Forever You (17 page)

sacrifice,” I said while looking into her blue eyes.

Her eyes began to swell with tears as she traced my lips with her finger. “Those are the most

beautiful words that anyone has ever said to me.”

“They’re true, every last word,” I whispered as our lips met one last time, and we made love

before heading off to bed.

***

Morning had come, and I opened my eyes as the sun peeked through the sheer curtains that hung

perfectly on the windows. Ellery was snuggled against me as our legs were wrapped around each

other and tangled in the sheets. She stirred and moved her hand down my chest as she looked up me

and smiled. I kissed the tip of her nose.

“Morning, baby,” I said.

“Good morning, babe; I want to wake up like this every day. I love waking up in your arms.”

Hearing her say that made me very happy. I was afraid she thought things were moving too fast with

us.

“I can’t think of a more perfect way to start off the day than waking up with you in my arms,” I

smiled as I kissed her lips.

We both got up when we heard a knock on the door. I put on my pajama bottoms and opened the

door. It was our complimentary breakfast. As we were enjoying breakfast and coffee, Ellery received

a text message from her ex-boyfriend, Kyle. She seemed concerned because he was in Michigan, and

he wanted to see her. I told her it was fine and to tell him where we were. I couldn’t shake the feeling

that Ellery was really upset by his text message. She didn’t tell me, but I could see the anguish in her

face. We headed to the bedroom, got dressed, and packed our bags to head back to Michigan. It

wasn’t too long before Kyle knocked on the door.

Ellery sighed and let him in. He had a surprised look on his face when he saw me. I smiled, waved,

and said hello. He wanted to talk to Ellery in private, but she had refused. I said it was ok and that I’d

be in the bedroom if she needed me. She nodded her head, and Kyle thanked me.

After about 10 minutes, I heard Ellery yelling at Kyle. I decided to wait it out a little bit to see if

she would calm down before I went out there. When she didn’t, but instead continued to get louder, I

stepped out of the bedroom and overheard Kyle asking her if she had told me something. I walked

over to where they stood.

“Tell me what?” I asked as I looked at Ellery. She was pleading with Kyle to be quiet for both

their sakes. I didn’t know what the hell was going on. All I knew was that Kyle was trying to tell me

something, and Ellery was scared shitless; I could tell by the look on her face. Kyle didn’t listen to

Ellery and looked directly at me with cold eyes. I looked over at Ellery as tears started streaming

down her face.

“She has cancer, but she refuses to go and get treatments; she’s just going to let herself die. That’s

why I left her. I couldn’t sit there and watch her die,” he said.

I froze. I didn’t believe it. Kyle looked at Ellery, said he was sorry, and he walked out the door.

My heart started racing and it felt like it was going to jump out of my chest. I looked at Ellery as her

tears flowed freely from her eyes. I was too scared to hear the answer to my next question.

“Ellery, is that true?!” I yelled.

She flinched at my raised voice and nodded her head. “Yes, it’s true,” she cried.

I clenched my fists and tightened my jaw. “You’ve known your cancer was back even before I met

you, but you still hid it from me after everything we’ve been through? What kind of person are you?!”

I screamed at her. I didn’t know what I was doing. I was confused and in disbelief. My skin grew hot,

and I felt like I couldn’t breathe.

“Please, Connor, let me explain,” she pleaded.

I was so angry that I couldn’t see straight. “Explain what? What’s left to explain? Were you just

going to tell me one day that you were dying? And why the fuck aren’t you getting any treatment?”

This didn’t make any sense to me. Why would she just refuse treatment and let herself die? Who does

that sort of thing?

“Please, calm down, Connor,” she pleaded.

“Calm down? You expect me to be calm when I just found out that the woman I love and want to

spend the rest of my life with is dying? I don’t want to hear anything from you. You make me sick,

Ellery. I can’t do this; I can’t even look at you.” I was blinded by rage, and my emotions were out of

control. I turned towards the bedroom. Ellery followed after me and grabbed my arm.

“Please, Connor, don’t do this; let me explain.”

I jerked my arm away, and she fell back onto the floor. I turned and looked at her, my voice now

calm, but pained. “Your dizzy spells and your tiredness, it’s all part of the cancer. You’re getting

worse, and you knew it, but you still didn’t tell me. I bared my soul to you. I told you things nobody in

this world knows. I shared myself with you. How could you do that to me, Ellery?” I asked as my

eyes filled with tears. I walked to the bedroom and slammed the door.

I paced back and forth across the floor. My breathing was still rapid, and my heart felt like it had

been broken into a million tiny pieces. There was no way that I could drive with her back to New

York, so I pulled out my phone and booked her on the next flight back to New York. I grabbed my bag

and opened the bedroom door. As I was walking towards the door, Ellery jumped up.

“Connor, wait, please,” she begged.

I turned around and pointed at her, “Stay away from me. I booked a flight for you back to New

York; it leaves in two hours, so compose yourself and be ready. I’m driving back by myself. I can’t

stand to look at you right now, let alone ride in a car with you for 10 hours.” I walked out of the hotel

room and left the love of my life alone, scared, and crying. What kind of person was I? I questioned

myself as I got inside the Range Rover and gripped the steering wheel as tight as I could. I picked up

my phone and dialed Denny.

“Hello, Connor. How’s your trip going?” he asked.

“Denny, Miss Lane will be arriving on a flight from Michigan in about four hours. She’s on flight

#282, and I need you to pick her up, then drive her back to her apartment.”

“Is everything ok, Connor? You sound upset,” he asked.

“Miss Lane and I will not be seeing each other anymore, and I don’t want to discuss it. I just left the

hotel, and I’m heading back to New York. Just make sure you pick her up from the airport and take

her home.”

“Very well, Connor. I’ll be there to pick up Miss Lane.”

“Denny,” I said before he hung up.

“Yes, Connor?”

“She’s probably going to need you to comfort her when she steps off the plane. Please be there for

her,” I said.

“No problem, Connor. You know I’m very fond of Miss Lane.”

I hung up the phone and pulled out of the hotel parking lot. My mind was racing and reliving the

conversation with Kyle over and over. I was blinded by rage when Ellery confirmed she has cancer

and that she’s not seeking treatment for it. I know I said some pretty mean things, but I’m so angry, and

I feel betrayed. I wondered if she was ever going to tell me that she’s sick. I knew something was off

with her from the start, but I never dreamed her cancer came back. I turned my phone off. I didn’t

want to talk to anyone or hear anything. I was trying so hard to hold it together because the last thing I

needed was to fall apart. I couldn’t stop thinking about her sitting on the floor and the look on her face

when I yelled at her. I couldn’t stop thinking about the fear in her eyes right before Kyle told me.

She’s alone, but there was no way I could stay there with her. What she did to me was so fucking

hurtful. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forgive her. Tears started to fall down my face as I was

driving down the road. I glanced over and saw a field to the right. I pulled over to the side of the

road, got out of the Range Rover, and started running towards the field. I felt a few raindrops hit my

face. I ran until I couldn’t run anymore. I stopped in the middle of the field and screamed. The hurt

and betrayal I felt was unreal; something I’ve never experienced before. The sky opened up, and the

rain came pouring down upon me as I dropped to my knees and sobbed. My heart physically ached,

and my chest felt like it had been punched. I felt like my life had just been ripped away from me.

I got up from the ground and headed back to the Range Rover. I was soaked, cold, and I needed to

change into some dry clothes. I opened the back, grabbed my bag, and threw it on the front seat. I

climbed in the back seat and changed out of my wet clothes. I had a towel in my bag that I used to dry

off my body and hair. After I put on some dry clothes, I climbed in the driver’s seat and took in a deep

breath. I needed to call Peyton to tell her what happened and find out if she knew Ellery was sick. I

called my associate, Scott, and had him get Peyton’s number. As soon as he called me back with it, I

dialed her number as I pulled onto the road.

“Hello,” Peyton answered.

“Peyton, its Connor Black, and I need to talk to you.”

“Connor, is everything ok? Is Elle ok?” she asked in a panicked tone.

“I have a question for you, and I want you to be honest with me, please.”

“Connor, you’re kind of scaring me here. What the fuck is going on?”

“Did you know that Ellery’s cancer came back?” There was silence on the other end.

“No, Connor, I didn’t know that. She never said a word to me about it.”

I could tell Peyton was telling the truth, and I hated that I was the one to tell her, but I needed her to

be there for Ellery, so I had to explain what happened.

“Kyle came to the hotel room in Michigan and told me that Ellery’s cancer is back. He also said

that she’s refusing to get treatment, and that’s why he left her, because he couldn’t sit there and watch

her die.”

“What a fucking douchebag,” she said. “And what do you mean she isn’t getting treatment?”

“She won’t get treatments, because she said she can’t go through it again. Peyton, I said some

horrible things to her, and I left her. I booked a flight back to Michigan for her, and I left her alone in

the hotel room. I’m having my driver pick her up from the airport and drive her home. She’s going to

need you when she gets there. I need you to be with her and make sure she’s ok and safe.”

“Connor, are you ok?” she asked.

“I don’t know, Peyton. I feel all fucked up inside, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forgive

her for keeping this from me.”

“You’re hurt and upset right now; I get that, but if you love her like I think you do, that’s what will

get you through this.”

“I have to go, Peyton. Please just be there for Ellery.”

“I will, Connor. Don’t worry about her; I’ve got this.”

I hung up and continued driving. My head was pounding and the sting of tears still clouded my eyes.

My head was a clusterfuck with everything that had happened. How could I be the happiest person

alive a day ago, but the most miserable person alive today? I drove straight through to New York. The

only stop I made was to get gas.

When I finally made it home, I stepped off the elevator and into the darkness of my penthouse. It felt

lonely because the last time I was here, Ellery was too. I threw my keys on the table in the hallway

and walked over to the bar. I grabbed the bottle of scotch, a glass, and walked upstairs to my room. I

threw back my glass and downed the first shot. I needed the alcohol to stop the pain. I got up from the

bed and made my way to the bathroom. I needed a shower. I stepped inside and stood under the hot

stream of water that ran down my body. I was both physically and mentally exhausted. I put my hands

against the shower wall and lowered my head. I felt lost and never more alone in my life. I stepped

out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist. As I walked into the bedroom, I stopped and

stared at Ellery’s paintings. I bought them so I could feel closer to her, but at that moment, I didn’t; I

only felt further away. I sat on the edge of the bed and looked at my phone. I was surprised that she

didn’t try to call me. I think after what I said to her and in the tone I said it, she was probably scared.

I turned my phone off, because I didn’t want to be bothered by anyone. I picked up the bottle of pills

that Dr. Peters gave me and decided to take one to help me sleep. I poured another glass of scotch and

downed it with the pill. I got up, walked to my dresser, put on a pair of pajama bottoms, and climbed

into bed. I laid there until a single tear fell down my face as I fell fast asleep.

Chapter 14

The next morning, I rolled over and opened my eyes, staring at the empty bed next to me. I reached

over to grab my phone from the nightstand and turned it on. I wasn’t supposed to be back from

Michigan yet, but I gave strict instructions to Valerie not to bother me unless someone was dying. I

knew my company would be in good hands with Phil, my vice president. A text message from Ashlyn