Forget Me Not (Love in the Fleet) (9 page)

Sky looked at Philip and said, “What do you think,
Phil-up
? You think we should grow up?”

“Only if we have to,
Bri-an.”

“Ass-hole.”

“Jerk-off.”

Hallie rolled her eyes. “I mean, naming me Lacey after one silly mistake. How was I supposed to know my microphone was on when I was trying to revive Philip? You’re
the one who told me that whispering ‘lavender lace skivvies’ would bring him out of the coma.” Hallie smiled hesitantly over the memory from that otherwise nightmare of a Med-Evac flight two years ago.

“We usually get our nicknames from one silly mistake, sweetheart.”

“Do not tell me you pull that sweetheart stuff around Daisy.”

“Yeah, and it drives her crazy.”

“Crazy she likes it, or crazy get-out-of-my-face, jerk?”

“Um, the latter, but…”

Hallie threw up her hands in surrender. “I rest my case.”

“Hey, I don’t call women anything I don’t call my helicopter and you know how much I love her.”

“Yeah, and tell me again why the military calls their ships and aircraft ‘her,’ in case I forgot.” Cynicism dripped from Hallie’s voice.

The men cried in unison, “Because they’re so expensive to keep in paint and powder!”

“You guys are incorrigible.” Hallie shook her head but chuckled just the same. “Philip, I swear, you lose a year’s worth of maturity every minute you spend with him.”

“Thanks for getting me in trouble, Sky.”

Sky’s grin lit the room. “Bite me, bro.”

Philip grabbed his jacket. “Come on. Let’s go get a beer.”

“So we can talk like men?”

“Nah, so we can talk about not growing up.” Philip kissed Hallie on the lips and then on the belly. He looked at Sky and waggled his eyebrows. “Although I gotta admit. Growing up does have its benefits.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to feel the baby,
Bri-an
?” Hallie asked. “She’s kicking right now.”

Sky looked from one to the other, then sat down hesitantly next to Hallie and let her place his hand on her tummy. “Hey there, little girl. What’s happ’nin’?”

Something rippled under his hand, and then he felt a tiny thud.

He looked up in wonder. “Oh, my God. Was that her?”

Hallie’s face lit with joy. “Pretty cool, don’t you think?”

“Well, yeah.” Impulsively, he leaned down and kissed her belly, just as Philip had done. “Don’t worry, honey. Uncle Sky is gonna tell you all about men. You’ll never have to worry about a thing as long as I’m around, sunshine.”

He caught Philip exchanging a secret, humorous look with his wife as they shook their heads at him.

“Come on
Bri-an.
Beer’s getting warm,” Philip said.

“No, you don’t understand. He said he would have married her. There is no way I can keep seeing this guy,” Daisy said to Lillian as they unpacked boxes of high-protein dog food and stacked them in the waiting room.

“Don’t you think it’s time for you to move forward, Daisy? It’s been two years. Maybe you should start dating again,” Lillian suggested.

“I don’t need to date and if I did, it certainly wouldn’t be someone like Brian Crawford.”  

“I still say he’s cute. And he’s been nothing but a gentleman.

“Ha!” Daisy exclaimed.

“He’s done volunteer work with you. Didn’t you say he was helpful at all those places? You said the people loved him. And he’s definitely not hard on the eyes.” Lillian’s mouth tipped up in a sheepish grin. “You know what I think is particularly sexy about Cap’n Crawford?”

Daisy covered her ears. “I do not want to hear this.”

“His smile and that space between his teeth. It makes me want to, you know…” She smiled. “Explore it or something.”

Daisy rolled her eyes, then bent to slit open another box. “Do not go there, Lillian.”

“Oh, Daisy, I think he’d be good for you. Tell him about Jack. I bet he’ll understand. He’s a pilot.”

“That’s exactly why I’m not interested. Just what I need. To get involved with another pilot. What if I...? What if he...? I can’t do it again. And I am not telling him about Jack so he can feel obligated to me for anything. And don’t you dare tell him either. Actually, I think it might be better for everyone if he finds himself another vet.”

“But I’d miss him. He cheers me up every time he comes in.”

“Well, then why don’t you go out with him? Take him off my hands. You go ahead and see if your tongue fits—never mind.”

But Lillian was already laughing. “Ah, so we’ve tried it, have we? And does it? Fit?”

“We did not have this conversation, Lillian.” But Daisy
laughed as she stormed back to her surgery.

Philip slid his wallet into his pocket after paying for two beers. “Holy shit, buddy, you got it bad.”

“Got what bad?” Sky grabbed a handful of peanuts and started cracking them open.

“You didn’t even check out that waitress, and she was a babe.”

Sky glanced around the dimly lit, upscale bar. “What waitress?”

“My point exactly.” Philip chuckled and twisted the cap off his beer. “You heard from Nick lately?”

“No, but you know I’m flying with his brother, right?”

“Yeah, how’s Mikey doing?”

Sky chomped on a peanut. “Pretty good. The kid’s smart. He’s a trustworthy co-pilot, for a lieutenant j.g. I’m still amazed Nick would trust me with his baby brother though.”

“Look, Sky, nobody questions your aviation skills. Just because no one would trust you with his
sister.
” They both laughed. “What’s the Nickster up to?”

“He’s still on the USS
New York
, but Mikey said Nick and Brooke broke up again. Sounds like it’s for good this time.”

Philip grimaced.

“I mean, that’s what? The third time since graduation?” Sky reached for more peanuts. “Same old. Same old. He wants to get married. She keeps saying ‘soon.’ I know I shouldn’t say anything bad about Brooke, ’cuz she’s an Academy classmate, but I’ve always felt her Navy career was more important to her than Nick ever was. Anyway, Mikey told me Nick put in for an exchange program with the British Royal Navy.”

“Because he’s interested in diplomatic relations?” Philip asked.

“Naw, I think he just wants to get away from Brooke. The
New York
’s moving to Mayport and she’s headed there too. Anyway, if he gets accepted for the program, maybe he’ll have better luck with—
ahem
—international affairs.”

Philip sipped his beer. “Speaking of affairs, what’s with this Daisy? Oh, right. Guess it can’t be called an affair if there’s no sex. What’s up with that?”

Sky dumped his peanut shells into the bowl. “I’ve only known her a week.”

“My point exactly. What’s wrong with you? You haven’t been vitamin-S deprived since Plebe summer.”

“Come on, Bill. It’s not like I jump into bed with every woman I meet.” Philip leveled him with a look. “Hey, what do you think I am?”

“That’s just it. I’ve known Sky a long time. So I’m wondering what you’ve done with him.”

Sky leaned back in the booth and smiled. “I kind of like how Daisy calls me Brian. Makes me feel grown up.” He reached for another peanut. “Shit, I was hoping that would never happen. But it’s kind of cool.”

Philip set his beer down, placed his forearms on the table, and looked seriously at his alpha male wingman. “Maybe growing up isn’t such a bad idea. Look at your squadron CO. He’s what? A commander? Married with a couple of kids, right? People admire him and you know he’s going to make captain. It’s very likely he behaved like you did in his twenties, but what if he was still out drinking every night and chasing skirts? One, he wouldn’t have made CO, and two, would you respect a boss who acted that way? You keep behaving the way you do and you’re going to end up like Mick Jagger. Pushing seventy and still acting like you’re twenty.”

“Okay, you made your point. No, I swear, watching you and Hallie just now. I think maybe I want what you have. You know, wife, kids. Well, not like tomorrow.”

“The way you were talking, it sounds like this Daisy could be The One
.
”

“Maybe. She’s an amazing woman and I respect the hell out of her.”

Philip’s mouth tipped up in a smile. “Sounds serious. I’ve never heard you use the words
woman
and
respect
in the same sentence before. So have you told her you’re in love with her?”

“Nah. I’m not that far gone.” Sky picked at the label on his beer bottle and gave it a pensive look, while chewing on the inside of his cheek. “I’m not sure I ever will be.”

“Why not? You told me a minute ago you’re thinking about maybe settling down.”

“I don’t know.” Sky glanced around the bar, took in the other patrons, the bartender drying a glass with a green dishtowel, the waitress he would have noticed a week ago, and then back at Philip. “What if I, like, got married some day and…what if I died and left her behind? I don’t understand how a guy can do a dangerous job with a family waiting back home.”

Philip set his beer down on the coaster and settled back into the red leather seat. “This is about Daniel, isn’t it?”

Sky didn’t respond right away. He was too focused on rearranging peanut shells in the bowl.

“You ever feel responsible for your guys who died in the attack on the
Blanchard
? Like, maybe there was something you could have done to save them?”

“Every day—and every night—for a while,” Philip said. “I had some pretty bad dreams that first year. I mean, Bulldog was like my right-hand man.
I kept trying to rescue him and Harris, but I was paralyzed. I couldn’t do a damn thing for them, which is exactly what happened when I got knocked out. But
Hallie made me
take advantage
of all the rehab—and I mean
all
the rehab—even talking with a shrink.”

“Oh, I did that too. You know, the required number of sessions with the squadron doc,” Sky said.

“No, this went beyond the required number of sessions. See…” Now it was Philip’s turn to glance around the bar, his fingers finding their way into his hair before he turned back to Sky. “I was afraid if I stopped…you know…beating myself up for not saving them, that it meant they weren’t important. Like, if I went on with my life, then their deaths didn’t really matter. And that was so not true. Is this making any sense?”

Sky’s fingers stilled on the table, frozen in rearranging the peanut shell puzzle pieces. Did it make any sense? Did the Navy have ships? “Yeah, it makes sense. It makes perfect sense.” So maybe Sky would focus on allowing himself to move on from Daniel’s death. And then he’d be fine. But a wave of dizziness washed over him at that thought. Sky squeezed the edge of the leather seat with both hands as if to anchor himself. The very idea of leaving Daniel behind and moving forward with his own life was just plain wrong.

Philip rolled the bottom edge of his beer bottle around the coaster, before setting it back down again. He was as nervous dumping this emotional stuff on the table as Sky was picking it up.

Philip found his voice again. “Until I was able to get past that, I went through this thing where I didn’t think I deserved to marry Hallie and be happy. I mean, Bulldog and Harris weren’t going to get that chance, so I felt guilty about everything.”

Sky’s heart stutter-stepped. “Exactly. So, how did you get past it?”

“Don’t forget, Hallie had her own demons to deal with from that night. So we went out of the system. Found some good civilian doctors and paid out of pocket, but it was worth it. We could have carried that shit around with us our whole lives. See, I still couldn’t wrap my brain around why they died and I didn’t.” 

“Bingo.” Sky replied, fingers rearranging peanut shells again.

“But Hallie wasn’t afraid to say, ‘I need help.’ And she dragged my ass along for good measure. We stopped trying to figure out why it wasn’t us that died. Instead, we accepted that we’d been given a second chance at life, and therefore have an obligation to do good things in the world.” Philip grinned. “And what could be more positive than having a baby?”

“Yeah, I guess so,” Sky said, mulling it over but thinking it all sounded a little too touchy-feely for him.

“Anyway, talking with someone really helped us. You might think about it.”

“Yeah, maybe, but I pretty much got a handle on it.” Which was a blatant lie.

“Beating myself up for not saving my men or not dying wasn’t going to do anybody any good. Least of all my wife or my kid. The bottom line was Hallie gave me an attitude adjustment by making me focus on what I
can
do instead of what I can’t—or couldn’t—do.”

Sky ran his fingers through his hair. “Sounds great in theory, but tell it to my dreams.”

“You still leaving chicks’ beds in the middle of the night?” Philip asked.

Sky’s heart rate ratcheted up a notch. His eyes flickered to Philip. “You know about that?”

“Yeah, you got drunk one night and told me. How you didn’t want to risk having a nightmare in some woman’s bed.”

“Holy shit.” Sky huffed out a breath and leaned back in the booth. “So I have a bad dream now and then. It’s not a big deal. Can’t a man have a couple of secrets?” 

Philip’s mouth tipped up at the corner. “Not if he drinks beer, he can’t. So what are you going to do if this Daisy invites you into her bed? Leave after she’s asleep?”

Sky’s bravado kicked in. “
If
? You mean
when
. This is the Skylark you’re talking to, bro. They
all
eventually invite me into their beds.”