Authors: Katharine Kerr
"I'll try," she whispered.
She left the spear and rope behind, and never again dreamed
of Yggdrasil, the father of forests.
My Soul Into me Bougns
A Gothic Tale
by Teresa Edgerton
Teresa Edgerton's most recent book is her eighth fantasy
navel. The Moon and the Thorn. Before she wrote "My
Soul into the Boughs," she spent some months reading
fairy tales and Victorian horror stories which could ac-
count for a certain spookity hybrid quality in her story,
There are owls nesting in the rafters over her bed. Lying trapped
under the covers, her limbs weighted with sleep. Laurel cannot
see the birds, but she knows they are there. She can hear a duU
fluttering of wings, a harsh scrape of talons on the heavy oak
beams, and she can picture the owls vividly in her mind; great
white predatory birds with ominous yellow eyes.
At the same time, she realizes there is something very strange
about her bedchamber, the broad, pleasant room that appeared
so ordinary by daylight—no sign of owls or nests among the raft-
ers then. But now there seems to be a stream running through, a
slow, steady trickle of cold water over her feet that is just as un-
accountable as it is chilly.
To make matters worse, every time the owls become particu-
larly active, she feels a sharp, painful tug on her scalp, as
though the hairs of her head have somehow grown to an incred-
ible length and become entangled with the branching rafters
overhead. With a sudden wrenching shock, she realizes all at
once that this is literally true: her hair has grown and involved
itself with the leaves and branches ... at the same time that her
toenails have anchored her to the footboard.
In a panic, she opens her mouth to scream, but the only sound
136
Teresa Eogerton
that emerges is low and tortured, like a creaking of tree limbs
during a storm.
"The most extraordinary dream," Laurel tells her grandmother,
over the breakfast table. "I actually believed I was turning into
a tree. I'm afraid there is something about the position of this
house and the way the trees grow in so close, that has made a re-
markable and rather unpleasant impression on my mind."
Mrs. Windboume reaches out with a hand as pale and skeletal
as me birches and the aspens surrounding the ancient manor
house, and pours herself a second cup of tea. "You find the sit-
uation oppressive? It is true we have very few visitors and none
of them linger very long. But I hoped you would be different,
that you would love the house ... and the forest as well." Her
voice trails away on a deep sigh.
"Because my mother was born here?" Laurel considers that, as
she raises her own cup of tea to her lips. She and her grand-
mother arc eating their breakfast in a dim sitting room attached
to the old lady's bedchamber. The room is dim because there is
no light except a beam of weak sunlight which has somehow
managed to creep in through a leaded glass window partly ob-
scured by vines; the sitting room is also damp and smells
strongly of earth, but the reason for this is less apparent. In one
shadowy comer a blotch of moisture has spread across the wall,
under a rogues' gallery of miniature portraits done in oils. To a
fanciful mind, an unfocused eye, the irregular stain might appear
as a frieze of leering foliate heads, created as an obscure jest on
the family pictures.
Laurel, however, is a practical young woman, and she only
sees a spot of damp. Besides, she is otherwise occupied, ponder-
ing the question at hand: Should she reel some particular affinity
to a particular location, merely because her mother and who-
knows-how-many of her more distant ancestors were bom on the
spot? It is not as though her mother ever regaled her with stories
about the place, not as though Laurel was reared with any sense
that the history of this decaying mansion on the verge of a pri-
meval forest is her own history as well. In fact, her mother never
shared any family history or childhood memories with her at all.
"It really is hard to know what I should or shouldn't feel,"
Laurel says out loud.
And not just about the house, she adds silently. What is she to
think, for instance, about the faded little creature in musty, rus-
tling autumn-colored silks, who sits on the other side of the
MY SOUL INTO THE BOUGHS 137
breakfast table, still a stranger for all the ties of blood that bind
them? "It is such an amazing set of circumstances, to suddenly
discover I have a grandmother I never even knew existed, and in
less than a month after that discovery to find myself staying with
you here."
Mrs. Windboume smiles. Despite her great age, her teeth ap-
pear very strong and even; it is the strange quality of the light,
probably, that gives them a greenish cast "Laurel dear, you must
have suspected there was a grandmother somewhere in your past.
Or did you suppose your mother came into existence in anything
other than the usual way ... brought forth out of the womb of
flie earth itself in some monstrous cataclysm, or else ripped out
by force like a mandrake root?"
Laurel laughs uneasily, because it is such an odd and improper
remark, especially considering the source. She takes another sip
of the tea. There are bits of bark floating among the tiny black
leaves, and the flavor of the tea is not like anything she has ever
tasted before. However, it smells of mushrooms and cellars.
"Let us say, then. a grandmother I supposed unalterably es-
tranged and probably long since dead," she amends. "And you
never did tell me what my mother did to offend you so badly,
that you and my grandfather refused to see her ever again."
Mrs. Windboume sits up a little straighter in her carved oak
chair. The carvings consist of owls and ivy in a highly involved
pattern. Laurel wonders if some brief glimpse the night before
was the source of her nightmare.
"Is that what your mother told you?" the old woman asks in-
dignantly. "But it was Linnet who turned her back on us, who
ran away from home after a trilling quarrel and never made any
attempt to communicate with any member of the family after-
ward." She subsides a little, brushes one hand over her eyes.
"Ftahaps both sides were equally to blame. We were each too
proud to even think of making the first move. And now it is too
late for your grandfather and for poor Linnet... but how fortu-
nate that you and I somehow managed to find each other before
the end."
It makes Laurel feel hot and uncomfortable under her light
summery dress, how frankly the old woman speaks of her own
imminent demise- It was one of the first things mentioned in her
lener—that remarkable document which arrived so unexpectedly
to announce Mrs. Windboume's existence and her desire for
reconciliation—and the spreading cancer was also one of the first
things they discussed when Laurel arrived at the house. Under
138 Teresa EJgerton
other circumstances such openness might make everything easier
and more natural, since it frees them both from so many eva-
sions. But again. Laurel is left not knowing how she ought to
feel. Should she grieve for this woman she hanily knows?
/ can grieve, anyway, for the time that has been denied us.
Feel disappointed I have so little opportunity to get really ac-
quainted with her, or to learn how to love her. Life can be so
beastly unfair sometimes!
"Grandmother, do you feel well enough to go out for a walk
this afternoon?" she asks, on a sudden conciliating impulse. "I
would so like for you to show me the garden and a little of the
forest"
"And I would like that also," Mrs. Wmdboume answers. "But
me doctor has warned me against too much air or exertion, and
I doubt I will ever leave these rooms again. However, do please
feel free to wander about as much as you like on your own."
Now Laurel thinks she has caught her grandmother in a lie.
There is a crust of mud on the soles of the old lady's shoes—
Laurel noticed it as soon as she came into the room—and a frail
leaf skeleton caught in the wispy white hair over one ear. It
seems obvious Mrs. Wmdboume has already been out for a walk
in the early morning air- But the old woman looks so ftail and
tired, me younger one feels a guilty disinclination to call her to
account
The garden is really nothing more than a patch of overgrown
ground between the back of the house and me ragged edge of the
encroaching woodlands. There is a stable, a thicket, a stagnant
fishpond, and beyond a tumbled drystone wall, what appears to
be a ruined chapel and a graveyard right in among the trees.
The weather is pleasant and not too warm, but everything
looks dull and lifeless: grass, trees, brambles, and a few scrubby
bushes over by me stable—everything limp and sapless. On the
trunks of some birches up ahead, the white bark is peeling off
like tissue paper. The oaks and the elms farther on are already
losing their leaves, and they look ugly in their semi-nakedness,
all contorted into shapes of agony. Laurel wonders if there has
been a drought in this part of the country, or if the forest and the
garden have been infected by some invisible blight Remember-
ing the dampness inside the house, she decides a drought is out
of the question.
Raising the hem of her white batiste skirt, she climbs through
a gap in the drystone wall and wanders among the gravestones.
MY SOUL INTO THE BOUGHS 139
One of them, a little taller than the rest and draped in vines that
look somewhat greener and fresher, catches her eye, and she
bends down to examine the chiseled inscription more closely.
"NICHOLAS WINDBOURNE," it proclaims. And below that, in
smaller and rounder letters: "Nicholas Perrin."
Standing by her grandfather's grave. Laurel again realizes how
little she knows of her family history. When and why did her
grandfather change his name? It seems an extraordinary, even a
slightly disreputable, thing to do. Like a man with a secret, she
muses.
At this moment, something sharp pierces her ankle. Glancing
down and lifting the hem of her skirt a chaste few inches off the
ground, Laurel discovers she has somehow blundered into one of
the thorny vines. Her ankle, under its delicate white silk stock-
ing, is scratched and spotted with blood. And now something
truly appalling begins to happen; the vine writhes, constricts, and
begins to crawl up her leg with a sinuous, sensuous movement
that is just as indecent as it is terrifying,
Laurel screams, tries to pull away, and in doing so, uninten-
tionally steps backward onto the grave ... only to leam mat the
soil there is so soft and so loose that she instantly starts to sink.
Within seconds, she is trapped in the devouring earth up to her
knees.
But a hard hand catches hold of her shoulder, a strong arm en-
circles her waist, and someone lifts her bodily out of the grave
and deposits her safely on solid ground.
Still gasping, Laurel turns to confront her rescuer.
He is a rough-looking fellow and her first impression is all in
shades of brown: shaggy russet hair; tawny face; amber eyes
flecked with something darker; a pair of broad shoulders under
an earth-colored coat. Further impressions are more complex: He
smells of smoke and autumn leaves. He is not much older than
she is herself, and rather attractive—in a crude, unfinished sort
of way. She likes the way his hand rests at the small of her back,
me pressure of one muscular, leather-clad thigh, felt through her
skirt and petticoat. He is holding her much loo closely.
Before she can act on any of this, he steps back and releases
her. Robbed of both her breath and her dignity. Laurel seeks to
restore both by smoothing her skirt, tidying her hair. It works tol-
erably well, and she is finally able to address him with a fair de-
gree of equanimity.
"I suppose I ought to thank you," she says primly.
He regards her solemnly, yet Laurel thinks she detects a flicker
140 Teresa Edgei-ton
of something ... arousal? ... curiosity? ... resentment? ... in
those amber eyes.
"You'll be the granddaughter," he states flatly, in a deep,
countrified burr.
Glancing down, Laurel sees that the entrapping tendril of vine
has withdrawn, disappeared; could it be that she only imagined
its astonishing, provocative behavior?
Feeling once more in control of the situation, she smiles gra-
ciously. "Yes, I am Laurel Springer, Mrs. Windboume*s grand-
daughter. But who are you?"
He waves a square brown hand in the direction of the stable
and on toward the house. "Josiah Marten. But you open any win-
dow and call out 'Joss.' That usually fetches me."
"Joss, then." Laurel permits her gaze to wander back to the
grave. Though she is well on the way to convincing herself that