Down the Shore (20 page)

"How come your family left England?"

"My da got a job offer he couldn't refuse, and let's face it, his heart was always back in Ireland. We would have gone back eventually."

"Do you think your parents will like me?” I wondered out loud.

"Are you kidding, lass, they will love you. Will you come over if I send for you, over the holidays perhaps?” His voice held genuine happiness.

"I would love to, but I can't come over for Christmas. My family would never let me.” I paused briefly. “How ‘bout spring break?” I asked, excited by the idea.

He frowned. “You want to wait until spring to see each other again? Are you serious?” he asked, disappointed.

"We'll think of something,” I assured him.

As I glanced down at my watch, I knew I had to go home. My family would be looking for me.

"Colin, I need to head back. Can we talk later tonight?” I stood and he rose, too.

"Sure thing, but we're not finished with this, love,” he reminded me. I gave him a quick squeeze, and a long tender kiss to hold him over for the day. I sprinted all the way home.

My mother would be going crazy looking for me.

It had been after ten and we always went to the beach together for the day. I quickly threw my hair up, and put on my most modest bikini. My phone was on the floor exactly where I had flung it the night before.

I flipped it open. I had five missed calls from my family. They started as early as eight in the morning. I listened to every one, asking my whereabouts each time. The last one telling me exactly where to meet them, the same spot as usual and that they would be waiting.

It was hard to find them at first, as the summer was in full swing and the beaches were packed. I glanced over the myriad of umbrellas, sun-worshippers, and footballs being hurled through the air. It wasn't long before I spotted my father and brother riding a wave on their old beat up boogie boards. I watched them carefully to see where they walked, trying to decipher where they would sit. They sat right smack in the middle of everyone. Something in that moment gave me relief; there were too many witnesses, my parents would never embarrass me in public.

I was hesitant to approach, but I knew it was inevitable. I walked over casually, convincing myself it would all be fine. My mother looked at me coolly through her sunglasses. “Good morning, Abigail."

I placed my towel as close to her as possible. I wanted a chance to explain myself without being in earshot of my father. “Morning."

She had her head tilted back and her feet wedged into the sand. She sat in her favorite pink beach chair.

She stiffened in her chair and asked, “Why didn't you answer your phone all morning?"

I knew I couldn't tell her the whole truth, that I had a man who insisted on not letting me out of his sight, especially at night because of my encounter with Nick.

"My phone died. I forgot to charge it, that's all,” I quickly responded.

"Really? That's not like you,” she challenged me.

I shook my head. “Sorry.” I started rubbing the sun block into my legs, carefully studying my mother's reaction.

"I spoke with Makenna this morning.” She hesitated. “She didn't seem to know where you were. Care to explain?” She was clearly irritated with me this time.

She pushed her sunglasses on top of her head and locked her eyes with mine, waiting for an answer.

I was slow to respond. “I just went for a walk on the beach, to sort things out is all. Really,” I lied.

Who was I? I had never lied to my parents, so why was this so easy, yet so difficult? I hated to do it, but I was afraid of the consequences if I told her the truth.

She lowered her glasses back over her eyes.

"Abby, I'm sure he's a lovely boy, but realistically you only have a few weeks left, and then what?” she wondered.

My emotions started getting the better of me.

"Mom, do you remember how you told me that I would know true love when I found it?” I asked.

She nodded softly, probably regretting that conversation. “Abby, you can't be serious, what could you possibly have in common with him?"

I grabbed the shovel stuck in the sand next to my mom and began fidgeting and scooping up the sand.

"He means everything to me, Mom. I love him. Even if that means following him back to Ireland, I will,” I whispered, not sure how she was going to react to my threat.

She snapped. “I can assure you that will never happen, young lady."

I stood up and faced her. “I'm going for a swim, this conversation is over.” I stumbled off. My brother came splashing in after me, pushing me under every chance he got.

"How mad are they?” I asked anxiously.

"Enough! They were thinking of taking you back home this week with us.” He acknowledged my worst nightmare. We just stood there side by side, jumping each wave that came at us.

"Well, they can't make me. I'm an adult. I can do whatever I want,” I countered, trying to fight back the tears welling up in my eyes.

He looked back over his shoulder, then said, “Look, Dad wanted to grab you last night, but Mom changed his mind somehow.” He added, “Be on your best behavior, pretend it's just a summer crush or something."

I jumped on his back trying to push him under but I underestimated his strength. “Thanks, you're an awesome brother."

I decided he was right. I'd play it down. My family only had a few days left and I would spend as much time as possible with them. The only problem would be not spending time with Colin. I would sleep at my parents’ rental at least one night to ease their minds, I decided. We slowly walked back out to our towels, our parents aware of our presence as they watched us approach.

"Mom, I was thinking. I have off tonight. Maybe we could all head into Stone Harbor for dinner and ice cream? Maybe I could sleep at your place tonight, make it an all nighter... pinochle perhaps?” I shrugged.

My parents exchanged a quick glance.

"That would be great, it's a plan,” Mom said happily.

"Great! I'm gonna head back and get ready. I'll meet you all at your place, around five?"

It was only about two at this point, but I needed to see Colin to explain why he wouldn't have me next to him tonight. I was sure he would be disappointed, but I knew he would understand. I left knowing my parents were thrilled with my suggestion.

The sun was hot and I was tired from the night before. I walked the twenty minutes to his house, and found the door open. A few people I didn't recognize were lounging around. I went straight up to his room, hoping he would be there. I wanted to fall into his arms, into his bed, to feel him. It was empty. I trotted quickly down to his beach block entrance, and discovered him sitting among his friends, perched up on his elbows, with a cigarette dangling from his lips. I crept up behind him, thinking of surprising him. I was taken back by how amazing he looked, and lost my will. I leaned down and touched his bare shoulder.

"Hey, you."

He twisted his body around to meet mine, quickly burying his cigarette in the sand.

"Sorry, love, I wasn't expecting to see you.” He reached up pulling me on top of him. “What a lovely surprise,” he said.

I bit down on my lip softly.

"What?” he asked, knowing I had something to say.

I huffed. “You may not think so in a minute."

He sighed. “Let me guess, your family?” he asked.

I pouted. “How did you know?"

"No worries, I'll just pick you up later,” he said, kissing the tip of my nose.

"Umm,” I hesitated. “I'm actually sleeping at my folks’ place tonight. I'm sorry.” I put my head in my hands. “It's the only way, but just tonight. I promise,” I reassured him.

He chuckled. “It's all right, I'll miss the hell out of you, but it's fine. I'll head to the pub with me lads."

He held me in his arms, and I felt so amazing once they were wrapped around me. We swam for a little while before we lay together in silence, knowing it was the last we would see each other today. I looked up sadly after two hours of his soft arms around me.

"I gotta go. I'll see you tomorrow at work, okay?” I kissed him one last time.

"I'll be waiting. Oh, and make sure you bring your cell, and call me before you turn in.” He pulled me in toward him one more time and kissed me lightly whispering, “I love you."

I buried my nose in his neck to breathe him in. I could only smell the coconut oil that was rubbed into his shoulders.

"I love you, too,” I said quietly so no one could hear.

I hated leaving him; I hated not spending every minute with him. My heart ached as I walked away. I couldn't think about that, not now. I had to save face; I had to put on a good show for my folks. I couldn't let them take me home, and I knew I wouldn't go. It was hard enough knowing that I only had a few more weeks left with Colin, and they weren't going to shorten it.

The night went exactly as planned, and I was happy that Colin was spending time with his friends. My family and I had so much fun. We went to Marabella's in Stone Harbor for dinner, caught a movie and played cards until midnight. I was given the choice to bunk with my little brother or to sleep on the couch. I chose the latter of the two. I waited patiently for some time to pass before I called Colin. I couldn't wait to hear the sound of his voice. I missed him. I opened the patio door carefully, stepped out onto the deck and pressed in his number.

He answered on the first ring.

"Ah, there you are. I was beginning to wonder if they kidnapped you,” he joked.

I could hear the music playing in the background.

"I'm fine, how's your night going?” I asked.

"Grand, we're at the pub. There's a great band playing.” He stopped for a moment. “I wish you were here, though,” he added.

I laughed softly, knowing he missed me as much as I missed him.

"I'll see you tomorrow night, and I'm sure you'll survive,” I teased.

"Sure, tomorrow,” he agreed.

I could almost feel his lips kissing mine through the phone.

"Good night,” I sighed before I pressed the off button.

I slowly crept my way back in and back onto the couch. My eyes heavy, I closed them and drifted off to the happiest place in the world, Colin's arms. I wanted the dream to last forever, and I didn't care how long I slept. We were together, talking about our future, our lives together, and I was happy.

I was awakened by the smell and sound of coffee brewing in the kitchen. I took a deep breath before opening my eyes.

"Morning, Mom,” I said cheerfully.

She was pouring herself some coffee.

"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you, but I needed a cup,” she apologized, holding her mug up in the air. “Daddy and I were thinking of driving down to Cape May today. Are you in?” she asked me, looking hopeful.

I didn't want to go. I wanted to run straight into Colin's arms.

"Gosh, y'know I have to work a double shift today. I'm covering lunch for a friend. I can't,” I lied. It was getting easier as each lie crossed my lips.

She studied my face, looking for any kind of reason not to believe me.

I quickly added, “It's just that I already took so much time off to spend with you guys."

"Okay, Abby, but we'll miss you,” she said.

I couldn't look at her, so I focused on the terra cotta tiles that covered the floor.

"Sorry, but how about going to breakfast at Uncle Bill's?” I suggested, knowing she couldn't resist.

She nodded happily.

"Go wake up your brother, would you?” she asked.

I had told Colin I would see him at work, but I couldn't wait another minute. We finished up our breakfast and my family dropped me off at my comfy little summer house. I quickly showered, threw on Colin's favorite sundress and ran out the door. I had hoped he was still sleeping; I didn't feel like going to the beach today. It was still relatively early and knowing Colin's friends, they had probably been out late last night. I had to laugh as I approached the house. The front door was wide open for all the world to see in. I walked quietly up the stairs, peeking into each room. All was quiet. Everyone was asleep or already gone.

He was lying there, the blankets pushed to the bottom of the bed. I stood in the doorway for several minutes. I could stare at him all day and be completely content. He lay sprawled on his back. His body looked tan against the white sheets, his cross hung delicately around his neck nestled into the hair on his chest. I could see his boxers peeking through the sheets. I kicked my shoes off and climbed in beside him. He reeked of cigarettes and beer, but I didn't care, not today. I just wanted to hold him. It was so natural the way he pulled me in when he felt me climb in beside him. His eyes were closed, his nose breathing in heavily at my neck.

"Mmm, am I dreamin?” he asked.

I giggled. “No, I'm here.” I wrapped my arms around his waist.

"Good, I can finally get some sleep,” he whispered.

"What are you talking about? You were just asleep,” I reminded him.

"Not really. I stared at the clock all bloody night. I couldn't sleep without you next to me."

He pulled me in closer and quickly drifted back to sleep. I let him rest for a little longer, just daydreaming about what our life would be like. It saddened me knowing we had only a few precious weeks left. I knew right then and there that before he went back home, I wanted to be with him. I wanted to give myself to him and only him. I only had one problem: I hadn't the slightest idea of what or how to do it. He was always so patient with me, and insisted on waiting until I was really ready.

It grew late, and I squirmed out of his arms; he was sound asleep. I grabbed a glass of water and sat alone on the porch with my thoughts. What would happen when our time ran out? It was something we really didn't talk about. He always had the same answer—no worries. School seemed unimportant to me, life seemed unimportant if he weren't a part of it. I knew he loved me, and how I felt, but was that enough? I remembered all the things we wanted, but would absence make all that change?

I was lost in thought, staring out into the street, tears dripping into my mouth. I hadn't even realized he was standing there.