Down the Shore (23 page)

"Mom, it's not what you think, really. I know it looks bad, but I love him. Nothing has changed,” I lied.

"Do you really think we are that naive, Abigail?” she snapped.

I put my head down into my hands, “No, it's just...Mom, you don't understand,” I pleaded.

"I don't need to understand, Abby. We paid for you to come down here with Makenna, to get experience on your own before school, but not this kind of experience. We didn't sign up for this.” The tears started to fill her eyes. “Now I'm sorry, but I want you to go pack your things. Your summer is over,” she decreed.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Was she serious? How could she do this to me?

"No, I won't go!” I yelled.

She pointed at me angrily. “You have no choice, now move,” she demanded.

I couldn't think. I couldn't breathe.

"I have to work tonight, Mom. I can't just not show up. It wouldn't be fair to Joey or anyone else.” I reminded her of the work ethic they always tried to instill in us.

She looked me up and down, but my father never once stepped back inside.

"Fine. We'll expect to see you after work. Give Joe your notice. You'd better be back here by eleven, young lady.” She hesitated. “Understand? We will be waiting. And you'll be sleeping at our place tonight,” she reminded me.

I nodded meekly in defeat, tears running down my face.

She turned to leave. I could hear the disappointment in her voice as she spoke to my father. Mike looked in at me with sadness in his eyes, and gave me a quick wave.

My life as I knew it was over. How could I leave? What would Colin say or even do? I was afraid to tell him. It was hard enough for both of us knowing we only had two weeks left, let alone one day. I packed anything and everything that I could fit into my one suitcase, contemplating my next move. I was happy when I heard the front door open. I needed to speak to Makenna to ask her what to do. When I ran out of my room, she didn't even seem surprised at the sight of me.

"How are you?” she asked.

I wiped the tears from my face.

"Horrible, my parents...” she stopped me before I could go on.

"I know. Mike called and told me everything."

"What am I going to do?” I asked, hearing the desperation in my own voice.

"Abby, realistically summer's over in a few weeks, and everyone is going home or to school.” She took a long pause. “I know you love him, but what are the chances you'll ever see him again?"

I looked up at her, my voice still shaky.

"He's the one, Makenna. He's the one I'm supposed to be with. I just know it, I feel it,” I stammered.

She played with the bag of cakes on the counter, not sure what to say anymore.

"Well, then. I guess you know your answer,” she said, looking at me nervously.

I grabbed her by the wrists. “Will you cover for me?” I pleaded.

I hated putting her in this predicament, but I felt like I had no choice.

She didn't answer, just looked at me blankly.

I reminded her. “My parents are leaving tomorrow, so if you could just hide out for the next twenty-four hours so they can't find
you
,” I said biting down on my lip, “they won't be able to find
me
."

She rolled her eyes. “Okay, go.” She pushed me toward my room.

It was still early, but I knew Colin would already be at work, setting up for the lunch rush. I didn't want to upset him. I would wait until later to tell him. I quickly called Megan to see if she could cover my shift so my parents couldn't find me. It's not that I wouldn't go home, I just wasn't ready yet. I decided to leave a note for my parents. I was so afraid of what they would think of me, but right now Colin was my priority. I grabbed a pen, trembling the entire time I wrote. I took a piece of scotch tape, wrote their names on the front, and taped it to the front door.

Makenna sat at the kitchen counter watching every step I made. “What's next?” she asked.

I took a deep breath, “Will you drive me to Colin's?"

She nodded. “You bet!” and smiled at me.

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As the car turned the corner, I saw the house Colin had shared all summer with his friends. I knew he wouldn't be there, and hoped the door would be unlocked as it always had been. We sat for a moment in silence, just staring at the house.

"Will you do me another favor?” I asked.

"What?” she asked.

"When you go to work this morning, could you tell Colin I'm here?” I hesitated briefly. “But wait till the end of his shift, I don't want him to worry,” I added.

She looked over at me and nodded.

"Sure, take care and call me asap,” she said, and I hugged her.

"You're the best! I love you,” I told her.

She smiled back.

"You, too. Now go get your summer back,” she teased, pushing me out of the car.

I grabbed my suitcase and handbag from the backseat, and slowly approached the stairs. I could barely grasp what I was doing, not sure if it was the right thing or not. I had one thing on my mind, and one thing only...Colin Murphy.

I turned to her, waved and walked inside. It was quiet, and no one was around. I had hoped they would all be gone, because I didn't want to explain my suitcase to anyone. I wanted to be alone for a while, hide under the blankets and cry. I couldn't believe how drastically my life had changed. It had been less than two months and yet life seemed completely different from the one I'd previously led. My life had shifted—Colin had changed me. I was completely content, happy before Colin Murphy walked into my life, but now I couldn't see my world without him in it.

I went straight to his room and pulled the blinds closed, flopped onto his bed and pulled the blankets loosely over my head. I cried and cried until I had nothing left. My parents were going to be crushed when they discovered the note: their precious, perfect little daughter had run away. I promised them in the note I would be home in a few days, but I wasn't sure if I could deliver on that promise. I would keep one—I would call them in the morning. I wondered if that would be enough to keep them away.

My eyes grew tired, and I felt exhausted from all the tears and drama from the day's events. Somewhere between it all I fell asleep, dreaming. I was alone on the beach; the town was quiet, almost spooky. There was snow on the beach, and I was lost. My bare feet were freezing in the snow. I looked around; no one was there. I could hear my father yelling my name, but I couldn't see him. I was confused. I didn't know how I had gotten there. I looked down to the far end of the beach. Colin stood there with his arms outstretched, waiting for me to join him, calling my name. I could hear him, “Abigail, come to me.” I wanted to answer him, run to him. Nothing came out of my mouth when I tried to speak, and my legs were disappearing in the snow. The dream was so real, he was coming to me. I could feel him now. I felt his warm hands on my face, his warm lips on mine.

"Love, wake up. Abigail, are you okay?” He shook me softly, pulling me out of my dream. I turned around, slow to awake. I rubbed my eyes which were dry from crying all day. Colin gazed down at me with confusion in his eyes.

"Abigail, love what's going on?” he asked. “Why aren't you going to work? Makenna wouldn't say anything. She just told me you were waiting for me."

I felt my body starting to shake again, and I felt completely lost. I sat up, starting to cry, but nothing came out. I had cried all that I could. He just sat there, holding me, rubbing my back, whispering in my ear.

"I love you, we'll figure this out, I promise. No one said this would be easy."

I still hadn't told him what had happened, and he waited patiently for an explanation. I wanted to forget. I wanted him to make me forget my dream, my morning, my parents. I pulled him down, so his body hovered over mine. He slid his hands behind my head, and I lifted my body slightly to meet his. His eyes were cautious as I slowly unbuttoned his shirt. I placed my hand carefully around his neck and pulled his lips down to mine. I used the other free hand to start unbuttoning his pants. The need I had for him was intense this time, and I wouldn't take no for an answer. I felt him surrender slowly, but his kiss was more feverish than ever. He pulled away ever so slightly, and turned away.

"Tell me what's wrong first."

I grabbed his face forcing him to look in my eyes.

"Colin, please... I need you. I want you, now,” I begged.

I didn't have to beg long. He cradled me into his chest, breathing in for a quick moment, then reached down and pulled the dress over my head. His hands were exploring every inch of my body, caressing and kissing every part he touched. I knew in that moment he would never let me go. He had taken me back to a place I never wanted to leave, and I was blissfully happy.

The room darkened as the day moved on, and I lay cradled in his arms.

He finally broke the silence. “Umm, Abigail are you going to tell me what all this is? Why is there a suitcase sitting on the floor? Does is have anything to do with your attacking me earlier, not that I'm complaining, but?” He asked too many questions at once.

I had forgotten about the suitcase and what happened earlier that day to bring me here.

"Don't be mad, okay?” I whispered. “My parents were going to force me to leave with them tomorrow, to go home.” I shook my head. “I couldn't leave. I can't leave you."

He sat up, running his fingers through his hair.

"Okay, so you're telling me what? You took off, and before it happens you wanted to make love to me, that's it?” he asked with more of a skeptical tone than I expected.

I could see that he was upset for me.

"Yes.” The tears found their way back into my eyes, “Don't you want me?” I pleaded under my breath.

He sighed deeply. “Abby, there's nowhere in the world that I would rather be. Christ, you have no idea, but I just don't know if this is the best way. I can't help but feel like this isn't the greatest way to get your family to accept me."

"I'm sorry.” I pulled him back down, nestling my head under his chin. “I just couldn't imagine my life without you. It was the only way."

"I know,” he said.

He sighed again and lay silently next to me for several minutes, deep in thought.

"I have something for you. It's not much...” He got up from the bed, leaving me, and stumbled to the desk across the room. I couldn't take my eyes off his body. I was deep in thought when he walked back toward me. I could see a little black box tightly clasped in the palm of his hand. He knelt down on the floor, resting his arms on the bedside. His one hand pulled me in closer, the other gripped the little box.

"I was saving this for another day, but since you keep attacking me, well, I feel like I need to give this to you now. I don't want your family to think I took your virtue away as well,” he teased, grinning from ear to ear.

I was speechless. I was very about what was in the little black box.

"What's that?” I asked.

"I picked it up the other day in the city, when you went out with Makenna to the movies,” he confessed. “Think of it as a promise ring, of our future together. I want to marry you someday, Abigail Hardy. I love you, more than myself. You haven't just taken my heart, but my soul as well. I want you to wear this, and know that while we're apart, I'll want you and only you.” He whispered the last words in my ear. “I love you. I want you to marry me someday."

He spoke quietly, looking for any kind of reaction from me.

I froze, as I hadn't expected this. My entire childhood flashed before my eyes, my parents, friends, Christmases, school dances. I was eighteen years old and I had found the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He was sitting before me, asking me to marry him. It was the one question every girl dreamed of hearing, but now when it was presented to me, I felt scared. What about college? My future? I took the perfect little box, carefully opening to peek inside. I closed my eyes, reopening them to find the most perfect ring waiting to be placed on my finger. It was a beautiful, heart-shaped, bright green emerald with two hands holding the heart, and a crown on top. When I looked into his eyes, I didn't care anymore. My hand trembled.

"It's a Claddagh. A traditional Irish ring. You see, the heart represents my love for you, the hands our friendship, and the crown, my loyalty to you.” After a brief pause. “May I?” He pulled it delicately from the box.

I couldn't speak. I nodded in acceptance.

I held out my hand, and then pulled it away.

"Colin, you don't have to do this—I mean just because of everything.” I was confused. Was he asking me because he felt guilty? Did he feel guilty for leaving soon, guilt for being my first? Or maybe, just maybe, he loved me as much as I loved him.

He started laughing. “Abby, do you really think I asked you just because we made love a few times?” he asked.

"I'm not sure,” I said.

"Abigail,” he chuckled. “I knew that I was going to ask you to marry me from the moment you first spoke to me. I knew you were the only person in the world that I could see myself with.” He kissed me softly and quickly. “I called my ma weeks ago...she can't wait to meet the girl who's whisking her son away.” There was silence for a brief moment.

"So do I need to ask you again?” he mused.

"You told your mom about me?"

"Of course, they all know about you,” he said.

I held out my hand again, and he placed the ring on my finger and pulled me down on top of him. All my thoughts quickly fled from my head, and I let myself drown in my summer once more.

It was late when we were able to pull ourselves away from each other, each one not wanting to let go. I couldn't help but think that my parents would be expecting me very soon. How in the world would I tell them I was engaged to be married? I didn't even really know what that meant, except that my summer had suddenly become the rest of my life. I was lightheaded and dizzy just thinking about the conversation that was going to happen. I realized that I hadn't eaten since this morning. My stomach was now making sure any one around knew as well. Colin kissed the top of my head.