Fly on the Wall (25 page)

Tugging heavily on her knob and plunging into her with his tongue over and over, Derek looked like an infant sucking for the gift of life. He had a Doctorate in Pussyology and gave her another fifteen minutes of professional treatment before surfacing. He crept up her torso and repositioned their bodies. She was now atop him, with the black satin sheet to his back.

“Put me in,” he said.

Toni hesitated, but after several long sighs, couldn't hold it. “Derek, I don't expect you to want me tomorrow,” she paused, “but I need you to pretend that you love me tonight.” She added, “Don't fuck me.” She swallowed hard. “I mean, I know that that's what you probably want to do, but just please don't treat me like it.”

She was desperate for the warm feeling she yearned for so long. She wanted it tonight, even if it was just make-believe. “Don't fuck me.” Tears were holding on to the corners of her eyes.

He stared into her face. “That wasn't my intention.” His lips met hers gently. “Put me inside and let me prove it.”

Toni trembled feverishly as she reached down and affixed his shovel to the surface of her patch of moistened earth. All he had to do was muster up the energy to dig . . . and dig he did. With the sensitivity of a true gentleman, he hollowed out her tunnel slowly. She studied his facial expression and searched for the face of a man who was just glad for pussy, any pussy, but the look was absent.

In his arms, she felt like a rose petal that fell from the rose of an arrangement delivered to a queen. He was gentle, unhurried, and affectionate. He appreciated her body. Though he was eager to be with her, his intentions were never to make her feel as though that was all she was worth. Something brought this beautiful, caring, frail woman into his arms, and he felt the need to value her.

Now sweaty, moaning, biting his lips, and unable to control the way his eyes kept floating upward, Derek admitted, “I've thought about this a lot.”

“Me too.” She looked into his face. “I, I—” She stopped in mid-sentence, but convinced herself that life was too short not to say what was on her mind . . . even if it wasn't right. “I think about
you
all the time.”

“So do I,” he panted.

“Thank you for being gentle with me.” Her tears escaped.

His hands clenched her buttocks and he slowly filled her from the bottom up. “You don't ever have to tell me what to do. I know how to treat a lady.” He enjoyed the way her breasts wiggled and jiggled each time she fell onto him.

“Good,” she said.

He beckoned her for a kiss. “Now come here.” Together they believed that they were touching heaven, but it was hell that was reaching out to them all along. Derek moaned, “Stay with me tonight.” At that very moment, a deafening sound filled the air, followed by pieces of shattered glass from the window above the bed. Before either of them could respond, there was nothing, or no one, to respond to.

“D
id I wake you up?” I said as she opened the door with eyes halfway closed.

“Don't worry about it,” Paige groaned and assured me while her wine-colored satin robe hung half open. “Come in.”

“I thought you'd still be up.” After what happened at the dance, I had to see her. I felt awful. I dropped Will off and was headed home when the memory of Angela on her knees in front of me slapped me in the face. I made a U-turn straight out of the Hollywood movies and called her when I was two minutes away.

I fought with telling her about the incident, and decided that if I couldn't tell her, the least I could do was provide comfort for the unknown act that I didn't try hard enough to stop. “If you were already in bed, I'll just leave.”

“It's not a problem, Theo.” She closed the door as I entered, and stared into my face. “Are you all right?” It was as if she were glaring into my very essence.

“Yeah.” I looked away. “Just a little tired, that's all.”

She moved closer to me. “Are you sure?”

Could she smell my cheating blood? What was giving me away? “I'm fine,” I lied with a smile, but I couldn't look at her. “I just wanted to see you.” To mask my guilt, I brushed my hand over the switch and turned out the lights.

She laughed. “If you want to see me, you can't do that in the dark.”

“I'm a blind man tonight. Seeing, to me, is through touch, so I'll just have to feel you.” I grabbed her hand and followed her to the bedroom.

“Where did you park?” she asked. We were now standing in her bedroom. “How was the dance?”

“The dance?” I thought about what would happen if I were upfront and what would happen if I weren't. I slid my arms around her and pulled her toward me slowly. “You should've been there.”

“Me?” She smiled. “Why?”

“It would've changed my whole night.” That was the truth. If she were at the dance, there would've been no way to get into half of the things I did. “I really wish you would've been there.”

“We'll have plenty of dances together after this little thing called graduation that's coming up.” She smiled and kissed my chest through my T-shirt.

“I hear you.” I held her.

“I'm sleepy. Are you staying?” she asked.

“Yeah.” I paused. “Yeah, I'm staying.”

Eventually, we made our way to the bed, talked, and then snuggled closely next to one another. With my secret nestled uncomfortably between us, I sprinkled her neck and upper back with kisses. My conscience kept me awake, and if she weren't sleepy, I would've made love to her. I probably still could've, but I hadn't even washed Angie's dried-up saliva off of me.

An hour into staring at the closet door, Paige's cellular phone started to ring. She moaned and ignored it, but seconds later, it was chiming again. She reached for it and flipped it open, “Yeah,” she said in a weary tone and went silent. “Yes.” She paused. “All right, all right, no. We're not together right now.” Her hand rushed to rub her eyes. “Yeah, we
were
together . . .” She continued. “Why?” She reached over and clicked on the lamp on the nightstand. “She's not there yet?” Paige looked at the clock then rolled over onto her back. “No.” She paused. “I don't know . . .” She was interrupted. “Now, you wait just one minute . . .” She sat up and raised her voice. “Marcus, don't yell at me and don't call me a liar because I—” She was upset. “Why?” She paused. “Why? Why in the hell are you yelling at me and asking
me
all of these questions?” She ran her fingers through her hair. “What? What? What did they say?” She froze. “When?” Paige jumped out of bed. “No, no, that can't be right.”

Right then, even though she was brown-skinned, Paige went pale, and the expression on her face went away. It looked as if she wanted to faint, vomit, and cuss someone out all in the same breath. “Oh my God . . . and they think it's her? Why would they think that?” She leaned against the wall. “Where?” She scrambled around the room, not sure of what she was looking for. “Where?” She got loud again. “No, I want to. I'll meet you there.” Tears took over her voice. “No, I'm coming. I'll meet you there.” She hung up.

“What's going on?” I asked as she dropped to the bed like a tattered rag doll. “Paige, are you all right?”

“It's her.” She cried and paused. “It's her. That's where she told me she was going. She was going to Cutler Ridge.”

“Who? Who went to Cutler Ridge?” I was confused. “What are you talking about?”

She wailed for a while and spoke a sentence of slow, slurred words that I couldn't comprehend. “I can't understand you, baby,” I said as I wiped the tears from her eyes. “What are you saying?”

She struggled to compose herself and managed to spill these words. “A woman was killed . . . they think it's Toni.”

“What?” I jumped up. “What happened?”

She started talking, and immediately I felt as though I was in a movie. Marcus had called from the back of a police cruiser on the way to Cutler Ridge, to a crime scene where a woman was murdered, and they suspected that it was his wife, Toni. Next, Paige and I were speeding down US-1. I followed the directions given to me by an officer because Marcus was too shaken up to tell us where he was.

During the entire ride, Paige continuously dialed Toni's cell phone number. Toni never picked up, and Paige grew angrier with each call because her voice mail was full. She couldn't leave a message to let her know how much trouble she was in.

The flashing red and blue lights from the sea of police cars surrounding it encompassed the pale yellow apartment complex. “This is it,” I said to Paige as we pulled up, hoping that it was all a mistake.

Within minutes of arriving and being repeatedly asked to stay behind the yellow police ribbon, Paige spotted Toni's husband. “Marcus!” she yelled. He had his hands on his head and was being escorted out of the complex by two officers. “Marcus!” Paige yelled again. However, he didn't acknowledge her, or anyone, for that matter. He seemed in a state of shock.

“Where is she?” Paige frantically dashed under the police line, and before the officers could catch her, she had reached him. “Where? What? Tell me . . . tell me.”

When he was able to speak, he confirmed her worst fears. The body in the apartment was that of her best friend. Paige stared at Marcus in disbelief and made him repeat the sad truth, and then fell onto him.

The two of them held onto one another, and I was told that I couldn't enter the restricted area. During my “standing around,” I overheard three police officers having a conversation. Apparently, Toni was creeping on Marcus with a dude that lived in the apartment complex. The dude had a restraining order out on his ex-girlfriend. The ex-girl was a psycho, and police had been called to the apartment several times in the last few months. Whenever they were called, it was because he had company over and she was bitter. The ex would call and call and then wait outside to confront the man and the new girl, one time even waiting until the next morning. Toni and the dude were having sex when the deranged ex threw a concrete block through the window above his bed. It landed on Toni's head, killing her immediately.

We didn't leave for Paige's place until the coroner's van came and Toni's body was removed from the bed, which became her final resting place. They rolled her by us in a body bag atop a tall stretcher, covered with a burgundy cloth. Paige never gave up on her friend. She continued to place calls to her. She continued to receive no answer, her voice mail was full, and she still couldn't get her message to Toni.

 

 

The week went by at the speed of lightning. Paige took the entire week off from school. She spent her days with Marcus and the twins. However, at night, she wanted me by her side, even if I had to beg, steal, or kill to pull it off. When we were together, she didn't talk about Toni. I think that after being at Marcus' house and around Toni's family and children from nine in the morning until nine at night, when she was home, she tried to pretend that her life was somewhat normal, like Toni was still just a phone call away.

I attended the funeral, but sat in the back of the church. I could only watch as the woman I loved needed a man beside her. Marcus' older brother, I care not to know his name, comforted Paige. I tried not to be jealous, but he wasn't an ugly dude. He was around forty, wavy black hair, light-skinned, tall, and looked like he used the hell out of his gym membership. I heard through the grapevine that he was a martial arts instructor, but I didn't give a fuck. I had seen all of Jackie Chan's movies. I knew the moves too.

Yeah, I was hatin' on the brotha. It made me sick to my stomach to see her walk into the church with the other family members with him clutching her hand, and her leaning on him all through the service. He was wiping her tears away, and during the parting view, he had to hold her around the waist when she nearly fainted. I couldn't even get close to her.

Several news crews were across the street from the church. Ever since it happened, the story was covered extensively:
Married Woman Killed While in Bed with Her Lover, by His Former Girlfriend
. They couldn't dream up a better story than that. The reporters were lined up across the street from the church parking lot. A few of them walked onto the church grounds when they saw me and had the audacity to ask me questions about my choice, college or the NBA, as I walked to the Mazda. I was just the basketball boy to them. They didn't care that I knew Toni. A story was just a story to them. It didn't matter where they got it. I gave them a blank stare and jumped into my car. I didn't go to the gravesite. I just couldn't stand to see anymore of the Paige and Bruce Lee show.

I didn't hear from her until close to midnight. I had no reason to be upset with her but I was, so I pretended that she had woken me up when she called. As selfish as this might sound, I was hungry for her to pay more attention to me. Everything lately was Marcus, Kevin, Devin, and now, Marcus' brother. Tonight would be her first without me since the ordeal. Had she asked me over I would've jumped at it, but she didn't.

“Sorry, go back to bed,” she said and hung up.

Two days later, her first day back at school, I made it to my seat in her classroom right as the bell rang. My intentions were to be late, but my feet were anxious about getting there. Even
they
wanted to be near her. She was wearing a black dress. Even in mourning she was sexy. Her smile was back, and she looked somewhat back to life. She thanked the class for all of the well wishes, cards, and phone calls over the past week, and took it easy on us by talking about her friendship with Toni for the entire period.

The bell rang and she dismissed us and began to gather her things. Angie walked over to my desk.

“Theo, what are you doing after school?”

“Why?” I looked past her at Paige; I hoped she wasn't listening. “What's up?”

“My dad is away on business until Wednesday. Wanna come over?”

“I'm meeting with the coach from Southern Kentucky State.” It was the truth.

She was persistent. “What about after that?”

I tried to keep my voice down. “Angie, I'm sorry about what happened.”

“It's cool. At first I was freaked out about getting caught,” she smiled, “but I still want to finish.”

“I don't want you to.” By then the classroom was almost empty and anything not said in an extreme whisper would be heard. “Look, Angie.” I paused. “I'm seeing someone.”

Angie looked upset. “Who?”

“Why should that matter?”

“Because obviously she isn't doing something right,” she said in a whisper.

I shook my head and stood up. “She has nothing to do with what happened. That was all my fault.”

“Theo.” Angie was embarrassed. “You let me su—”

“Mr. Lakewood, were you late to class today?” Paige asked from across the room.

I was relieved. “Yes,” I lied, “but can I get a break? I'm having a meeting with a college coach today.”

“There's no such thing as a break between you and me.” She smiled. “The coach will have to wait.” She turned her attention to Angie. “Were you late, too, Angela?”

“No,” Angie said. “We were just talking about something that's going on later.” Angie turned back to me and tried to be nice. “Give me your cell number. We'll talk later.”

I watched Paige cross her arms over her chest and wait on a response from me.