Everything She Needs (The Everything Trilogy) (9 page)

I watched as he walked to the bar, and felt slightly shaky at the effect he still had on me.  Just seeing his smooth movements and that damned sexy walk of his made me weak at the knees.  His ass
was just so perfect in his low rise dark blue jeans.

The studded belt, although kind of cliché on a rock star, still managed to make me want to whip it through the belt loops and toss it aside on the way to pee
ling those jeans down his legs.

I smiled
and realized that even though we were here, and I was hearing him give me some less than happy, honest truths, I was still fantasizing about getting him naked.

“Hey, have I ever told you how beautiful your smile is?” I
realized that he had been watching me from the bar and had made his way back.  Yet, I was too busy, lost in my daydream to notice.

“Do we have to name it?” I found myself saying.

Alfie’s brows furrowed. “Name it?”  My eyes rolled up as I thought about what I was about to say and mentally chastised myself before the words were even out.

“This…
thing.” I wagged my finger between the two of us. “I’m not sure what I’m saying.”

He moved closer, sitting
on the stool next to me. His hand swept past my face and gripped my hair lightly at the nape of my neck, as his eyes grew hooded and intense as they stared into mine.

“Try! Tell me what you want to say.” He held my gaze, and the touch of his hand on my neck sent a familiar current of electricity through me.  I shuddered involuntarily
, and he smiled slowly at my reaction.

I could see the effect I had on him when his hand touched me as well. His eyes had gone dark and were like a window to his soul, changing
colors and reacting to his moods. Right now, they were mainly green, as well as being seductive and smoky.

I shrugged. “You’re here, and I’m here
. I guess we mean enough to each other that we’ve spent so much time trying to label this ‘thing’ between us.” I pointed my finger and wagged it between us again.

He dipped his head and rested his forehead on mine. “Damn straight, I can admit to that.” His words, as little as they were, felt like a glimmer of hope to me.

The knowledge that he felt something for me gave me something to work with. The problem with that being that I risked falling deeper in love with someone I couldn’t have.

I inhaled his scent.  He smelled of
bodywash, Jack Daniel’s, and him, and being this close to him, if I turned my face just slightly our lips would touch. I stayed perfectly still. “So what do you want, Alfie?  What do you want from me?”

He stared into my eyes
, and I was transfixed, my question echoing back at me.  He moved his nose to brush mine before putting his lips to my ear.

Before I could think about it, he whispered, “Time, I want time with you. Today, t
omorrow…we need time together.”

I wanted that too, what if we never got this time again? What if I didn’t take the opportunity to have some unhurried time, without schedules and commitments and other people interrupting us?  Maybe
I would learn more about him.

Maybe, just maybe, I would begin to see his flaws and instead of
seeing him as being unobtainable, I would see him as just a guy that I could live without.

Or maybe spending time with me would make him feel more for me. Could I risk spending time with him? At least I was
in my home territory. I decided that it was a risk worth taking.

“What’s your schedule?
”

He leaned back to focus better on me
. “I have rehearsals, two to five pm daily, all afternoon from midday on New Year’s Eve until five pm, then showtime at seven pm until eight thirty pm. We don’t have to tear down. It’s a big gig, so there are a guitar technicians and roadies to pack up for us. We head out on the third  back to the USA. So I have, what… two days off after for sightseeing, or partying… whatever.”

I looked at my wrist watch.  It was
almost one o’clock in the afternoon. “Where is the gig going to be?” Alfie smiled his eyes wide.

“The O2 arena, you know it?” I was impressed
.

“Seriously?”
He nodded. Crakt Soundzz was certainly raising their profile if they were supporting at that venue.

Most world
-class artists performed there. “Okay, you better get a move on if you’re going to make those rehearsals.”  He checked the time on his smart phone and nodded in agreement.

Alfie’s eyes dropped
, and he lifted his glass.  He placed the rim to his lips and swiftly threw back the remaining Jack Daniel’s left in it. My mind was in conflict that he would be gone any minute, and I wanted to see him again. “I’ll meet you at the Cutty Sark at seven pm.”

Alfie placed his wide stumpy glass on the beer mat, and his eyes flicked back up to my face. “W
hat’s that?” he looked puzzled.

“It’s on the river near the O2 venue. You know Greenwich is by the river, right? It’s an original clipper ship that’s moored there… it’s a tourist attraction, you can’t miss it. Find it and you can take me to dinner.” Alfie’s mouth spread in a wide grin.

“Don’t!” I put my hand up with my palm facing his chest as a warning. “I’m making a concession here.  Don’t let me down, Alfie.”

He nodded
. “Thank you, Lily. I promise you won’t regret it.”

Alfie stood holding the door open
for me to leave the pub ahead of him.  I walked with him towards Sloan Square Tube station.

“Can I ask something?  Well
… it’s more of a request really?” He flicked his eyes quickly to meet mine as we walked along the road awkwardly avoiding contact with each other.

“Sure
,” I said, trying to sound lighthearted.

“W
ill you wear exactly what you’re wearing right now to dinner tonight?  I haven’t really been able to enjoy how you look with our heavy conversation today.”

I chuckled
, and he grinned, his dimple showing for the first time today. “Really, you want me to wear this old thing?” I tried to downplay my earlier effort to look great.

I snickered when he looked away for a second to cross a road, feeling del
ighted that he commented on it.

He turned his head back when we were safely on the sidewalk
, and his hungry eyes glanced very slowly down the length of me. “Lily, I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything more perfect on you, and you know how I feel about your choices of attire. You’ve got great taste, but this…” He tugged lightly at the material near my waist.

“
Dayum! The color, the cut, the slit at your thigh. Jesus, Lily, you kill me. Every time I think you definitely can’t top the outfit you’re wearing, you do exactly that.”

I smiled a little, but his gaze was full of arousal and was becoming intense. It was a look that was dangerous for me.  I could get lost in it, and I
forced myself to look away from him.

I was glad that he could still manage to appreciate me wh
ile I was fully clothed, and he hadn’t been trying to seduce me earlier. His head turned to me, a smile playing on his lips, but he wasn’t being cocky. This wasn’t the Alfie that played with my feelings. I liked this one much better.

We arrived at the tube station
, and Alfie awkwardly pulled me in for a hug.  Well, it started out as a friendly goodbye hug, but he couldn’t quite let me go and his arms tightened just as I was about to pull back.  His face nestled in my hair, and he inhaled sharply. “God, Lily, I’ve never held a woman that fit in my arms so perfectly and smelled as good as you…ever.”

I pulled back then, and gave him a half smile, but didn’t comment.  I let my arms go loose
, and he had no choice but to do the same.  I knew I had to manage this thing between us, and I couldn’t afford to be lax about the effect he always had on me, or I would be miserable again in no time.

His handsome face looked pained to be leaving me
, and he turned to walk away.  I stood watching him.  His head turned back in my direction; there was a vulnerability to him as his eyes locked with mine again. “Seven pm… Cutty Sark.”

I nodded, and the bustle of the crowd entering and leaving the station swallowed him from my view. I rang Jack. “You took your time, everything okay, honey?”
He sounded concerned.  I told him that I was fine and that my talk with Alfie went better than I expected.

“I got a few answers to some things that were real issues for me.” Jack was crunchi
ng noisily down the line at me.

“Jack, what are you doing?” He chuckled
.

“What can I say, I was bored. I hope Roslyn wasn’t
going to do anything special with that smoked salmon and cream cheese in the fridge cuz it’s gone now, but there are a few crackers left.” I giggled.

“Jack, you’re a Gannet, and we were supposed to h
ave the lasagne my mother made.” 

“We are… it’s in the oven.  Do you want me t
o put the garlic bread in now?” By the time we finished our conversation, I had walked home. He was standing in the opened doorway, both of us still talking on our cell phones to each other.

“So you’re just going to put your heart out there for this guy to kick all over the street again?” Jack had served lunch for us both and was putting the remainder of the lasagne in a plastic box to take home for later, whilst he was talking to me.

It was obvious, from his flared nostrils and the large ‘O’ his mouth made, that he thought I had taken leave of my senses agreeing to meet Alfie.

I gave him a wry smile. “I know, but this was my choice, Jack. He didn’t
pressure me at all. I want to do this. I thought I owed it to myself to spend some time with him away from Miami. I want to see what happens when he isn’t distracted by life at home, gigging, working, partying or our friends.” Jack stuffed some lasagne in his mouth and took a swig of Merlot wine, swallowed, and licked his lips, before arguing back.

“I’ll tell you what will happen, Lily.” He paused, waving some garlic bread at me before crunching loudly on it and continuing to mumble through it. “He’ll promise you the world, fuck you senseless
, and leave you crying in your milk.”

He picked up his large wine glass
and saluted me, before taking another large gulp of the red wine. He placed it quietly back on the table, and his eyes made contact with mine again. His gaze was serious.  All the usual humor that I knew him for was gone.  I knew he was worried about me.

Sighing, I reached over and touched Jack’s hand.  He was my friend and didn’t want to see me hurt.  Hell, I didn’t want to see me hurt. “Maybe…but at least I’ll know for sure
that we’re not supposed to be together. Right now, Jack, I can’t help thinking he could have been the one.”

I could see that Jack wanted to argue, but he knew when to keep his thoughts to himself.  He respected that I would do what I wanted anyway, and that he would be the perfect friend and come to my rescue when I needed it.

The roles had been reversed with us so many times before, when Jack fell in love, or found someone better.  Mostly, when he felt too close and got cold feet and couldn’t stick it out.

“You’ll call me?  Why don’t you meet with us later at the club tonight? David, Emma, Sam
, and I are going. We’re meeting Elle there after work.  You would have safety in numbers.  It allows you to have some quiet time over dinner and the support of your friends later on.”

It was a great suggestion.  I agreed it would be after dinner, I might have become unstuck with Alfie’s advances. “Okay, that’s an excellent plan, Jack, we’ll see you later.
Give me a text when you get there, and leave our names at the door.  I’ll either come with him or come alone.  After all, the more time I have with you, the better.”

Jack left after making a considerable
dent in my parents’ perishable foods; the plastic, seal fresh box with the remaining lasagne in it was tucked under his arm.

He kissed my cheek
, and I suggested he might want to buy some mouthwash.  He smelled like an advert for French or Italian food with all the garlic he had consumed today.

I went into the bathroom and slipped out of my dress, then indulged myself
in a long soak using one of the wonderful bubble bath oils that Elle had bought me for Christmas.

I lay there trying not to think about what the evening would bring, instead focusing on how I could head off any advances Alfie m
ight make.  I needed boundaries, and I would make these clear before the evening started.

I left home at 6pm, taking a cab over to Greenwich.  It was a white frosty evening, and I had borrowed a thick, black faux fur coat of my mother’s.  I was lucky my mother was only forty
-three and still fashion conscious.

It was dark when I arrived and walked gingerly down the pathway towards our meeting point.  My eyes scanned over the area
, and my breath hitched when I saw him walking towards where I had said I would be.