Encyclopedia Brown and Dead Eagles (2 page)

BOOK: Encyclopedia Brown and Dead Eagles
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“Oh,” said Mike. “You’re one of those mouthy kids who believes guns should be outlawed.”
“I believe we should have better laws to control guns,” said Charlie.
“A gun doesn’t shoot by itself,” replied Mike sharply. “A gun does what its owner makes it do. Don’t control guns, kid. Cure the bad owners.”
“You can say the same nonsense about automobiles,” said Encyclopedia.
Mike stiffened. “Nonsense? Just what do you mean?”
“An automobile does what its owner makes it do,” said Encyclopedia. “So while you’re curing bad owners, get rid of all automobile laws—speed limits, traffic signals, drivers’ tests, fines, and jail terms.”
“Move on, wise guy,” growled Mike.
Encyclopedia stood his ground. “A golden eagle was shot in the clearing by the cliff less than an hour ago,” he said. “If you shot it, your rifle will still smell of powder.”
“Take one step nearer my rifle and I’ll break your leg,” warned Mike.
“Last year two eagles were shot in the same clearing,” said Charlie. “A scoutmaster saw you studying their nest earlier that night.”
“So I heard,” said Mike. “I was out walking —and I had my gun along in case I saw rattle-snakes. I stopped to admire the full moon, which was right above the cliff. I didn’t notice the nest, and I didn’t shoot any eagles!”
“You can’t help where the moon is,” said Encyclopedia. “But you can help lying!”
WHAT WAS MIKE’S LIE?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
(Turn to page 87 for the solution to The Case of the Dead Eagles.)
The Case of the Hypnotism Lesson
Throughout the year, Encyclopedia helped his father solve crimes at the dinner table. When school let out for the summer, he decided to help the children of the neighborhood as well.
So he opened his own detective agency in the garage.
Every morning after breakfast he hung out his sign.
Business was slow on Thursday until Dave Foster walked in. Dave was seven and full of questions.
“How do you tell a boy lobster from a girl lobster?” he asked.
“The girl lobster has a longer tail,” replied the boy detective.
The answer wasn’t worth twenty-five cents. Encyclopedia waited for more questions.
Instead, Dave said, “I think Bugs Meany cheated me.”
“If I know Bugs, he did,” said Encyclopedia confidently.
Bugs Meany was the leader of a neighborhood gang of tough older boys. They called themselves the Tigers. They should have called themselves the Mountaineers. They were never on the level.
“If Bugs had his honesty taken out, it would be a one-minute operation,” said Encyclopedia. “What did he do now?”
“He charged me a dollar to learn how to hypnotize a lobster,” said Dave.
“Go over that again,” said Encyclopedia.
Dave explained. An hour earlier, he had passed the Tigers’ clubhouse. Bugs and his pals had just returned from catching lobsters. They were seated around a boiling kettle, feasting.
“Bugs told me that he had caught eleven lobsters by hypnotizing them,” said Dave. “He asked if I wanted to learn the secret for a dollar.”
“It was an offer you couldn’t refuse,” said Encyclopedia.
“I thought so,” said Dave. “Bugs picked up a big lobster, the kind you pay a lot of money for in a restaurant. He waved his right hand at it.”
“The waving was for show,” said Encyclopedia. “He probably was squeezing the nerve centers on its back with his left hand.”
“No,” said Dave. “He held it up by the tail and muttered a lot of hocus-pocus. It didn’t move a muscle. Finally, Bugs said, ‘Okay, lobster, are you going to do your stuff or do you want to go into the hot pot?’ ”
“With a choice like that, what’s a lobster going to do?” said Encyclopedia.
“I wouldn’t know,” said Dave. “All Bugs did was talk. He said a hypnotized lobster could stand on its head while balancing a Ping-Pong ball on its tail.”
“And pass out business cards at the same time,” added Encyclopedia. “Oh, that Bugs!”
“I didn’t get to see one trick,” complained Dave. “Bugs said that my dollar paid only for a sample lesson. He told me I could start the course next week—for ten dollars.”
Dave laid twenty-five cents on the gasoline can beside Encyclopedia.
“I want to hire you to get back my dollar,” he said. “Bugs didn’t teach me enough to hypnotize an eggplant. All I got for my money is this.”
Bugs held up a large red lobster by the tail.
He handed Encyclopedia a color photograph. It showed Bugs and Dave standing together. Bugs held up a large red lobster by the tail with his left hand. He aimed the fingers of his right hand at it like a magician.
“Rocky Graham, one of the Tigers, snapped the picture with a self-developing camera,” said Dave. “Rocky told me to show it to my friends and tell them about the lessons.”
“What a gyp!” said Encyclopedia. “Let’s pay Bugs a visit.”
The Tigers’ clubhouse was an unused tool shed behind Mr. Sweeny’s Auto Body Shop. Bugs and two of his Tigers were still eating lobsters when Encyclopedia and Dave arrived.
“Make like a drum and beat it,” snarled Bugs.
“Give me back my dollar first,” blurted Dave. “When you took it, you didn’t tell me I’d need more than one lesson to hypnotize a lobster.”
“Man, oh, man!” exclaimed Bugs. “Nobody can learn overnight. It took me weeks.”
“You didn’t make that dumb old lobster do one trick,” said Dave.
“That’s because it was a girl lobster,” replied Bugs. “I told you, girl lobsters are hard for boys to hypnotize.”
Dave suddenly looked glum. “Yeah, I forgot ...”
“I’d like to see you make it do a trick for me,” put in Encyclopedia.
“Sorry,” said Bugs. “I ate it. In fact, me and the boys are eating the last of the catch right now.”
“You big goon!” cried Dave. “You ate the evidence on purpose! ”
“Never mind, Dave,” said Encyclopedia. “We have enough proof that Bugs cheated you.”
WHAT WAS THE PROOF?
 
 
 
 
 
(Turn to page 88 for the solution to The Case of the Hypnotism Lesson.)
The Case of the Parking Meters
Bugs Meany had one goal in life. It was to get even with Encyclopedia.
Bugs hated being outsmarted. He longed to pound the top of Encyclopedia’s head till the detective could pull up his socks by lifting his eyebrows.
But Bugs never used force. Whenever he felt like it, he thought twice about Encyclopedia’s partner, Sally Kimball. Once for each of her fists.
Sally was not only the prettiest girl in the fifth grade, but the best athlete. She could do what Bugs never dreamed possible. Flatten him.
Whenever they fought, the toughest Tiger ended on the ground mumbling about railroad crossings.
“Bugs won’t forgive you,” Encyclopedia warned Sally. “He’ll never live down the lickings you gave him.”
The two detectives were seated in the Brown garage. They were discussing the mysterious telephone call each had received during the week.
Monday a boy had called and asked Encyclopedia to meet him on important business at the Indian Burial Grounds at three o’clock that afternoon. The boy did not show up.
Yesterday Sally had received a call from a boy asking her to meet him at the old deserted airstrip at seven o’clock that evening. Like Encyclopedia, she had waited without seeing a soul.
“Bugs Meany is behind this,” said Sally. “It’s some kind of plot to get revenge.”
“Mr. Brains and Miss Muscles,” hollered Bugs.
Just then a police car stopped in the drive-way. Bugs and Officer Culp got out.
“There they are!” hollered Bugs. “Mr. Brains and Miss Muscles. Private detectives, my eyeball! They should be in jail!”
“What’s he shouting about?” asked Encyclopedia.
“Bugs claims that you go along the streets saving drivers from five-dollar parking fines,” said Officer Culp. “He says you put dimes in meters and leave a card like this.”
He gave Encyclopedia a card. It read:
Hi! You have just been saved from a $5 parking ticket by the Robin Hood parking aid. Your time on the meter had run out. Could you please send $2 so I may continue to bring you and others this service?
The card was signed “Robin Hood.” The address given was Encyclopedia’s home, 13 Rover Avenue, Idaville.
“He must be raking in money,” said Bugs. “I’ll bet he doesn’t report a cent of it to the government! ”
Officer Culp seemed uncomfortable. “I’m not sure if any law has been broken,” he said. “We’ll have to let a judge decide.”
“Man, oh, man!” exclaimed Bugs. “The son of our police chief dragged into court! What a disgrace!”

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