Dreams of a Virgin
Read Dreams of a Virgin Online
Authors: John Foltin
Dreams of a Virgin
Published by John Foltin at Smashwords
Copyright 2011 John Foltin
Cover Art by Donna Casey
Smashwords Edition, License Notes
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CONTENTS
This is the story of Jeff, a forty-year-old
virgin. He has had trouble talking to women all his life. He has
only had a handful of dates in his life.
He was bullied back in high school and junior
high. Girls would feign interest in him to see his reaction. Guys
would question his sexuality.
He is not an unattractive man, but he
believes he is. Because women don’t give him the time of day, he
feels that there is something wrong with him to drive them off.
He is a great guy. One of the nicest men you
will ever meet. An old-fashioned guy with old-fashioned beliefs.
Hard working. Talented.
His first date wasn’t until he was
twenty-six. He has never had a relationship last longer than a
month. He hasn’t had a date in more than six years. While most from
his high school class are married or were married, he has never
come close.
His biggest wish in life is to become a
father. He would love to have a child of his own, to pass down his
knowledge and values to. At forty, however, he sees that dream
slipping further and further away.
He’s fallen on some hard times. He’s never
been able to enjoy the finer things in life. He’s always had to get
by on the bare necessities.
He gets depressed easily, mostly because of
how lonely he gets. When he gets depressed, he dreams. He dreams on
how his life could be better. He dreams of what will happen when
that first time does happen.
Dreams. The world of the subconscious. We
can’t control our actions in that world, but they can control us if
we let them. We can be anything we want to be, do anything we want
to do.
This is a collection of some of the dreams
that Jeff has had. Forty dreams in all, one for every year he has
lived. Some are innocent; others are extreme. Some are naughty;
others are sweet.
A word of warning: Some of these dreams
contain violence against women. I do not condone the actions. I
apologize in advance if anyone is offended by any of these stories;
it was not my intention to offend. Just remember... These are only
dreams. Nothing else.
With that, let’s take a look inside the mind
of this forty-year-old virgin.
TOWARDS A DREAM
Have you ever wanted to ask someone at work out but
were too afraid of what would happen if she said no? Well, what
would you do if she asked you?
For months, I have had my eyes on Kimberly. I
can describe her without giving her a second look. Long brown hair.
Brown eyes. Petite. Very nicely dressed. Very friendly.
About six months ago, she started working
here. Although she worked in a different department, I saw her
every day. I fell in love the first time my eyes gazed on her. I
couldn’t wait until eleven o’clock to go to lunch just to pass by
her again.
That was just it. I would pass by her.
Nothing else. I had to get up the courage to say ‘Hi’ to her. For
weeks, I tried. When I opened my mouth, only air came out. I
thought, “What’s wrong with you? Two little letters. H. I. Hi.
That’s it. Why can’t you say that to her?” Finally one day, she
caught my stare. She reacted.
“Hi.”
“Uhh. Ahh.”
I walked by. I couldn’t talk to her. She
looked back, wondering, “What’s wrong with that guy?” I could tell
by the expression on her face. I was so embarrassed. Now she’d
never give me the time of day. That didn’t stop me. I vowed that
one day I would talk to her.
A week passed, and I tried again. Still, I
couldn’t get the words out. I would still look in her general
direction, but my voice was mute. Finally, I did respond to her. I
passed by her, and she said, “Hi there.”
“Uhh. Hi.”
I did it. I spoke to her. Now was that so
bad? No, it wasn’t. Now to get more than ‘Hi’ out. I had worked
with her for four months, and all I’ve said to her was ‘Hi’. What
else could I say to her?
Then, one day, I had to take a late lunch. By
coincidence, it was the same time that she took lunch. I usually
sit by myself. For some reason, Kimberly sat at my table today.
“Hi.”
“Hi”, I said under my voice.
“My name’s Kimberly. What’s yours?”
“Jeff.”
“So, you busy down there today?”
“Yeah.”
“Not very talkative, are we?”
“No.”
“C’mon. I don’t bite.”
“I know.”
“So, what do you do here?”
“Key some stuff.”
“Well, nice talking to you.”
“Okay.”
I blew it. My one chance to talk to her, and
I choked. She’d never want to talk to me again. What a first
impression! My only chance at redemption was to talk to her. I
tried, but I couldn’t. For three weeks, I tried with little
success. I figured that with all the guys she worked with, why
would she waste her time with me?
Again, I took a late lunch. Again, I sat
alone. Again, she sat with me.
“Hi, Jeff.”
“Hi.”
“I’ve noticed you noticing me.”
“Well, yeah.”
“Well, I’ve noticed you too.”
“You have?”
“Yeah. I think you’re kinda cute.”
“You do?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, I think you’re cute too.”
“Thanks. So, are you seeing anyone?”
“No.”
“Really. Me either.”
“Someone like you?”
“Yeah. So, what are you doing this
weekend?”
“Nothing.”
“Well, you want to go out this Saturday?”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. Maybe we can go to the movies or
something.”
“Well, Okay.”
“Great. Here’s my number. Give me a call this
week.”
“Okay. I will.”
“Well, see ya.”
Wow! What just happened here? A beautiful
woman asked me out. I spent all this time thinking of how to
express myself to her, and she turned around and does it to me.
Talk about ironic.
So, that night, I called her. We got to know
each other better. I was actually talking to her. We agreed to meet
around six o’clock Saturday night. I had a few days to figure out
how to impress her.
Saturday came. I was dressed in a nice
sweater and Dockers. I had a flower ready to give to her. I had
everything planned out. I was so nervous that I could hear my knees
knocking.
I arrived at her house around 5:45. I was
nervous walking to her house. I rang the doorbell. Her roommate
answered the door. She said Kimberly was still getting ready. So, I
waited for about ten minutes.
Suddenly, an angel descended the staircase.
Kimberly looked like a vision from Heaven. She was wearing a teal
skirt, white blouse, and white shoes. Her hair was all done up. I
stood there, my mouth agape.
“Hi, Jeff. You ready?”
“Wow! You look great.”
“Thanks. So do you.”
“Thanks. Oh, this is for you.” I give her a
pink rose.
“Oh. That’s so sweet. Thank you.”
We went. I first decided to take her to play
mini-golf. She’d never played before. I offered to teach her.
As we approached the first hole, an easy one,
I offered to go first to show her how it’s done. I placed the ball,
gripped the putter, swung back, and hit the ball. Hole-in-one! She
got excited.
Now, it was her turn. She placed her pink
ball on the tee. She wasn’t sure how to hit the ball or hold the
club. So, I stood behind her, putting her hands on the putter the
way they’re supposed to. I told her to stand with her feet spread
apart shoulder wide. We swung back and forward. Hole-in-one! She
jumped up and hugged me.
I helped her on a few other holes. She did
the rest on her own. To make her happy, unbeknownst to her, I let
her win. She was so elated to win.
Afterwards, we went to eat at a nice Italian
restaurant. I was a perfect gentleman, opening the door, pulling
out her chair, the works. She was eating this up. I ordered the
fettuccine alfredo; she ordered the veal parmigiana. Neither of us
drink, so we ordered Pepsi instead of wine. We got to know more
about each other while we waited for the food. We went through two
baskets of bread sticks waiting.
After dinner, we took a nice, long drive,
listening to some romantic music. We avoided all the traffic.
It was peaceful. I had trouble keeping my
eyes on the road because of her beauty.
Finally, we got back to her place. I walked
her to her door, holding her hand.
“Well, I had a wonderful time tonight,” she
said.
“Me too. I hope we can do this again
sometime.”
“How ‘bout next Saturday?”
“Great. I’ll call you.”
She leaned over and kissed me square on the
lips. I staggered back to the car. I felt dizzy. My lips were numb.
I’d never felt better in my life.
The next week, we exchanged many a glance at
work. I was trying to figure out how to top our first date.
Saturday came again. I was dressed in a black
button-down shirt, black pants, and black dress shoes. I decided
against the flower on the second date. She answered the door,
wearing a royal blue pant suit.
“Hi, Kimberly.”
“Hello. Come on in.”
“Sorry I didn’t bring a flower this time. I
couldn’t find another one that so matched your beauty.”
She started to blush. “Thank you.”
“So, shall we go?”
“Okay. Where we going?”
“I figured we’d check out a movie. What kind
do you like?”
“Anything romantic.”
“I know the perfect movie.”
We went to the theater and sat way in the
back. We shared a bucket of popcorn. The movie started. I put my
arm around her. She rested her head on my chest. We both enjoyed
the movie.
From there, we went for a nice walk along the
river. We gazed up at the stars and moon. We looked at the Big
Dipper, Little Dipper, and Orion the Hunter. Well, at least she
did. My eyes were fixed on her.
We went back to her place. She invited me
inside for a drink. Her roommate was gone for the evening. We sat
on the sofa next to each other. She kissed me. Then, she did
something I didn’t expect.
She started kissing me more passionately. I
was surprised to feel her tongue inside my mouth and her hand
gripping my back side. She invited me to her room. What was I going
to say? No?
We went to her room. She started to unbutton
my shirt. I didn’t know what to do. This had never happened to me
before. She took off my shirt. She asked me to unbutton her top.
Nervously, I did. She was wearing a sexy red lace bra under her
top. She then proceeded to unbuckle my belt and unzip my pants.
Here I was, standing in my plain white BVD boxers. She took off her
pants. She was wearing red lace panties to match her top. She took
me to her bed. She put her hand down my boxers and massaged me. I
started feeling weird.