From The Wreckage - Complete (71 page)

Walking into the main building is surreal. When he was admitted almost a year ago, it was with a reluctant and disbelieving attitude. He agreed because Jules’ father was adamant he would not let him see her until he got counseling. He agreed because that same night after her dad left, his own father sat him down and told him how his mom wouldn’t want him to keep punishing himself. He did it for Jules and his mom; he thought he was fine. It wasn’t until he met Dani that he realized he wasn’t as fine as he thought.

He smiles at the front desk workers and nurses, recognizing them all, and they come around to hug him and say how happy they are to see him looking so good. 

“You know Dr. Steel will be angry you came on a Sunday,” the head nurse over weekend shifts admonishes him.

“I know. Maybe we could keep the visit to ourselves?” He winks and asks about Dani.

“My lips are sealed, gorgeous,” she teases back. “As for Dani, she’s where she’s always at. Or she was last time I made rounds.”

Thanking the ladies at the desk, he holds Jules’ hand and heads to the courtyard where he knows he’ll find his friend sitting in the shade of the large oak trees. The hallways of Crestdale are all painted a light creamy yellow color. The brick walks devoid of artwork, with the exception of a landscape picture or two. He sends a fast glance Jules way to see her reaction to where he spent his time and catches a glimpse of her chewing her bottom lip.

“You okay?” he asks when they round the corner and approach a set of glass doors leading out into the common area. 

She nods silently.

They open the doors and enter back into the late afternoon sun; the October air today finally has a small touch of fall in it. 

“There she is.” He points towards the largest tree.

From where they stand, they can barely make out the person lying under the tree, but West knows. It’s the spot they used to sit under daily, and her sweat pant covered legs are propped up with her knees in the air. Jules squints across the paved commons.

“It’s her favorite spot,” he explains. “Come on.”

“Old habits die hard?” he asks when they make it to Dani’s side. Her eyes are closed and she doesn’t move, except for her mouth. Her lips crack a small smile and West smiles in return, happy to see her again.

“So nice of you to finally visit me,” she says sarcastically, turning her head their way and opening her eyes.

Dani sucks in a deep breath and sits up, pushing her black hair back as she takes in Jules by his side.

“I brought someone to meet you,” he points out.

Dani rises as West steps forward and lets go of Jules’ hand. He hugs her hard as she whispers, “I missed you.” 

After a few moments, West pulls back and looks her over. Her tall frame looks skinnier than before and he wonders if she’s been sliding back into a depression since he left. It’s easy to fall back into old habits.

“I missed you, too,” he tells her as he looks back at Jules, who smiles. 

“You didn’t lie,” Dani grumbles playfully. “She is beautiful.”

Jules’ cheeks go pink and she moves closer to hug Dani, gushing, “I’m so happy to meet you.” 

Dani’s big eyes grow even larger as Jules holds her and West laughs. Like him, Dani finds it difficult to accept affection from others. It was one of the things they bonded over in the short month they’d hung out together at Crestdale. 

When Jules finally lets Dani go, they sit in the grass together.

“I have to admit, when West kept giving me updates and you two weren’t together, I thought my sending the letters didn’t work and I truly thought you must be the coldest girl on the face of the earth to be able to resist those words.”

“Resist those… Dani, did you read my letters?” asks West, shocked.

“Oh, just one or two. I didn’t want to send them if they weren’t good.”

“You weren’t supposed to send them at all,” he reminds her, and Jules giggles as Dani makes a face at him.

“If I hadn’t, I have a feeling you’d still be moping around,” counters Dani.

Jules bumps into West shoulder with a smile. “I’m totally fine with her reading them and I’m absolutely grateful she mailed them.” She turns serious and looks at Dani sitting across from them. “Seriously, thank you for mailing them. I needed the push.”

“Sometimes we all need a push. You’re welcome.” 

They spend the next two hours sitting under the oak and talking. Dani asks about school and talks about her newfound love of football, thanks to West.

“I wish they televised your games, but I’ve been watching your brother.”

“You could come to a game, you know,” West points out and Dani frowns, offering an unenthusiastic ‘maybe.’

When it’s time to go and they’re standing at the main lobby again, Jules excuses herself to use the restroom, giving Dani and West a moment to speak alone.

“Dani?” he asks seriously, and she shakes her head.

“Don’t, West.”

“Don’t what? I didn’t even say anything.”

“No. It’s what you’re not saying. I recognize that voice. I’m fine.”

“Are you?”

She nods and looks out the glass door to the parking lot. She swipes at her cheek and then faces West. “I’ll be okay. This summer has been harder than I thought. You left and I got a little depressed.”

“I’m sorry, D.”

“Don’t be stupid. You don’t have to be sorry. I’m so happy for you and for Jules. She seems pretty amazing.”

“She is,” he agrees.

“I want that someday.”

He decides to pull her into a hug. “You’ll get it, you need to take care of you first,” he says, repeating advice she once gave him.

She snorts, pushing him away and rolling her eyes. “Using my words against me, huh?” She laughs before telling him seriously, “I’m trying. I had a slip back, but I’m recovering.”

“Can I help in anyway?” he asks, taking her slender hand in his.

“Just be happy. Make your dreams come true and live.” Her face changes into a smile and he looks behind him to see Jules returning.

“Hey, Jules, you keep this guy in check, okay?”

“No worries, I plan on doing that for a long, long time.” 

They hug and Jules thanks Dani, again, for mailing her West’s letters and promises they will come back soon to visit. Once they’re back in the truck and on the way home, Jules finally asks all the questions he’s sure she’s been dying to ask.

“You told her to come to a football game. Can she come and go as she wants?”

“At this point, yes. She was only sixteen the first time her grandparents sent her to Crestdale. She’s been in and out for two years now. Once she turned eighteen, over the winter, she was technically able to leave. She doesn’t have an order to be there. It’s voluntary.”

“Why does she stay then?”

Dani’s story is Dani’s story and West doesn’t feel right telling it for her, even to Jules. Instead, he explains it the best he can. “Remember all the guilt you felt after Tanya’s death? Dani’s family died and she feels the same. She hasn’t gotten over it yet. She wants to, though. She’s smart, baby,” he tells her when he sees the sadness overcome Jules. “She stays at CVC because she wants to get better.”

“When we first walked in there, I started to feel sick to my stomach because it felt cold and lonely and I hated knowing you had to be there,” she explains, and he nods, recalling her quiet looks before she met Dani. “Dani changed that. I could see how much she cares about you and I’m glad you were able to be there for her and her for you.”

So many things happened over the last fifteen months; each bad moment leading to something good. The realization puts a smile on his face. The tornado brought them together. The car wreck got him help and introduced him to Dani.
There is a purpose to the madness,
he allows. He’d stop believing in the purpose for a while but now he is reminded of Jules’ words at the vigil two months ago. Studying her sitting next to him in his truck, he feels a peace he’s never felt before and he repeats her words to her.

“Sometimes happy endings take time.” 

“I have one last thing for you,” West tells Jules a few hours later when he’s bringing her back to her dorm after dinner. He’d given her a leather bound journal at the restaurant for her to keep at her bedside, but he wasn’t done.

They park and West gets out, pulling his seat forward and producing a white box with a pink bow on top. He’s smiling at Jules as she walks around the front of the truck.

“Another present? You shouldn’t have,” she says as she claps her hands greedily. “Give me!”

“Ha! Hang on. Come with me.” 

They walk past her building and West searches for a place to take her. It’s a little after nine and the campus is still buzzing with students hanging around, couples walking together, people drinking coffee and groups chatting on benches. It takes them ten minutes before they finally find a bench where he sits her down and hands her the box. She pulls the top off with giddy excitement. 

“What in the world could this be?” she wonders aloud as she moves the tissue paper. When her eyes see the gift, she laughs and pulls the blue and white Freemont number twelve jersey out of the box. 

“I figured my girl should wear my number. It’s a woman’s cut, especially for you.”

She holds the jersey up and turns it around to look at the back where his name is written. 

“Awww, you signed it!” her voice breaks and West lowers her arm to see her eyes wet with tears.

He’d written ‘I love you, always’ in his number and signed his first name for her. He’d signed the jersey as something of a joke – the big shot QB signing something for a fan – but afterward he realized he didn’t want people to think she was just “another fan”. So he wrote ‘I love you’ to show everyone she is more than some chick that he’d autographed a shirt for. He’d started to think it was stupid to be so territorial, but her tears tell him he did the right thing.

“I’m so proud of you, you know that right?” She asks.

He shakes his head, not needing her praise tonight, but it doesn’t deter her.

“I mean it, West. I want you know how amazing I think you are. You came back to this sport and you’ve rocked the hell out of it. Your mom would be so proud of you.”

He touches the jersey in her hands and smiles at her comment. “Did I tell you about the plan?”

“The plan?”

“Dr. Steel had this plan. It was her idea to get me to try to walk-on here. Before I would even open up to her about my feelings, about you or my mom, the only thing we talked about for the longest time was football. The only reason I agreed at first was because I thought it would get my dad off my back and -” He stops, not wanting to put pressure on her with the truth.

“And because you thought it would help win me back,” she finishes for him softly. He looks at her, startled that she already knows.

“Mindy told me I was your motivation,” she admits.

“Yeah, you were at first. Then when I thought you were with Austin, I kinda snapped out of that. I threw myself into training even harder to prove to myself that I could do it. That first game it hit me like a ton of bricks, babe. There are two things in this world I don’t want to live without - you and football. I know how much it sucks for me to be so busy all the time and us not getting to see each other-”

“No.” She reaches out and presses her fingers to his cheek as she shakes her head. “I don’t care how hard it is, you are living your dream and I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

Theres a tense quiet in the air between them and West smiles to break the unexpected seriousness this moment has taken. “You know, those colors might be a bit dangerous for an A&M girl to have.” 

She laughs, holding the shirt up in front of her. “This is so perfect. I will be honored to wear these colors, even here on campus.” 

“Don’t go overboard now, babe. I promise to give you an A&M jersey once I make the team.” West coughs and nods his head toward the box.  “There’s one more thing in there.”

Jules tucks the jersey in her lap and sets the box on the bench, looking in and pulling out a simple brown box and she looks at him.

“Katie knew where you kept it and snuck it to me the other night.” West takes it from her fingers. “You’re not mad, are you? I was hoping you’d consider wearing it again,” he explains as he takes the lid off and pulls out the rose gold anchor ring he gave her for her eighteenth birthday last year. “I thought about buying you something new, but this one has so much meaning.”

She sits there, staring at the ring, and West begins to think he’s made a terrible mistake when she finally speaks.

“Again, I think it’s perfect. I loved that ring. You know I didn’t take it off until June.” West looks at her, his pulse racing. “I took it off right before I left for school. That’s why I got the tattoo, actually. I needed something to remind me of you, of us.”

He holds the ring up, his brows lift as he meets her blue eyes, “May I?” She nods and he slides the ring back onto her ring finger where it belongs.