Finding Home (Finding Series, Book 1) (8 page)

“Get me ready,” Rhys said as he pulled his arm free from between their bodies and searched the nightstand drawer. Finn sat up on his knees and took the lube and condom that Rhys handed him, then lingered there, the small foil packet crunched up in his hand. He looked terrified. Rhys sat up and wrapped his arm around Finn’s waist. “What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours?” he asked between kisses. He was glad when Finn seemed to snap out of his funk and started returning each one.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” he whispered.

“Baby, nothing you do will hurt me. I swear.” He took the condom from Finn’s fist and opened it. Finn closed his eyes when Rhys gave him several long, slow pulls and Rhys wished he could drag this whole thing out just so he could enjoy the sight of Finn drowning in pleasure. But his own need was too great and he quickly rolled the condom down Finn’s length.

Finn’s eyes snapped open at the sound of the lube cap being clicked open and he stopped Rhys from pouring the sticky substance on his fingers. “Can I?” Finn asked shyly as he held out his own fingers. Rhys put a generous amount on them, then dribbled a small amount on Finn’s cock and spread it around. He shifted so he could get on his hands and knees, but Finn stopped him again. “Can we be facing? I want to see you…”

A shudder went through Rhys at the reminder that this was so much more than a casual fuck. He couldn’t even remember the last guy he’d been face to face with. Not even with his old partner, Tom, who he’d been exclusive with for nearly a year. It had always been quick and rough and rarely even in the bed. Fearing that he might not actually be able to get the word “yes” out, Rhys nodded and lowered himself to his back. He pulled his legs up and apart and watched as Finn reached out to expose his hole. And then Finn touched him and Rhys knew things would never be the same.

***

Finn stared at Rhys’ entrance, then reached out to run his thumb over it, needing to feel it without the lube. Rhys jumped at the contact and Finn looked up to make sure he was okay. The dark, raw passion staring back at him assured him he was good and the nearly purple head of Rhys’ leaking cock took away any lingering doubt. He tested the wrinkly skin a few more times, then applied some of the lube. He worked his fingers in tiny circles around the opening and every couple of seconds, he’d dip the tip of one finger inside. Rhys began pushing against his fingers so he eased one in until it got past the first muscle. Rhys moaned and Finn closed his eyes at the feeling of Rhys’ body clamping down on him. If it felt this tight on just his finger, how would he ever survive once his cock was all the way inside this beautiful man?

“Finn, please,” he heard Rhys say and his eyes shot up to see the other man clenching his teeth together. Even though Finn was the one lacking experience, he suddenly realized how much power he had and a thrill went through him. His insecurities faded to the background as he used his free hand to pull one of Rhys’ legs free of the death grip the man had on himself. He draped Rhys’ leg against his shoulder, then motioned to Rhys to do the same with his other leg.

“Tell me how it feels,” Finn whispered as he pulled his finger out, then pushed it back in.

“Good baby, so good. But I need more. Please.”

Finn smiled at the nearly pleading sound in Rhys’ tone. He worked a second finger in with the first and dragged them in and out in slow, tantalizing strokes, adding in a scissoring motion every once in a while that had Rhys squirming and moaning. Finn’s intent had been to prolong this as long as he could, but he realized his body wasn’t going to cooperate so he added a third finger.

“Rhys, I need you,” he said as he pulled out and lined up his cock to the pulsing hole. He looked up to make sure Rhys was ready, but the other man seemed incapable of words and managed only a sharp nod as his fingers clenched in the bedding.

Finn pressed forward, his eyes alternating between watching the tip of his cock disappear into Rhys’ body and looking up at Rhys to make sure he wasn’t hurting him. But Rhys’ head was pressed back, his eyes closed. With each push and pull motion that had him sinking further inside the hot channel, Rhys grunted.

“Rhys,” Finn said uncertainly as he stilled.

“Fuck, don’t stop!” Rhys cried out as he pushed his body down the bed trying to force Finn further inside. It was all Finn needed and he punched his hips forward and moaned when his balls slapped against Rhys’ ass. The combined heat and pressure on his cock was nearly too much and he couldn’t stop himself from pulling nearly all the way out and slamming back in again. Rhys’ legs pressed down on Finn’s shoulders as he began trying to lift himself to meet each thrust so Finn wrapped his arms around Finn’s thighs to keep their bodies close as he sawed relentlessly in and out of Rhys.

“It’s so good,” he heard Rhys say and he nearly faltered when those luminous eyes opened and gazed back at him as Finn hammered into his welcoming body. He’d wanted to take Rhys from the front so he could see his eyes as he came, but he hadn’t expected the overwhelming flood of emotion that would go through him. This strong, beautiful, sometimes crazy, always loyal man was letting Finn inside every part of him and it was nearly too much.

“Rhys,” he whispered as tears stung his eyes. He leaned over and joined their mouths as he continued his thrusting and Rhys opened to him instantly and greeted his tongue. Arms wrapped around his back and Rhys’ legs wrapped around his hips as he neared the end. He managed to get one of his hands between their hips and matched his strokes on the other man’s cock with the brutal rhythm his body had set. He hoped to God he wasn’t hurting Rhys with his thrusts, but he was too close to stop or slow. Pulling back from Rhys’ mouth, he dropped his forehead down against Rhys’ and gave up trying to keep his eyes open as the orgasm began to claim him. Two more hard jerks and he screamed in relief as his body let go and the seed shot from his pulsing cock. Rhys’ fingers closed around the back of Finn’s neck as he shouted his name, then shuddered and Finn felt his release coat his palm and splatter against their stomachs.

Finn’s skin tingled and his muscles released and he suddenly felt boneless. His hand was still stuck between their sweaty bodies as Finn let all of his weight sag onto the hard body beneath his. Rhys’ hot, heavy breath was against his neck and then there were light kisses along his shoulder as big hands closed around his ass and just held him there.

Rhys moaned at the feel of a slick tongue traveling up his cock before sucking gently on the flared head. He folded one arm under the back of his head so he could watch Finn go to town on his aching dick. Waking up with a very hot man wrapped around your body was one thing, but to have him worshipping your dick was a hundred times better. Even in his inexperience, Finn gave it his all. Just like last night.

Rhys had been fucked more times than he could count, had been the one doing the fucking even more often. But he’d never had something like last night happen. He’d never been in a place where sex became more than just a cock buried inside of him seeking release.

But last night had been a first because Finn hadn’t held anything back, especially from his eyes. He doubted Finn even realized that his eyes were a window to every emotion the other man experienced. Last night Rhys had seen the whole range including fear, curiosity, confidence, power and awe. But it was seeing himself through Finn’s eyes that had messed with his head and kept him up most of the night even as Finn lay wrapped around him, one leg thrown over Rhys’ leg, another arm draped across his chest.

Finn had taken something as simple as sex and turned it into something more. For the first time in his life, Rhys had felt precious, wanted…needed. It was something Rhys couldn’t imagine going without ever again, but that was exactly what would happen. He needed to remember that whatever he’d seen in Finn last night had been because it was his first time and he’d been overcome with the new sensations bombarding his body, not because he was feeling something for Rhys that he’d only felt for one other man - continued to feel for that man, Rhys reminded himself. Knowing that had been the only thing that kept Rhys from being the first man to have the pleasure of burying himself deep inside Finn’s perfect body. It was something Finn should give to the man he loved, not the man who was a convenient placeholder.

Rhys pushed all thoughts from his head when Finn stopped torturing him and finally sucked him deep into his mouth. The younger man immediately gagged and pulled off, then gave Rhys a sheepish smile as he tried again. God, he really was beautiful, Rhys thought to himself as he let his fingers brush over Finn’s soft hair. Finn increased the pressure of his sucking as he worked his mouth up and down Rhys’ length and Rhys fought the urge to thrust into his mouth.

Finn had pushed the comforter completely aside when he sought out Rhys’ dick so Rhys had an unobstructed view of the tight, smooth ass that was humping into the bedsheets. In fact, it was close enough to reach so Rhys took his hand from Finn’s hair and stroked it over the soft skin, allowing the tip of his finger to disappear into the crease.

Finn moaned and Rhys grunted at the sensation that assaulted his dick. This time he couldn’t stop himself from fucking into Finn’s mouth and he felt Finn relax his jaw and throat so he could take him deeper.

Rhys used his own saliva to coat the tip of his finger before sliding it back between the globes of Finn’s ass and finding his opening. Another moan from Finn as he began sucking Rhys in earnest. Finn’s hand disappeared under his own hips to stroke himself as he pumped up against Rhys’ finger and Rhys eventually gave him what he wanted and pushed the tip inside. It was enough to finish Finn and Rhys at nearly the same time.

Rhys watched as his come spilled from Finn’s lips as he tried to swallow it all down. Rhys dragged him up for a kiss and licked the fluid from around his mouth before plunging his tongue inside. As their orgasms subsided and their bodies melted together, Finn pulled back and said with a cheeky smile, “You taste better.”

***

Callan felt cold seep through his body as he watched Finn and Rhys laugh over something and then Rhys was spraying Finn with the water hose. He’d guessed the men had been out checking on the herd and were in the process of rinsing the sweat off their horses when they got into their little water fight. From their position, they couldn’t see Callan through the barn so he had an unfettered view of their interaction and knew instantly that things had changed between the two men who’d been ready to come to blows just yesterday. They weren’t being obviously overt, but a stolen touch, a sly smile, a heated stare – gestures only two people who’d been intimate with one another would share when they thought no one was watching.

He’d known it would happen at some point, but he still wasn’t prepared for the keening loss that went through him. And the worst part was because he felt the loss of both men, not just one. Finn leaving him and moving on had been a foregone conclusion, but the man who gave Finn what he needed, deserved, was always some faceless individual in a world that didn’t exist beyond Callan’s bleak future. But to have that man be Rhys, a man he himself was feeling some invisible pull towards, was a cruel twist of fate. Karma he supposed – punishment for all the lies he’d told so he wouldn’t have to spend the rest of his life watching Finn move on without him. And fucking hell if that wasn’t exactly what was happening now.

“Callan?” he heard his aunt call from behind him. Her voice was high and filled with fear. He swung around and saw her hurrying down the barn aisle towards him, her hands twisting around each other.

“Are you all right?” he asked when he reached her. He heard footsteps and hooves behind him.

“It’s your father – I can’t find him,” she cried. “He was taking a nap and I went to sit outside on the porch for just a few minutes and I must have nodded off,” she said shakily.

He felt Finn’s presence at his elbow and knew Rhys was likely close too.

“I woke up and went to check on him and he wasn’t in bed. I can’t find him anywhere!”

“It’s okay, we’ll find him,” he said as he pulled her into his arms.

He turned to see that Finn and Rhys were already re-saddling their mounts. He turned back to Dolly and said, “Can you go back to the house and wait for him in case he gets back. Call my cell if he does. You have Finn’s number too, right?” he asked.

She nodded, tears welling in her eyes. “It’s so hot already, Callan. He wouldn’t have thought to take any water with him,” she said in a strangled voice.

Fear went through Callan and he forced himself to stay calm as he ushered Dolly back towards the house. By the time he got back to the barn, Finn and Rhys had their horses saddled and Finn was pulling Callan’s black gelding from the stall.

“Finn, you take the south pasture. Rhys, can you check around the lake? He and my mother liked to go there and he doesn’t remember that it’s been filled in. I’ll head up towards the woods on the north side of the house,” he said as he tightened his horse’s girth.

“Got it,” Finn said. “He’ll be okay, Cal,” Finn reassured him and then the man was pulling him into his arms for a swift hug. Callan’s anxiety overrode his common sense and he wrapped one arm around Finn’s shoulders, the other around his waist and buried his face into the man’s shoulder. It lasted only a few seconds, but when he looked up, he saw Rhys watching him from where he stood next to his own horse and West. The knowing, piteous look in his eyes had Callan releasing Finn and grabbing his horse’s bridle and leading him from the barn without another word.

***

Callan held back the bile that rose in his throat as he checked his watch again. Forty-five minutes. His father had disappeared less than an hour ago, but it felt like a lifetime. The heat was sweltering and the terrain was rough and unforgiving and Callan knew that one wrong step could cost his father his life. Rattlesnakes weren’t unheard of in the area and he’d even seen bear scat earlier this week near the tree line that bordered the valley the herd spent most of their time in. Guilt gnawed at Callan for the many times he’d wished he didn’t have to deal with his father and the illness that was stealing him away piece by piece. The man he knew was disappearing before his very eyes, but every once in a while he got a glimpse of the proud, strong man who had taught him the value of a hard day’s work when he was a little boy. The one who’d shown him how to stand up to the bigger kids that picked on him and even stick up for the ones who couldn’t fight for themselves.

Tears stung Callan’s eyes and he reached for his phone, ready to dial the police. He knew no one from town would help put together a search party, but he had a friend who worked for the State Patrol. It would take time to get more bodies out to help, but it was something. As he went to dial, his phone rang and a knot of fear went through him at the sight of Rhys’ number.

“I got him Callan,” he heard Rhys say the second he answered. “He’s okay,” he quickly added and Callan pulled his horse to a stop and clapped a hand over his eyes to stem the grateful tears that threatened to fall.

“Where are you?” he managed to ask

“Other side of the lake,” he said. “He’s pretty confused and he won’t get up on the horse with me so I’m gonna find a place in the shade for us to wait near the access road. You think your aunt can get the truck down here? She’s probably closest and the sooner we get him out of the heat, the better.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll call her,” Callan said quickly. “Thank you, Rhys,” he managed to get out. “Thank you.” He ended the call before Rhys could hear the sob that had been stuck in his throat erupt. He managed to turn his horse around and head back towards the ranch. It took him a while to get his emotions under control, but he finally succeeded in getting his aunt on the phone and gave the relieved woman instructions on where to meet Rhys. He phoned Finn next, though he kept his words brief and clipped so that Finn wouldn’t pick up on the distress that was coursing through him.

By the time he made it back to the ranch, his father was resting in the den and Dolly was coercing him into his second glass of ice water. Callan dropped a hand to Carter’s shoulder and said, “You okay, pops?”

“Can’t find the game,” Carter muttered as he looked at the remote in confusion.

“Football season doesn’t start for a while yet. How about some baseball?” Callan asked as he took the remote and switched the channel. His father looked okay, though his skin was slightly burned from the sun. Luckily he’d been dressed in long sleeves and khaki pants so little of his skin had been exposed.

“Have some more water,” Dolly said as she handed him the glass.

“Want some beer,” Carter grumbled.

“Tell you what. You finish the whole glass of water, I’ll get you a beer, okay?” Dolly said. Callan felt sadness go through him because he knew that his father would forget the little white lie Dolly had told him long before he even finished the water.

He led Dolly outside the door and said, “Maybe we should take him to the ER.”

Dolly shook her head. “I think that will upset him more. My friend Evelyn’s on her way over. She’s a nurse – retired. She said she’d check him out and then we can see if he should go in.”

Callan nodded, then saw the tears brimming in Dolly’s eyes.

“Callan, I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “I was just so tired…”

Callan pulled her into his arms and kissed the top her head. “It’s not your fault,” he soothed. “You take such good care of him, Aunt Dolly. I don’t know what I’d do without you,” he admitted.

Dolly settled, then pulled back and wiped at her eyes, a watery laugh escaping from her trembling mouth. “I’m just full of waterworks today,” she said with a chuckle. “Poor Rhys probably had to go change his shirt after I got done hugging him.”

Callan stiffened at the mention of Rhys and he hoped his aunt didn’t notice. “I need to get my horse down to the barn and cool him off. You gonna be okay here?” he asked. She nodded, then followed him to the front door. “Call me if you need me,” he said.

“I will honey,” she said as she kissed his cheek. He left the house and untied his horse from the porch railing and led the sweaty animal down to the barn. As much as he owed Rhys a personal thank you, he really hoped he and Finn weren’t around because he wasn’t sure how much more drama he could take today. And it wasn’t even fucking noon yet.

***

Rhys moaned as Finn straddled him and languidly kissed him, his sleek tongue expertly teasing every surface before twining with his tongue. He automatically put his hands on Finn’s waist and began rocking their bodies together as Finn continued his sensuous torture.

The day’s long events had caught up with both of them by the time they’d made it back to the house and thrown together a quick dinner. The plan had been to finish off the sandwiches while sacked out in front of the TV watching one of the many action movies Finn had in his DVD collection, but they hadn’t made it past the first gunfight before Finn was shoving their plates aside and climbing into Rhys’ lap.

Callan had disappeared shortly after he’d returned from his search for his father. He’d stayed long enough to wash down his horse, then he’d gotten in the truck and just left. Finn had called him several times, but there’d been no answer. So when the headlights flashed through the window, both he and Finn hesitated. Rhys could tell Finn wanted to say something, but was too afraid to bring it up.

“You should go check on him,” Rhys said.

Finn shook his head, but the indecision lingered and Rhys couldn’t help but kiss him hard. It was strange, but he knew it would bother him more if Finn was willing to dismiss Callan in favor of him. “Go. Make sure he’s okay,” Rhys said as he smacked Finn on the ass and lurched up, forcing the other man to his feet.