Forgotten Love (Derrien Island Trilogy) (22 page)

“Thanks but no thanks, the last thing that I want to do now is play volleyball,” replied Marcus.

“Look Marcus, I can’t tell you how to live your life but ever since we got back from Georgia you have been either like a zombie or pushing yourself over the top. I know you are upset about your marriage but don’t push away all of your friends too!” cautioned Sheldon.

Marcus unable to listen anymore to people concerned about him leapt to his feet
in frustration and began to pace the floor in front of the TV once more.

“What does everyone expect from me? If it is not you telling me I have a chance where none exists, its
Lucinda and now lately even the DiMinoglio’s have been bothering me too,” said Marcus in an irritated tone.

Sheldon could hear
that Marcus was nearing a breaking point decided to back off realizing that his friend needed his support more and his advice less at this point.

“Ok
ay Marcus, look we all just want you to find some peace and see our old friend again, that’s all. I know this is a really rough time for you,”

“Sheldon, I think that old friend is gone, because he was the one
couldn’t save his marriage. I don’t want to see him ever again, and if I do it won’t be soon enough. I am just going to let Natasha have what she wants, I’m tired waiting and hoping that something will change.”

Sheldon could hear the resolve in his friend
’s voice and knew that he had made up his mind. Frankly, it was just like him to try to shoulder all the blame and Sheldon wished he could help Marcus see that any breakdown in a relationship always involves two people, not one and Natasha was the one dealing the blows.

“
I think it is time I just got out of her way. Sometimes the best gift you can give someone is space.” he continued.

“Look Marcus, I am going now, I will check
up on you later,” said Sheldon not knowing what else to say at that moment.

“Yeah, later bro.”

As Marcus’ attention refocused on the scene in front of him, he saw a flash on Natasha’s left hand that he did not see before then. As he leaned forward to focus on the screen he saw that Natasha was still wearing her wedding band. Surprise and a sense of hope filled Marcus as he wondered if Sheldon was right about what he thought Natasha said. Questions filled his mind as he wondered why a woman who was asking for a divorce was wearing her wedding rings in plain sight on national television. Her publicity team would have a fit if they noticed that, he was sure. Many people wore rings on any finger they chose and perhaps viewers would not think anything of it but to him it meant everything.

The significance of th
is left Marcus feeling extremely confused as he watched Natasha walk back from the performance area to the sitting area. When she sat, she began to unconsciously twist the rings on her finger while her expression grew wistful, and she looked down at them for a few seconds before smiling again and receiving the adulation of the studio audience.

“Natasha, why are you still wearing your rings?” Marcus asked speaking
to her image on the television screen.

At that moment he looked down at his own hand and saw that n
ot even he had even considered taking off his wedding band either. Looking at his band and replaying what he saw Natasha do, Marcus wondered if what Sheldon implied could be true. Did she still love him and was there some tiny chance that he could prove to her that his attitude to her having an international career had changed completely?

The sound of applause jerked Marcus out of his thoughts as the screen moved on to advertisements
signalling the end of the interview. Marcus switched off the television with the remote and walked over to stand near the bank of windows overlooking the countryside below. The sun was now setting and a warm golden glow was now cast over everything in the room.

Marcus looked out at the land h
e had called home for the last five years of his life and wondered if his stubbornness to elevate the importance of this place in his life had really been worth it. A house was an asset and one that he could leave and return to when he liked. He could even transform it into an income property without dishonouring the memory of his parents. In fact, they would have been pleased that it would be so useful to him. Marcus knew at that moment that his parent’s memory would live on in his heart forever but if his hunch was right he still had a glimmer of a chance to become a part of his wife’s present.

“Sorry Natasha but I am not signing those papers until I know the truth
,” he said to himself finally. This time he would make sure that he brought her the undeniable proof of his support and love if she would have him. He would have to book a flight to Atlanta as soon as possible.

As Lucas’ town car zipped through traffic to the airport, he was thrilled that Natasha had consented to him picking her up from the airport. Finding a flight out to California at the last minute from Georgia was a challenge to say the least and he had too many appointments lined up to grant her request three days ago. Now that she was back, he wanted to reconnect with her and find out if she’d made any progress in her divorce. Watching the traffic whizz by in the opposite direction, Lucas silently wondered what it was about Natasha’s jerk of a soon to be ex-husband that was preventing their relationship from becoming closer. It was as though she would let him come so far and no further. Yes, he was always the first person she called when she needed to talk but she always resisted his romantic advances. He was her friend, and an advisor and that was it.

Although he was willing to
temporarily accept that before now, he was becoming restless waiting.  Until those divorce papers were signed nothing about his relationship with Natasha could move forward. After all, she was still wearing her wedding rings. He’d tried suggesting gently that she take them off and she’d ignored all of his suggestions. She took them off briefly during photo shoots but she promptly put them back on once they were over. As a talent director he could read body cues and pick up on unspoken language easily, after all he was paid a lot of money to discover the next stars in film, drama and the music industry. So, when he saw Natasha twist the rings on her finger at the end of her performance of ‘
Brave
’ and the expression that flitted across her features for a few seconds, he realized to his chagrin that Marcus was not out of the picture as yet. He had been patient enough and that was keeping him safely in the friend zone. It was obvious that he needed to do a little more to let Natasha know that his intentions were serious.

T
onight everything between them would change because he decided that they would share their first kiss. Nothing more, not yet at least, because he did not want to scare her away but she had to know that his feelings were real  and so were hers for him. She just wasn’t allowing herself to feel them. They always had such a good time together that he found it impossible to believe that Natasha felt absolutely nothing for him.

As he sat in the car his nerves were on edge as he imagined what it would be like to finally taste the flavour of her lips. She was not a big fan of heavy lipstick but instead used a lot of fruity oils to keep her lips moist and many had the most amazing scents. It was all he could do not to lean over and kiss her the last time she had rubbed on some orange scented lip gloss the last time he had seen her. But tonight all of that would change. He needed to push a little harder to let her see that he could be much more than her faithful helper and her friend but that they could share a real and passionate connection with each other.

“Natasha, you did really well on that interview,” said Lucas as he leaned forward smiling at his dinner date in the candlelight.

“Thanks Lucas, Natasha replied, I was a little nervous at first but I remembered to breathe and told myself that a stadium of fans was a bigger deal than a small studio audience
so I need to get accustomed.”

“Well, it wasn’t actually just a studio audience you know,
the Ellen Show is broadcasted all across the US and the world.”

Natasha froze as
she thought of the tens of millions of people who might have seen her on the show, but quickly laughed when she saw the mirth in Lucas’ eyes.

“Thank God
, I did not speak to you before the interview, or else I would truly have been a bundle of nerves,” she joked.

“Yeah I think you are right, I don’t think the ‘deer staring into the headlights’
, look would have been good for your first major TV interview,” he continued with a laugh.

After
Lucas picked her up at the airport, she’d gone home to change and now they were meeting for a celebration dinner.

“So what did you think about the
recording for the song ‘Brave’. I know you’ve heard me sing it before in the studio, but how did it come off in front of that live audience?” asked Natasha.

“I keep telling you that you need to see yourself as I do. You were born for this life. Your voice, rhythm, expression, everything was simply wonderful.”

“Really?” she replied Natasha feeling a little relieved that Lucas gave such a positive review. This song ‘
Brave
’ was supposed to be a celebration of boldness and freedom in pursuing the dream of love but all the song did for her was to stir up afresh the full intensity of the feelings she still had for Marcus since the night he visited her. She wished that he could have been there in the studio audience enjoying the moment with her and be the one she was having dinner with. Instead here was Lucas was doing what he did best, being her friend by making her feel at ease and giving her something to laugh about.

“Lucas”, she began “I don’t know what I would
do without you! Seriously, you make me laugh, you make sure I don’t forget to eat and starve myself when I am working by bringing me lunch and taking me to dinner, you hang out with me....” her voice trailed off as she looked at him appreciatively asking herself once again why couldn’t it have been Marcus.

Lucas expression grew serious but the lines of his face appeared soft as the golden light from the candles reflected in his eyes.

“Natasha,” he said softly, “you know why I do it!” he said his voice low and smooth as he looked directly into her eyes meaningfully.

“Lucas
don’t,” Natasha began, but Lucas reached out and cupped her cheek with his hand and traced the outline of her cheekbone with his thumb, silently asking her not to respond and spoil the moment. Natasha reached up and took hold of his hand to draw it away as an uncomfortable feeling passed through her and as she did she saw him glance briefly at the rings she still wore before looking down at his plate quickly before gently disengaging his hand.

“I just wanted you to know that I think you are exceptional to keep taking care of me like this
. I appreciate all that you have done to help me get to this point and I won’t forget it,” she said warily while watching him retreat. She wasn’t trying to lead him on but more and more it was becoming obvious that Lucas was getting frustrated with her.

Lucas looked at her for a moment and exhaled forcefully
. “Natasha, I was serious about what I said to you that day in Forsyth Park. I love you and I want you in my life.  So, I am only doing what comes from the heart naturally,” he admitted plainly.

“
I know Lucas, but I’m not over Marcus! I’m still in love with him,” blurted Natasha.

“You
are?” asked Lucas trying to restrain the degree of deflation he felt at hearing her utter those words. “But I thought you sent him the divorce papers. You know what that means for your career. Hasn’t he signed and returned them to you as yet?”

“No, not yet!” replied Natasha barely audible.

Lucas observed her demeanour and knew that although she had made several bold steps she was still wrestling with the failure of her marriage. He wanted nothing more than to help her to release that pain and uncertainty from her life. He knew she couldn’t get married under her contract but that wouldn’t stop her from being able to be with him even if it meant doing so secretly. She would make her publicity appearances but she would come home to him. He knew how this worked but Marcus would never accept her new life.

“Are you having second thoughts
about the divorce, Natasha?” asked Lucas holding his breath and silently hoping that she wasn’t.

Natasha did not respond immediately to Lucas’ question because the truth was that she did not know the answer as clearly as she thought she did
before anymore. Yes, her contract indicated that she had to be single by the time her first album was launched, but she didn’t want that and she was not sure that she still wanted her contract, at least not under the current terms. Couldn’t the terms be renegotiated she wondered? Maybe with her successes so far, she had a bit more leverage than she had in the beginning?

“I guess I am just
feeling a little sentimental about things”, she said not revealing all that she was thinking. Lucas would just try to tell her that it could never happen.

At that moment Natasha’s phone rang and she fished it out of her purse.