Forever Lost: Becoming Elena - Book Two (3 page)

T
he wind rushing
through her hair was the only thing that alerted Elena she was running. She had no idea she’d pulled away from Dalton, no idea, she’d begun walking, let alone had started a full-out sprint.

But running she was. Her feet carried her farther and farther away, as she exited the park and found herself on a city street. Still, she didn’t stop. She wasn’t sure if she was running away from the image of her family leaving her or if she was running away from Dalton.

But either way, she had to go. She needed to outrun the feelings that were trying to consume her alive.

The truth was more than Elena could handle. Not that Elena was even her name. How had this happened? Memories flooded her as her mind unlocked with the torture she had suffered over the past five years.

Too much. It was all too much to bear.

She felt as if she were in a tunnel that kept tumbling as it pulled farther away from the atmosphere. She couldn’t stop the ride, didn’t know how to get off.

Running for minutes or hours, she had no idea, but Elena found herself in front of a theatre, and the cold was catching up to her as the misty air clung to her bare arms.

She slipped inside when someone came out, and she found a seat in the back, shivering while her mind continued rolling with the information she’d been given.

What was she supposed to do now?

Go home?

Was it even her home now? She had a brother — the little boy in her dreams, who had haunted her for so long, was her brother. It was hard to comprehend. She had a mother and a stepfather.

Looking up, she tried to focus on the big screen in front of her. There was a couple walking along on the beach, both of them looking sad as they turned and gazed at the water.

The man in the movie put his arms around the heroine and held tight as the sun set above the water. Elena wanted to scoff at them. That wasn’t the real world. In the her present universe, the man would lift the girl, toss her into the shark-infested waters, and laugh as he walked away.

That was life — that was reality.

There were no happily-ever-afters in Elena’s world.

Still, Elena couldn’t turn away from the show before her. She wanted to immerse herself into the screen and slip into the alternate universe where a happy ending was guaranteed.

But she wasn’t allowed to do that.

She was a fool. For so long Dalton had been her savior — had seemed to be her protector. But he’d kept her captive when he could have set her free. So why couldn’t she find it within herself to hate the man now?

She didn’t have an answer to that.

Elena had been locked in his arms, had cried out when he’d pleasured her, had woken up aching when he wasn’t there. She’d been submissive for him, leaned on him, and felt he was her protector.

She could practically feel the comfort of his arms as she sat in the theatre chair, her heart racing, her mind spinning. She hurt — more than she could ever remember hurting before.

Every single piece of her life was a lie. There wasn’t a savior coming to take the pain away. Not now, not tomorrow. She truly was on her own. When her breath rushed in as her lips parted, she realized she’d been holding it.

Oxygen flooded her brain, and she had to fight the panic wanting to overwhelm her. It did her no good. She had to focus, had to figure out what came next.

But the spinning wouldn’t stop long enough for her to do that.

Maybe it was time to go. She couldn’t watch the film. The couple frolicking on the beach was too much for her fragile mind. She didn’t stand more than a few inches before she felt the presence next to her. The instant awareness filtering through her left no doubt at all who it was.

Dalton.

How had he found her? As soon as she had the thought, she pushed it away. Of course he’d found her. She’d thought she was escaping, but there was no escape with him. Whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted it — it was his.

Without permission, Elena found herself sitting back down, her will to leave suddenly taken from her. Even though she wanted to leave, more of her wanted to stay. Everything wrong about the situation rushed through her brain, but it didn’t matter.

Still, she stayed.

No!

She wasn’t this person, wasn’t this woman to be controlled. Maybe she didn’t know exactly who she was, but certainly she was better than a robot. She began to rise again.

“Don’t.”

His voice was barely loud enough to move across the short space between the two of them and yet that one utterance was enough to make her fall back into her chair as she gripped the arms.

Still she hadn’t looked at him yet.

The force of his gaze compelled her to turn, and she found him looking at her, his eyes fierce as he gazed back. Elena was instantly falling again, but this time it was right into his spell.

And the man knew it.

Elena wanted to say something, but she couldn’t speak as he leaned closer to her, his hot breath grazing her throat as his hand came down and rested on her thigh. Instant heat pushed away her stress, pushed away the impending doom she’d been feeling.

Suddenly her only thoughts were of Dalton and what Dalton was able to do, to take away her mental anguish. All feeling in her body was centered in one area, not too far from where his fingers rested so casually — yet so damn possessive.

Elena’s fingers tightened on the arm rests as she tried her hardest not to react to Dalton, or at least to not show him the reaction she couldn’t help but feel.

Without looking, she felt him lean closer, his fingers tightening on her leg. His hot breath lingered on her ear as his lips brushed so lightly against the edge, she wasn’t positive he’d actually touched her.

“Where are you running to, Elena?”

So many answers filtered through Elena’s mind at the question. The answer that was most prevalent was hell. She was running straight to hell. And Dalton was right on her heels, giving her no way to escape.

“It doesn’t matter,” she told him. She tried to keep her voice as neutral as his. She didn’t exactly pull it off.

“I think it matters very much,” he replied, that bit of confidence in his tone that made her more attracted to him. She hated herself for it.

Slowly, his fingers stirred on her leg, and even through the fabric of her cotton pants, she could feel the burn as he made his way up her thigh. He wasn’t in a hurry, but she was aware of every fraction of an inch that drew him closer to her hot center.

“I hate that you think you can say whatever you want to me. And I hate even more that you think you can do whatever you want,” she said through gritted teeth.

She was still gripping the arm rests, not stopping him as he lazily rubbed along her leg, not touching her center, but moving closer and then backing away again.

“If you hated it, you wouldn’t still be sitting here,” he told her.

“You need to stop,” she said. Deciding it was time to go, she started to rise.

Without a word, he applied pressure to her leg, not a lot, but enough that she was his willing slave. She stopped trying to stand as he continued caressing her thigh, his face mere inches from her own.

His fingers slipped beneath her skirt; his touch on her naked skin was all it took to keep her pinned exactly where she sat. That was the power he held over her.

A deep gush of air exploded inside her when she finally took her next breath. The rush of oxygen only heightened what she was feeling.

“Where are you running to, Elena?” he repeated.

But her mind was foggy, and she couldn’t seem to form a coherent thought, especially when his hand reached the top of her thigh and his finger brushed the outside of her panties, her humiliation complete with the knowledge that her wetness had to be obvious even through the material.

She was so hot — so turned on by the barest of touches from just this one man. He was the anchor keeping her on the ground, and they both knew it.

“We need to have a talk, Elena, and we should probably do it where there aren’t so many witnesses,” he said, continuing to caress her leg.

“Please stop,” she told him.

“You don’t want me to stop talking to you or touching you, Elena. If you did, you would get up and walk away. You don’t want to run from me, but you don’t understand why. I’m going to help you with this, but you have to let me,” he told her.

He spoke quietly but that didn’t lessen the command in his tone. And his touch kept throwing her off kilter. His fingers were crawling from the top of her thighs, brushing her heated core and then moving down past her knee in scorching passes.

She didn’t speak as he continued his seduction.

“You’re hot for me, Elena. Your panties are soaked, your breathing hitched, your nipples tight and swollen, hungry for my mouth. You want my touch; you want what I do to your body. You want me to help you forget the spinning you’re feeling. You love it, and you know you aren’t going anywhere.”

His breath heated her ear, then his lips trailed down the side of her neck, making her mouth go dry and those swollen nipples he’d been talking about ache more than they ever had before. Her core dripped with desire.

“You’re imagining me pounding deep inside you over and over again while my teeth grip your ripe nipples. You want my tongue lapping up your juices while my fingers dive deep inside. You want me to touch every inch of you, and you want me to do this over and over again.”

“No. That’s not what I want,” she panted.

“Your body calls you a liar,” he said, licking along the edge of her earlobe.

“You don’t own me,” she told him.

“That’s where you’re very wrong, Elena. I own you, and I can do with you what I want, when I want,” he said, boldness in his tone as he slid past the barrier of her panties before she could think about stopping him.

She was so focused on his touch, the roomful of people faded away. When his fingers touched her bare heat she had to bite her lip to keep a moan from escaping. His fingers slipped inside her, and she wanted to cry out in frustration.

He was giving her just enough to make her want to scream, but not enough to end the torment he was giving her with no remorse.

“Tell me you’re mine, and I’ll end the torment,” he promised as he dove his thick fingers deep inside her. “Do you see how this makes you forget all the other pain, all the choices in life you have no power to decide?”

It took a moment for her to process his last words.

“Let go, Elena, let it all go. Give it to me, and I’ll take care of you.”

She couldn’t do that. She couldn’t . . .

Dalton captured her lips and the moan that would have alerted the theatre patrons of exactly what they were doing. But she was beyond caring what anyone else knew . . . or saw.

“Give yourself to me now!”

The harshness of his voice snapped her out of her lust-induced coma. Jerking her head away from him, she glared as she pulled his hand away, the smell of her arousal so strong she was sure it had infused the air.

“Go to hell, Dalton.”

Jumping from her seat, Elena rushed from the theatre.

She sunk against a wall around a corner and gripped her head in her hands. Maybe she didn’t want him to go to hell after all. Because she was sure that’s where she was going — and she’d be there with him forever.

Of course it didn’t take Dalton long to find her. He still didn’t need to speak for her to know he was there. He was always there, even when he wasn’t with her physically.

“I’m beginning to think you love the chase, Elena,” he told her.

“Just leave me alone, Dalton.”

“I might do exactly that if you keep telling me to go away,” he said.

She knew this wasn’t a bluff. If she told him to go away again, he was going to leave her. Slight panic filled her at the thought. But wasn’t getting away from him exactly what she wanted?

Elena didn’t know what she wanted. But she couldn’t think with Dalton looming over her.

“Stand up,” he told her.

For some reason, Elena found herself doing as he’d demanded. She rose to her feet, using the wall to hold her up as her chin tilted, and looked him in the face for the first time since the park.

Dammit! She really was his. Even if she didn’t want to be. At the end of the day, she was doing exactly as he commanded her.

“I wasn’t lying to you, Elena. The choice is yours. If you want the pain to go away. If you want your life to start again, then submit to me fully and I will teach you how to heal. But I won’t chase you again. The choice is up to you. I’ll be at this address tonight. If you choose to come, there’s no turning back.”

He grasped her chin, forcing her to look into his eyes. The truth lay there loud and clear. She licked her lips, and his gaze zeroed in on them.

“Remember how it feels to be in my arms,” he told her. “And remember how it feels to be all alone.”

He gazed for a few more moments and then he stepped back, the wall behind her the only thing keeping her upright. She looked at the slip of paper as she heard his footsteps fade away.

Glancing back, all she saw was his back. He never turned around again. This was it. She either walked away from there and out of his life forever. Or she followed him to the address.

Elena didn’t know what she was going to do, as she watched him walk out the theatre doors and out of her life.

I
n the end,
there really wasn’t a choice.

Dalton had known it, and so had Elena. The pain of being betrayed by her mother, of being captured, abused, and demoralized weighed far too heavy within her. And Elena knew she wasn’t going to get past the pain on her own.

There was only one solution for her. And as she stepped into the hotel at the address Dalton had given her, there was no further hesitation in her steps. After hours of searching deep within herself, she realized there was only emptiness where she had sought answers.

Elena was only a shell of a person now, and she either had to give up on life or give in to Dalton. For some reason, she was still hanging on to a small thread of hope. Maybe Dalton truly would be her savior.

When she gave her name at the front desk and was handed a key card to the top floor, she didn’t even blink. Of course Dalton had known she would come to him. She knew there had never been any doubt in his mind.

But if she had chosen to walk away, it wouldn’t have bothered him in the least. She knew that. The knowledge of her insignificance to the man actually made the situation that much easier.

To him she was nothing more than a toy. But because of him, she might just find herself again. Only if she did it by his rules.

She didn’t use the key card when she reached the penthouse door. For a few minutes she just stood there, concentrating on breathing in and out. Finally, she knocked — just a light tapping of her knuckles against the wood.

She waited.

Dalton took his time in answering and when he did, neither of them said a word as he looked into her eyes. There was no question in his, no victory or taunting. He simply looked at her — and she held his gaze.

Lightning quick, he reached out to her, pulling her inside, and letting the door slam shut. Pushing her back against it, he crushed her body with his as his mouth consumed hers.

It wasn’t seduction, it was punishment for making him wait as long as she had. It was a mating ritual and a claiming all in one. He was the alpha, and he wanted her to know it.

After a few punishing minutes, he released her and took a step back, completely in control again, not a hair out of place as he once again scrutinized her. It was difficult not to shake, as she waited for his command.

“It will be different now, Elena. You’ve made your choice,” he began. She didn’t try to interrupt. “You will do what I say, when and how I say it. You will obey me without hesitation. If you are unhappy about something, you will keep it to yourself. If you want to gain control back into your life, first you have to trust me enough to let go. Only then will you find yourself and the answers you seek to who you truly are.”

She absorbed what he said to her and tried to process it.

“I found out who I am. I don’t want to be her,” Elena told him.

Dalton’s lips turned up the slightest bit.

“You haven’t even begun to find out who you are, Elena. The girl who was sold and abused is gone — she’s been gone for a long time. If you don’t find a way to deal with the pain that’s sitting just below the surface, when that bubble pops, it will drown you. I’m going to teach you control. But there won’t be any more chances. You either obey me this time, or I will toss you away to figure out the rest on your own.”

“I don’t know what to do,” she told him, wanting his touch, but not knowing how to ask for it.

“I will teach you to deal with your anger. I will show how to control what can’t be controlled. I will show you how to handle what’s happened to you. But I can only do that if you give me full control, if you let go, if you hand me the reins to train you.”

He didn’t touch her; he simply stood a few feet away, still as a statue.

She searched his face, wanting to know what to do. She was unsure. Her life was spiraling out of control as her memories continued returning. Tears streaked down her cheeks as she faced him.

She couldn’t handle it, couldn’t handle the pain of the loss she’d suffered. She wanted her brother, she wanted her mother, but they didn’t want her. She had no identity. None. Her breathing accelerated; she fought the panic wanting to overtake her.

He crossed the distance between them and grabbed her hair, forcing her head back. “Give me the control,” he demanded, almost violently.

This should have made it worse, but suddenly there was calm where panic had been. He pulled her to a chair, not releasing her hair. The pain on her scalp actually focused her energy.

Sitting down, he threw her across his lap and trapped her. “Say it, Elena. Say you are mine,” he demanded.

Dalton’s hand rubbed across her ass, not gently, but not painfully either. He squeezed hard and made her cry out, then rubbed it roughly, sending sensations through her. Suddenly she was focused on the pleasure that began spiraling through her body instead of the ache she’d been feeling for hours, days, years.

“I won’t help you if you don’t submit to me,” he threatened.

And then, when she didn’t speak, he pushed her off him. Suddenly she felt cold, empty, alone, as she stood before him trembling. She cried out when he stood and began to move toward the hotel door.

“Don’t go,” she pled.

“Then submit,” he warned, stopping a couple feet from the door. “Or you will leave . . . forever.”

She stared at him and knew he wasn’t bluffing. He began to turn away again. She had no doubt that if he opened that door and pushed her through it, he would never open it again. He would be nothing more than a distant memory in her past.

“Yes!” she cried just as he began opening the door.

He turned back toward her. His entire expression changed. This was the master; this was the man who would heal her.

Without saying a word, he swiftly moved back to her and gave her a look of command.

“It begins now.”

“Okay,” she told him, shaking where she stood.

“Good,” he said as he began undoing the tie he was wearing. “Strip all of your clothes away and lie down on the bed.”

There was no going back now. Elena knew she couldn’t afford to hesitate, but she also knew she was choosing to give herself over to a man — a man who would do anything he wanted to her whenever he wanted.

It was terrifying, but what was worse was the fact that she also craved it.

It felt like forever that she stood there after his command, but in reality it was less than a full second before her feet began moving. Though her time with Dalton over the past couple of years had never been easy, it had been an emotional rollercoaster ride.

And if she was on that ride with Dalton, then she wasn’t falling through an endless sky with no chance of survival when she hit the ground.

So Elena moved across his room, entered another doorway, and saw a huge bed. As she looked at the bed, she focused on stripping away her clothes. She turned off her thoughts, freeing herself from the agony of pain that was trying to consume her.

Because, in the end, she could handle physical pain, and she anticipated the pleasure. It was her emotions she couldn’t deal with.

Her clothes stripped away, she didn’t look back at Dalton as she climbed onto the bed and lay down, her body on display for the man who stood in the doorway watching her every move, no expression on his face to tell her what he was feeling or thinking.

But she didn’t need to see a reaction from his eyes — they would ignite soon enough. She knew beyond a shadow of a doubt he wanted her, needed her, and craved her just as much as she craved him.

“Very good, Elena. See how much easier it is when you obey,” he told her as he stepped closer, his fingers undoing the buttons on his shirt before he stripped it away.

She said nothing.

“I much prefer this obedient woman,” he said with a slight mocking in his tone. “Now I want you to move up farther on the bed.” She did. “Good girl.” She gritted her teeth together. She couldn’t show him her anger at being belittled. It was all part of his process whether she liked it or not.

“Put your hands out wide above your head.”

He took off his pants and underwear and stood before her, thick and hard, not at all ashamed of showing his reaction to her obedience.

Reaching into the drawer next to the bed, Dalton pulled out two silk ropes, and Elena had to fight not to pull her arms back against her. She loved what Dalton did to her while he had his way with her, but being restrained was her least favorite of all the things he did. The total loss of control was almost too much to take.

But she left her arms right where they were as he moved to first one side of the bed and then the other, quickly and efficiently securing her wrists with one end and then tying the restraints to the posts on the bed.

Dalton’s fingers trailed down her arm and over the curve of her breast, tweaking her nipple before moving to the other one and squeezing that one even harder, making a whimper escape her throat.

She squeezed her thighs together as pressure quickly built up. This was always how it was with him, one erotic dance leading into another, barely giving her time to catch her breath.

“Don’t close your legs,” he demanded as he stepped back and caressed her body with his eyes. “I like them spread open for me, showing me your heat, showing me how much you desire me. Open them . . . wider . . . wider . . .”

Her reward for doing as he commanded was his fingers caressing her legs from her feet, all the way up her thighs, then slipping across her wet heat. He didn’t secure her legs, but continued running his fingers up and down them, and then sweeping lightly across her stomach and breasts.

Elena’s body reacted to Dalton’s masterful touch as she squirmed beneath him. He climbed onto the bed and retraced the path of his fingers with his tongue, making her cry out.

“Shh. Hold it in,” he told her as his mouth latched onto her nipple, and he sucked hard before nibbling on it like it was a tasty treat.

She had to bite her lip to keep the moans from escaping as he continued exploring her body, inch by beautiful inch, bringing her close to orgasm before withdrawing, making her want to whimper in agony.

He didn’t touch her lips, which was probably good since she was biting the bottom one so hard it was swelling. A hungry growl escaped him as he slid down her body, kissing her stomach before his lips tasted her near where she throbbed the most.

She thought he would tease her again, move away, but then his mouth was latched on at her core, his tongue diving inside her, and she couldn’t prevent the cry of pleasure from rumbling out of her.

This time he didn’t silence her, though. Placing his hands beneath her butt, he lifted her up, making his access to her core easier as he devoured her wet lips and sucked on her throbbing center.

“Remember the pleasure, Elena. Focus on the pleasure,” he told her, breaking his lips away for only a moment before he dove back in and swept his tongue repeatedly across her center.

He knew every time she was ready to release because he moved away at the last moment and nibbled on another part of her heated core before coming back and licking her again and again.

She was nothing but a mass of heat and desire. There wasn’t one place on her body not throbbing with a mixture of pleasure and pain. She wanted release, but she didn’t want the seduction to end.

Her head turned from side to side on the bed as she groaned, wishing she could reach out and grab him, hold him in place so he would complete what he kept starting.

When she thought he was going to send her over the edge, though, he pulled back again, but this time didn’t latch his mouth back on, making her cry out her frustration. He had left her before without an orgasm. She didn’t think she could possibly bear it if he chose to do that to her now.

He sat back and looked at her, triumph in his eyes as he reached down and gripped his thickness, the tip soaked from his own pleasure. He rubbed his palm across the end, wetting it before he rubbed himself while looking at her.

“Are you mine, Elena?” he asked, his voice husky as his hand stroked up and down his thick shaft.

“Yes.” She didn’t hesitate, hungry for him to fill her.

“Will you obey me?” he asked again, his eyes fixed on her wetness instead of her face.

“Yes, Dalton,” she said, her voice weak from need.

With that, he released his grip on himself and crawled over her. There was no need for protection as he’d made sure she was on birth control long ago. There was nothing to prevent them from being skin to skin as he entered her.

“You are mine now, Elena. Don’t forget it again or you won’t like the consequences,” he told her before finally lining himself up with her. She could fill his thickness resting against her hot core, and she whimpered again as he bent over her without thrusting inside.

Instead of uniting them, he leaned back and then grabbed one of her legs, lifting it higher and higher until it was over his shoulder, stretching her wider than she’d ever been stretched before.

And then he was centered against her again, her core opened to him, his thickness more than ready to plunge inside. She’d never wanted him more than she did right then.

“Please, Dalton . . .” she whimpered.

It must have been what he was waiting for, because his fingers tightened on her ass as he thrust forward, sinking himself fully inside in one hard motion that had her world spinning.

He was so big, so full, and so perfect she knew it wouldn’t take her long at all to find the completion he’d so far denied her. Without any further hesitation or teasing, Dalton found a sensual rhythm as he stretched her leg even farther and urgently pushed in and out of her tight body.

A few more thrusts and Elena wanted to explode, but she held off, also not wanting the moment to end. She kept trying to reach for him, but her bound hands prevented her.

“Come now, Elena, come hard,” Dalton commanded as he pushed even harder, his hips slamming against her core as he sunk deeper and deeper inside her.

There was no chance of her disobeying him. Her body exploded, gripping him tightly, making him touch every millimeter of space inside her pulsing walls. The orgasm intensified even more when she felt the hot spurts of his own release coating her insides.