one more time, make him understand her reasoning, maybe he would understand why she had done what she did and forgive her.  She didn’t want him burdened with anything unpleasant as he prepared to go to war. 
She
couldn’t stand the thought of him taking that with him to such a faraway place when there was no way of knowing if he would ever return.

    She had one more chance to make things right.  Hope
fully Grayson would let her at least apologize for the way she treated him.

    A quick glance of the clock told her she had just about an hour to get downtown and find her place along the parade route.  Without even stopping to tell Momma where she was going, she grabbed her keys and ran for her car.

    It took more than an hour for Jennie to navigate the t
raffic and find a place to park
her car.  Finally leaving it in t
he parking lot of the Catholic c
hurch, she ran the four blocks to Main Street praying she hadn’t missed the group of soon to be soldiers. 

     The high school marching band was playing a rousing rendition of the national anthem when Jennie finally made it to Main Street.  The police color guard marched in steady step behind the band.  Michael, Grayson and the other boys she had known most of her life walked and waved flags behind the color guard.  Jennie pushed her way through the crowd until she reached the curb- just in time to make eye contact with a very surprised Grayson Jennings.  She called out to him and waved but his surprise passed quickly as his
eyes took on a look of non-recognition and he proceeded on down the roadway with the other parade participants.