Evil (9 page)

I narrowed my eyes. “Again. What are you talking about?”

“You don’t look the same. Your new revelations tonight changed you. They’ll notice. They’ll want to know why.”

And therein lays the problem. Gus and Vespar couldn’t know, but know what? “They can’t know I’m not a demon? Because they wouldn’t be able to handle that, would they?”

Kellan chose his words carefully. “They’re already on edge. You saw that this morning. They’re scared that you might alert people about us.”

“Like messengers?”

“Or others.”

He was being evasive again. It was starting to piss me off. “Why can’t you just tell me what the problem is? What are you hiding from me?”

“Are those your last two questions?” He grinned and then saw he shouldn’t have joked. “Relax. Sorry. They’re not as powerful as you or me. They have good reason for being scared. There are beings more powerful than them around. They could come here, and Gus and Vespar might not hold up against them very well.”

“They’re scared of being killed?”

“Or tortured. Witches, anyone who knows demon lore, knows our laws and how to get around them could hurt us. Some people enjoy hurting a demon. They think they can because we’re essentially dark and evil.”

“You guys are evil.”

Kellan’s jaw clenched, and his knuckles tightened on the steering wheel. “Regardless, our brother and sister don’t deserve to be tortured for fun. No one deserves that.”

“Isn’t that what you do?”

He didn’t respond, and the tension was suddenly thick in the air. His anger boiled. I felt it snap at me. And I knew the demon wanted to harm me, but Kellan fought it back. We kept driving, and he still hadn’t replied until we got to our driveway. When he did comment, it wasn’t about that. “You can’t say anything to them about tonight. Matt. Your visitor tonight. Your paintings. None of it. Nothing.”

“They can’t know about Matt?”

“No, you’re right. We dealt with Matt tonight. They’ll know that he’s been altered. They’ll want to know why. We’ll tell them the truth about that.”

As we drove around the house and parked in front of the garage, I asked, “What about Leah tonight?”

“What about her?” Kellan turned off the car and glanced toward the house. All the windows were dark, but we both knew our siblings were up. In fact, I knew they were watching. Gus stood in front of the living room window, and Vespar was framed by his bedroom window on the second floor. Both watched with somber expressions.

“What happened to her?” I asked him the question, but I saw the answer was with our other siblings. Blood. I felt it dripping from their hands. Of course, I couldn’t see it, but I sensed it. It was there, and it had changed them. Somehow.

“Leah will be fine,” Kellan said shortly and got out of the car.

“They killed her father, didn’t they?” Who else knew? How could this be covered up?

“Stepfather,” he corrected me, walking in front of me to the door.

My feet stopped in their place. Kellan knew they had killed him. He probably knew their intent in the first place, where they were headed once they left that afternoon. I saw that he didn’t condone it. In fact, he approved. Then my eyes widened, and I asked, hushed, “Did you tell them to do it?”

“Shay.”

I saw that he had. Something fell away inside of me. Maybe it was truth, maybe it was loyalty, maybe it was idealism? “I thought you had changed from today. I was wrong. I was
stupidly
wrong.”

“What’s the problem? It’s not like you don’t know we do this sometimes.”

“You could’ve wiped his memory. You could’ve broken his legs. You could’ve—you didn’t have to kill him.”

“I didn’t kill him.”

“You had them kill him. His blood is on you, too.” I gestured to the house, to our siblings, and then back to Kellan, to his hands. “I can’t believe…after tonight…”

Suddenly, my anger raised a notch. My stomach churned on itself, and I lifted surprised eyes to my brother. My hands lifted upward, and I saw my skin trembling. Something was growing inside of me, and it was angry. It was angry with Kellan. I felt the same hatred from before—what he had initially warned me. Whatever was inside of me hated Kellan in that moment.

“You need to go.” Kellan jerked forward a step.

“No!” I stopped him. “Don’t come close. I might—” I was scared of what I could do in that moment.

“Shay, you need to calm down.” His tone was quiet, soothing.

“Why?” The word wrung out of me. Why did he care? Why now?

“Because you’re going to hurt someone if you don’t. The ground is shaking.” He was completely still, frozen in front of me.

My eyes snapped open—I hadn’t realized I’d closed them—and I felt it rumble beneath us. I could do that; I could make the ground move. No, it was whatever was inside of me. That was making everything storm around us. The elements answered to it.

“What am I?” I choked out.

Kellan looked at me with grave eyes. He knew I’d just used my second question.

The question hung in the air between us. I wanted answers, and I could see Kellan didn’t want to give them. Then his eyes snapped past my shoulder, and he murmured, “They’re coming. They can’t know.”

As soon as he stopped, the door opened behind me, and Gus asked, “Are you guys coming in or not?”

“Why?” I turned around. “You think we’re going to sit down for a game of checkers?” I tried to hold back the bitter sarcasm, but I couldn’t.

Her eyes widened in surprise.

Vespar stepped around her, his shoulders tense. “What’s your problem? You were high and mighty before. What brought you down?”

The question felt like a challenge. He was still angry with me, but I didn’t care. There was blood on their hands, and I could smell it. The stench churned my stomach. It sickened me. And I said as much, “You disgust me.”

The air swelled around us in tension.

Vespar’s eyes sparked in eagerness. A malicious smile flashed for a second. “I disgust you? What did I do this time? Let’s remember that I’m not the one giving out our secret to the world.”

Gus touched his hand, but he flicked her away.

Something started to stir inside of me. Maybe it was revulsion or just plain anger, but Kellan moved ahead of me before it started boiling. He murmured, “Let’s go to bed for the rest of the night. We can calm down and talk tomorrow.”

“You’re going to let her talk to me like that?”

Kellan bristled. “Shay can say whatever she likes.”

“Right.”

“As do you.” Kellan moved another step forward. He was almost directly in front of Vespar now, staring at him steadfastly.

Vespar narrowed his eyes. The anger shimmered just underneath the surface, ready to burst out, but it never did. He fought a battle inside of him and jerked around with his hands clenched in fists. “Come on, Gus.”

A sly smile flickered over Gus’ face, but her eyes caught mine. Her face went blank immediately, and then Vespar jerked her behind him. As he dragged her into the house, her eyes held mine. Something akin to fear and amazement flared briefly. Then the door slammed shut behind her, and it was only Kellan and me outside. We heard doors slam shut, and then there was silence. It echoed around us. Eerily.

Kellan sighed. “Why did you have to bait him?”

“Same reason I’m not happy with you. You let them kill someone.”

His eyes found mine, searching. “Are you kidding me? I know you might feel like you’re holy now because you found out that you’re not a demon, but you’ve known your whole life how we operate. This isn’t the first time they’ve killed. And Leah’s stepfather needed to be ridded from this world. Trust me. She wasn’t the only girl he’s hurt.”

Shivers went down my back. “What are you talking about?”

“He raped three of her friends. They all wanted me to do something about him. He’d hurt more. He’d hurt you, if he could.” Then he added, softer, “Besides, Vespar needed to hurt somebody.”

“He wanted to hurt me.”

“I wouldn’t allow that.”

My eyes clung to his. “Why not?”

His eyes closed, and I felt a wall slam between us. As he turned away, I already knew he’d retreated from me. “We should go to bed. I am a little tired.”

We had another day of school before the weekend. Sometimes I wondered why we attended school, but Kellan always said a part of us were human. We should live as much as we could as humans do. And he was right, though we had demon blood in us didn’t mean… Who was I kidding?

I remembered the painter’s words.
“They’re demons. You’re not.”

Kellan started to go inside, but when he saw that I didn’t follow, he turned back. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m not one of you.” I whispered those words and stared at him. A part of me wanted him to refute those words. I wanted him to say that I was. We both knew he couldn’t. “I’m not a demon, so does that mean I don’t have demon blood in me? Who am I, Kellan? You told me that you’d answer my questions. That’s my second one.”

Exhaustion appeared on his face as he stepped close and took my hand. He whispered back, tenderly “I will answer you, but not now.”

I opened my mouth to argue, but he shook his head.

“I never agreed on a time restriction. I will answer that question, but not yet. And you are one of us. You’re family.” His hands squeezed mine once before letting go. “Come on. You can sleep with me tonight.”

Something calmed inside of me. The human world didn’t approve of something like this, but something more primal existed in us. I still felt it, even if I wasn’t a demon. Being close to another, to one whom you trusted, calmed us. I remembered Kellan’s other words.
“You can’t hide from what’s demanding to come out. The more you’re with me, the angrier it will get.”

He spoke now, as if reading my mind, “You quieted it. It’s sleeping, or you’ve turned it off.”

What is inside of me?
My eyes clasped together tightly as I thought that. I put a hand over my stomach, as if calming the storm inside.

“Shay,” Kellan spoke, now in front of the house.

I hadn’t noticed that he’d gone ahead of me. “What?”

He gestured inside. “Come on. I want to sleep.”

My head bent forward, and I followed, feeling meek for some reason, as I followed Kellan up the three flights of stairs to his bedroom. He kept the loft on the top floor. The rest of us had the three bedrooms on the second floor. As I climbed up the stairs to his room, my eyes caught sight of his king-sized bed. Images of girls writhing around in desire flashed in my mind. I barely held back my revulsion.

Kellan laughed softly from his bathroom. “I can feel your thoughts again. I’ve never brought a girl here, Shay. This is a sacred place.”

Later, as we had both gotten dressed and ready for bed, Kellan lay beside me. I felt his heat curled against my side. Something felt right, but something didn’t at the same time. He said softly in the dark, “You don’t have to be scared of what’s coming in the future. You’re my family.”

The way he said ‘
my family’
sparked something powerful in me. It was as if he laid claim to me or would die protecting me. I wasn’t sure what he meant, but I wasn’t brave enough to ask. A part of me was scared of his answer to that question, so I remained silent with my hands curled in the blanket.

“Sleep,” he murmured next.

I closed my eyes, and a contentedness filled my limbs. I felt sleep invade my body, and when I woke, I felt refreshed, as if I’d slept for an entire week. I glanced at the clock. It had only been four hours. I looked the other way and saw that Kellan was gone. His space was empty, and his shower was running.

It was an odd feeling in the pit of my stomach as I tiptoed out of his room and down to mine. It was like I was hiding a secret, but when I was about to enter my room, Gus spoke from the hallway, “You don’t have to feel ashamed.”

I glanced back and saw she was in Vespar’s doorway. “What do you mean?”

“You slept in Kellan’s bed last night. It’s not the same for us as it is with humans. It’s not about sex, but comfort.” She straightened to her fullest height. Then she tossed her blonde tendrils over her shoulder. “Vespar is my brother more than Kellan is. More my sibling than you are. You’re feeling human emotions right now, but why you stayed with him last night wasn’t human.”