First Bite (Darkwood Manor Series) (4 page)

“You can't tell me you don’t feel what I’m feeling. I don’t know what it is about you, but I want you no matter what.” I shudder. There is more that I want. I want to drain him.

“I want you…too much,” I whisper, and his arms tighten around me. I turn my head to the side, and think about Nathan and his words to me a little bit ago. His voice is clear in my head, “you told me you would never kill a human like your dad. You said you don’t want to be a monster like him.”

I will try like hell not to become like him. I am not a monster.

Chapter Four
Muse

I told Nathan to meet me outside after school, because I wanted to talk to him before Jason and Kenny join us. I am out here first waiting for my best friend. I haven’t told him that I kissed Jason again last night.

“I heard you started singing again,” Nathan's voice says behind me, and I look over my shoulder at him. He narrows his eyes at me.

“Maybe,” I say, and he moves past me to sit down.

“You know, after I left you last night I figured you would fall asleep, not serenade Jason.” I smile and look down. I should’ve known Nathan would have found out.

“Jason told you?” I ask.

“Yes, he said you had an amazing voice, and your song was heart breaking.” I look up at my best friend, who has been my rock this whole time.

“I wasn’t trying to serenade him; I didn’t even know he was there.” I look away and I can feel the guilt on my face.

“There is more. You aren’t telling me everything,” he says as if he can read my mind.

I bite my bottom lip as I look back at him. “We kissed again.”

Nathan narrows his eyes. “Have you lost your flippen mind?”

I try not to smile, I know it will just make him madder, but I fail. A smile pulls at my lips, as he narrows his eyes more at me.

“Don't smile. You can't control yourself around him. You have dreams about killing him, and drinking his blood.” Nathan rubs his temples, and I know he is stressed out. I have seen him do this so many times. “Why would you kiss him again? Last night when I came to you, I thought you were going to lose it. I saw your eyes. You wanted to kill him.” He keeps his fingers circling his temples.

“I know. But I feel something with him,” I say, and Nathan narrows his eyes at me. “Besides me craving his blood, he makes me feel like I can have someone love me.” I smile thinking about Jason, and how he looks at me as if I am the only girl in the world.

“Victoria, what if you hurt him? Don't you want him safe?” he reaches and grabs my hand. “And you do have someone that loves you. I love you,” Nathan chuckles lightly. “You are the only girl I will ever love.” I smile at him, and then look away from him as I hear someone clearing their throat.

Jason and Kenny are standing there. I beam up at him. “What are you doing out here?” I ask, and Jason winks at me.

“I guess I can't stay away from a pretty girl,” he says, and I giggle. Jason looks down at my and Nathan’s hands, still entwined.

I look around, and smile back at him. “I don’t see a pretty girl, do you Nathan?”

He gives me a look that tells me we will talk later, and takes his hand away from mine. He turns around. “Hey,” he says sounding like he is mad. Jason and Kenny raise their eyebrows at Nathan.

“Maybe we should leave them, Jason.” Kenny says, and looks at me. I shake my head, I want Jason here.

“How about Jason and I leave,” I stand up, and I can feel Nathan's heated gaze on me. “I'm sure he would rather spend some time with you Kenny.”

“Victoria, I don’t think that is a good idea. Maybe you should stay here,” Nathan says, and I glance at him. Jason is standing so close to me again, his amazing scent is swirling around me again, and I can barely think straight.

I shake my head and can feel my ponytail moving. “No, I want to talk to Jason…alone.” I look at Nathan and he is glaring at me. We fight like a brother and sister. Always have, and probably always will.

“Victoria—” I put up my hand to stop him from talking. I know he is worried at me being alone with Jason, and a part of me is worried too.

“I'm better,” I say, and for some reason I am. I still want to drink Jason's blood, but I think I can control it. “Jason would you like to escort me to the lake?” I turn my eyes to him, and he grins.

“It would be my pleasure,” Jason says and holds his hand out for me. I walk to him and smile as I take his hand.

We don’t say anything when we walk to the lake, and when we get there we aren’t alone. Some of the girls are there laughing, they look at us when we walk up. “Follow me. I know a place where we can be alone.” I nod, but glance at the girls again. They are glaring at me, so I just grin as we walk away.

Jason walks me to a rocky beach shrouded in the darkness of the thick woods surrounding us. The woods surrounding the manor almost meet the lake here. If something happened it would be bad, and I don’t know if I could stop myself from hurting him.

“So, I met your mother, do you know where your father is?” I recoil away from him, and remember my father and what he did. “I'm sorry. I don’t want to hurt you.”

I close my eyes, and shake my head.

“My father is a monster. He is evil and doesn’t care about me or my mother. Only thing he cares about is himself.” I can feel myself growing angry thinking about how selfish he was, after he attacked that man. My mother told him to leave if he was going to kill, and he left. I haven’t seen or heard from him since.

I feel strong arms wrap around me, and I lay my head on Jason’s chest. He smells like home to me, and I can feel my fangs aching to be released again. I force them back up, and look up at him. I can see so much pain in his bright green eyes, and I hold him tighter to me.

I’m not sure how long we stand here holding each other not speaking; I just listen to his steady heartbeat. I stare out on the lake thinking about my father, and about the pain Jason feels for losing his father.

“Victoria, I need to tell you something.” The tone in his voice has me looking up at him.

“Jason you can tell me anything.” A sweet smile forms on his face.

He moves one hand away from my waist to my face. “I can't stop thinking about you. You are the first and last thought I have. I dream of you and I can't get your smell out of my head. When I’m not around you, I feel lost.” I catch my breath. He is enchanted with me.

“Jason…” I start but he shakes his head to stop me from speaking.

“No let me finish, or I will lose my nerve. I’ve had girlfriends, and I thought I loved one before. But I was wrong. It wasn’t love…it was a crush. My mom told me that when I love someone, I would feel it here.” He takes his hand away from my cheek and taps his chest above his heart. “And here.” He touches his forehead. “Victoria, I can feel myself falling for you. I just hope I don’t crash and burn.”

I can feel my heart dropping. No one besides Nathan has told me he loves me. To have Jason falling for me scares the crap out of me. I don’t want to hurt him, and I have a feeling him finding out his girlfriend is a vampire will make him crash and burn.

Before I can say anything his lips are on mine. I groan. Once again his taste fills me, and I clench him closer. All that matters right now is him and me. I am highly aware of his hands sliding up the back of my shirt, and I moan in his mouth. Jason feels right to me, even if a part of me to wants bathe in his warm blood.

I mirror what he just did to me, but I put my hands up the front of his shirt. His abs are well defined under my curious hands, and it is his turn to moan in my mouth. I can feel my fangs starting to poke through my gums, and I slowly pull away. I know if he cuts is tongue in my mouth, I won't stop from drinking him.

I close my eyes, but keep a smile on my face. I will myself to get my breathing back to normal. “Jason you aren’t the only one falling,” I say.

Jason frames my face with his large hands. “Now would be the time to take that back, if not I will hold you to it,” he says, with a wicked grin on his face.

I bite my bottom lip, and his green eyes look at my lip. “You're right, this is the perfect time to take it back…but I won't.”

Jason laughs, and I catch his sweet breath in my nose. “Good. I would go crazy if I couldn’t have you.” I smile, but move away from him. Walking to the shore I sit on a large rock so my pants don’t get wet.

“Victoria, are you alright?” Worry is plain in Jason voice, and I nod.

I look over my shoulder at him, and his black curly hair is a little messy from our kiss. His normally bright green eyes seem a little darker. “Yeah, I’m okay,” I say and he moves closer to me.

“You know I haven’t been able to get your sad song out of my head. Now you can write sappy love songs, and I can be your muse.” He says and I laugh. Jason will make the perfect muse.

I turn around to look at him. His bright green eyes are sparkling at me. “I don’t know if I can write a sappy love song.”

A smile spreads across his face. “I guess I will have to show you sappy,” he says as he rubs the tip of his nose on mine. I giggle, and the sound is new to me. I have never giggled before, and I shake my head.

“How do you plan on being sappy?” I ask and he winks at me.

“Now sweetheart, that is a surprise. You will see in good time, my beautiful pink haired girlfriend.” I can feel my ear perk up when he said girlfriend.

“Girlfriend?” I say, and I can hear the shakiness in my own voice.

“Victoria I would go mad if I saw you with anyone else. When I first saw you running and leaping into Nathan’s arms, I wanted to beat the crap out of him. Then you guys acted like you were a couple, and I saw red. I don’t want anyone but you, and I hope you feel the same.” Jason’s smile drops a little, and I bring my hands to his face.

“Jason I don’t want anyone but you. You make me feel—” I want to say human, but I don’t know how he will take me being a vampire. “Alive,” I say then kiss his lips lightly.

“We should go back to the manor.” His voice is a little deep than it was a few minutes ago, and I tremble. I need to get to my room, to my blood, and I need to call my mother. I am running dangerously low on my “take-out” bags.

“We should,” I say, and he grins at me.

“Meet me out here tonight.” I don’t have to think about it this time I just nod my head. I know I really shouldn’t but he isn’t the only one that can’t stay away. I’m drawn to him like a moth to a flame.

I wrap my arms around him and hug him tightly to me. “Yes.”

Chapter Five
The Dream

When we get back to the manor, Nathan and Kenny are waiting for us. Kenny smiles as we approach, but my eyes go to Nathan. His face is showing annoyance and betrayal. Then he looks at mine and Jason’s connected hands.

“Jason and Kenny, can I have some alone time with my best friend?” I keep my eyes on Nathan, but I feel my hand being raised. I look at Jason, and he gently kisses my hand.

“Of course. I will see you later sweetheart.” I can feel my face heat up when he winks at me. Later can’t come soon enough.

When Nathan and I are alone, he scowls at me. “I think you have lost your mind. I should call your mother and tell her to lock you up.”

My happy glow from Jason instantly vanishes. “Nathan I like him. I really like him.”

He shakes his head. “You are drawn to him, and you don’t even know him.” I can feel tears threatening to break free, and I quickly close my eyes. I move past him to the door, and slowly open my eyes. He puts his hand on my shoulder to stop me from going inside. “Victoria, you know what could happen if you’re around him. You should look at yourself. You are so pale and your pupils are huge. I bet your gums ache from your fangs wanting to break free.”

Nathan knows me better than anyone ever has; I gradually turn around to face him. “I can’t stay away from him. He makes me feel human, like I’m not a freaking monster. I want to be with him even if it kills me in the long run.”

Nathan shakes his head. “You are being selfish.”

I nod. I know I am, but Jason wants me too. “I need to go, but I don’t want you to be mad at me. Please? Nathan you are my best friend, and I need you to stand by me.”

His scowl deepens, and then he shakes his head. “No, I am really mad. Go and drink your take-out bags.”

Nathan moves past me and opens the front door. He doesn’t say anything else as he walks away. There is an ache in my heart like my best friend just staked me.

In my room I check my phone and see that I have a missed call and a text message from my mom.

Victoria, I know you are freaking out about that boy. I will tell you what you need to know on Sunday. I love and miss you. ~Mom

I grab a blood bag and frown. I only have three more left to last me two more days. At the rate I am drinking them, I will run out tomorrow. I whimper thinking about what I will do. Before, when we were out it wasn’t a problem, but now that I am craving someone, it is.

I don’t want to hurt or attack Jason, or anyone else. I don’t want to be a monster. I move to my bed and lay down. I want to try and rest before I see Jason again. I need to gain control of my hunger. I sluggishly close my eyes, and will myself to fall asleep.

When I was a kid my dad would bring me to our special place. It was a dark brown wood cabin in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by thick woods, and a large deep blue lake. That is where I am. I know I am dreaming because I can see the shimmering glow I normally see when my father visits me in my dreams. He hasn’t done this in a while, and I wonder why he wants to now.

Every time I fall asleep I wonder if I will see him. I have nearly given up on him showing himself to me. I can’t dreamscape because I’m not strong enough yet.

“Victoria Marie,” my father’s familiar voice says. He has always called me that, ever since I could remember. “You have grown to a beautiful young woman…besides your pink hair.” I smile, and turn to face my scowling father.

I did my hair like this because I knew mother wouldn’t like it. I love it, but he would think it was childish.

“You don’t have a say what you like and don’t like about me. Why did you bring me here, father?”