For Life (26 page)
I catch her gaze and hold it. “I always want to be honest with you, Chloe. And I’m sorry if you felt left out or betrayed. I didn’t want you to find out like that. Neither of us did.”
Her eyes fill with tears and her lip trembles, but she doesn’t speak.
“We were always going to tell you. I wasn’t trying to be sneaky.”
“It was just a shock,” she says, and this time her words are absolutely sincere. “It just felt like… like everything in the world was different all of a sudden. Uncertain.”
I want to hug her, but I hold myself back. Instead I reach over and take her hand in mine. “I’m sorry, sweetie.”
She doesn’t quite hold my hand, but she doesn’t pull away from me, either, which is shocking. After a moment I squeeze her fingers and let go, surprised at the lump in my throat.
“I have homework, too,” she says, rising slowly from the couch. “I guess I’ll go do that.”
Cassie
Grady watches me, not moving, until he hears Chloe’s door close, and then he moves to the sofa, twining his fingers in mine as he leans in for a kiss.
I melt into him, relieved. “So that wasn’t awful.”
“No,” he murmurs. “Not awful at all.” He rubs his knuckle across the apple of my cheek and my tension starts to ease.
“When did you get to be so good at laying down the law?”
He laughs. “About the first time I had them both for the weekend and Chloe challenged me about the kind of sandwich I made her.”
“Oh, that girl.” I sigh. “Is it wrong to say I’m happy it’s not just me?”
Grady grins. “She’s not easy, our Chlo.”
“Do you think she’s going to be okay, though?”
He hears the worry in my voice and cuddles me close. “She’ll be okay,” he reassures me. “You know how she is. She’s going to sulk around the house, probably write a song about how much she hates us for ruining her life, and then tomorrow she’ll be fine again.”
“I hope you’re right.”
“She’ll be fine, Cass, really.”
“If you say so.”
“I say so,” he says.
I scowl at him. “You’re a bit bossy, you know.”
“Yep.” He cups my face and whispers, “What can I do to put a smile back on this beautiful face tonight?”
Heat courses through my veins at the innuendo and I shift on the sofa, suddenly restless at his words.
“Did you have something in mind?” I breathe.
“As a matter of fact…” He brushes his lips across mine and I quiver at his touch. “I was thinking we might say goodnight to the kids and then lock ourselves in your room for a bit.”
I’m scandalized and draw back in shock. “You mean have sex with the kids here?”
He looks at me as if I’m insane. “I seem to remember a lot of sex taking place under the same roof as our kids when they were small.”
“But they were little! Now they’re… What if they, you know…” I blush and can’t get the words out.
“What if they hear you begging for my cock?” he teases.
My face flames. “Oh my God, that’s not even funny, Grady. I’m being serious!” I have a horrible vision of Chloe fuming in her room as theatrical moans rise through the floorboards beneath her.
“So am I.” He waggles his eyebrows at me. “Maybe I’ll have to gag you.”
“You’re shameless!” I flare, trying to shove him off me, but he holds my wrists fast.
“Cass, come on. This was going to come up at some point. We’re adults. Adults have sex. We’ll be discreet, but I’m not going to wait until both these kids are in college to make love to you under the same roof as them.”
“I didn’t mean
that
.”
“But you did mean not when they’re here.”
I did mean that. But I realize that’s absolutely ridiculous. I bite my lip and say nothing.
“Which means what, once every two or three weeks?” He shakes his head and tightens his grasp on my wrists. “Not happening. Fuck that.”
He’s right, but I’m annoyed about him being right on the heels of him being the calm, collected parent who just made everything better tonight.
“Are you sulking right now?” he asks, incredulous.
“No,” I lie, looking away.
“You are so cute when you try to lie to me,” he chuckles, capturing my mouth with his and kissing me until I’m gasping under him. “Can we go say goodnight to these kids now so I can get to work putting that smile on your face?”
My entire body sizzles. “Yes.”
* * * *
I light a few candles in my room and brush my hair while Grady says goodnight to the kids. I’ve already been up to say goodnight. We agreed that until we actually live together we’ll continue to do things as we’ve been doing them. Each of us has goodnight rituals with the kids that neither of us want to give up, and my bet is the kids - especially Chloe - don’t want to give them up, either.
When he returns to me and locks the door behind him a little shiver runs through me at the gleam in his eye.
“Candlelight, huh?”
“I figured we might want to see what we’re doing.”
“Got that right,” he growls, stalking toward me. “Why are you still dressed?”
His words send a lightning bolt of desire through me. I fumble with the buttons of my sweater while Grady snatches his shirt off over his head and hastily undoes his belt, his eyes never leaving me.
“Slow, baby,” he murmurs, even though he’s stripping off clothes as fast as he can. At his command I deliberately take my time with each button, then let the cardigan drop off my shoulders and slip to the floor.
Then Grady’s sitting on my bed, cock in his hand, watching me slide my jeans off my hips with dark intentions in his eyes, and I don’t want to move slowly, so I start to hurry again. Just like that he takes his hand off himself.
“No fair,” I protest.
“Slow,” he reminds me, and I caress myself as I pull my clothing off my body, nice and slow like he wants.
“Better.” He’s touching himself again, and I am so distracted by the sight of his hand wrapped around his straining shaft, the gleam of pre-cum oozing from the tip of his erection, that I stop moving altogether. My mouth is dry, but it starts to water when I anticipate the salty taste of that first little drop. I lick my lips as I stare at his busy hand, my fingers hooked in the sides of my panties.
“You can have a taste as soon as you’re naked,” he teases. “Just as long as you don’t rush it.”
I sigh in frustration and bend from the waist as I turn and remove my last article of clothing the way I know he wants me to: ass facing him, so he can watch. Sure enough, I’m rewarded by a soft groan from behind me as my underwear slithers past my ankles. When I turn to look at Grady his eyes are hooded with desire for me, and I crawl up the foot of the bed, between his thighs, my butt in the air.
“If you really want to put a smile on my face,” I purr, “you’ll let me take over.”
He grins and folds his hands behind his head as I dip my mouth to his inner thigh. I trail a line of kisses up to his groin, stopping just short of the crease of his leg, then repeat the same kisses on the other thigh. He squirms below me as the tip of my tongue makes contact with his balls. And then I’m savoring the musky smell of him as I suck one into my mouth and follow suit with the other. I tease him then, nibbling the underside of his shaft, swirling just below the head of his cock with my wet tongue, tasting the slit.
“Swing those legs around my neck,” he says hoarsely, and I glance up from between his thighs to see the hungriest look on his face. An answering chord of desire rings through me as I straddle him.
I’ve always thought of this indelicate position as the purview of younger people. When Grady and I were in college we did it, of course. I remember eating lunch with Ariel and some of my other friends after Grady had spent the weekend, and when she asked me slyly how we spent our time I bit my pretzels into the shape of a six and a nine and slid them together in the middle of the table, eliciting peals of laughter from my college girlfriends.
But when Grady squeezes my hips and covers me with his mouth, I realize he’s chosen this position strategically - both as a means of keeping me distracted so I don’t think about making any noise and as a way of keeping my mouth busy so I can’t. I moan softly around his hard flesh as he feeds on me, his tongue working me in different, wonderful ways from this angle. I try to hover, but he presses my full weight on top of him, pinning me to him, so I’m smothering him between my thighs and he’s lodged deep in my throat, as deep as I’ve ever taken him.
I suck him firm and fast, until he can’t keep still or quiet and groans against my wet flesh, his fingers biting into my hips. He’s thrusting against my face, begging for me to pick up the pace, so I do.
Despite our frantic movements, I can feel everything he’s doing to me, the flicks of his tongue against my clit, his breath hot on me, his mouth closing over my entire sex, savoring it. His fingers knead my ass as he devours me with a hum of satisfaction.
Grady’s heels dig into the mattress as he braces himself to thrust harder into my mouth, and I’m so overwhelmed by my impending orgasm that I don’t have time to worry if I can take him deeper - I just do. I suck furiously, my cheeks hollowing, my tongue making greedy noises that sound foreign and animal. My body is quivering and my mind goes a bit fuzzy as I gorge myself on him.
A tortured, feral sound escapes his throat as he fights back his climax, waiting for me to come first, and that’s all I need. Everything but the explosion of pleasure in my body disappears. I suck him to keep from screaming, and the second I start shuddering, he floods my mouth. I swallow every last drop.
Cassie
“Your board VP sucks,” Sandra declares over her sour grapefruit martini when I fill her in on everything that’s been happening at work. “That woman is just evil.”
“She kind of is,” I agree.
Sandra and I are having drinks after work at one of my favorite restaurants. The second I saw her I realized just how much I’ve missed her, and I’m thankful she reached out to me, because I’m not sure I could’ve been the bigger person.
“Do you know she e-mailed me to ask if I’d sent the file to the printer’s? First of all, I’m a professional, and I told them I was going to do it that day - which I did. Second of all, I’m giving them an amazing discount. They can suck it.”
“Thank you again for that.” I feel a bit guilty, even though I never asked her for a discounted rate. In light of our argument, though, it feels wrong.
We grumble a bit more about the Dragon Lady, and then Sandra stops and gets serious.
“I just want you to know, Cass - I’m really sorry for what I said to you the last time we got together. I had a long talk with Dr. Gaul about it, and I get that I was just projecting my own fears onto your situation. Grady is nothing like my ex, and I realize that.”
“He isn’t,” I agree. “And thank you. I will say it made me think. I still decided you were wrong. But I thought about it, anyway.”
“How are you guys?” she asks, her voice tentative.
“We’re really good. So good.” I nod. “We’re still not sure about when we’re going to make this official in terms of cohabitation, but that’s the plan, eventually.”
“I really am happy for you. You look great, by the way.” She makes a circling motion toward me. “Whatever’s happening there’s working for you.”
“It’s all the sex,” I say, trying not to be so smug. “Now I know why you’re so relaxed all the time.”
She barks a strange laugh and takes a big swallow of her drink.
“So no more trainer?”
She shakes her head vigorously. “He’s gone. You don’t want to know.”
“Sorry to hear that. But you have the new one.”
“He’s gone, too.”
“Already? What do you do to these poor men?”
Sandra shrugs. “The thing about guys that young is they’re a lot of work. A lot of responsibility. And I don’t want to have to raise my own lover. I think I might go just a little bit older next time around. I have my eye on one of my clients. He’s a lawyer, maybe thirty. Definitely not the settling down type.” Just then she remembers something. “Oh! And I never got the chance to tell you. Remember that guy I was saying I wanted to set you up with? From Pilates? Gavin, the British guy?” She waits for my nod of confirmation, then continues. “Well, I went over to talk to him, and I mentioned you, and do you know what he said to me? You would not
believe
this man!”
“What on earth did he say?”
“He said, ‘I can find my own dates, love, but if you decide to give out
your
number I’m interested.’ Can you believe him?’”
That gets a good giggle out of me. “A taste of your own medicine! I like him already. So, did you?”
“No!” She looks at me in horror. “Of course not! I told you, he’s got children, and his wife died. That’s too much baggage for me. No way.”
“He doesn’t sound like a man with a lot of baggage. He sounds like a man who’s ready to play the field again. How long ago did she die?”
“I’m not sure, and my field is closed to anyone with children. It just ain’t happening.”
“Suit yourself,” I shrug. “He sounds fun. You might be missing out on the hottest sex of your life.”
She rolls her eyes. “I strongly doubt it. Guys who are that cocky rarely turn out to be great lovers. Oh, and did I tell you every woman at the studio is in love with him?
So
annoying.”
“You did. Everyone except you, apparently, because you don’t like baggage.”
“I certainly do not. ‘Uncomplicated’ is my middle name. Baggage means it’s harder to untangle when I’m done.”
“Now I want to tell you to find your soulmate like you told me.”
“I’m not sure I even have a soul,” she laughs. “And if I did, I’d sell it to the devil for eternal youth.”
Typical Sandra. “It’s so good to have you back,” I grin, shaking my head. “I’ve missed you.”
* * * *
At dinner that night Caden is uncharacteristically quiet. Grady and I exchange glances as we watch Chloe try to engage him in conversation, but he gives her nothing at all. There are no smiles and no jokes, and he doesn’t even finish his plate of food. Usually he has seconds or even thirds. Coming from Chloe, this kind of behavior would be par for the course. Coming from Caden, it’s cause for immediate alarm.
Grady restrains me from following Caden upstairs after dinner. My son clears his plate and then trudges upstairs like he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.
“It could be anything,” Grady replies when I ask him what he thinks is wrong with our son. “It could be a girl, a bad test grade, some kind of rumor he heard… Who knows. Whatever it is, he doesn’t want to talk to either of us about it right now. Give him a day or two.”
But that worries me. “What if it’s something serious?”
“If it were serious,” Grady assures me, “Caden would tell us. We don’t have to worry so much about him. He’s an open book.”
“Do you think he’ll tell Chloe?”
“He might. But even if he doesn’t, Cass… I mean, he’s fourteen. He might not feel comfortable telling his sister what’s going on.”
“Do you think he needs therapy?” I gnaw my bottom lip and Grady grips my chin and forces me to look at him.
“I’d like to suggest that you might be overreacting just a bit, Cass.” I try to struggle from his grasp, but he holds me firm. “I don’t think we need to start him in therapy because of one off night. We don’t even know if it’s anything other than a teenage mood, but of course if we feel he needs it down the road then we’ll do it.”
“I’m just—”
“Shhh. Stop.” He silences me with a tender kiss. “You’re winding yourself up. I know you’re worried. And yes, he’s off, but give him his space tonight and see how he is in the morning, yeah?”
When I’m quiet, he prods, “He’s growing up, baby. You have to give him a little space.”
“I know he’s growing up. The other day in the car I noticed fuzz coming in above his lip, and I dropped the kids off and cried all the way to work.” Even thinking about it now, my eyes well with tears.
He presses his lips to my forehead but says nothing at all. I know he’s right that I have to let go a bit. But Caden’s my baby, and it’s hard. It takes me much longer than usual to fall asleep that night.
By the next morning Caden is better, if not fully himself again, and I realize maybe Grady’s right. He’s changing. He’s not a little boy, and it’s not easy being a teenager, even if you’re someone like Caden. By anyone’s standards he has a pretty easy life, and he’s never gotten himself into the kind of trouble a lot of other kids his age do. I’m still worried, but he talks a bit on our way to school and says goodbye like he always does. Even with whatever’s on his mind, he’s still more talkative than Chloe. I decide to leave it and just keep my eye on him.