Extra Time (17 page)

She threw him another look that caused that flinch to return. ‘You and promises, Jim – they don’t go together, so don’t make them, okay? Just, don’t.’

She turned to walk into the bathroom but he quickly stopped her, gently grabbing her arm and swinging her round. ‘Amber… I love you, and you need to know that. You need to know just how much I love you, how much I really need you and I know you hate me doing this, but I promise you, baby, I will never, ever hurt you again. There are no more secrets, no more lies, no more skeletons in any closet, I promise you that.’ He looked into her eyes, eyes that were red and damp from the tears she was still crying, although they were falling silently now, running slowly down her beautiful face. He loved her so much, and the thought that this could push her away scared the hell out of him. ‘I love you, Amber. It’s as simple as that. I love you.’

She stared up at him, wanting to believe him, needing to believe him, because she didn’t want to lose him. Not again, she couldn’t face that. She couldn’t, she wasn’t strong enough, not anymore. ‘Yeah. I know you do. And despite everything, Jim, I love you, too. God help me, I love you, too.’

Chapter Nine

Ryan hung his head, watching out of the window as Ellen practically skipped down the road, away from his apartment building, off to enjoy a day with her friends in town, unaware that he wasn’t going to be around later like she hoped he was going to be. He had plans. The last thing he wanted her to think was that he was available at her beck and call whenever she wanted him. That was
his
territory.

Moving away from the window, he pushed a hand through his messed-up hair as he walked over to the kitchen. His head was still banging, that self-inflicted hangover making its appearance felt once again now the morning sex was over and reality was back. He needed some kind of quick-fix relief, especially as Max was due any minute now. He really didn’t want or need his agent to see him looking like shit, even if that’s exactly how he felt. But he’d needed last night, needed that chance to escape, even if it had only been for a few hours. He’d needed to be with someone, to do something that took his mind off everything that was going on, but he also knew he had to make a decision soon. He had to grow up and face things head-on, or he knew he could be in danger of losing it all – and he wasn’t willing to go there again.

Pouring himself a glass of orange juice, he sat down in a chair by the window, bowing his head, focusing on his blue and yellow trainers – one of the many freebies he’d been given over the course of his career. He’d lost count of how many others he’d received, everything from holidays to flat-screen TVs, even a car. And yet, right now, he’d give it all away if it meant he could just turn the clock back and make everything right. Turn his future into something he wanted, rather than something he needed to do.

Knocking back what he hoped would be a miraculous cure for his headache from hell, he wondered if a nice greasy fry-up would have been a better option, but he didn’t have the energy to crack an egg, never mind cook up the full works. Maybe he should have asked Ellen to make him breakfast before she’d left. He was sure she’d have done so gladly, but letting her take control in his kitchen might have sent off more of those wrong signals he really didn’t want her to pick up on. So a glass of orange juice would have to do.

He’d no sooner drained his glass, putting it down on the table in front of him, pushing it away with his foot, when he heard the front door of his riverside apartment open, causing him to look up sharply, which he soon realised had been a really bad idea, given his condition.

‘Jesus Christ. What happened to this being a secure building?’

Max Mandell, Ryan’s agent, kicked the front door shut behind him and walked into the large, open-plan living area, his hands shoved deep in the pockets of his no-doubt extremely expensive dark grey suit. ‘What’s wrong?’ he asked, looking briefly at Ryan before going straight into the kitchen and flicking on the kettle.

‘Huh?’ Ryan frowned, getting up and following Max. ‘What the fuck are you talking about?’

‘You look shifty,’ Max said, leaning back against the counter and folding his arms. ‘Like you’re up to something.’

‘What the…? Why do you always think the worst of me?’

Max just raised an eyebrow. Max Mandell was one of the most respected and revered football agents around, not to mention one of the shrewdest. He’d been Ryan’s agent for almost eight years and he knew him better than anybody, having been with him through the many highs and lows that Ryan’s career had experienced. His client list was short, but the names he had on that list were big names, names that brought the money in, and because of who he was and what he could do for his clients, the waiting list to get on his books was growing longer by the day.

‘Jesus…’ Ryan said, turning to look out over the view of the River Tyne, the hustle and bustle of Newcastle City Centre just minutes away from his doorstep. He loved this city, he loved the life he had. But he just wasn’t sure things could stay the way they were when he still felt the way that he did.

‘You promise me you’re not up to anything?’ Max asked, pouring boiling water into a mug he’d retrieved from the cupboard.

Ryan turned back around. ‘Is this how it’s gonna be from now on? You always two steps behind me, keeping an eye on me? Making sure I’m not lapsing back into my old ways?’

Max shrugged. ‘I don’t know, Ryan. Do I need to be two steps behind you?’

Ryan averted his eyes away from Max’s, rubbing a hand up and down his tattooed arm. ‘No. You don’t.’

‘You sure?’ Max asked, looking at Ryan over the rim of his mug as he sipped his coffee. ‘Because, judging by the state of you, I don’t think you came home last night and went straight to bed. Not on your own, anyway.’

‘For Christ’s sake,’ Ryan sighed, finding it hard to keep the irritation out of his voice. ‘I told you I wasn’t going back there, okay? And I mean it this time.’

‘Well, let’s hope you do. Anyway, I thought you might like to come with me to the Wearside Spartans match this afternoon. My newest client’s playing and I want to be there to support him.’

‘Newest client?’ Ryan frowned, rubbing a hand along the back of his neck.

‘Brandon Palmer,’ Max said, looking at Ryan as though he should be aware of this fact. ‘Managed to snare his signature before he’d even set foot on British soil. I mean, the fact he’s Jim Allen’s son should mean there’s some talent in there somewhere, not to mention the fact that his family links alone will have the sponsorship deals flooding in. And he’s a good-looking kid, so that’s a bonus…’

‘Whoa, hang on…’ Ryan interrupted, confusion now setting in big time. ‘Can you rewind a bit there? Did you say Brandon Palmer was Jim Allen’s
son
?’

Max looked at Ryan with that same expression that said he really should know all this. ‘Yes. Christ, have you not been listening to any news at all this morning? It’s been kept a bit of a secret, granted, which hasn’t made my job any easier, but I guess the kid wanted to get noticed on his own merits rather than because of who his famous father is. Anyway, whatever the reason, it’s worked. He had about half a dozen clubs after him, but he wanted to go to Spartans.’

‘You
knew
he was Jim Allen’s son?’

‘Of course I knew,’ Max said, taking another sip of coffee. ‘There’s not much I don’t know about any of my clients, Ryan, you should know that by now. I can’t deal with people’s shit if I don’t know anything about it.’

‘And… does Amber know about this?’

‘No, she doesn’t. Well, she didn’t, but apparently Jim broke the news to her this morning, although Christ knows why he hasn’t told her before. The kid’s twenty-years-old for heaven’s sake. But who am I to question what kind of relationships these people have?’ He took another sip of coffee as Ryan continued to stare at him in disbelief. ‘Anyway, thank heavens Amber’s playing ball and acting the role of the proud stepmother. It’s a wise move. It won’t cause any added or unwanted media attention, which I know she hates. We’re trying to keep the focus on Brandon here. She’s a good girl is Amber. Sensible. She knows the score. No pun intended there by the way.’

Listening to Max talk about Amber so candidly made Ryan flinch slightly.

‘But…’ Max went on, oblivious to Ryan’s feelings, ‘… as far as I’m concerned it’s going to make great headlines. And it won’t do her new career any harm either. Married to the Premier League’s most successful manager, step-mum to his extremely talented son – and an extremely beautiful step-mum at that. Actually, that’s just reminded me, I’ve got a few men’s magazines chomping at the bit to have her featured on their covers wearing nothing but a Newcastle Red Star scarf and a smile.’

‘Jesus fucking Christ, Max…’

‘What? What have I said?’

‘Have you heard yourself? Jim Allen has only
now
told Amber that he has a twenty-year-old son? And she’s okay with that?’

‘I have no idea whether she’s okay with that or not, Ryan. What happens between her and Jim behind closed doors is none of my business.’

‘Shit! This is fucking crazy.’

‘All I know is I’ve now got half the Allen family on my books, and that equals big bucks. For everyone concerned.’ Max didn’t usually represent TV presenters, or any other kind of entertainment-based celebrities – he was a football agent. That’s what he specialised in. But he’d seen something in Amber, and he wanted to be the one to guide her to exactly where she needed to be. As far as he was concerned she’d been wasted in regional TV. She deserved a bigger platform, and he’d gotten her exactly that. And the fact he now represented her stepson, too, well, Max couldn’t be happier. ‘The money is gonna come rolling in, I can feel it.’

‘And fuck how people may be feeling, is that it?’ Ryan sneered, his mind now on something other than his own problems.

Max arched an eyebrow again. ‘Sorry? And who are you? Mr. I-give-everything-I-earn-away? This is what I do, Ryan. I’m an agent.’ He put his now-empty mug down on the counter behind him. ‘Anyway, what did you want to speak to me about?’

Ryan leaned back against the wall, pushing a hand through his hair. He’d almost forgotten that it was him who’d asked Max to come over. ‘It doesn’t matter.’

Max looked at him through slightly narrowed eyes. ‘Well, it sounded like it mattered when you called me yesterday.’

‘It can wait,’ Ryan sighed, his headache now a thing of the past. ‘It’s not important.’

‘You sure?’ Max asked, his expression conveying that he didn’t entirely believe what Ryan was telling him. ‘Look, Ryan, if there’s something going on…’

‘I’d tell you, Max. All right? I’d tell you. I promise.’

That seemed to placate Max, but for how long Ryan had no idea. And it wasn’t that he’d changed his mind about what he was going to do, it was just that, after what Max had told him, he wasn’t really in the mood to talk about it right now.

‘Okay,’ Max said, keeping his eyes on Ryan. ‘Well, come on, then. Let’s get going. I want to have a word with Brandon before kick-off.’

There were people Ryan wanted a word with, too. But Brandon Palmer wasn’t one of them.

‘Everything all right?’ Ronnie asked as Amber joined him up in the makeshift TV studio in the corner of the ground.

‘Everything’s fine. Why wouldn’t it be?’

Ronnie diverted his attention away from what was happening on the pitch outside to look at her. ‘Sorry, am I missing something here? Didn’t your husband just inform you, not an hour ago, that he has a secret son? A son who just happens to be making his debut as a Premiership player for a rival local club this afternoon?’

‘I’m dealing with it.’

Ronnie turned back to look outside. Some of the players from both teams were warming up on the pitch, but there was no sign of Brandon Palmer. ‘Yeah, well, maybe you need to stop “dealing” with things in your usual way.’

‘And what way would that be?’

‘Burying your head in the sand and trying to pretend that things don’t exist, or that the problem will just go away if you leave it alone for long enough.’

‘Jesus, Ronnie, credit me with a little bit of intelligence, will you? We’re talking about a human being here, so he isn’t just going to “go away”, is he?’

‘No. He isn’t.’ He turned round and leaned back against the huge plate-glass window that looked out over the pitch. ‘So, have you met him yet?’

‘No. Not yet.’

‘And, are you going to?’

‘In a minute, yes. Jim’s just talking to him.’

‘Telling him what to say, huh?’

‘What is wrong with you?’

Ronnie let out a cynical laugh, folding his arms. ‘Well, forgive me, Amber, but it would appear that Jim’s spent twenty years making sure that kid was kept a secret so…’

‘Can we stop this now, please?’

‘Stop what? Me telling you how it really is?’

‘I don’t need this, Ronnie. I’ve got enough on my mind…’

‘He lied to you, Amber. Again.’

‘I’m aware of that.’ She looked at him, reaching out to take his hand, squeezing it gently. ‘And I’m also aware that you’re only looking out for me, that you care about me…’

‘Yeah. I do. And never forget that.’

She couldn’t help smiling, squeezing his hand again. ‘You never give me a chance to. Look, I know it sounds as though I’m… as though I’m just turning a blind eye to what he’s done, but what’s the point in going off on one, huh?’

‘To let him know how you feel?’

‘He knows how I feel.’

‘Does he?’

‘Yes. He does. But I love him, Ronnie. I can’t help it, okay? I love him, and this isn’t going to change that. I won’t let it. Because I won’t lose him, not again. Yes, I’m angry. Yes, I’m upset that he didn’t tell me and yes, I still don’t know how this is all going to pan out, but… but I need him right now, you know? I really need my husband.’

Ronnie pulled her into his arms, hugging her tight, kissing the top of her head. ‘I know, kiddo. But you’ve always got me, you know that, don’t you?’

She pulled away from him slightly. ‘Yeah. I know.’