Easy Silence (7 page)

“Here?” he asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. “Yeah, why not? It’s a beautiful night.”

He always seemed to be having an internal battle with himself whenever I would ask him something. “Whatever,” he finally responded.

“Well, if you don’t want to…”

“No…I said it was fine,” he snapped.

He pulled down the tailgate of his truck, and I took a seat while he stood around, nervously skipping rocks on the water. After five minutes of watching his monotonous repetition, I felt the need to finally speak up. “You know, you can sit down. I don’t bite.”

He turned around and finally faced me. I was just able to make out his strong features in the moonlight, and my eyes briefly filled with tears. He was so beautiful on the outside but completely broken on the inside. After throwing one final rock into the water, he took a seat next to me, making sure that he maintained enough distance between us. The crickets were singing their familiar tune, the sweet smell of wisteria was wafting through the air, and Jaxson was sitting only a few inches away, looking somewhat at peace with himself; this made my heart happy. All my worries ceased to exist in the peaceful quiet we were creating. I inched my hand closer to his until our fingertips were touching. He let out a deep breath, but didn't shy away when I moved my hand on top of his and intertwined our fingers. And, in that instant, the ocean was as gentle as the pond in front of us. I wasn't sure how long it would remain that way, but for now, I was basking in its calmness.

My head was resting on Jaxson's shoulder when he gently nudged me awake. "Oh my god, how long was I sleeping?" I asked, stretching my neck up at him.

"I don't know about a half hour."

"Why didn't you wake me?" I looked down at our hands, still latched together.

He shrugged. “I liked watching you sleep." His face reddened, and he looked away as my stomach fluttered ever so slightly. He cleared his throat, unlatched our hands, and hopped out of the back of the truck. "Ready?" he asked. The sweetness that was in his voice from just moments ago had disappeared as he came back to his senses.

“Yup,” I responded, jumping down and heading to the passenger’s seat. He got in, and we were on our way. I rested my head against the cool glass of the window as we drove down the bumpy dirt road. “So, catching frogs is pretty fun.” I finally spoke the first words five minutes into the ride home. He didn’t respond. “So, what got you into that
hobby?
” I teased.

“You don’t want to know.”

I creased my eyebrows in confusion. “What? Were you trying to find a princess?” I giggled. He stared blankly ahead, never taking his eyes off the road. “Get it? You know how they say you have to kiss a few frogs before you find your prince?”

He turned his head in my direction once we stopped at the traffic light and narrowed his eyes at me. “My life was never a fuckin’ fairy tale…not even close.”

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, deciding to shut up. My feeble attempt at conversation seemed to be upsetting him, and the last thing I wanted to do was end this perfect night on a bad note.

He threw the truck in park once we reached my grandmother’s. I had my hand on the car door, stalling, in hopes that maybe he would make plans to see me again. “Well, thanks for that experience. Guess I can now check off frog catching from my bucket list.” I laughed.

“Welcome,” he replied, straight faced.

I bit my bottom lip, feeling like a fool. I really needed to learn to shut my mouth when I was ahead. I was finding that less was more with Jaxson. “Umm…so, I was wondering? Did you want to exchange phone numbers? You know? Just in case you ever need a frog catching buddy.”

“No. I usually do it alone.”

“Oh…okay.”
Really, Sam? Less is so much more.
I needed to get out of the truck before my ego was bruised anymore. Clearly, he didn’t enjoy my company as much as I enjoyed his.

“Besides, I don’t have a cell phone,” he blurted out once I was halfway out of the truck.

“Oh…” I creased my eyebrows. Who in this day and age didn’t have a cell phone? I began to feel badly, wondering if he couldn’t afford one.

“I don’t believe in carrying a phone everywhere I go. I don’t believe in email or any of that shit. If people need me, they can find me or send me a letter…on paper.”

“Oh, I guess that makes sense.” Really, it didn’t, but I couldn’t think of anything else to say about his bizarre stance on modern technology.

“Well then, I guess you know where to find me…if you ever change your mind and want to bring me along again. I really did have fun tonight.”

I had my back toward him, ready to step out. “Samantha?” he whispered.

“Hmm…”

“Thank you for coming with me tonight.”

“Thanks for inviting me.” I turned around and leaned over, gently pressing my lips on his. He stared at me for a moment before grabbing the back of my neck and kissing me back with a lot more passion. Our tongues began to dance in perfect unison, and our heavy breathing was the only sound to be heard in his truck. Once we finished our kiss, I stared into his eyes and pressed my forehead against his. “Just in case you need to find me, I’ll be on the beach all day tomorrow…our spot. Not that you may be looking but…just in case.”

“Our spot?” He looked confused.

“Yes, the spot where I first saw you standing on the beach.” I brushed my lips against his and hopped out of his truck.

“See ya, Jaxson,” I said.

He smiled, and I couldn’t help but smile back, hoping that it meant he would be seeing me, too.

I tried convincing myself that I wasn’t wearing my brand new bathing suit to try and impress Jaxson
if
he decided to show. Then I tried telling myself that I wasn’t getting disheartened over the fact that I had been sitting in this same spot on the beach for the past three hours with no sign of him. Who was I fooling? He wasn’t interested in me. I was basically throwing myself at him. I should have never mentioned meeting me here, then I wouldn’t be feeling so absolutely miserable with myself right now. I was just starting to pack up my stuff when a volley ball came rolling past my feet.

“Oh, sorry about that.” I put my sunglasses on my head and stared up at the pretty boy standing over me. He bent down and scooped the ball out of the sand.

“No problem,” I muttered, happy when he started to walk off. I wasn’t much in the mood for engaging in conversation with anyone, especially a stranger.

“Hey,” he turned around, approaching me once again. “Did you want to come and hang out with me and my friends?”

“Oh, no thanks,” I replied, packing up my beach bag.

He stared at me like he was waiting for me to change my mind. I had a feeling that he wasn’t used to being rejected by girls. “Well, did you want to hang out some other time? Just the two of us?”

I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but at the same time I didn’t want to lead him on. So, I did the next best thing. I lied. “Oh, I don’t think my boyfriend would appreciate that.”

“Oh, you have a boyfriend?” I nodded and flung my beach bag over my shoulder as I wrestled to get my beach chair closed. “Well, is it serious?”

God, this guy wasn’t going down easy. “Very.”

“Samantha.” I turned my head in the direction of the familiar voice, feeling like my heart was going to leap from my chest at the sight of Jaxson strolling toward me.

“Jaxson!” I exclaimed, trying my best to wipe the ridiculous grin from my face and failing miserably.

Pretty boy looked at Jaxson and then at me. “You’re kidding me? Your boyfriend is Jax Callahan?”

Shit. How the hell was I going to get myself out of this mess? The last thing I wanted was Jaxson to think I was telling people he was my boyfriend. That would really freak him out. “Umm…I—I—” I stuttered as Jaxson came closer.

“Hey Jax, what’s goin’ on, man?”

“Sup?” Jaxson replied, giving him an angry glare, making me wonder if these two had some sort of history, or if Jaxson was angry at him for talking to me. I laughed to myself over that outlandish thought. Jaxson barely tolerated me, so why would he be jealous if some other guy was talking to me?

“Well, I’m heading back to my volleyball game. Sorry, didn’t know she was your girl.”

I quickly gauged Jaxson’s reaction. Flat and expressionless like normal. So, that was a good sign. I waited until pretty boy was out of earshot before explaining myself. “I—I didn’t tell him you were my boyfriend. He just asked me to hang out with him, and I had to think of something to say, so I just told him my boyfriend wouldn’t appreciate it. Then he saw you and kinda assumed—”

“Why didn’t you just tell him to fuck off?”

“Umm…I don’t know. I thought I’d be a little more subtle.” He looked over at the guy we were just talking to and his group of friends.

“They’re all a bunch of pussies.” And there went my theory of him being jealous. He obviously had some type of beef with this kid prior to this. “So, do you?” he turned his attention back to me.

“Do I what?” I asked.

“Have a boyfriend?”

I shook my head and looked away. His eyes settled on me, and I could feel them moving downward as he checked me out in my bikini.

“I was just getting ready to leave. I didn’t think you were coming.”

“I was working.” His gaze was intense, always making me feel like he was looking right through me.

“Oh.” His communication skills sucked. If he had told me last night that he was working until a certain time, then I wouldn’t have wasted the last three hours sitting here, baking in the sun while I waited for him. “Well, you’re here now, so let’s hang out.” I began to unfold my chair. He turned his attention back to the group of guys and girls playing volleyball as their hoots and hollers became louder each time the ball would pass the net. I could tell it was getting on his nerves, and I had to admit it was annoying me a bit as well.

“Fine, but let’s go down by the water.”

“Sounds good to me.” I left my stuff up on the beach, and we headed down to the water each taking a seat in the sand.

The familiar silence fell among us once again as we both stared out at the water. “Ocean looks a lot calmer today than it’s been,” I said in an effort to make conversation.

“Just cause it looks that way, doesn’t mean it is. There’s rip currents hiding under those waves.” He pointed to the wave that was just breaking. “See the way the foam on that water is being pulled away from the beach?” I nodded. “The rip is under that foam.”

“You’re a pretty smart guy.”

His face reddened. I could tell he wasn’t used to hearing compliments. “Just comes from living in a beach town my whole life.”

“Have you ever thought about going to college?”

He let out a loud chuckle. “I’m lucky I even graduated from high school. If it weren’t for Pete being on my ass about it, I probably wouldn’t have.”

“So, what do you want to do with your life?” I asked, nervously digging in the wet sand.

“Survive.” I turned my head from the ocean and stared at him looking straight ahead, hoping he would elaborate a little more. “Thinking about joining the Army. I took the entrance test and already talked to a recruiter.”

I nodded. “So, what’s holding you back?”

“I don’t know,” he whispered. “What are you digging for?” he asked looking down at the deep hole I created over the course of our short conversation.

“Nothing, really.” I let out a deep sigh. “Hey, do you feel like helping me find some seashells to add to my collection?”

“Yeah, whatever,” he replied, standing up, waiting for me to follow. I hoisted myself from the sand and stumbled a bit before catching my balance. We began to walk, stopping every now and then to pick up different looking shells that caught our eyes. “So, what do you do with these shells?” he asked.

“Lots of things. Sometimes I fill up vases or glass bottles and display them that way, or sometimes I attempt to make jewelry with them. My grandmother was always good at that. She taught me a little, but I’m nowhere near as talented as she was with it.”

“Is she dead?” he blurted out.

“Who?” I creased my eyebrows.

“Your grandmother? You said she
was
talented.”

“Oh no…she has Alzheimer’s.”

He nodded. “Well, she’d probably be better off dying.”

“Excuse me?” I snapped over his bluntness.

“Would you want to suffer, not knowing who anyone was, living in your own little world? Basically becoming a stranger not only to yourself, but to everyone else around you.” He raised his eyebrow at me.

“Umm…if you’re asking if I want my grandmother to die…the answer is no. I love her more than anything, and she’s still here, living and breathing, so that’s all the matters.”

“You’re selfish.”

“What!?” I could feel my anger rising, even more so when I saw the smile that was slowly appearing on his face over my annoyance.

“Don’t get pissed at me, Samantha. I’m just stating a fact…you fall into the majority.”

“The majority of what?” I stopped walking, wanting him to clarify.