Draculas (57 page)

Paul

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Nice! I love it...just a thought, What if both Stacie and Adam die, but a young man offers to save their baby at the end, and they let him. We of course, are interested and instantly sympathetic with this guy, and only in the last sentence/paragraph of the book, do we realize the young man is Mort, walking out of the hospital with a baby in his arms, a protege who will help him conquer the world.

Blake

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If you need to kill Clay, I understand. But he's probably the most fun character in the book. I wouldn't be adverse to having him live. Or maybe doing the classic: He's probably dead, Shanna cries, then she sees him tangled up in the fire escape when he jumped off the roof.

Jeff and I have already discussed Jenny and Randall dying. Stacie should survive, with her baby, but Blake and I discussed killing Adam.

I love the idea of the kid becoming a dracula on Randall's back.

Joe

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I'm not adverse to Clay living, but I had such a neat death idea: He's got 2 high explosive 40mm grenades. They're designed not to explode within 90 feet of the launcher. He can modify that. I see him wounded, bleeding, luring a whole bunch of draculas into some sort of enclosed area and detonating both, turning himself and them into meat confetti.

Paul

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First of all, "Meat Confetti" needs to be the name of a thrash metal band.

If Adam is mortally wounded, Clay could teach Adam how to set them off. Being a man of God, Adam would rather die than become an unholy abomination like Randall had become. And let's say his wife also died. So Clay could give him a lesson, then do a dramatic escape with the baby.

Then when Clay makes it to safety, he (inadvertently) hands the baby off to Mortimer, who is now a young man (and flirting with Shanna, as he'd wanted to in the beginning.)

Joe

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I LIKE IT!

Paul

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For Jeff: I put up a first draft of the Clay and Randall scene. Hit that sucker and do what you want with Randall's dialogue or whatever.

Oddly, I couldn't get them to fight. Maybe you can. They just trashed talked for me. Might've got to fighting if the
Aliens
references hadn't come up. (I found a couple of colorful ones.)

Paul

* * *

I won't be able to read it until this evening, but Randall is in such lousy physical shape by that point that it would completely make sense that he'd resort to trash talk over violence when dealing with Clay. Especially since Clay has guns.

Jeff

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Loved the Clay and Randall scene, Paul.

Jeff, to get Randall to that point, he's gotta ditch the wheelchair dracula, and get the circuit breaker back up.

Joe

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Did I miss the "Jenny on the intercom" scene? I'm going to use that during the Randall vs. Wheelchair Dracula scene.

Jeff

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I'm doing the "Jenny uses the intercom scene" right now. Her message is:

"Randall, I'm still in pediatrics with the children. I need you to...oh my God!"

This will be while the lights are still out.

Joe

September 10, 2010

Since Jenny is using the Intercom with the electricity still off, I see no reason for Randall to put the lights back on. We can finish the novel in the dark. Scarier, more suspenseful.

Get your flashlights, lighters, and torches...

Joe

* * *

I've added Clay and Randall 3.3 to Paul's folder.

Jeff

* * *

A new file up -- Just shy of 3k in length. Clay gets Shanna to safety, meets a TV crew there, offs the dead staties as they become draculas, gives Shanna the ring, hauls out his MM-1, and heads back inside.

Paul

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Sorry, that was just shy of 2.3k

Paul

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Fuckin' A Paul Wilson. Awesome scene.

I've got a Jenny/Lanz back and forth going on that will probably be the grossest scene in the book, then she'll be all ready to be rescued. She also has four kids with her, who should also be rescued.

Clay's gonna have his hands full.

Joe

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Jeff 5.0...is done.

I'm going to do another short Randall chapter where he's stumbling through the hospital, really out of it (which lets us "cheat" the timeframe a bit because it's not specific about how long he's wandering around) and then I'll link it up to the Randall Meets Clay scene.

Jeff

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All - can't wait to read the new pages...I've been quiet this week b/c I've been trying to wrap up edits on AMERICAN GENOCIDE but I should be back into DRACULAS Saturday or Sunday.

Blake

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Awesome scene, Jeff.

I'm guessing Randall will get stuck at the stairs because of his injury, and have to crawl, and the legless dracula will be right behind him in a death race. Won't be so funny anymore when the dracula is closing the gap.

You also need to do a Benny scene where he finds gas. I did some research, and a two cycle engine like a chainsaw should be able to run on isopropyl alcohol. In other words, rubbing alcohol, which is everywhere.

Benny would know this because his chainsaw juggling buddy used to also spit fire, and used rubbing alcohol to both blow flames and power his saws.

Blake - No worries about being behind. Take as long as you need with American Genocide. Because we've replaced you with Brian Keene.

Joe

* * *

Joe, you're a treasure.

Blake

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So let's bury him!

Jeff

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Free sample is live...

http://www.amazon.com/DRACULAS-Chapters-Upcoming-Release-ebook/dp/B0042ANZBU

Joe

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Sweet!

When I tried to download the sampler, my Kindle went dead. 100% blank screen, flipping the power switch did nothing--dead.

Fortunately, a manual reset worked, but clearly DRACULAS is a book of evil.

Jeff

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Honestly, no shit, it crashed my Kindle PC too. WTF?

Blake

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http://www.amazon.com/DRACULAS-Novel-Terror-ebook/dp/B0042AMD2M

Go ahead and tell the world. We're going into full-on promo mode.

Joe

September 11, 2010

My Jenny/Lanz scene is almost finished, then I'll be caught up to Paul. Jeff has one more scene to get him up to the point where he can meet with Clay.

Blake--you've got some catching up to do. If you haven't started it yet, let me do the Wolkenstein explanation, and you concentrate on Stacie and Adam and Oasis.

Or if you're really gung-ho about Wolkenstein, go for it. We can work around you until you're ready.

I'm thinking this whole thing will max out around 70k words. Then we'll each have a shot at editing it.

My wife has read what we have so far, and she couldn't tell who wrote what section. Which is pretty impressive, since she's read all of us. This reads seamlessly.

She loved it, BTW. But the one thing she says is lacking is suspense. She thinks it's a lot of fun, but could be scarier.

We're all in a dark hospital right now, so we might want to use this setting to stretch out the tension a bit. I also anticipate going back into the manuscript and adding a bit more atmosphere and creepiness.

That said, this is obviously a lot more like ALIENS than ALIEN, and I'm fine with that. I think readers will dig it.

Joe

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I've lost track of time. What time of day is it?

Paul

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In the book, or in your personal life?

In the book, I believe it's around 9pm.

In your life, it's 11:18, right about time for your first nap of the day. Your name is Dr. Wilson, and you also write books.

Joe

* * *

I made way more progress last night than I thought I would, and will be finished with my edits by tonight, which means I'm back on Draculas tomorrow and should catch up pretty quickly. I'm happy to do the Shanna scene, and I'll do it first, but if it's slowing anything down, feel free.

Blake

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I left the end of Clay 3.0 open for that. It can then be connected to Clay & Randall.

Paul

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A non-gory scene with our lovable clown.

Jeff

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Nice, Jeff. Though, in total candor, I'm not sure if we want to step away from the story for a full-fledged flashback. What do you guys think?

I just wrote a scene with Lanz that actually made me a bit nauseous. I tried to keep it clinical, because he is a doctor, but it ranks up there with the grossest things I've ever written...

Joe

* * *

I thought about that, but I think we have to embrace the sheer absurdity of the "clown gasses up chainsaw with rubbing alcohol" concept. It's a quick enough scene that it doesn't really disrupt the pacing, and it provides a "quiet" moment in a book that has few, and Benny-in-flashback gets to speak for the reader who is saying "C'mon, gimme a break!"

Jeff

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I revised this to a night scene.

If Maria wants suspense, I'll try to give her some. I'm sending Clay back up to the 4th floor (that's where Randall and pediatrics are, right?) Any problem if the emergency lights in this hall are knocked out so it's DARK -- I mean, pitch black?

Paul

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I might be wrong--I think pediatrics is on the third floor. I went off the idea that Clay found Benny on the third floor. So now Randall is going up to the fourth floor to find a different route back to pediatrics, where he'll meet Clay and link to your chapter, and then he'll continue back down to the third floor to reunite with Jenny.

Jeff

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@ Jeff - I like the Benny flashback, and see your point. We'll pop it into the manuscript and see how it reads when everything is put together. A brief respite is fine. But if it throws off the pace, it may have to be done as interior monologue. What do you other guys think?

@ Paul - Pitch black is cool. The draculas could have knocked out lights. Clay would have a Maglite, no doubt. He'd probably have those spot lights that mount on gun barrels. Laser sights too. Though Clay might think laser sights are cheating...

Joe

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Okay, I'll have Clay go to the 4th floor, do some suspense in the dark, then realize peds is on the 3rd and go down.

Where's Obstetrics? Eventually Clay has to meet up with the minister so he can show him how to off himself and take a load of draculas with him.

Paul

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Okay, this one's done, and links directly to Paul's chapter where Randall and Clay meet.

Jeff

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Great chapter, Jeff. Love the political correctness Randall grapples with.

Here's what I'm thinking as historical context:

Oswald von Wolkenstein was a member of the Order of the Dragon in the early 1400s. The Order was supposedly formed to fight the Turks and the Ottoman Empire.

But what if it was formed to fight draculas? Members of the order were called Draconists.

The black death raged throughout the 1400s, Today, historians and scholars believe it was the bubonic and pneumonic plague that caused it, but there has been no absolute evidence to support this hypothesis, only educated guesses.

So what if the black death caused dracula-like symptoms in some of its hosts?

Black death ravages the world, but when people with certain genetic precursors are exposed to it (like certain royal bloodlines) it mutates its victims into draculas. The Draconists had family members affected in this way, including Oswald.

The Draconists, out of self-preservation, manage to kill all of the mutations and keep it under wraps, even though it became the source for vampire and werewolf legends. But Oswald, rather than kill his diseased son, kept him chained up in the cellar.

The son escapes, goes on a killing spree, ending up in Transylvania and causing a dracula epidemic.

Vlad III of Wallachia (Vlad the Imapaler), to save his country in the 1450s, realizes the easiest, fastest, and safest hands-off way to kill draculas is to impale them on large stakes, where they'll eventually starve to death, unable to climb off.

Oswald's son is caught by Vlad, who beheaded him. It was Oswald's son's head found in the field by the farmer in present day.

Mortimer is a direct line from Wolkenstein. He's got the bloodline, and the genetic precursor. At the beginning, we can put a draconis ouroborus on his robe as a lapel insignia.

This ties in Stoker's Dracula, Vlad the Impaler, the Draconist order, the black death, and the source of monster legends, and wraps it all up in a neat little historically possible package.

Joe

* * *

BTW- the Draconis ouroboros symbol is a dragon creature eating its own tail. Much like our draculas eat themselves.

Joe

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Verrrrrrrrry cool.

Where does it work into the story? Are we going to weave in bits and pieces throughout?

Jeff

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Blake is putting it in, when Shanna is explaining to Clay what possibly caused this.

Joe

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To make the timeframe work, I think Clay needs to reunite with Randall =after= Randall has saved Jenny. Randall has had enough solo adventures, so I'm going to take him straight to pediatrics, and his final battle with Benny should be when Jenny (and the kids!) are there. She has a grudge against the clown, too, so they can fight him together. They kill Benny, but right before that, Randall gets bitten, so Clay reaches pediatrics just as they're dealing with that unfortunate fact.