Effortless (26 page)

As I was debating it, Candy twisted in her seat. Spotting me,
she glared, then rolled her eyes. Twisting back to Tina, she said
something that made them all laugh, then Tina twisted to look at
me. I flushed deep, coming up with a list of insults that she could
have said. I guess she hadn’t backed off as much as I thought.
Maybe Kellan had been gone for long enough that her confidence had
boosted back up. Oh well, didn’t matter. Candy could like me or
hate me, it didn’t change my relationship with Kellan.

Noticing the look, Cheyenne commented. “Candy sure has evil eyes
for you. What did you ever do to her anyway?” Leaning in, she
smiled. “You’re far too sweet for anyone not to like.”

I smiled at Cheyenne warmly, thinking that she should have seen
me last year. I was anything but sweet then, constantly betraying
Denny, breaking Kellan’s heart over and over. Shaking my head to
clear away the memories, I shrugged. “She wanted to be the one
dating the rock star.” Looking over at Candy, I smiled even wider.
“But the rock star wanted to date me.” Wishing my dream had been
real this morning, I sighed.

Cheyenne laughed and muttered something about Candy needing to
get over herself. A burly guy walked down the aisle in front of us.
He sat in the seat directly in front of me, making the entire thing
squeak a little. As he shifted to get comfortable, I noticed
something at the bottom of the chair. It was a scrap of paper,
oddly stuffed into the edge of the seat, nearly invisible.

Smirking, I wondered if Kellan had shoved it there, one last
impossible note for me to find. On a whim, I reached down and
pulled the paper free. It took a second to jiggle it out of where
it had been jammed. Cheyenne watched me curiously. When I finally
had it, she pointed at it. “What’s that?”

Shaking my head, I sighed again. “Probably nothing.” Probably
just my overactive imagination.

Unfolding the wadded-up paper, I busted out laughing. I had to
slap my hand over my mouth to not cause a scene in the
starting-to-get quiet room. It
was
from Kellan. On the
tiny piece of paper he’d written,
‘Quit thinking of me naked
and study, it’s the ethical thing to do.’

Still chuckling, I shook my head. How did he know I was having
erotic dreams about him? Releasing my hand from my mouth, I trailed
a finger over the words he’d created. Sighing, I wondered if he was
having erotic dreams about me, too. I sort of hoped he was.

Cheyenne beside me giggled. “That from Kellan? He’s pretty
funny.” She shook her head. “Gorgeous and funny, no wonder Candy
hates you.”

Laughing at her comment, my eyes swept over some of the other
chairs. How had he known I’d pick this particular seat? I really
had been extremely lucky to find this note at all. When I started
spotting tiny corners of papers sticking out of some of the other
seats, I reconsidered. I wasn’t lucky…Kellan had tucked notes
everywhere. My God, that must have taken him forever. When the hell
had he done that? And what did they all say? As the professor had
just started class, I couldn’t start collecting them yet. I’d have
to wait until after class to find out. My smile was huge all
throughout the final exam…I’m sure I was quite possibly the
happiest person taking it.

Cheyenne waved goodbye after class, wishing me luck on my
scores. Smiling at her, I pretended to take forever gathering my
stuff together. When the room was mostly empty, I began my
note-seeking quest. It took me a while, but I eventually recovered
every scrap that Kellan had tucked away. When all the chairs were
clean, I ended up with about a hundred little messages. I
immediately went home, to ponder them all in the privacy of my
room. Some were hot, some were sweet, but all of them were a joyful
surprise. He’d done so much to make sure that I wouldn’t forget
him, almost like he was still scared that I would. Clutching the
necklace around my throat, I shook my head. My eyes stung with
tears. Like I ever could.

Tucking a note that merely said,
‘I love you,’
into my
pocket, I started to get ready for work.  Since today had been
the last day of school for all of the college kids, we were
expecting it to be pretty busy. Especially since our new band had
started to gather a fan base around themselves.

I wasn’t too thrilled with someone else being up on Kellan’s
stage, but I had to admit that the group was good. Evan and Kellan
had signed them up for Pete before heading out of town. The Seattle
music scene was sort of a small social circle, with everybody
knowing everybody else, and Kellan had thought that this particular
group of guys would be the best fit for the bar.

When I say guys, I should clarify…I mean girls. Yeah, Kellan had
signed up a girl band. Don’t get me wrong, they rocked like any
other male band on the planet, but, I smirked when I saw them for
the first time. I had the distinct feeling that Kellan had picked a
group of girls on purpose. Wouldn’t want me fawning over another
male, moody artist.

Putting my stuff away in the back room an hour later, I was
assaulted by my peppy best friend. Wrapping her arms around me,
Jenny kissed my cheek. “Hey, Kiera. How was your last class?”

I grinned like a dopey idiot, thinking about the dozens of love
notes currently sprawled across my bed. “Wonderful…” I exhaled, a
little dreamily. Jenny looked at me like I was mental. And I
supposed my love-filled sigh was sort of a strong reaction to
taking a final. Laughing a little, I shrugged. “What can I say, I
love school.”

Smiling crookedly, she shook out her golden locks. “You’re so
weird.”

Playfully batting her on the arm, the two of us headed out to
start our shifts. In the hallway, we were stopped by someone
exiting the bathroom. “Oh, hey, Kiera, Jenny.”

Looking over to the doors, I contained a sigh. A member of the
girl band playing tonight was smiling at me. They called themselves
Poetic Bliss, and the girl heading my way was the lead singer. Her
name was Rain, but I was pretty sure that wasn’t what was written
on her birth certificate. Pretty sure, since the other band
member’s names were Blessing, Meadow, Sunshine, and…Tuesday.

I had a really hard time saying that last one with a straight
face. I wasn’t sure if they’d all changed their names once joining
the band, or if a group of uniquely named girls had just happened
to come across each other. I was leaning more towards the name
change. The only thing I was certain of, was that Rain knew my
boyfriend in ways that most women around here seemed to know my
boyfriend. Intimate ways. That was why I always wanted to sigh
every time she talked to me. There was a definite downside to
dating a former man whore.

Jauntily walking up to me, I tried to not picture her entangled
with Kellan. It was kind of hard to not think about it, though. She
was spunky, energetic, one of those people that was constantly
moving. I kept imagining her being sort of…wild…behind closed
doors. Knowing that I really wasn’t outrageously great in bed or
anything, I immediately felt like I fell short. But love and lust
were different things, and all of her playful antics hadn’t made
Kellan fall for her, so I must be doing something right.
Besides…Kellan never complained about our sex life.

Rain came up and gave me a swift hug. “Hey, thank Kellan again
for lining up this gig for me. It’s awesome here, I love it!” The
petite woman was three or four inches shorter than me but she made
up for it by wearing six-inch heels on her chunky boots. With her
jet-black hair cropped into a short, shaggy mess and her dark eyes
highlighted in dramatic shades of gray and pink, she looked the
part of a tough rocker chick. The clingy, low-cut shirt and
barely-there pleated miniskirt completed the look. Well, that and
the spiked collar around her neck.

“Yeah, I’ll tell him,” I mumbled, wishing I could go back in
time and tell a much younger Kellan that saying no was a perfectly
acceptable response to come-ons, that sex wasn’t the same as love.
But I’m pretty sure young Kellan wouldn’t have listened. He’d had
to figure that one out on his own.

Reaching my hand in my pocket to feel his note, I added, “Have a
great night up there. You guys are sounding really good.”

She tilted her dark head at me, bouncing up on her toes a little
bit. “Thanks! I was so excited to play tonight. I couldn’t wait to
get here.” She looked around the mostly empty hallway. “When do the
cute guys come in anyway?”

I bit back a smile. Well, they usually strolled in hours before
they played, too. Shrugging, I only told her, “Business picks up in
an hour or so.”

She nodded, giggling. “I’m gonna shoot some pool then. Catch you
later!” With that, she turned and skipped down the hall, the pleats
of her skirt showing way more of her bare leg than I’d ever dare to
show in public.

Jenny looped her arm through mine. “Stop it right now.”

I looked back at her, frowning. “Stop what?”

“Comparing yourself.” She nodded up the hall to where the
sprightly girl had disappeared. “I know you heard her and Rita
talking about having sex with Kellan. I saw your face when they
were describing their moments.” She frowned. “Well, before you
hightailed it and ran…and I don’t blame you for that one.”

I cringed, remembering walking into a conversation that I’d
never wanted to hear…ever. Apparently Rita and Kellan’s hookup had
happened right here at the bar, after closing one night. And when I
say “bar” I mean that literally…he’d taken her right next to the
soda dispenser. I’d dashed out of the conversation just as Rain had
been explaining how they’d made his car shake so much that she’d
been worried it would tip over. I was not thrilled to have that in
my head every time I drove his…baby…somewhere.

 I sighed as I started walking down the hall. “It doesn’t
matter. That’s his history,” I smiled weakly, “and I’m his future.”
Hopefully.

Jenny clapped me on the back, smiling brightly. “That’s the
spirit. Now the next time you say it, say it without looking like
your puppy just died.”

I laughed at her comment, genuinely feeling better. I still
clutched Kellan’s love note all throughout my shift, though,
especially when Poetic Bliss took the stage.

When I got home that night and stared at all of the evidence of
Kellan’s affection around my room—notes, lyrics, pictures—I grabbed
a suitcase from my closet and started packing. I was leaving Monday
with my sister to head back home for the holidays. By this time
next week, Kellan and I would be reunited. Just the thought spurred
me to action. I couldn’t sleep, I needed to do something, and
packing seemed as good a distraction as any.

Humming one of Poetic Bliss’s songs to myself, I pulled out my
warmest sweaters. I made sure I included the ugly green one that
made me look like a frumpy housewife. My parents had given it to me
last year and I knew my mom would ask about it if I didn’t wear it.
Since I’d invited Kellan to crash the party, I wanted them in the
best mood possible.

Stuffing some socks around the edge of my bag, I startled when
my phone trilled at me. Seeing who was calling, I brightened even
more. “Hey, you,” I sighed, “I’ve missed you all day.”

Kellan laughed in my ear, the sound sending a shiver down my
spine. “I missed you, too. Anything noteworthy today?”

He emphasized the word note and I giggled, sitting down on my
pile of them. “Ah, yeah, actually. The cleaning staff at school has
been slacking off lately. I found at least a hundred slips of paper
that the janitors missed.”

“Hmmm…just a hundred? Guess some got nabbed by your classmates.”
He laughed again. “I hope they got the kinky ones.”

I flushed, wondering what he meant by kinky. Biting my lip, I
smiled and ran a hand back through my hair. “I’m packing right
now…I can’t wait to see you next week.” I looked out the window,
east, to where he was miles and miles away from me. “Is there
anything you need from your place? I could grab it?”

“I can’t wait to see you either. In fact, I bought this lingerie
for you before I left, tucked it away for when I got back…you could
bring that?”

I sat up straight, flushing even more. I had no idea if he was
joking or not. “Uh, I don’t…um…”

He chuckled in my ear as I stammered for a response. Just the
thought of wearing something sultry and having those bedroom eyes
wash over me…it made me tingle. “I’m kidding, Kiera. You don’t have
to dress sexy for me…you already are.”

Smiling, I looked down at the plain tank top and lounge pants
I’d put on. Yep, that was me…sexy as all get out.  I sighed
and he heard it. “You okay?”

Not meaning to say anything, I blurted out, “Rain says thank
you…again.”

“Oh.” His voice sounded surprised. He’d probably been expecting
something much different to come out of my mouth. “Well, tell her
it was no big deal. Her band is great, they deserve the
opportunity.”

“Yeah,” I muttered, “And she’s not one to pass up an
opportunity.” I bit my lip and cringed, hating that I’d actually
said that out loud. I hated sounding jealous and petty.

Kellan, of course, heard my tone and deciphered it correctly.
His voice a little tight, he quietly said, “She told you, didn’t
she?”