Dust to Dust: A Broken Fairy Tale (6 page)

Jess just stands there in all her exotic beauty, snuggling into her husband while he plays with her long auburn hair, unaware of how perfect her life seems. Jess married her high school sweetheart, Dave, right after college and they have a five-year-old girl together. She still lives here in Mantoloking, where Dave is now the town sheriff. They have a marriage that everyone envies. Dave’s soft yet tough demeanor complements the spitfire that is Jess in every way. He keeps her in line when needed…which is more than he probably wishes, but he always has a smile and kiss for her in the end. It’s sweet to see how much in love they still are. Once again, I’m reminded of the fact that Marcus no longer feels that way about me.

“Don’t give her any ideas, Jess. I don’t know how you can still live here year round. This place is like a ghost town unless it’s summer.” Marcus’s condescending tone doesn’t bother Jess.

“I remember a time when all you did was talk about moving down here, Marky dear. The city is no place to raise children,” she quips back in her sassy way.

“Alright you two, that’s enough.” Dave speaks up, not wanting to deal with their bickering that is constant lately. Jess and Marcus used to be close, and now all they do was argue with each other. I haven’t even told her the details of my failing marriage. I can only imagine her wrath when she knows.

Ellie and Sophie show up just in time, bouncing into our arms with Holden and Bridgette close behind. Holden has his arm casually wrapped around Bridgette’s petite waist, rubbing it sweetly. Jess looks at me, rolling her eyes at Holden’s affection towards his girlfriend. While it doesn’t bother me at all, Jess still hates anyone who Holden brings around, and always has. Jess was ecstatic when Holden bought back his parent’s house, and has been working overtime to get the three of us back where we were before our friendship was lost. I mouth for her to stop it and be nice to Bridgette. In her usual stubborn style, Jess shakes her head no and continues to unabashedly glare a hole through Bridgette’s head.

Sophie holds up two long thin boxes to me, and I know instantly what they are. I give Holden a frustrated glare.

Sophie cuts off my impending verbal assault of Holden with her excitement. “Mommy, Uncle Howden gaf us spawklers. We have bowxes and bowxes of dem. He said we have to shawre, but dere awre so many, I don’t cawre that I have to shawre.”

“Wow, sparklers for a two-year-old. Nifty,” I say, giving my sweet girl a kiss, unable to hold back my smile at her excitement.

“Don’t worry, Camryn. I told Holden that if he is giving Sophie sparklers, he is in charge of helping her when it’s time to light them,” Bridgette says, noticing my hesitation.

“Hey, Ellie and Sophie are mine when the fireworks start since my date is ditching me.” He kisses the top of Bridgette’s head as the girls bounce happily in our laps, making both Marcus and I laugh. Jess makes an audible groan.

“That reminds me, Cam.” Marcus speaks up. “I have to head back into the city tonight too.”

I sit up, completely taken aback by this. He cuts me off before I can question him in front of our friends. “I totally forgot with the craziness when I got in, but I need to be in the office first thing in the morning.”
Bullshit.

I try to hold back the tears. All of his affection and attention really is just an act for him. Marcus really
is
moving on. “This will be the first Fourth of July we have been apart. You’ve never had to work on the fifth. Never.” My voice shakes and I try with everything in me to hide the anger and hurt knowing he’s leaving to be with
her.
He doesn’t need to admit it; I’m not stupid.

He ignores me and kisses Ellie on her cheek as he stands up. “Come on, girls. Let’s go light a few of these before Daddy has to go.”

Ellie and Sophie chase after their dad, oblivious of what has just happened. However, our friends are not.

“Asshat! Are you going to continue to put up with this, Cam? He isn’t the same person anymore. You don’t have to put yourself through this.” Jess doesn’t know the half of my problems with Marcus; she just sees how disconnected he is from our family lately. He never comes down to the shore with us anymore. He doesn’t spend time with any of our old friends the way he used to. He is clearly stepping away from me.

Joey simply turns towards the bar and begins filling shot glasses. “I don’t know about you guys, but I’d say it’s time to celebrate. Marcus out, Holden in. Just like the old days.” Joey has never been a fan of Marcus. He’s been one of Holden’s best friends since I can remember, and we have always been fiercely protective of one another.

Dave gives me a sympathetic smile, letting me know that he knows more about Marcus and me than he is letting on. I know he will keep his skepticism from Jess, and that gives me some relief right now.

Jess holds her hand out to me. “Come on, Cam, let’s have a drink.”

I force a smile, taking her hand in mine, walking towards the bar. Holden has his hand still wrapped around Bridgette’s waist when he grabs my other hand, helping me up. He looks at me with questioning eyes, as if he is trying to put a puzzle together. I quickly look away, not wanting to feel guilty for keeping all of this from him. Until now I have been telling him my marriage is perfect. I lie every time we speak about Marcus, make excuses for his absence, but now, it seems my friends are on to me.

“None for me. I have to get going. Thank you for your hospitality, though.” Bridgette surprises us with her quick exit. She turns to Holden and gives him a deep kiss in front of all of us. Jess begins gagging and coughing loudly, pretending as if the sight of them kissing is about to make her barf, and then acts as if something is caught in her throat when Holden shoots her a death glare. A part of me feels bad for Bridgette. I really do like her a lot. But Jess is just so blatantly possessive of Holden, it makes me laugh sometimes. She knows Holden and I will never be together again; she just hasn’t met anyone else she deems good enough for him yet.

I give Bridgette a warm hug, hoping to reassure her that she is always welcome here. After Bridgette leaves, Jess jumps up and down, clapping. “Now we can get this party started. No outsiders allowed.”

“Jess, there are about fifty ‘outsiders’ all over this party. Be nice!” I protest.

“Come on, Cam, you have put up with enough today. Let’s just have fun and ignore the rest of the party. I am officially relieving you of hostess and parenting duties.” She taps the top of my head with her cocktail straw as if she has the power to take all of my responsibilities away.
How I wish she could
.

“Says who, Jess?” I ask, rolling my eyes.

“Says me. Holden here already promised to watch the girls, and I’ll handle your parents,” Jess answers confidently. I can’t help but smile at her insistence.

Holden takes my hand and leads me up to the bar, nodding his head in agreement. His eyes are still filled with questions I know he wants answered. “She’s right, Cam. We are all here for you. Let us handle everything tonight and you relax.”

I smile at them all, so glad that I have such a close group of friends who truly love me. They don’t need explanations; they know those will come. They know I just need them right now. It’s a good feeling to know that as bad as things get, they will be here for me and my girls.

“To friends,” Joey says, holding his glass high with a white liquor pouring over the edge. I don’t care what I’m drinking; I just want to relax and disappear.

“To friends!” we all repeat, clinking glasses.

Jess and I grimace to each other as the warm liquid slides down my throat, making my insides warm. We both giggle, putting our glasses down quickly as if it can make the bitter taste in our mouths go away. “One more, bartender. We have a long night ahead of us,” Jess croaks out, still recovering from the tequila.

I start to protest, but get a death glare from Jess and think better of it. Jess is right, and I want to forget that my husband is breaking my heart on another holiday to most likely go be with his mistress. Tequila is in order.

“That’s my girl!” Dave hollers and pushes our glasses over to Joey, who is filling them back up. I try not to look at Holden, even though I can feel his eyes boring into me. It’s like heat missiles are heading straight to my head from his glare. I know he’s only checking to see that I am alright, but it still makes me uneasy. Everything between us before tonight has been so casual and innocent. We have become best friends again, and I have never been happier with our relationship. But the way he is now looking at me makes me uncomfortable. He seems as if it is hurting him to see me this way…to know I am hurting. I know he is angry I haven’t told him about my marriage troubles once in all the time we’ve been together this year.

Joey must have noticed the death glare Holden is giving me. “Hey, Holden, grab your freaking shot and quit mad dogging Camryn.” He hands me my shot and continues, “What did you expect her to say to us…‘Hey guys, great to see you, my husband is an asshole.’?”

I spit my drink in shock. “Joey!” I exclaim, trying to compose myself. I don’t want anyone else here knowing about the demise of my marriage, especially my parents. Marcus has always treated me so well. He always used to put me first. It is killing me that this drastic change is taking place in front of my closest friends.

Hayden throws back his shot and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, still eyeing me. “How long has this been going on, Cam?”

I smile nervously.
I.Am.Not.Doing.This.
“Oh, come on guys, it’s just a rough patch. We are fine.” I grab my beer with one hand and Jess’s hand with the other. “The girls are probably dying to have some dessert. Let’s go grab them so Marcus can get on his way.”

“You got it, sister,” Jess answers without hesitation.

I am eager to get away from Holden and his judgmental stare. “You’re on babysitting duty soon, so don’t get too drunk with these guys.” I cover my heartbreak with a smile and blow the boys a kiss. “Thanks, guys.”

When I approach Marcus with the girls, I notice that they were both crying. “Marcus, what happened? Are they okay?”

“They’re fine. I was saying goodbye to them and they got a little disappointed is all.” He’s not telling me something, and Jess notices too.

“Hey Sophie and Ellie, I have two giant cupcakes with your name on it.” Jess winks at me and swings Sophie in her arms and leads the girls away. I watch thankfully when their sad faces light up and Holden sweeps Ellie in his arms, waving boxes of sparklers in the air. Sophie and Ellie are surrounded by my best friends, all focused on making them happy.
I am not alone.

I turn to Marcus. “Can we talk before you go?” I ask, trying to hold my tears back. I am feeling more courageous now after the shots and want to know the truth. I
have
to know the truth.

“I was going to ask you the same thing, but I don’t want to talk here. Not with all these people around. Let’s walk across the street to the beach,” he says, not looking me in the eyes.

I don’t answer. I begin walking past Jess and the group, giving them a weak smile while Marcus follows close behind, oblivious of the fact that they are on to him just as much as I am. The girls cling to him tightly, crying as they say goodbye, making me wonder what he said to them to make them so upset. Ellie and Sophie are never this upset. Everyone watches them, just as confused as I am.

I lean into Jess. “We’re heading over to the beach to talk. Make sure Holden keeps the girls occupied, please.”

She kisses my cheek and slaps my bottom. “You got it. They are in good hands.”

I look over at my girls. She’s right. Sophie and Ellie are dancing around in Dave and Holden’s arms with cupcake frosting all over their face, while Joey is singing “Born in the USA” and having the time of their life. In only seconds, those men made their sadness disappear.
Two points, Holden.

Marcus quickly says goodbye to my parents, who also are clearly questioning his short stay at their party. I am sure they know something is up between us, but they will wait until I’m alone to ask. He doesn’t speak to me, hold my hand, or look at me the entire five minutes it takes us to get to the beach. I am teetering between fear, anger, and heartbreak, knowing in the pit of my stomach this is not going to be good. Since our talk on Christmas Eve, things have only gotten worse between us every day. The more I try to be an attentive and loving wife, the more he pulls away. It is as if he made his decision long ago and is just now going through the motions.

I sit down at the water’s edge, letting my toes dig into the sand, helping to keep me grounded. Marcus doesn’t sit; he just stands hovering nervously above me.

“Cam, I can’t sit. I can’t even look at you right now. It’s all too much.” He rubs the back of his neck, reminding me how much I always love doing that while we drive down the street in our car. It is one of his favorite things. Or at least was.

I don’t say anything. I just sit numbly, looking at the waves rolling up the shore, barely touching my toes.

He continues nervously, “I’m officially filing for a divorce. I want us to work, but I don’t think it’s going to. I love you, Cam. I do. I just can’t keep living in this marriage with you so closed off.”

When I’ve imagined how this would all actually go down, I’ve always pictured myself calm and collected. I am taking long deep breaths because I am about to blow the composed image I’ve imagined. I am
pissed!
How dare he say I am closed off when I have virtually kissed his ass for years, turning myself into a Stepford wife? I look ahead, too afraid of what I will say if I look in his eyes.

“How dare you put this on me when you’re the one having an affair?”

He stops pacing, and I hear a deep sigh. Before he can defend himself, I cut him off. “At least give me the courtesy of not denying it. I saw you with her. I know that’s why you’re leaving tonight, so please spare me the guilt trip.” I hold back the tears, not wanting him to see me cry, not wanting him to know how he is killing me with his decision. “Just so we are clear, it is
you
who gave up on us and our family. It is
you
who is leaving us.”