Exploits (30 page)

I replace the lid on the now half-empty bottle, pull the blanket over myself and pass out.

* * * * *

I'm woken by ice cold hands shaking me, "STEFANIE!"

I force my drowsy eyes open and stare up into his mother's face.

I smile at the kind woman. She's the best member of his family. Maybe Gary's adopted.

"Sit up, love. Are you all right?"

"I'm fine."

Just play act the way Gary does. Lie your way out of your hell. Why won't anyone just leave me alone to die in peace?

"Gary's worried."

Sure he is. You lot will swallow anything
. I smile with conviction, "I'm just really tired. I have such a headache."

"Stand up."

I sigh inwardly. Here goes. She was a nurse in her day. I'm about to get busted and have to go to a real straitjacket. Within the next hour I'll be assessed mentally unfit to be allowed in society. The population is safer without me. Lock me away and lose the key. Set it in concrete and throw it into the ocean above the Bermuda Triangle. That should work.

I stand and let her manhandle me. She pushes my sleeves up which thankfully bunch at the elbows, and examines my wrists. She even checks my thighs. Yes I know, I thought of using that vein too. Now I'm glad I didn't.

Satisfied I haven't tried to harm myself, she smoothes a worried hand over my face. "Darling, what happened?"

I can never tell you. But your caring is shredding my heart. I want to cry with abandon now. Why couldn't he be more like you?

"I just had a bad weekend, and am exhausted. Do you mind if I go back to bed? I'm very tired."

She hugs me tightly to her, "Sure. Okay." She holds me at arms length, tracing her hands down my arms to squeeze my fingers, "Call me if you need anything. We're all very worried about you."

I nod, "Thanks." I force another smile. I've grown to love this woman. I wish I could keep her.

I climb back into bed. These tablets really work as a sedative. My head is spinning, and I pass out as soon as my head hits the pillow.

* * * * *

"You're seriously fucked up, you know that?"

Goddam. I'm still not fucking dead! Oh yippeefuckingkayay. I look at Gary standing next to me, staring down at my slumbering form. I'm awake now. I resolve to keep quiet.

"I want you gone. You hear me? I'm not having some fucked-up bitch hanging around here to screw up my life. You're fucked up!"

I heard you. Yes, I am fucked up. Astute assessment Doctor Fuchs. I pronounce the patient, fucked up. There is no medication available at this time for fucked up. Like a leper, she must be excommunicated as quickly as possible. Outcasts are not welcome here. We must keep the mask in perfect alignment. The impression we make is paramount.
All fucked-up individuals must be swiftly removed for the sake of our pristine appearance to the world around us. 

I almost want to smile as I imagine introducing myself at my next job interview, "How do you do, I'm Fucked Up. And you are?"

"STEFANIE? Do you hear me?"

"Yes."

He seems frustrated as he stomps from the room. Within moments I hear the resounding slam of the front door.

I lay there for some time. Seeking a solution. Finally I find one. Cindy and Graham are moving. In fact, if memory serves me well, they have already left, this morning. On assignment, out of the country, for two years. I found this out when I spoke to Cindy's sister a while back. Out of everyone, at least she still speaks to me. They'll be renting their house out. I walked past it just the other day and it was empty. Maybe I can call Cindy's mom and get her to let me stay there for a week or two while I apply for work. I just need a place to stay.

Chapter 38

Lucas

You know what? I've just about had enough of this heathen's attitude for one lifetime. Seriously! Hurling back the duvet, I stomp to the phone and snatch the handset, punching Selene's number hard enough to jam the buttons.

"I have to get out,
now
. Please can I stay at your place?"

"So miracles do happen. Sure. My brother has a spare key and he's not working today. I'll get him to pick you up."

"I owe you more than I can ever repay."

"Seeing you leave that backwards prick is enough payment. See you later."

"Selene?"

"Hmm?"

"Ask Sinclaire if I can have my old job back?"

"Yeah, okay."

"I love you girlfriend."

"I know. You owe me a roast chicken!"

"Done!"

"Bye."

"Bye."

Yanking on clothes, I bolt to the twenty-four hour service station on the corner, purchasing smokes and withdrawing some of my dwindling funds. Rather pleased with myself, I return to Gary's home to prepare for my exodus.

Stalking into the kitchen I unearth the clean ashtrays, plonk myself down in the lounge, and light three. Smoking one, I then leave one in each of the other ashtrays to burn themselves out, with all the windows closed. Just call me Shirley. I Shirley
will
do everything you told me not to.

Deliberately ashing on the tiles on my way to the fridge, I unpack all of the ciders into my cooler box. Rifling through the wine collection I help myself to half. Actually, fuck that. Feeling like a fishwife with a smoke dangling from my lip, I use both hands to unpack the wine rack into packets; they're coming with me. How can I celebrate freedom from slavery without enough booze for a frat party? He'll only waste this stuff seducing other victims so I may as well try and save them any way I can, starting with removing the ammunition from the corked shotgun.

Systematically I help myself to supplies, including the chicken that Selene will have waiting for her with potatoes and all the trimmings when she gets home from work today. Only people who love me will get to eat my cooking from now on. My newly discovered malicious streak is tempting me to leave the freezer door open. I battle it for a few minutes while I get packed; eventually integrity wins and I close the blasted thing.

With much pleasure I switch off the geyser. I wonder how long it will take him to figure out why there's no hot water? Giggle. I then take an entire box of tampons, unwrap them, and dump them one by one into his toilet. A little reminder of a woman scorned and messed with for the last time. Moving to my hairbrush I remove all of the long hair wrapped into it and stuff it into the shower outlet, running some cold water to secure it in there.

While I wait for Selene's brother I sit and smoke another cigarette in the bedroom, on a deliberately unmade bed. Call me pathetic but I'm thoroughly enjoying this rebellion, which in my opinion is about three years overdue.

It's a gorgeous day. The sky is such a perfect shade of periwinkle, not even a suggestion of a cloud anywhere, it seems such a waste smogging up Gary's passion pit for revenge. Grabbing my packed cases I wheel them outside and stack up everything else I'm taking with me. I bought the groceries, so I own them and they leave with me. Selene and I will at least eat well for a month.

I need some retail therapy, a great night out, and some cold-hearted flirting. It dawns on me as I sit waiting on my suitcase, that for years I've followed the worst example set for me. My parents had an explosive marriage, the kind where my mom always lost the war. We lived in the trenches, self pity and hardship became comfortable blankets in that kind of environment. But, one day she snapped, pretty much the way I did yesterday. I remember that day as clearly as if it happened this morning. Then finally she left him, taking us with her. She showed us how to take a chance, stand up for yourself, and how not to be a victim, so what the hell was I thinking?

Jarred out of my reverie, a dude with shocking blond hair down to his chin touches my shoulder. I give him my 'drop dead asshole' glare.

"You Stefanie?"

Lordy, this can't be her brother, it's just not possible. "Yes."

"I'm Lucas, Selene's brother."

Okay, now I know Selene has never introduced us before. She likes to lead a life her family has no access to, which includes her friends. I also know that her brother is at least five years older, but I am telling you, this boy does not look five years older, and he's damn delicious eye bling. I offer him a hand, warming up from my Arctic freeze.

"Stef. It's great to finally meet you." We shake on the introduction.

"This your stuff?"

No it's the neighbours, I'm just sitting it for her while she shags her boyfriend. "Um, yes."

My final insult is flicking my cigarette butt into Gary's postbox. Oh I really do hope someone is witnessing this. I would love to see his face when he's told some hot man-popsicle picked me up and we drove off into a Doris Day morning, never to be heard from again. It would drive him to distraction trying to figure out how long I've been cheating on him with a new blonde-hot-sexilicious replacement. Trading up darling, this guy has a better view out his window. Actually, the car's a bit formal isn't it? A Volvo isn't exactly my idea of vogue. Haha! This may be even better, Gary can surmise I'm off to be a kept woman.

Yes I know, my imagination is in full pantomime mode. Anyway, so I'm helping Lucas pack my stuff into this car with enough space to hide the entire mafia and their cement clad victims, the spaciousness just pings the hollow in my heart with a sad echo. My life doesn't even fill a car's boot. It's super nice when he opens my door for me, and oooh, look at that, a hand on my waist that lingered far too long to be appropriate. I grin at him and wonder if Selene will turn him into a eunuch if I encourage this.

After securing my seat-belt, I lean back, stretch out my legs, and give Lucas a shy smile.

"Sorry I took so long, my phone was on charge."

You didn't take long at all. "No problem."

Ten minutes later, thanks to the absence of traffic at this time of the morning, we stop outside Selene's home up on her Prince Charming hill. Joining Lucas with the unpacking I ask, "Do you live nearby?"

He points up the hill, "End of the road."

You have got to be kidding me! How is it that I've never known this? How often has he seen me and I've not even known he was here? I guess my face betrays me because he starts explaining.

"I'm away on business a lot. Selene keeps an eye on the place for me. It was easier for me being closer to her for convenience."

Well I can see a huge drawbridge lowering down waiting to be crossed. "Would you like to join us for dinner?"

He stops with the key in his hand, pausing before pushing the door open, looking regretful, "I can't. I have a date."

Oh right. Don't I just feel stupid. Of course you have a date. Heck, you probably have every weekend booked until the day you turn fifty.

"Not a problem, I just thought I could repay your kindness."

He pauses outside her kitchen where he deposits my cases, while I place the groceries on the kitchen counter, telling me, "Selene doesn't like me talking to her friends. You're kind of off limits."

That sounds like Selene. She takes paranoia to Illuminati level. If he knew what I know about her she'd probably get locked up in her parent's basement until she's seventy-five.

"That's cool." I'm trying to give the vibe that it's not any of my business and I don't want to get involved.

"Anyway, if you need anything before she gets home, I'm at number twenty-four."

I nod, feeling awkward, but offer him a smile,"Thanks a lot for rescuing me."

He shrugs, stuffing a hand into his left front pocket, "That's what friends do." He shuffles the toe of a foot into the other, staring down, mumbling, "See you round." Looking up, for the first time I get a really good look into his eyes. They're clear and sensitive. It's so odd, but I get the impression that he's shy around me. "It was nice meeting you. I've heard a lot about you."

Oh god! None of it can be good. "It was very nice meeting you too."

He smiles. Perfect teeth, great skin, gentle light blue eyes that most Husky's wish they owned. How can they be so different? Her colouring is completely opposite to his.

I walk with him to the door, locking it behind him. Standing at the window I watch him drive away and pull into his garage farther up the road, the door closing behind him. He must have a door from there going into his house.

Wow! I wish Selene had introduced me to him. But knowing me, she probably thought I'd be too wild for such a sweet guy. Sighing heavily, I go straight to the kitchen counter and unearth a bottle of red wine. I haven't had a drink in forever, and dammit, I'm fucking old enough to drink. I've lived with Gary's demented rules for so long, as if I was something to be controlled and restrained.

Uncorking it, I pour half of the bottle into one of Selene's gigantic glasses. Picking up my smokes I walk back out the door, locking it behind me, walking around to the mountain to stare at her view. Settling myself on the same old pity rock, I lean back, letting the sun thaw the tundra inside me, rebelliously drinking red wine before noon on a work day, and lighting a smoke that makes my lungs ache.