Finding Grace: A Novel (27 page)

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Authors: Sarah Pawley

Tags: #romance, #historical, #1920s

BOOK: Finding Grace: A Novel
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In a flash the softness was gone from her
face. It was replaced once again by that cool and defensive air,
and she said quite firmly, “No thank you. I’ll just walk.”


Don’t be silly. I live
across the street from you. Let me be neighborly.”

She shook her head, and it occurred to him
that despite the close little hour they’d just spent together, her
guard against him had not come down at all. Perhaps the memory of
that night at the pier was just too fresh. Perhaps they hadn’t
lingered long enough. If he had talked with her a little longer,
would it have softened her at all? He had no way of knowing, and
now it seemed too late to go back. He sighed, frustrated, a little
at himself and a little at her for having no faith in him. But then
again, he didn’t blame her. If he were in her shoes, he would be
suspicious too. And that was strangely troubling, which he didn’t
hide from her.


Despite what you think, I
do have a few decent bones in my body. I swear on oath that you’ll
get home with your reputation unharmed.”

He turned and walked to the door, not
looking back at her but hoping she would follow. He paused at the
door and turned, waiting and watching. And much to his pleasure, a
moment later she came towards him. He opened the door to let her
precede him. As she passed by, he brushed the small of her back
with his hand, guiding her. He had done it so many times before
that it was simply a habit. But he’d never felt the reaction she
had…a nervous kind of jolt as if she’d been electrocuted. He
realized that whether or not she cared to admit it, she was still
afraid of him. And while it bothered him now more than it ever had
before, it made him quite determined to change the way she thought
of him. He was a much better man than she gave him credit for, and
he had her at just the right place, at just the right time, to
prove it to her.

Holding open the car door for her, he winced
slightly at how she hesitated. But when she got in, he smirked
slightly and closed the door after her.

Now you can’t get away so
easily
.

He went around to his side and got in,
noticing the way she nervously pulled at her dress collar. But he
didn’t make mention of it as he started the car and drove away.

As they drove along, he kept his eyes on the
road for the most part. But he saw from the corner of his eye how
she pressed herself against the door...the way she kept subtly
pulling at the hem of her dress.

Silly
girl
, he thought.
Do you really think I’m so low that I’d force myself on you?
Of course if I wanted to, I could have you without a fight. You
have no idea how persuasive I can be.

But there was a deeper need he wanted to
fill, and it went beyond temptation and lust. She triggered
something profound inside of him, a feeling of caring and empathy
he’d thought to be long dead. But she brought it to life, and he
wondered what magic she possessed to make him feel this way.
Whatever witchcraft it was, it was quite powerful. He was starting
to feel a certain possessiveness when he thought of her. He wasn’t
much of a believer when it came to fate or destiny, but something
told him she’d been sent to him for a reason. He had a faith in
that reason. She needed someone to defend her…and that was just
what he intended to do.

He pulled up in his own driveway rather than
hers, mostly to keep his lights from shining into the Langdon house
and arousing suspicion. He could sense the relief she felt in
getting back home without incident. It troubled him that she still
didn’t trust him, when he’d been such a gentleman all this time.
But he reminded himself that she had reason to be wary. Life had
made her that way. And since they’d met, he hadn’t always shown the
best side of himself. But he was determined to change that. He saw
her reach for her door handle, and he stopped her. He started to
get out.


Wait a minute and I’ll get
the door.”

Her look, and her question, were both
curious. “Why?”

He shrugged. “Etiquette,” he replied.
Quickly he got out and went around to her side of the car. Opening
her door he extended his hand to her…and she looked at his palm as
if it frightened her. He sighed at her hesitation.


It’s a hand, not a
rattlesnake.”

For another moment she looked unsure. Then
at last she reached out and put her hand in his, and the thrill he
felt was overwhelming.

Lord, her skin is so warm
and soft.
A fine tremor of heat went up his
arm, radiating into his chest and spreading to every part of his
body. For a brief moment he imagined pulling her close, holding her
tightly against him to see what it felt like. But he kept himself
from it, if only just. He’d always prided himself on his
self-discipline, and he used it now to keep from doing more than
just helping her from the car. He suspected she must have felt
something too, especially the way she avoided his eyes as she
spoke.


I’d best get home. I’m sure
my brother is pitching a fit.”

He knew he shouldn’t have touched her at
all, but he couldn’t help himself. He reached his hand out and
lifted her chin, making her look at him. His voice was soft and
kind.


You know it might not be my
place to say. But he’s your brother, not your father.”

She was looking at him, her beautiful eyes
large and shining with surprise, and if he’d been less of a man he
would have kissed her right then and there. But no, that wouldn’t
do for the moment. He’d been a gentleman all night, and to leave a
firm impression on her mind, he wanted to remain one. He released
his light hold on her chin, and putting his hat on his head, he
pulled the brim to her.


Goodnight,
Grace.”

He turned and walked away
from her, only glancing back for a moment, at his doorstep, to see
if she had gone. She had, and he felt rather disappointed that she
hadn’t lingered a little longer. He sighed
.

Oh well.
Tomorrow is another day.

 

* * * * *

 

Grace knew what she would find when she came
in the house.

She stood on the stoop for several hesitant
moments, letting out a little sigh before she opened the door.
Before she did anything, she needed to gather herself together. The
ride home had been one of the wildest experiences she’d ever had,
even thought it had all been in her imagination.

All the way home she’d had insane flashes of
things he might have done to her in the dark of his car. But he
hadn’t made a single move. He hadn’t even said a word to her, until
they were in the driveway and he was about to help her from the
car. Then his hand had held hers so firmly, sending shivers down
from her fingers to her toes. And when his fingers had held her
chin, she’d thought for certain that he would kiss her again. And
despite shaking all over with fear, she knew at that moment that
she’d wanted him to do just that. She wanted to feel his kiss
again. The moment had been so perfect. But he’d let her go, leaving
her trembling with strange feelings and a deep sense of loss.

But she had to stop thinking of that now.
More pressing matters were waiting for her on the other side of the
door, and she pressed her hands against her face for a moment,
taking a deep breath. Then she opened the door and stepped across
the threshold, the sound of the bolt clicking shut behind her. And
when she looked up there was Jack coming towards her from the
living room, his stride angry and his expression even more so.

"Where in the name of Christmas have you
been?"

She started to speak. But then, she closed
her mouth quickly. He looked so much like their father at that
moment. The way he stood so tall and rigid - the way his feet were
spread apart in his stance. Even the way the little muscle in his
cheek twitched in fury. And his eyes were just the same - their
soft brown had darkened to near black, they way their father's did
when he was angry. And Henry’s words flashed in her memory.

He’s your brother, not your father.

Those words gave her courage, made her grow
strong in defense of herself, and she knew she owed her brother not
one single explanation. In fact, she owed him nothing, and as if to
emphasize the fact, she gave him an evil glare and walked right
past him.

"Where do you think you're going?" he
demanded. "Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you!"

But she did keep walking, up the stairs and
into her room, where she slammed the door behind her. She fully
expected him to come barging in like a force of nature, just the
way their father would have done. But he didn't. In fact, there was
a sudden silence behind her that she didn't expect. She stood for
several moments, her arms crossed, still waiting for his entrance.
But there was none, and her curiosity was piqued. She wondered if
he might be playing some sort of trick on her, waiting on the other
side of the door for her to come out, and then he would pounce. She
moved cautiously toward the door, pulling it open quickly - and he
was not there. She stepped out into the hall, and then she heard
his voice. He was still downstairs. It seemed his voice, and
Alice's, were coming from the living room. And both their tones
were raised and angry. Grace went to the top of the staircase,
sitting down on the step as she listened.

"She's not a child, so why are you treating
her like one?"

"She's seventeen years old. She's not old
enough to know what's good for her."

"Oh come on, Jack. Most girls like her are
old married women with two or three brats. They're too stupid to
know anything except lying on their backs and making babies. When
they’re not doing that, they're spending their whole damned lives
chained to a house. Your sister knows exactly what's good for her,
or she wouldn't be here."

"So she got out of being married," he
snorted. "So what? That makes her an expert about the world? About
men? She has no idea what she'll get herself into if she gets
involved with someone like Henry. And damn it, as long as she's
living under my roof, I’m not going to let that happen!"

"Oh for God's sake, Jack! You sound exactly
like your father!"

Out on the steps, Grace winced as she heard
that statement. In all of her anger at her brother, she would never
have dared to say that to him. But she was not Alice, of course,
who dared to say exactly what she was thinking, no matter what the
consequences. And she could hear the absolute rage, barely
repressed, in her brother’s voice.

"Don't you ever, EVER say that to me
again.”

"Don’t point a finger in my
face, you hypocritical ass! You are acting
exactly
like your father!”


Are you deaf, woman? I told
you not to say that again!”


I’ll say whatever the hell
I want to when you’re acting like a total bonehead! If she were one
of your brothers, you wouldn't question anything she does. But just
because she's your sister…a woman…you think she knows nothing. Why
don't you just do what your father would do? Take her out behind
the house and beat her with a switch until she submits like a damn
dog!"

The front door slammed as he stormed out of
the house. Alice came to stand in the foyer, staring at the closed
door for several long moments, arms crossed as she muttered
furiously to herself.


Stupid son of a
bitch.”

Letting out a short breath, she turned to go
up the stairs. When she saw Grace sitting there, she smiled.


Eavesdropping, were you?”
She climbed the steps to sit down beside her.

Grace gave a sheepish smile. “I guess I was.
Where do you think he went?”

Alice snorted, her smile dropping away
quickly, replaced by an irritated curl of her lip.


Oh, he didn’t go anywhere.
He’s probably just sitting out there on the porch, pouting like a
child.” She turned to her with a serious, thoughtful expression.
Her voice softened. “You know, it scares the heck out of him that
he’s getting older. And that you are too.”

Grace sighed. “I think what you said scared
him more. To think he’s like our Daddy. He always said he’d never
be like him.”

Alice cast her eyes down in regret. “I know.
And maybe I shouldn’t have said that to him. But when he gets in a
mood like that, he looks and sounds exactly like your father. He
makes me so mad I’d just like to slug him right in the mouth.”

Now Grace smiled a little. “You know
something? You’re the reason he’s not a spitting image of Daddy.
When that side of him comes out, you know just how to knock it back
down to where it belongs.”

Alice smirked. “It’s a thankless job, but
someone has to do it.”

With a sigh, Grace rose to her feet.


I should probably go talk
to Jack before he does something ignorant, like going over there to
start a fight with Henry.”


Good luck with him,” Alice
stated. “I’m tired of talking to the fool. I’m going to
bed.”

She left to go up, and Grace made her way
down the stairs to the front door.

He was there, just as Alice had said he
would be. He was sitting in the swing, slowly rocking back and
forth. She looked at him for several long moments but he refused to
say anything. She went to sit beside him, and still he said
nothing. She couldn’t tolerate it any longer.

"Well?" she demanded.

"Well what?"

He sounded like an out-of-sorts child, and
she found the need to be quite stern with him.

"You
know
what. I know you're dying to say
that you're right, and I'm wrong. That I'm too young to know
anything. Am I leaving anything out?"

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