Downsizing (2 page)

“
Here.” He delved into his pocket
and produced a handkerchief. “I think it’s clean.”

“
Thanks.” Sniffing, Maxine dabbed
at her eyes.

“
What’s wrong, Max? Wanna talk
about it?”

“
Nothing, other than the fact that
I’m fat and ugly.”

“
You ain’t ugly.” Before she could
stop him Noah reached up and removed her glasses. “You’ve got
gorgeous emerald eyes. Do you have to wear glasses? Can’t you get
contact lenses?”

“
No. I’ve got an
astigmatism.”

“
Never mind, you’re still gorgeous
to me. You place too much stock by appearances.”

“
That’s easy for you to say!”
Maxine rounded on him. “You’ve got every female under the age of
sixty in Colebrook lusting after you. And why do you suppose that
is?”

“
Yeah, and that’s why I’m
qualified to say that you shouldn’t judge by appearances. You’ve
got plenty going for you and don’t have to prove
yourself.”

“
Nobody can see beyond this.” She
indicated her body with her hands, looking close to tears
again.

“
Well, I can. We’ve both had to
survive on our wits, you and me. You’ve done it through your
intelligence, but I just went to the local trade school…well, when
there was nothing more profitable to do with my time,” he added
with a grin. “So I’ve had to learn to run with what I’ve
got.”

“
Noah, I don’t think—”

“
If it weren’t for you I’d never
have discovered the joys of reading.”

“
Yes you would. You were obviously
drawn toward books or you’d never have come into the library that
day.”

He recalled the day in question, a little over
a year ago, when he’d strolled into the library on a whim, wearing
mud-splattered work clothes that elicited disapproving tuts from
its staid occupants. Maxine, having just started her holiday job
there, sat behind the counter completely engrossed in a book. He’d
asked her what she was reading, but she was too tongue-tied to
answer him straight away. Noah couldn’t understand why.
He
was the one out of place, and if anyone felt awkward it ought to
have been him.

He’d known who Maxine was, but reckoned she
was out of his league intellectually and would never want to know
him. To his astonishment, she found her voice and recommended books
that he might enjoy. Her recommendations were spot on, and he went
back the following week to thank her, and to talk about what he’d
read. It became a habit, and he often waited until last thing so
they could have coffee together when she got off work.

“
Perhaps,” he said. “But I was too
busy making money and had no time to waste reading. Until you
opened my eyes and I realized what I was missing.”

Maxine, who he knew always found it difficult
to deal with compliments, changed the subject. “How’s your father?”
she asked.

“
Same as ever.” He drifted into a
moody silence.

“
Sorry if I’ve said something I
shouldn’t have.”

“
You haven’t, but as usual you’ve
turned the subject away from yourself.”

“
No one’s interested in
me.”

“
I am.”

Noah cupped her face in his hand, and his
thumb gently traced the outline of her plump jaw. He dropped his
head and brushed his lips against hers, parodying the seductive
dance they’d just shared in the tent. Maxine gasped, but when her
arms slid round his neck and her eyes fluttered closed, it became
clear that she wasn’t objecting. That impression was confirmed
when, with a deep sigh, she buried her fingers in his hair. Noah’s
lips instinctively hardened against hers, forcing them apart as his
tongue slid into her mouth.

“
Why did you do that?” she asked
breathlessly when he broke the kiss.

“
You looked like you needed
reassurance.”

“
Don’t!” She jerked away from him
and groped for her glasses. “Just don’t! You don’t need to stoke
your already over-inflated ego by playing games with me.” She
glared at him. “Just leave me alone.” She folded her arms beneath
her ample breasts and stared off into the distance.

“
I’m not playing with you. I’d
never do that.” He ran his hand through his disheveled hair and
sighed. “Oh sure, the women come on to me, and I have them.” He
shrugged. “I’m only human. But it’s just fucking; it don’t mean
nothing. You’re different, though. I respect your ambition. I can
really talk to you about anything, and I don’t want to lose you
when you go on to greater things.” He fixed her with an intense
gaze. “Can we still be friends, no matter what?”

“
All right,” Maxine said slowly.
“If that’s what you’d like.”

When she glanced dubiously at her body he knew
precisely what she was thinking.

“
Your size don’t matter to me, and
if other people can’t see beyond it, then it’s their loss.” He
smiled at her. “But you need to sort your life, and could start by
losing that kid in the hall.”

Maxine blinked at him. “Cassie, you
mean?”

“
Yeah, her. She takes advantage of
you.”

“
I know that, but it’s a two-way
street, and I needed her in my corner if I was to survive at
school. If she hadn’t taken me under her wing, God alone knows how
I’d have coped.”

“
Max, you got into that posh
school on a scholarship, which means you belonged there. She only
got in because her old man paid the fees. And, I’m guessing here,
but I reckon Cassie befriended you because she needed your help
with her homework.”

Maxine nodded. “I know that too.” She
shrugged. “But it was a situation that suited us both.”

“
So, what does she want from you
now? Why is she still hanging out with you?”

Maxine placed her hands on her hips and glared
at him. “Has it occurred to you that Cassie, and Rachel for that
matter, might actually enjoy my company?”

“
Hey, don’t get mad at me.” He was
amused by her fit of pique. “I’m sure Joey’s Rachel likes you for
yourself, but Cassie Fenwick only ever thinks of number
one.”

“
Possibly, but I don’t mind.
Anyway, what makes you say that?”

“
I notice things. Besides, Rachel
talks to Joey.”

“
I like Rachel a lot.”

Noah grinned. “So does Joey.”

“
Cassie wants to get to know you.”
Maxine’s words came out in a jumbled rush.

“
Ah.” Noah scowled. “That would
explain it.”

“
What, you think that she still
hangs out with me because I’m your friend?”

“
I don’t mean to sound vain here,
but she’s tried just about everything else.”

“
Modesty doesn’t suit you, Noah,”
Maxine said, smiling. “So stop playing coy and tell me why you
don’t like Cassie.”

“
I don’t like her type. She’s
spoiled, manipulative, and stuck up.”

“
Well, her parents are quite well
to-do, so I suppose that’s not so surprising.”

“
Her mother’s a bitch.” Noah
thumped his clenched fist against his thigh. “She tried real hard
to get me taken into foster care when I was little. Pretended she
knew what was best for me, and made my life a misery with her
interfering ways.”

“
Why did she think she could do
that?”

“
Well, you know Dad. His crazy
schemes are always on the dodgy side of legal.” He scowled. “He’s
the only parent I had, though—the only security I’d ever known—and
she wanted to take me away from him.” His scowl intensified. “If I
ever have kids, I’ll never put them through anything like
that.”

“
She can be a little forceful, I
suppose,” Maxine conceded.

“
I heard snatches of her
conversations with Social Services, and I used to lie awake at
night afterward, confused. I wondered what I’d done wrong, and was
petrified she’d get me taken away from Dad. I’ll never forgive her
for sticking her nose in.”

“
Yes well, that’s the way she is,
but Mr. Fenwick’s nice.”

“
The Harley Street Cardiologist,”
Noah said sarcastically. “I’ve never had the pleasure.”

“
Well then, reserve judgment until
you meet him.”

“
I don’t suppose our paths will
ever cross.” He stood up and offered her his hand, pulling her
easily to her feet. “Are you up to going back in?”

“
Sure.”

“
I’ll be making a move in a
minute. I have to see a man about a dog. But I’ll give you a ring
later in the week and we’ll do something, if you like.”

Maxine grinned and told him that she would
very much like.

Chapter Two

The first half of Maxine’s second A-Level year
passed in a satisfying blur of intense study. Her job at the
library had fallen victim to the council’s spending cuts, and the
only paid occupation she now had, at the local bakery, fed the
hunger she ineffectually fought to suppress. As a result her
waistline was larger than ever.

But if Noah noticed, it didn’t appear to
bother him. Their friendship endured, and they fell into the habit
of meeting once a week. They walked by the river, eating fish and
chips out of the paper, or occasionally splashed out for cinema
tickets if there was a film they both wanted to see. Noah still
enjoyed literature, and Maxine scoured the library for books that
would interest them both. They read anything from Hemingway to
Jackie Collins: they believed in being open minded.

Maxine confided in Noah unreservedly. In
return she listened as, eyes glistening with determination, he
mapped out his ambitious plans for the future, intimating that they
involved her. She never quite understood in what capacity, though,
and was afraid to seek clarification in case she’d got it all
wrong. She was flattered that he continued to enjoy her company,
aware that the rest of his limited leisure time was spent with the
various women who continued to pursue him.

Maxine teased him about them, predicting that
it would end in tears, but he shrugged off her concerns, telling
her he wasn’t as daft as he looked. He would never bring a child
into this world until he was ready to settle down. He knew how it
felt to be referred to as an inconvenient accident, and would never
inflict that sort of guilt on his own offspring.

After the spiteful tirade she’d had to endure
from Cassie when Noah ignored her at Joey’s party, Maxine hoped the
friendship had run its course. She certainly didn’t seek Cassie
out, but for some reason Cassie continued to cling. Maxine was even
invited to join Cassie’s family on holiday in the South of
France.

Maxine invented reasons not to go, but her
mother bullied her into accepting, reminding her just how useful it
would be since French was one of her A-level subjects.

Trust her mother to think only of the academic
benefits. She didn’t appear to notice her daughter’s anguish at the
prospect of the trip, which proved to be the most mortifying
experience of her entire life.

When she told Noah about the invitation, he
was definite that she shouldn’t go.

“
Why not?”

“
Because, like always, she’s using
you, Max.”

Maxine furled her brow. “I don’t see how. What
could she possibly want from me now that we’ve left
school?”

His eyes softened as he leveled his gaze on
her face. “Max, things never change. You can bet that if Cassie
wants you to go, then she has an ulterior motive.”

“
Perhaps, and you know I don’t
want to go.” She shuddered. “The South of France is just bound to
be full of slim, beautiful people.”

He trailed his fingers lazily down the length
of her arm. “Which will make you miserable the whole time you’re
there.”

“
Yes, I expect I will, but I can’t
get out of it.”

“
Say you’ve already got holiday
plans.”

“
But I haven’t. How can I
lie?”

“
It ain’t no lie. I’ve been
thinking, Max, it’s high time I had a break. There’s a weekend
literary festival in Winchester bang smack in the middle of the
time you’re supposed to be away. Why don’t we go to it
together?”

Maxine stared at him in stupefaction. “But you
never take holidays.”

He shrugged. “Like I just said, it’s about
time I did.”

Any doubts about the advisability of her love
for this sensitive, intuitive man evaporated at that moment. He’d
give up several days when he could be earning more precious money
just to take her to a Literary Festival because it was the sort of
thing that she—that they’d both—enjoy. Because he knew it was a
place where she’d be judged by the size of her mind alone. Her lips
curved upward in a spontaneous smile.

“
You’d do that for me?”

“
I’d do it for
us
. Come on,
Max,” he chided, upbeat and positive. “What do you say?”

It was no contest. She would a thousand times
rather spend two days with Noah than two weeks in the South of
France. But in the end Maxine couldn’t hold out against her mother
who insisted that she accept Cassie’s invitation.