Everything But (34 page)

Jesus…with Riley’s lifestyle, visiting her parents would be no problem.  He wasn’t rich by any stretch of the imagination
,
but he had plenty of money.  And the plan was to become disgustingly rich with this new musical venture. 
Yeah, if he invested wisely now, he could probably live off what he’d already made and do okay for the rest of his life, but if his new band accomplished what he hoped, he’d never want for anything
ever
.

And here he was thinking about how that could help Erin.

Fuck
…he really
was
hooked.

Chapter Thirty-five

ERIN FELT A
little relief when Riley took his first bite of the pasta and his eyes lit up.  She didn’t know what his tastes were like, and the pasta dish was something simple she made for herself when she was feeling lazy but wanted some kind of comfort food. 
W
hile she was throwing the food together, she had Riley put some music in her CD player to keep him busy
, because having him watch her so closely made her a little nervous
. 
She stirred the butter sauce over the cooked drained pasta and then sprinkled Parmesan cheese on top.  She poured the whole pot into a large glass bowl and grabbed two forks
and napkins
.  Then she asked Riley to pour her a glass of water and bring his and her glasses to the bedroom.

She heard him following her.  “Where are we going?”

She couldn’t help giggling.  “We’re going to have a picnic in my bedroom.”

“A picnic?”

“Why not?”

He didn’t have an argument for her and instead just followed behind her.  When she got to the bedroom, she sat up on the bed and then sat cross legged.  Riley joined her. 
He asked,
“Do you want your water?”

“Not right now.  Can you just set it on the nightstand?”

“Yep.”
  He placed both their glasses there and just looked at her.

She handed him a fork
as he sat on the bed
.  “Dig in.”

“Community bowl?”

She shrugged and grinned.  “I figured your tongue’s already been in my mouth…and all over my body…”  She felt her cheeks grow warm but pushed on anyway.  “So why not?”

He licked his lips.  God, he was sexy when he did that.  “Well, how can I turn that down?”
  Then he took his first bite and said, “Holy shit.  That’s good stuff.”

“Told you.”
 
Relief.
 
She speared a bowtie.  “
And t
hanks for your help.”

“I’ll send you my bill.”

She smiled at him, swallowing another bite.  She hadn’t realized she was so hungry until she’d started eating.  But
it dawned on her that
she hadn’t eaten much for lunch and her sexual appetite had masked her hunger.  Now that that had been quelled for a time, her stomach was thanking her for the food.  But she wanted to talk, so she didn’t plan on wolfing down the
pasta
.

“So tell me about your parents…you know, from your point of view.”  She didn’t dare tell Riley what she thought of them personally.  His mom could be a bit of a bitch on occasion and she was pushy.  Erin had had to stand up to the woman a year ago because she’d
wanted to have her seniors in H
onors English read Toni Morrison’s
Beloved
.  Fortunately, the principal had back
ed
her
,
and other board members understood Erin’s rationale.
  One thing Erin would give Marjorie
Schultz credit for, though, was that the woman managed to maintain her civility toward Erin…meaning she was just as cold as she’d
ever
been.  She hadn’t grown worse. 
But Riley’s
dad?
  She knew nothing about him except for what she’d heard.  His family wasn’t rich, but they were certainly upper middle class, and their name was known in Winchester.
  Erin wondered how the hell Riley came out of that family—he
seemed
so
different…at least from what she could tell.

“Aw, you don’t really want to know about them.”  And maybe he felt the same way
about them that she did
.

But she wasn’t going to let him off the hook that easily.  “Yeah, I do, actually.”  She grabbed her glass of water and took a sip.  “Were you adopted too?”

Riley chuckled and nodded his head.  “
Is it t
hat apparent?”  He shook his head. 
“Nah…just the
stereotypical
black sheep.
  Every family’s
gotta
have one, right?”

“Yeah, but you get along with them okay, don’t you?”

“Only ‘
cause
I live several states away.”

“Really?
  Is it
that
bad?”

Riley’s eyes were intense and the way he looked almost took her breath away.  But she
’d already
sensed there was a sensitive core, something there she’d never seen.  He wore his bad boy rock star persona like a bulletproof vest, but she could tell he was close to diving deep.  She decided to stay quiet now.  She had been teasing him, but now she
could tell
there was something here he wasn’t comfortable with, so she wasn’t going to push it.
  He said, “Let’s just say the little kid in me has vied for their approval his whole life
,
but there’s a part of me that doesn’t give a shit anymore.”
  Erin slowly brought another forkful of pasta to her mouth, staying
silent
.  He was looking down at his hands.  Then he shook his head.  “But you know what?  We’re not going to talk about depressing shit right now.”

Erin shrugged.  “Sorry.”

He sighed.  “No, you asked.  And I’m being kind of a shit avoiding your question.”  He took a deep breath.  “My brother…he’s the one who makes mom and dad proud.  He went to
the
School of Mines
,
and he’s some kind of petroleum engineer. 
Lives in Texas right now.
 
Filthy rich.
  Well respected.  Wears fucking suits and ties all the time.  Has a sweet Southern belle wife, a dog, two sons and a daughter, a nanny…a perfect life. 
He
is the son my mom and dad wanted.  I…well, I’m the one they try to pretend doesn’t exist.
  They wanted a carbon copy of Brian and instead they got the photo negative.
”

Holy shit.
  The pain was raw.  How many people had Riley ever told that to?  Erin could see the hurt in his eyes and
she was overwhelmed by the intensity.  Had he ever told his parents how badly they’d hurt him by not
just
loving and accepting him?  But then she thought of Marjorie Schultz.  Would Erin be able to tell the woman something emotional like that?  Hell, no, and Erin wasn’t even invested enough to have to protect her heart like Riley was.  It made her want to bury him in her arms and
shower
him with love, but she suspected that was the last reaction he wanted.  Should she say anything or just keep her mouth shut?  But she couldn’t hold her tongue.  Her voice was quieter than she expected when she said, “How could they not be proud of you too?”

Riley’s eyes finally met hers, but she could tell he was pulling himself up out of his abyss.  He looked like he regretted saying what he had already.  He smiled and stabbed a piece of pasta.  “Wait till you meet good
ol
’ mom and dad
for
reals
.  Then you’ll understand.  G
uess I should jus
t be happy they haven’t disowned me.”

Erin rested her fork against the inside of the bowl and
then placed
her hand on his knee.  “You know what?  Maybe they aren’t into your music and maybe they wish you’d done something else, but I bet anything part of them is secretly proud of you.”  He furrowed his brow and she shook her head. 
“Seriously, Riley.
  You
are
their son and how many people around the world worship you?”

He moved his head from side to side in disagreement
.  “That doesn’t mean shit to them.  Trust me.”

She noticed she’d been rubbing his knee.  “Well, they’re crazy then.  If you were
my
son, I’d be crazy proud of you.”

He chuckled and squeezed her hand.  “If I were your
son,
that
would be inappropriate.”
  It took her a moment to understand he was talking about her hand’s placement, not her words.

She started laughing.  “Not necessarily.”

“Yeah, it would, ‘
cause
it’s a turn on.”  Erin was glad he wasn’t drowning in his sorrow anymore.  Part of her felt bad that she’d said anything
but she was also glad he’d trusted her enough to share his pain with her. 
She laughed and took her hand back and grabbed her fork, even though her appetite had dissipated.  “So tell me about this best friend of yours…the one you’ve been friends with since…what’d you say? 
Third grade?”

“Oh.  That’d be Jackie.  She
is
my best friend.  In fact, I t
hink she’s my only friend. 
But
yeah.
  We even went to college together.  We both wanted to teach high school—how weird is that?  So we both went to Western State…she majored in math and I majored in English
,
but we both got the secondary education licensure.  Between our core classes and the classes we needed for education, we wound up being able to take
lots of
classes together.  We were roommates the whole time too.  Another guy from Winchester was going to school there
,
and they started dating her junior year.  He graduated
at the end of
that year but hung aroun
d Gunnison because of her.  We all
moved back here to Winchester after she and I graduated and then
they
got married.
  I was their roommate for a few months until I could find my own place.  In fact, after that first place, this is the only other place I’ve rented.   Anyway, right now Jackie and Carl are focused on making their first baby.”

“So…she’s your best friend but a little preoccupied all the time?”

“Oh, no.
  She’s there for me.  I forgot to tell you…we work together too.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, so during the school year, I see her almost every day.”

“That’s not weird or anything.”

Erin put her fork down.  “You think that’s weird?”

Riley shrugged.  “Oh, what the fuck do
I
know about friendships?  I don’t have a best friend
,
and I hardly even have guys I’d call friends.”

Erin felt like the tines of the fork she’d set down had just pierced her heart
…or
his
.
  “You don’t have
any
friends?”

His visage changed.   He looked guarded, as though he’d said too much.  But he answered her.  “It’s
kinda
hard now.  I mean…someone gets
chummy,
the first thing I wonder is what they want.  It’s because of my position.  I’ve had too many people want to be supposed friends just because of what I do.  They don’t give a shit about the real me.”

Erin was looking at his knee that she’d been stroking a few minutes earlier.
  Her voice was quiet
again
when she said, “What must you think about me?”

He grabbed the bowl and set it aside on the bed, then took her face in his hands. 
“Oh, God,
no
, Erin.
 
No
. 
I didn’t explain myself very well.”  He sighed, but she could see the sincerity in his eyes.  “You never threw yourself at me.”  Ah, she wondered, but
would
she have had he not made the first move?
  “And I know your intentions were never devious or…or…manipulative or thieving…”

She
dug deep and
knew
he was right
.  As much as she’d idolized him, it hadn’t taken long for her to realize Riley was a real person.  And she cared about him that way.
  She no longer thought about him as someone out of reach, a celebrity she’d never know and could only read about.  No, Riley was genuine, and when she really thought about it, her feelings had moved a notch deeper somehow over the course of the conversation and she cared even more than she
would have imagined.  But she just nodded and said nothing.  Instead, she maintained her gaze and closed her eyes when he kissed her.