Everything I've Never Had (52 page)

Poor thing. She looks mortified. She’s so fucking innocent. This thought troubles me because it means that I’ll have to play protector while she finds herself a new man. “So, we're good then. No, uh, awkwardness?” I’ve turned into a stumbling fool over her.
Fanfuckingtastic.
For years, I’ve been controlling this, and now it’s all out there for her to see.

“Of course. I'm not one of your simpering groupies. I promise not to stalk you and demand any more kisses,” she says and a blush immediately consumes her precious face. I’m dumbfounded. Did she really just compare herself to a bunch of barflies?

I can’t help but to reach out for her and try to show her how much more than that she is, how much more she means to me. She doesn’t jump from my touch, but she might as well have for the way her shifting away has me reeling. It’s worse than I thought. She’s going to hate me. I’m screwed.

I put my hands in my back pockets to keep from trying to touch her again and rock back on my heels, shooting for nonchalance, when all I feel is sheer panic. “You ready to come back inside then?”
Come let me play you a kickass song and get this bad memory out of your head
.

“Umm...I just need another minute. I'll be right in, OK?” she says with a small smile. That’s better.

“OK,” I agree. I turn to go, but then wonder if she just doesn’t want to be around me. Damn. I turn back and confirm, “See ya inside.”

“Yep,” she agrees.

Making my way back inside, I grab a beer and head up to the stage even though we have a few minutes. I need to clear my head, and I don’t feel like having some random girl shoving her tits in my face while I do.

How many times have I imagined that kiss? I don’t even know, but I do know it was beautiful and perfect. She is beautiful and perfect. I’d give anything if…
nah, man, don’t set yourself up for that.

I’m going to have to talk to her tonight. I can’t let her stew. Damn, it’s not my week to cut grass and the boys are in the country. What do I do? Just show up there groveling like a little bitch? Yeah, I’d grovel for her.
Ain’t too proud to beg.

I lick my lips before I take a swig of my beer and taste her again. So fucking sweet. Taking a pull from my beer, I look out over the crowd and realize she still hadn’t come back in unless she was in the bathroom. I spot Bonnie and Farah. Don’t girls usually do that shit together? Farah’s got her back to me. And Bonnie’s ogling Garner, so it takes me a second to get her attention. I motion to her with my finger. She scrunches her face up at me before coming over.

“Geez, Adrian, you’ve pulled me away from one hot piece of man.” She turns and looks back to see some blonde bimbo sidling up to Garner. She lets out a hiss. “This better be earth shattering, or I’ll be forced to castrate your fine self,” she grumbles as she turns back to me.

Oh, it’s earth shattering all right. I ignore her little threat. “Where’s Cel? Bathroom?”

Her brow furrows and she shakes her head at me. “Oh, no. She just shot me a text, saying she was grabbing a cab. Isn’t that strange? I tried to catch her, but she was long gone. Sent her another text, and she said she’s fine,” Bonnie says with a shrug. “Just wanted to get home.”

I drop my head, shaking it. It’s worse than I thought. She can’t even stand to be around me. “I should've fucking known better,” I mutter before turning back to get ready for our second set.

To my soul mate best friend, Bobbie Myers, yes you are first again. How could you not be when you spend countless hours on the phone, online, and travelling with me in order to help me achieve my dream? Not to mention reading my manuscript eight times over and analyzing one sentence with me for God only knows how long? I know you do it because you love me and you believe in my work, but know that the blessing of you is beyond appreciated. I’m so grateful that you spoke to me that day in the bleachers of our sons’ baseball tryouts even though I was praying that no one would because I was on death’s door and didn’t have the energy to put any make-up on. I love you to pieces.

To
my
everything, my husband…you believe in what I have to offer this world and support me in every way possible. I am ever so grateful. And how awesome is that my husband follows book blogs now so that he can keep abreast of all the latest happenings? Love that man!

Thank you to my children for not guilting me too much when I went AWOL while finishing this book. Your support and love mean the world to me, Austin and Nolan. I hope you are as proud of me as I am of you.

My entire family has been incredibly supportive of me. I wish I could name them all here, but I have to say that my mom, Marie McAdams, is beyond amazing, and I am so grateful that she used to drop me off at the library on Saturdays rather than making me run errands with her. To my aunts—Velina, Sandra, and Iva—you are such strong women from whom I am constantly learning, and I love you all so much. Thank y’all for making my first book signing a success!

Thank you, Amanda Conine, for gifting me the name Archer. I’ll never forget the day while we were in between class periods and you were talking with your mouth full and mumbled your husband’s name. I said that’s a cool name—Archer—and you remarked, “Yeah, it is cool but I said Richard.” Priceless!

Thank you to a great friend, a huge supporter, and excellent New Orleans fact checker, Tammy Vizzini. Let’s go have that Goody now!

Liz Murach from Sinfully Sexy Book Reviews, I cannot thank you enough for listening to me ramble about how much I love the Foo Fighters, sharing in that obsession, and researching and sending me the links to get permission to use their lyrics for “Everlong.” Those lyrics are Celeste and Adrian’s love story set to music, so they are priceless.

To my awesome beta readers—Megan, Elle, Debi, and Stephanie—thank you so much for the invaluable feedback and falling in love with my story and my characters. Your insights and hilarious comments made revising a blast!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again—my Dragonfly Divas rock! I’m so grateful that you love Every Rose enough to tell others and help me spread the word. I couldn’t do this self-pub thing without you.

I have so many writers whom I adore and who inspire me, and I love being a part of our writing group, Indie Gals. Those who support me to the ends of the earth, I have to say thank you so much. Wendy Ferraro, Mel Bellew, Kimi Flores, Melanie Dawn, T.L. Manning, Chelsea Camaron, Liz Upton, Scarlett Metal, LK Collins, L. Chapman, and Beth Michele—I love you all so very much.

Without you, my readers, my book would just be a thing and not the living, breathing organism that you make it when you love, connect, remember, and share it. Thank you.

Book bloggers—without them this indie thing would be so much more difficult and not near as much fun. I have so many bloggers who love and support my work, but a few in particular really “get” my books and me and go above and beyond in promoting them.

Kristy Louise from Book Addict Mumma, your love and support mean the world to me. You were one of my first ever readers, and I’ve been so happy to share my journey with you. Thank you for the book trailers!

Stephanie Oursler from the Boyfriend Bookmark, I don’t think I’ve ever had to ask you share a single thing for me. Your love and enthusiasm for
Every Rose
is unparalleled, and I’m so grateful. And you are so genuine that it makes my heart hurt.

Angie McKeon from Angie’s Dreamy Reads, thank you so much for organizing my blog tour for EINH and for championing this book. I’ve loved your blog from the start because of your passion for books and their authors and your ability to engage readers, so I am thrilled that you decided to take me under your wing.

Maureen Sytsma from the Scarlet Siren, boy I am glad you liked my
Every Rose
reader beware statement! Your twisted sense of humor and eagerness to make graphics for me are beyond appreciated. You are one talented and ridiculously beautiful woman!

Stacy Nickelson from It All Started with a Book Blog, I’m so grateful that you found
Every Rose
and connected with it on a fundamental level. I don’t know what I’d do without you. You are a class act.

Chris Carmilia from Chris’ Blog Emporium, thank goodness for Goodreads and your gorgeous review of
Connected
. We bonded over that, and I hope it’s a bond that never breaks.

To my favorite lovers—Natalie, Dina, Meagan, and Jennifer— at Love Between the Sheets, thank you for loving my books and me. Y’all are the most genuine group of girls I’ve ever had the pleasure of fangirling with!

Ava from Book Nerds Anonymous, thank you so much for your love and support and for sharing your story with me.

Laura Voss from Stephanie’s Book Reports, your love and support has been unwavering. Thank you for falling in love with Michael and wanting to see his success as much as I do.

Thank you to all the bloggers who took a chance on me, joined my blog tour, or promoted my books—Crystal’s Many Reviews, Booky Ramblings, Sweet Sassy Sexy Book Blog, Book 2 Book, Beauty Brains and Books, Hooked on Books, First Class Books, Sparkling Pink Bookshelf, The Rookie Romance Blog, Musings of a Misfit, Mary Elizabeth's Crazy Book Obsession, Kiss And Tell Reviews, #BookNerd, Escape Into A Book, Bridger Bitches Book Blog, The Blushing Reader, Reviews by Tammy and Kim, Curious Kindle Reader, Swoon Worthy Books, Love Between the Sheets, Group Therapy Book Club Blog & Review, Kassie's Book Thoughts, Smokin' Hot Book Blog, Mean Girls Luv Books, Whirlwindbooks, Fiction's Our Addiction, G & C Book Blog, For the Love of Books, Read and Share Book Reviews, The Autumn Review, True Story Book Blog, PEACE LOVE BOOKS, Three Girls and a Book Obsession, Reading is My Time Out, Books Coffee and Wine, My Secret Romance Book Reviews, The Book Enthusiast, Maria's Book Blog, Chapter Break, Bookaholics Blog, Thoughts and Reviews, The Book Avenue, Mackable Book Babes, Stories and Swag, Sofia loves books, I'll Be Reading, Love Words And Books, Read More Sleep Less, Morning After a Good Book, Rude Girl Book Blog, Tabby’s Tantalizing Reviews, I <3 Books, Flirty and Dirty Book Blog, Totally Booked, and Maryse’s Book Blog.

For as long as she can remember, Lynetta Halat has lived to read and has written countless stories and plays since she was a young girl. An avid reader, she’d has always dreamt of penning books that people could connect with and remember; and her first novel,
Every Rose
, was the perfect catalyst to launch her into the world of publishing, and now she has followed that up with an adult romance in
Everything I’ve Never Had
. Her love of the English language prompted her to pursue a master's degree in English from Old Dominion University in Virginia. A self-proclaimed “Coast Girl,” she lives in Mississippi with her adorable husband, two amazing sons, and two loveable dogs. She is currently at work on third book.

For more information about Lynetta and her books, visit:

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