Ending with Forever (6 page)

“Wes, you look distracted. Do you know Carson Bradley?” she asks, snapping me out of my daze.

“Not personally, but I do know of him,” I reply vaguely, avoiding the dirty details that’s been eating at my conscience. “I spend most of my time in Hong Kong. My NeoMed Company is based there.”

“Are you a CEO of a medical company like your brother?” she inquires, surprised and impressed.

“Yes,” I answer modestly.

“When will you go back? Will I be able to see you again?” she panics.

“Yes, of course you’ll see me again. We have thirty-two years of catching up to do,” I assure her with a smart grin. There’s no way in hell I’ll lose her again now that I know she’s exactly how I imagined her—humble, tender, and loving. My tough decision is. Do I tell my father and Mimi about my birth mom?

“Oh, I’m so happy to hear that,” she rejoices.

“Mrs. Manns. I mean…
Mom
, I need to confirm something. Why do I have a scar on my right hip?” Bianca was oddly interested with my flaw which led me to believe that Carson has one also.

“You and your brother were joined at the hip, sharing a thin layer of skin. A high-risk neonatal surgeon was called in to separate that tissue. Your brother’s scar is on his left hip. Other than that minor imperfection, God had blessed me with two of the most beautiful, healthy babies. Instantly, I loved you both with all my heart. Handing you and your brother over to that agency was the most painful thing I ever had to do. I remember dripping tears over your faces as I gave each of you my last kisses. They had to pry you out of my arms. I cried my eyes shut for months, missing the three men in my life. There were days when I thought I had lost my mind.”

“I’m sure it must’ve been awful for you. Your selfless sacrifice has made us what we are today—powerful and successful. How many parents can brag about that? Not many. I respect you for what you did.”

“I hope your brother will feel the same way as you do.”

“He seems like a good man. I can’t imagine why he wouldn’t,” I assure her. “Do you plan on contacting him?”

“No, not unless he initiates it. I’d hate to disrupt his balanced life. From all the articles I’ve read about his family background, he credits his success to his loving and supportive parents. He’s at a happy place and that’s what matters most to me.”

“You must be the most amazing woman in the world,” I praise her with pride. Mimi could never be that noble. “I have to fly back to Boston tomorrow morning, but as soon as I figure things out, I’ll come see you again. That’s a promise.”

“I hope so. I want to introduce you to your half-brother and sister when you come back next time. Dillon is married with his first baby on the way and Danielle is starting her first year of residency at Johns Hopkins.”

Just this morning, I was an only child and now I have three siblings and will be an uncle to a new baby. I’ve never even held one in my arms before. This is a lot for my brain to wrap around. “I look forward to meeting everyone,” I tell her with one arm wrapped around her shoulders as we walk to the door. “I’ll call you soon. Take care,
Mom
.”

~~~~

I wasn’t sure what to expect when I flew here to meet my mother. For years, I fabricated this image of a perfect woman who was forced to give up her son for a worthy reason and not because she didn’t want or love me. Rejection is hard to accept no matter what age you are. I did what I had to do to get by. I’m pleased that my encounter with my mom went well. My new dilemma is how the fuck do I handle my father-brother situation? I didn’t foresee that coming. One thing’s for sure, I refuse to be involved with any plan that entails more kidnapping, especially of a young woman who happens to be my brother’s lover. To me, no amount of money is worth more than someone’s life. Why can’t my father see beyond the dollar sign? Greed has imprisoned his soul and impaired his judgment. I fear for his salvation.  

I’m taking the next available flight back to Boston instead of spending the night in Indianapolis. My father is hosting a dinner party tomorrow evening and has invited a handful of prominent business colleagues to attend. It’s an opportunity for the wealthiest of the wealthy to boast about their success and billions and pat themselves on their backs. Personally, I’ve never enjoyed attending these pretentious functions. However, I’m looking forward to this one. After years of snubbing my father’s invites, Marcus Ly is sending Bridgette in lieu of his presence. I don’t understand his change of heart nor do I give a shit. Bridgette is all I care about. Without the anxiety of her grandfather being near, I might have a slight chance of persuading her back into my bed. I’ve missed Bridgette. No other woman has been able to satisfy my untamable hunger for her. I’ve been wasting away, starving for her delicious scent and seductive body with skin, fair and smooth like fine crafted porcelain. I refuse to settle for anything less. There have been nights when I’d wake up with a painful erection from dreaming about fucking her senseless. I’d relieve myself by jacking off to nude pictures of her that were given to me as a birthday present. Tomorrow, I pray that she’ll give me at least a few hours to replenish my needs. Hell, I’d take a few minutes if she’d give me that.

A
t the bottom of the jet’s metal steps, Luke has a white cab waiting in the wings for us. I also see a new but familiar face staring at us while his eyes hide behind a pair of dark aviator glasses. Kevin. I remember him from my trip to Hong Kong. He still has the same blond strip down the center of his dark head of hair. His customary Tang suit is now replaced with street clothes, dark jeans and a hooded jacket.

“Good morning, Mr. Bradley,” he greets, his tone low and with a Hong Kong-British accent.

“Morning, Kevin,” I reply while Lil’s unforgiving eyes glare at him with iciness. It’s so unfriendly that I can almost feel the cutting chill. This is unusual behavior for her. She never fails to offer anyone her stunning smile. In fact, I credit her for being the reason I attempt to begin most encounters with a smile.

“Mr. Ly sent me here to be of any service to you and Miss Lucy,” he offers with a slight bow of the head, a sign of respect.

“Thank you, but I think we’ll be fine without you today. Why don’t you do some sightseeing while you’re here,” I suggest.

“But…,” he objects.

“It’s okay. I’ll contact you later this evening.”

“Yes, sir,” he complies and steps back into bodyguard formation.

Lil’s eyes remain callous as she walks past Kevin. I know where her animosity stems from and quite frankly, I don’t blame her. A few of Marcus Ly’s men didn’t receive her very kindly when she was in their company. Now she’s holding a grudge against all of them and rightfully, she should.

“Mr. Bradley, are you ready?” she asks, resuming her role as my assistant for Kevin’s sake.

“Yes, Miss Lucy,” I answer as a tiny smirk slithers across my face, remembering how much fun I had with her being my
assistant
last time.

The taxi pulls up in front of us and Luke jumps out from the backseat. “Mr. Bradley, protocol F1-V is in effect,” he informs, shifting Lil’s focus over to him. “Miss Lucy, your backpack is waiting for you in the cab.” From her twitchy posture and narrowing eyes, I can tell she doesn’t like the riddling codes Luke and I are passing back and forth. I’m surprise she’s not calling us out on it, demanding an explanation.

“Thanks,” she replies. 

I look into the cab and recognize the driver’s face. He’s one of the invisible bodyguards whom Lil has never seen and knows nothing about. Luke is proving to be a valuable asset to the BPC security team. A contract for a permanent position is due. I’ll have Owen draw it up when I get back. With him nearby, I know Lil will always be in good hands and out of harm’s way.

“I’m going to escort Lucy to her mother’s place and then meet you back at the house.”

Luke nods in agreement. He opens the passenger door for Lil to enter and I follow in behind her with my leather briefcase.

“How are your nerves now?” I ask as I settle in on my side and lower the briefcase down by my feet.

“Better. I think,” she replies. “Don’t worry about me. I’m just being dramatic like someone I know,” she kids with a cheeky grin.

Shaking my head, I tell her, “I’ve fired people for less, Miss Lucy. Behave. Why don’t you tell the driver where he should take us.”

“818 May Avenue, please,” she rattles off and then reaches for my left hand. “I’ll behave if that’s what you want, Mr. Bradley,” she whispers softly so the driver can’t hear her flirting. Her mood is all over the place today. It’s impossible for me to keep up with her.
And she thinks I’m fickle.

One thing’s for sure. I never let a trifling opportunity pass between us. Loosening my hand from her grip, I slide it between her thighs and murmur, “You know what I want, but you’re going to deprive me tonight.”

“Haven’t you had enough?”

“With you? Never.” She grins in response, knowing full well that I’m not exaggerating either.

“Carson, I need you to promise me something,” she urges, her tone serious, altering the playful mood of our exchange. I knew it. She was just buttering me up for bad news.

“What is it?” I ask, concerned.

“Promise me you won’t be upset with me after I tell you what it is.”

“I promise,” I snip, anxious to hear what she has to confess as I withdraw my hand from her thighs and crisscross my fingers together.

“You know how my mom thinks I’ve been living with Belle?” I nod. I’m getting the feeling I won’t like where this is going. “It’s because I haven’t been completely honest with you both. She thinks I’m back in med school with no distractions. She doesn’t know there’s an
us
,” Lil admits, dropping her eyes down to her twitchy hands.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I explode even though I just promised her I wouldn’t. She’s startled by my outburst, flinching from the loudness of my fuming voice. “Why, Lil? Am I not good enough for your mother? What am I doing here then?” I spit, feeling my temper soar out of control. After all I’ve done to prove my love for her, she still doubts me. My fingers clench into tight fists. What do I have to do to get through to her shielded heart?

“No. That’s not it. I hate to disappoint my mom,” she explains. “I hate it even more when she’s upset because of me.”

“Are you telling me I’m a disappointment for your mother?”

“No. You’re twisting my words,” she whimpers. “That isn’t what I meant at all.”

“Then explain it to me so I can understand it,” I demand as my chest expands and collapses with waves of anger.

“I’ve already told you. She doesn’t believe people like you can love anyone. They only love their money. Everyone around them is dispensable. It’s almost impossible to change her mind.”

“What do you believe?” I grit through my tightened jaw. I haven’t been this angry with her since I thought she was cheating on me with Richard. After everything we’ve been through, why can’t she fight for us? My response wounds her, causing her saddened eyes to plummet to her folded hands in contemplation. Her slumped expression tells me she feels awful. I know it’s not her intention to hurt me, but it still does. What the hell am I doing? Why am I putting her in a position where she has to choose between me and her mother? It’s unfair of me. Her mother was all she had before I came along.

Offering me peace, she wraps her arms around mine and leans her head gently into my shoulder. “I believe you love me and only me. I believe you’d give up anything, even your own life for me. I love you. I promise I’ll tell my mom everything when I see her. Please. Don’t hate me for lying to you.”

Her admission soothes my sulking instantly. I loosen my arm from her grip and enfold it around her shoulders, offering her my chest. Her cheek nuzzles against me, softening the tension around my neck. “Angel, I could never hate you. I love you insanely. You should know that by now. The only person I should have to convince is your mother.”

“She’s really tough.”

“I’m not one to give up easily, especially for something I really want,” I assure her and press my lips against her forehead.

~~~~

The undercover driver pulls into a modest home addition with cookie-cutter houses. Ranches and two-stories align the streets with minimal property in between. A few overzealous holiday fanatics already have their Christmas decorations up and it is only November. I’m probably categorized under holiday crank. I never paid much attention to decorating or presents. I had hoped and prayed that Emily would make it to her last Christmas so we could share her favorite holiday, but she didn’t. All the Christmases after that were miserable reminders for me of what holidays would be like without her. Presents? I’m generous all year long, so getting a gift from me for Christmas is just like any ordinary day. I perform my gracious role at my parents for dinner and then go home to an empty penthouse to begrudge the situation I’m in. Year after year, this became my holiday ritual and I eventually learned to accept it.

“We’re here, sir. 818 May Avenue,” the driver tells us.

Lil’s home is a taupe ranch with black window trim, a single car garage and wire fencing for privacy. Shrubs are kept pruned and neat. It must’ve snowed last night. There’s a light dusting on the black rooftop. Being here reminds me of the military homes we used to live in. They were functional and practical, nothing too fancy about them. However, I always felt a sense of comradery among the kids and families whose father or mother had the same ranking as mine.
So this is where my humble Lillian grew up
. Lil’s heart is beating even faster now that we’re parked in front of her house. I can feel the percussion of her pounding chest against my shoulder. Her palms are so clammy that the humidity is penetrating through my trousers. I’m almost positive her vomiting was due to her having to reveal me, her fiancé, to her mother.  

“Lil, we’re here,” I remind her. “What would you like to do?” I ask, hoping she’s changed her mind about me coming with her. I even brought my briefcase with the documents, just in case.

“I’d like to go in by myself,” she tells me in a dim voice. My shoulders drop along with any hope I had.

“Alright. Call me as soon as you can.” She nods in response and pulls her hoodie over her head. Tugging her back into my arms I whisper “I love you” and kiss her pursed lips which soften voluntarily against mine. She wants more and so do I, but she holds back out of discipline. I’m left with insecurity—something I haven’t allowed any woman to make me feel in a long time.

“I’ll call you,” she tells me as she steps out of the cab.

I release her hand and watch her linger nervously to the entrance of her house. She digs into her backpack for something, perhaps her keys which aren’t in there because she’s forgotten they’re in St. Croix. The front door opens before she finds them and a pair of welcoming arms reach out to embrace her, squeezing her tight, and stroking her head tenderly. I can’t see tears from where I’m sitting, but I’m damn sure they’re there. Knowing their story, this union is far more moving than I had pictured it to be. After nine months of separation and the recent news that her only child supposedly died in an accident, Lil’s mother is seeing her for the first time. I’m well aware of the magnitude of a mother’s love for her baby. I can’t imagine she’ll ever be able to let Lil go now that she has her safe in her arms again.

Lil’s mother bobs her head up to look at me in the cab. I don’t think she can make out who I am from the distance, but it appears as if she’s giving me a warning glare. It doesn’t intimidate me, but it does worry me that Lil might have a harder time opening up to her mother about me now that she’s face to face. For our sake, I hope my plan will work.

“Let’s head to the rental,” I tell the driver. “The other vehicle should be around the corner.”

“Yes, sir,” the driver replies before stepping on the pedal to go around a cul-de-sac to exit Lil’s street. My eyes never leave that taupe house even as we drive further and further away.

His eyes are locked on me, but I refuse to look back at the cab. It’s brutal enough to have to walk away from him as I hold back my emotions. I’m a coward. That’s me. I’ve failed to tell my mom about us when I had several opportunities to do so. Now I stand between him and my mother—two people I love with all my heart—being the reason we’re not together as a family. My lies continue as I slip off my engagement ring and tuck it into my jean pocket.
Carson, please forgive me. I know I’d promised you I’d never take it off for any reason. It’s just temporary.
The sizable pink diamond is hard to miss, especially for an overly observant mother like mine.

I’m finally at the front door, but I wasn’t smart enough to dig out my keys before I headed into the cold. As I try to unzip the first pocket of my backpack with my trembling hands, I realize my keys are in St. Croix. I’m thankful when the door opens and my mom’s arms reach out to me. Her endearing eyes are already welled up with tears as she gazes at me like I’m an apparition. She pats my head and body to make sure that I’m real before pressing me into her chest and holding me with all her might.

“Mom, I’ve missed you,” I sob over her shoulders as my arms squeeze her even tighter yet. The unforgettable feel and scent of my mom encourages tears to stream without end. 

“Lily, you’re really okay. I was so worried about you,” she cries. Her brittle voice is agonizing to my ears and heart. What kind of an inconsiderate person puts her mother through that kind of hell? Me. I’m that horrible person. I’m positive she’s had countless, sleepless nights because of me. She doesn’t deserve that, and I don’t deserve her.

“I’m sorry,” I falter as burning tears become icicles, trickling down my face like strands of glistening diamonds. It must be less than zero degrees out here. My goosebumps are growing in size and number while my breath is captured in air as frozen sheets of mist with every exhale.

“Come in. You’ll freeze to death,” mom tells me with her arms around my shoulders. I enter first, still fighting the urge to look back at Carson. I can’t imagine how hurt he must be feeling right now. My gut is twisted in painful knots knowing that I’m the cause of his distress. I swear I’ll make it up to him somehow.

“Who’s that in the taxi?” she asks, giving Carson one good look before closing the door.

“I met him at the airport. He was heading in the same direction so we shared a cab to save money,” I lie. “Belle and I do that all the time in Boston,” I add while bending down to remove my high heel boots and then set them neatly on a shoe mat. Her peering eyes are asking me how I can afford them as they target the boots’ expensive appearance. “They’re part of Belle’s many hand-me-downs,” I explain before she grills me. “Models get lots of freebies.”