Far From Heaven (8 page)

“It’s all right,” he murmured against her hair.

Minutes passed, and true embarrassment began to fill the emptiness left in the wake of panic. She didn’t want to lift her head from his chest because she didn’t want to face him, didn’t want to have to explain. Not that she owed him anything. It was morning, so surely he’d be out the door and out of her life within an hour. Better to just let it go and get back to reality.

Reality would be good. The nightmare still hovered at the fringes of her memory, intruding despite her efforts to hold it at bay. She tried to breathe deeply, slowly, but her lungs refused to cooperate just yet.

Then Ash tilted her chin up and kissed her.

She hadn’t expected it, wasn’t prepared. She only had time for one fleeting fear about morning breath and then she was swept away.

Nothing was wrong with the way he tasted. It was better than coffee. His lips gently teased hers apart and his tongue slipped between her teeth, the sensual motions reminding her in excruciating detail of the other things he was good at doing with it. His hands cradled her face; his biceps flexed under her hand…a hand that wasn’t clenching him in fear any longer, but softening with desire.

How did he do that? How did he chase away all the bad stuff?

“Better now?” he murmured, pulling away only to continue taking little nips at her mouth.

“Mm-hmm,” she replied, scarcely recognizing her own voice. She sounded sated, fulfilled…she even felt sleepy again. When she opened her eyes, she saw that the morning was slowly chasing away the last of the shadows in her room. Usually she welcomed it. This particular day, she would like to be able to postpone its arrival, only for a while.

Ash laid her head back down on his chest, stroking her hair. “Go back to sleep.”

It sounded divine, but still sent a little sliver of panic through her. “I don’t know if I can. The dreams—”

“I’ll keep them away.”

It was cheesy, romantic nonsense, but something melted around her heart.

She almost believed him.

Delia was late to her own store, as usual. No big deal. It wasn’t as if a line was waiting when Maddie unlocked the door and disarmed the security system.

It was almost eleven. She’d had a couple more hours of blessedly dreamless sleep in Ash’s arms and then she’d seen him off. It had been…odd, a little awkward, and he’d seemed reluctant to leave, looking at her in a way she found confusing. As if there was something he wanted to do or say before he finally gave up the battle with himself and kissed her goodbye. Nothing had been said about seeing each other again, but of course, he knew where to find her if he wanted.

She knew nothing about him. No phone number, no address…that ball was entirely in his court. She’d be a freaking liar if she said she hoped he wouldn’t do something with it. So much for love them and leave them.

Delia bounced in thirty minutes later, bearing a bakery box and Starbucks despite it being nearly noon. She’d probably just rolled out of bed herself. Her shoulder-length black hair wasn’t as immaculately tousled as usual, but smooth and flat. Her eyes were covered with oversized sunglasses.

Maddie eyed the box and cocked an eyebrow at her. “I was thinking about
lunch
.”

“Hell, I’ll eat all this and whatever you go get. I’m starving.” Delia tossed the white box on the counter and flipped it open, attacking the flaky pastry with gusto. She bit into one and her face underwent a shift to orgasmic bliss.

Maddie reached over and pulled Delia’s glasses off, tilting her chin up and inspecting her eyes as the other girl chewed and stared back impassively. Clear. “No hangover, then? I’m impressed.”

“Nah. I didn’t even go out.”

“Really? I tried to call you.”

“I crashed early.”

“What’s gotten into you?”

Delia shrugged. Only after she’d demolished a croissant did she sip her coffee and pass Maddie her own. “Did you get me cheese danish?” Maddie asked.

“It’s
lunch
time,” Delia mimicked, propelling the box toward her. “Of course I did.”

“Like I need it.” She’d packed on a few extra pounds in the past several months…okay, more than a few. She was a stress eater, and, well, there had been a lot of stress to eat about lately. Two weeks ago, in a fit of rage, she’d tossed her scales in the cabinet under the sink. It was too depressing to watch the numbers climb. “I need to start exercising,” she announced suddenly.

Delia almost choked, managed to swallow with an audible gulp. “Jesus, Mad, when would you have time? Sometimes I want to fire you just so you can relax.”

“Ha. Don’t you dare. I would starve.”

“Well, maybe I would feed you every now and then.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“It’s only because I love you. So, how did your date go last night?”

She’d known the question was coming. For the past couple of days she’d been confiding in Delia about her hopes for last night. Breathing deep, she said, “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you. You absolutely will not believe it. I mean, I’m glad it’s not April Fool’s Day, or you’d accuse me of trying to pull one over on you.”

Delia’s round blue eyes had grown even rounder and seemingly even bluer as Maddie spoke. “What the hell. Did he
propose
?”

“He dumped me.”

Delia’s jaw dropped. “That bastard! Holy crap! Mad…I mean, holy crap! Why the… what the… Dude, you look pretty awesome for just having been dumped. I mean, you’re
glowing
. It doesn’t make any sense. With the way you’re looking, I was expecting you to flash your fucking new diamond sparkler or something.”

“It makes perfect sense once you hear all of it.”

“What, did you make up and break up all in one night? Wild make-up sex?”

“I think we can safely say David is out of the picture. There was no wild make-up sex. There was, however, wild sex.”

Maddie chanced a look at her friend and burst out laughing. There was no description for the look on Delia’s face. She only wished she had a camera to capture it for posterity. Or just to hang on the wall in this place. Plenty of the regulars would get a kick out of it.

“With
who
?”

“Oh God, Dee. This guy. I met this
guy
by some freak accident in the parking garage as I was leaving the restaurant. And he was…wonderful and gorgeous and sexy, and we talked for only a few minutes but…I took him home with me.”

“Holy shit! I’m…speechless! And speechless never happens to me.”

“I know, right?”

“So, spill. Details, girl.”

“Oh, I can’t go into all the lurid details. But he was…he was awesome.” Maddie practically felt the wistfulness in her own smile as she lifted her coffee to her lips. She glanced at Delia over the cup. Her friend shook her head slowly, still in disbelief.

“Damn. I feel as proud as a…as a mother or something, like my little Maddie is all growed up now.”

“Let’s not be ridiculous. It happened, and it was good, and it definitely got my mind off things. If nothing else, it showed me there’s plenty more out there. David wasn’t the be-all, end-all.”

“So are you going to see this guy again? Tell me his name, at least. Maybe I know him if he’s from around here.”

“I don’t think he is. He’s got a little bit of an accent, but I can’t place it. He didn’t talk about himself much…but his name is Ash…”
Damn.
She hadn’t even asked his last name. “Um, well, we didn’t get that far. But I doubt I’ll be seeing him anymore. It was just one of those things, you know?”

“Maddie. To
me
it would be just one of those things. But to you? I don’t mean to sound all maternal on you for real, but…are you sure you’re okay with this?”

The question sent an odd pang through her. She didn’t like it how it seemed to curl up and reverberate. Flashes from the night before assaulted her…Ash’s hands on her skin, his eyes looking down at her. His hard body, the sound of his voice. For that moment, all of her senses were overwhelmed and she could still feel him deep inside her where she was still tender and aching. She waved her hand, pretending to be absorbed in looking at a couple of CDs stacked on the counter. “I’m fine.”

“You obviously like him.”

“Well…yeah, of course—for the few hours I spent with him. But so what? I made the decision. I’m a big girl, I can deal with it.”

“So what is David’s problem?”

Oh no. To tell her that would be to admit what she was going through, what she’d always gone through. What if Delia came to the same conclusion as David? What if
Maddie
was slowly coming to the same conclusion? That was the worst thought of all.

“David…doesn’t love me.” Hey, it was the truth. The truth underlying it all, actually. “End of story.”

“I’m so sorry, hon.”

“Yeah, well. You lose some, you lose some.” A bitter chuckle escaped.

“Look, there’s someone out there for you. I think maybe you should give Mr. Hot Stuff from last night a shot, see if this can go beyond the bedroom. Any man who puts a look like that on a woman’s face is worth the chance. Hell, I wish I could find that.”

Involuntarily, Maddie lifted a hand to her cheek. Did she really look that different from one night of sex? “I don’t really want to see anyone, though. I’m—” She cut off, coming dangerously close to explaining that she was dealing with
so much crap
right now, but she didn’t want Delia asking about it.

Sadness settled in her soul.
I don’t have one friend I can really talk to about this.

Except Ash. The person she’d taken home to get her mind off life, the one she’d wanted to use for orgasms but keep at a safe distance, had been the one she’d effortlessly opened up to. The one who’d held her when she freaked out with not an ounce of judgment in his eyes.

“I didn’t get his number or even his last name. I don’t know where he lives—he could just be passing through. He knows where I live, though, so if he wants to see me, it’s up to him to come to me.”

Delia nodded, looking troubled, then popped another piece of croissant into her mouth. Her expression instantly dissolved into near-ecstasy. “See, all I have to give me that womanly glow is a gigantic box of carbs.”

Maddie laughed, exhaling in relief as the pressure of this conversation lifted off her. “I think I’ll stick with that,” she said, but in truth, if Ash showed up at her door tonight, she knew she’d let him in. And the next night. And the night after that.

Damn. She was so screwed.

“I need a status update from you.”

Ash shrugged, not bothering to look at his superior. Metos lounged on his big fucking throne-like chair, stacks of ancient books and scrolls heaped around him.

“No deadlines approaching. All’s well,” Ash said.

“Is it?”

He fell silent and waited for the castigation to come, whatever it was…though he had a feeling he knew. He’d been falling down on the job lately; he could admit it.

“I notice you have far fewer cases than any of the others. Care to explain why you’ve grown so lazy?”

“Would it help if I did?”

Metos just stared at him. Ash sighed and continued. “I highly doubt pleading my own case will exonerate me. It never has before.”

“What’s the matter, Ash? Burned out?”

“Maybe.”

“Really. It wouldn’t be a matter of your attentions being elsewhere? Like…where they were last night?”

Damn.
Caught. Ash cast a glance at the silvery, mirrorlike pool in the corner of Metos’s cavernous lair. If one stared into it, one could see the locations of any of the demons loose upon the earth. And exactly what manner of mischief they were up to. He’d mistakenly hoped he wasn’t under close surveillance, as one of the oldest and most trusted in his profession. Looked as if that trust had been wearing thin.

“Is there a problem?” he asked carefully. Much as he hated to admit it, it was best to tread with caution lest he end up upside down over a fire pit. Or chained up in a torture dungeon.

Metos reached down over the arm of his chair and picked up one of the topmost tomes. He opened it and flipped to a page where a black ribbon lay to mark the place. As he did so, a torn piece of parchment flew from the book and landed at Ash’s feet, going unnoticed by Metos. Ash leaned over and picked it up, finding words scrawled across it in his master’s atrocious penmanship.

Thou shalt purge the abomination, banish the afflicted, for it is an offense Hell cannot deign to hold.

Ash stared at the unfamiliar law. What the fuck was such an offense Hell wouldn’t even hold it? He’d never heard of that before. Whatever it was, it must be an extremely rare occurrence. Curiosity getting the better of him, he opened his mouth to ask, but Metos cut him off.

“I’ll take that.” Ash looked up to find Metos’s waiting hand stretched toward him, his eyes narrowed in warning. With a shrug, he handed it back. Must be ultra-top-secret master demon business.

Metos settled back in his chair. “Now. According to my records, your contract with one Maxwell Gatlin for the soul of Madeleine Dean is open-ended. You can move at any time now, but it’s been two years. Why haven’t you collected?”

“Because it’s open-ended,” Ash said slowly, as if he were speaking to an uncomprehending child. So much for treading cautiously. “I’m enjoying the game. Choosing my moment to strike.”

“And you didn’t get it last night?”

“What does it matter? She’s ours regardless if I take her now or if I let her live out her entire life and take her at the end of it.”

It was the exact same thing he’d been telling himself since she’d lifted his fingers from her chest, from over her beating heart, and kissed the tips. He didn’t have to do it now. There would be many, many more opportunities.

“I’m telling you to do it now.”

Shit.

Metos went on. “We can’t afford these delays. Every day we wait is a day those winged imbeciles can find a way to thwart us. It concerns me that I have to remind you of this. You were once one of my swiftest collectors—why linger now? Take her.”

Ash cast his gaze to the floor, refusing to give up anything through his expression alone. He
had
been prepared to strike. Last night. Last night before Madeleine had turned her blue eyes on his. He’d prepared himself again, only to be defeated by the press of her sweet lips against the hand that would’ve drawn the soul out of her.