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She means vaginal penetration. In the heat of the moment, Christopher isn’t going to slow down and parse out her euphemism. He acts in the way his enflamed senses most Nancy Friday

80

want to understand the words. He fucks her in the ass, inflicting great pain. Of all fantasies to choose to live out, S&M

scenarios are the ones to be approached with the most caution, the most careful setting out of safeguards first.

In a sense, there is a measure of magical thinking in Christopher’s conduct, a kind of wish fulfillment imposed on reality, allowing him to do as he wishes. “If I like it, she will, too.” This is usually called projection, an extremely narcissistic way of dealing with the world. Other people aren’t seen as entities in themselves, with their own wishes and fears. Instead, they are seen as mirrors of the narcissist. Says a psychoanalyst colleague of mine: “Half my work involves people who do not correctly perceive signals they get from other people. They can only see what they want to see, and that is usually in their favor. It leads to them bungling what goes on between themselves and others.” Warren (above) says he doesn’t think the women who sent me their fantasies are typical. In fact, he suspects they are really men. He has never met this kind of woman (or did not recognize her if he did).

Therefore, she does not exist.

MURRAY

Not until a few years ago did I have any idea that my wife’s fantasies were the center of her sexual fulfillment. I discovered this one night after we had attended a movie starring Paul Newman and Robert Redford.

Even in the darkness of the movie house, I became aware that my wife would go into a kind of trance whenever Mr.

Newman was dominating the action or was the center of attention. When we got home, we had a few drinks, and we talked. My wife could not stop discussing how well Mr.

Newman played his role.

Seeing her excitement and how stimulated she was becoming just remembering the film, I took it upon myself to pretend to be Paul Newman in our bedroom. I tried to stand the Men In Love

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way he did in the movie; and I spoke to my wife, using some of the phrases we had just heard him use. I even encouraged her to call me “Paul.” Between my (amateur) acting ability and my wife’s (very strong) fantasies, I was a box office smash hit. The night ended early the next morning – sunrise, as a matter of act with two of the world’s most sexually satisfied people. My wife has told me about some of her other fantasy men, and I have told her my fantasies about women.

Our reward has been each other’s love.

PATRICK

First of all, I am thirty-four years old, married and a schoolteacher. My home sex life is rather dull, which accounts for the vivid imagination that I’ve managed to develop over the years, especially as I work with many gorgeous young women.

My fantasies always revolve around some of my students, who are aged from sixteen to eighteen. Being a confirmed

“ass man” I am constantly distracted by the luscious curves all around me at school.

While masturbating I imagine that the girls are all ready and just waiting for me to make the first move. I never get turned down in my dreams (who does?).

I pick out one girl, and during the class, while the rest of the students are working, I move over casually to this student and start talking with her about her work. While talking I will absentmindedly stroke her hair, and she will respond by resting her head against my hand, carefully so that nobody will notice. We are both quickly becoming excited. She knows what I want, and she wants it too.

By this time I am becoming hard, and she will notice and push her chair back a little so that her shoulder is pressing against my erection, where she rubs it with little movements.

In turn I point to her work in front of her and manage to brush against her breast “accidentally.” The risk of somebody Nancy Friday

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noticing what we are doing makes it all the more exciting to us. By this time we are both so horny that it must become noticeable, so I back off and suggest that she come with me to a storeroom to get some materials. The rest of the class continues working.

When we get to the storeroom I lock the door and then turn to her. She is waiting, roused, but not knowing what to do as I am the first man that has affected her this way. We kiss delicately, and then I turn her back to me and pull her to me. At first she doesn’t understand why, but when I start touching and fondling her breasts and nipples she sees the advantages of this position and presses back against me. Then I slowly work down to her clitoris and the tension builds up in her until I finally reach under her jeans and panties and rub my finger between her slit. It is wet now and juicy with anticipation. She is frantically pushing and rubbing her ass against my cock by this time, and I’m almost bursting. I undo her jeans button and unzip her fly (for some reason it’s always jeans in this fantasy), while at the same time she has reached behind her and is undoing my zipper and stroking my erect cock.

Its size scares her for a little while, and I have to gently persuade her that she can take it in. By this time she is really

“hot,” so she pushes it between her legs and guides it so that I can shove it into her quickly. (Right now I’m hard just thinking about it.)

We fuck quickly and excitedly, standing up, with her back still to me, with an added thrill from the fact that anybody may come into the storeroom at any time. She reaches down and fondles my balls while I excite her nipples and clitoris simultaneously. We both come together, and it’s like the end of the world. When we walk out of the storeroom later, both of us are flushed and yet trying to appear normal.

While this may appear to be a quite ordinary fantasy, for me it became a fact about six months ago, and the student and I became lovers (and are still lovers). We fucked whenever Men In Love

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we could, and there are a surprisingly large number of places around a school where one can meet and fuck.

I was her first lover, but she became a very willing pupil, and learned all that she could about fucking, anal and oral sex. We’ve tried just about everything, and she loves it all, as I do.

We both particularly prefer oral sex, as there is something really relaxing about just laying back receiving pleasure from a person who is really devoted to you (just as it is equally relaxing to give pleasure to another whom you love, without violent movements to distract).

So I think that I’m extremely fortunate in being able to live out my fantasies in real life. How many others can say that?

MIGUEL

My profession is the law. I am thirty-four, six-one, one hundred eighty pounds, dark complexion (I’m half Mexican), enjoy women – their touch, their taste, their smell, and ultimately their sexuality.

I have the usual male response ego-wise to seeing a woman I am making love to experiencing a particularly satisfying orgasm or series of orgasms. But I really get off when my partner totally loses her control while I’m keeping mine (at least for the moment). When I can feel my woman raising her hips to get more of my tongue in her cunt or to press her clit harder against my mouth, I get unbelievably turned on.

Even if we’ve been fucking all night, that kind of response gets me hard again almost all the time.

I also get turned on by a proper woman’s use of bedroom language particularly under sexual tension. “Please fuck me –

now
,” “I want your cock,” “Give it to me,” “Don’t make me beg you,” are enormous turn-ons. The ultimate, of course, is that inarticulate scream or cry at orgasm, when her legs go rigid and her face becomes red and contorted. Afterwards, I Nancy Friday

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like to lick the perspiration off her back, neck, breasts and chest, while she’s coming down.

The foregoing has been to give you some kind of feel for my own sense of sexuality, however inadequate. This may help in seeing why or how the fantasies I have impact on me.

Fantasy One:
Samantha was a receptionist for another law firm in the building. She was my type – slim hipped with well shaped legs and ass, with small breasts and supersensitive nipples. I used to love to slowly tongue-stroke her clit while touching her hardened nipples as lightly as possible – the climaxes she felt were shattering. One night, after an unusually long session of this type, Sam turned the tables and rolled me on my back. At first, she simply tongued my cock and balls, but after a few minutes she got astride, facing me.

She had super muscle control and was able to squeeze my cock with her cunt as if it were a hand. I can still picture her smiling confidently at the effect she was producing on me and by her own incredibly sexy appearance. A couple of times she bent over so that I could lick her nipples. My hands roamed between her breasts and her incredibly smooth thighs.

Suddenly she came – and almost as suddenly recovered and continued milking my cock in her cunt. I was going out of my mind. I started to moan and then just at the moment of climax, she jumped off, took my cock deeply in her mouth, sucking and swallowing my come – I nearly had a heart attack! In fact, I experienced aftershocks of sensitivity at the tip of my cock as many women do. I think the thing that reached me was the incredible intimacy and closeness of wanting to better feel and taste my climax. And, while this was a true event, it is an old favorite if I need to masturbate.

Fantasy Two:
A client had an interest in a court case in another city, where he was expecting to testify. Although I was not trying the case, my client wanted me to sit in and evaluate the developments as they pertained to him.

I noticed the court reporter right away – she was not beautiful but attractive and appealing. Long slim legs and very lithe figure. She was wearing a see-through blouse through Men In Love

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which her bra was visible. As luck would have it, we ate at the same lunch counter and were able to make some small talk. After the afternoon recess, I wanted to ask the reporter out, but was expecting to brief my client at 8:00 P.M. I com-promised by asking her to have a drink after work – she accepted and we went to the cocktail lounge at my hotel, which was on her way home.

We got on fabulously and in no time at all, it was seven thirty-time for me to go to meet my client. The only alternative seemed to be a “late date” for whenever I finished. She came with me to my room and while I picked up my brief-case, she went to the john. When she came out, she had a gleam in her eye and no bra under her see-through blouse. I took her breasts into my hands – rubbing the sheer fabric of her blouse against her nipples. She pressed her mound up hard against my cock, telling me at the same time that she knew I had to go, but that her cunt had been dripping hot for the last hour. How (or why) I had the control to leave there, I don’t know, but I wanted more than a wham/bam/thank you ma’am from that woman. In any event we agreed that I would see her immediately after I finished with the client. We went out into the hallway and while we were waiting for the elevator, she whispered in my ear, “I just want you to know where I’m going to start when I see you later.” With that she unzipped my pants and took my cock in her mouth. The elevator came and left (fortunately empty) before she stopped. She looked up (she was kneeling in front of me) and said, “I just won’t be satisfied until I have your cock – I want you to come in my mouth and then I want you to fuck me and fuck me.” Then she zipped up my pants, dusted herself off, and another elevator came.

To make a long story short – it never worked out. The client was unusually nervous, and by the time I finished the court reporter had been asleep for hours – and probably felt put down. The next day I left. I tried again the next time I was there, and discovered a boyfriend in the picture, and so I Nancy Friday

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gave it up – but I often fantasize about that incredibly sexy court reporter and what might have been.

In thinking about it, the
most
incredible fantasy might well be that my letter would be included in your next book and that a woman reading it would intuitively and correctly know that she was “my type” and I hers. And, in her mind’s eye, she might even picture a blue-eyed, dark-haired, half-Mexican lawyer. He would be a man who would undress with his eyes a woman for whom he felt an instant appeal. His crotch would bulge but not unusually, because his circumcised cock would be an average length, although perhaps a little thicker in girth. His dress might be conservative lawyer’s clothes, or jeans and a T-shirt.

In the end, the only thing to do would be for the woman to approach and ask, “Pardon me, aren’t you ...? To which he would instantly reply, “Yes – I’m the man from the book.

I’ve been waiting for you to ask me!”

I am aware that perhaps the pitfalls of sharing and/or living out fantasies has been belabored to the near exclusion of describing the excitement – even exaltation – that comes from asking one’s lover into the secret confines of the erotic imagination.

If you decide to go ahead, note that in the most happily played-out fantasies in this chapter, coercion plays no part.

The ideas are discussed, and agreement is voluntary, with no threats of “Well, if you won’t, I’ll leave you and find someone who will.”

A step-by-step approach is always safest. When you talk about the new blonde at the office, does your lover get edgy?

That’s a warning signal. If you do decide to go ahead, describe one of your fantasies with
her
at the center. No matter how outrageous, she is still the star. Questions of possessive-ness or desertion do not enter.

Perhaps you can find a description of your fantasy in a book or film. Let her read the pages in the book, take her to Men In Love

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see the movie. If the idea intrigues her, you might safely go on to say it’s not too far from one of your own favorite thoughts. But if descriptions of unusual sex acts cause anxiety, maybe you’d better keep your fantasies to yourself.

Finally, be sure you know which of you really thinks some idea is “terrible.” Are you certain she would be outraged to learn that one of your dearest wishes – which you’ve been afraid to ask because you
know
she’d find it dirty is, for instance, to have her lovingly take your cock in her mouth and bring you to orgasm? If you haven’t found some loving way at least to mention the idea to her, you might ask yourself this: Am I projecting my own prudish fears onto her?

BOOK: FOREWORD
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